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[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "But the point is they're all beautiful in their own little way and on all of them, especially if BN works. It's wonderful and it works fast. Simple thing, done right. Go to expressvpn.com slash lexpod for an extra three months free. This is the Lex Friedman podcast. Disappointed, please check out our sponsors in the description. And now, dear friends, here's Bert Kreischer. I read somewhere that you like Ernest Hemingway. Love him. There's a quote, there's nothing too writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed. Do you agree with that?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I agree. I agree. Well, I agree with that with journaling. I can't write stand up. I can't write a bit, but if I journal, I'll find something that I go just write. kind of writing where you're the pens moving faster than your brain and they're kind of like doing it together. The thing I liked about Ernest Hemingway, this is so stupid. I'm a little dyslexic and so I'm not a good reader. And so he wrote very simply and it wasn't until after I read a bunch of Ernest Hemingway, I was working in parts of Noble and this person said, don't you love his titles? And I was like, yeah, Sun Also Rises. And they're like, yeah, but And the sun also rises. And I was like, yeah, sun also rises. And they're like, no, no, the sun also rises. And I went, oh, oh, yeah, that is fucking badass. Yeah. And then I'm like always late to the party with anything. And then that night we were all doing coke. And it was like five in the morning and we ended up on the roof of my apartment in Greenwich Village. And it's Like I'm a sunset guy, I grew up in Florida, but sunrises in New York are electric blue, like electric blue. And I was like, the sun also rises."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah, he was so good with just a handful of words, the simplicity, the choice of words. Like basically his process is carving down."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Right, drunk, edit sober."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Right, drunk, edit sober."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah, but he was good at like, A small amount of words to get a point across. I'm the exact fucking opposite."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Well, he's also said the first draft of anything is always shit. Is that is that true for you?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I think so. It's the best one I have."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Because Donald Hill from there. So for you, editing is destroying the original."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "The first time I tell it, it's perfect. It's perfect it just it works and then i go great and then i take it and i try to fix it and make it better and jazzy i just joking razzle dazzle about my daughters and i drive and pass the deaf child sign. And i just told it on stage it just happened and louis was in the audience. He was, I love that joke. I said, really? He was, yeah, and I just told it and I went, done. Louis C. K. says he likes a joke. It's fucking, it's in the special. And I tried to fucking razzle, dazzle that joke into like a 15 minute bit. It got to the point where it was so, it was so bad that I told him, I did a podcast with him. I said, what did you like about that joke? Cause I can't get it to work anymore. Because it was just simple. It was simple that your daughter didn't know how they'd figure out where deaf kids lived. I went, that's it? He was like, yeah, I was like, nothing about gun control. And he was like, huh? I was like, oh, fuck, man. I really fucked that joke up. And then I had to, I had to go back to the beginning of it, but that first time that's when, that's when the joke comes out, purest for me. And then it's always chasing back to get that, get that first telling. Some jokes are different. Like the machine obviously was a much longer story and like, and like escape room for this one. The longer stories take a little work, but the, the simple ones, like, like the deaf child and pajamas and those first times are perfect."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "What do you think is is it about the machine story that works that was so captivating for people?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I think it's a I think I don't know. I really wish I don't know. I think it's a good story. It's a good story. I think everyone has something similar that happened in their life where they had a crazy night and that no one believed and they told their friends and their friend or they experienced that with a friend like that and And I think, I think that's gotta be it. I really don't know. I think there's a part of, I think there's a part of the, like our community of comedy fans that were that early Desquad that was fun to watch someone take something from the podcast and turn it into a bit on stage. I think there was a lot of that, but I think people identify with a wild, crazy night that got out of control that they've probably had too. I think I don't fucking know."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Do you think Putin knows who you are because of that story?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I hope so. I fucking hope so. I hope so. But there's a part of me that you gotta understand is like, I'm not... I say stuff like that. I'm sure there's someone hears that and they go, who is this fucking narcissist? You're like, no, that's not it. I'm just telling you the truth. Like I understand what I'm supposed to say. Well, you know, I don't know. I don't know. That's hard to say, but I don't give a shit about that guy. I'm not that guy. I'm telling you everything that comes out of my mouth. The second it comes out, I'm going to be 100% honest. I don't know any other way to live. I kind of hope so. That would be fucking cool. And I look, I know he's a bad, I guess he's a bad dude. I don't follow politics done, but it'd be cool if like one day someone's like, uh, he's, he's on his computer and some guy goes, and he's like, and he's like, and he's like, and he shows it to him. And, and then he's like, I'm fucking this guy, huh?"
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-0 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "It's not out of the realm of possibility that Putin has watched it. And this podcast, this has kind of made me realize how small the world is."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I've gotten to meet some incredibly, like, interesting people. Like that's, I mean, that's the thing where I go. It's gotten really crazy. The internet's really insane and Netflix is really insane and the reach of like people that like this is really simple, but like I'm a big fan of the show Drink Champs. I didn't think in a million years Nori would ever know who I was. And then he offered me to come to his podcast and then when I got there, he told me he was a fan of mine and I went like, I remember moving to New York, listening to you and Capone like I'm sitting there going, wow. Again and then and the phone calls I've gotten since the movie came out and since razzle dazzle came out have been really insane when you realize. As much as I know about people and I like there's people I'm fans of that don't know who I am that like that are like, they're like some pitcher in fucking Florida that I follow the kids. I like I just fun to watch and pitch. There was a softball player in Tempe that she's do catching drills and I was really into softball with my daughter and we watch her catching girls. There's a girl deglazer who me and my daughters will watch her dance videos and then I hit her up. She's like, you know who I am. And you're like, oh, yeah, that's the way the world works."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "What world leader would you drink with if you could see much in Putin? So Putin doesn't drink much. Yeah, Zelensky drinks more. Yeah, also not much."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Of course. He also would have been a good man. He would have been a fucking good one. I mean like I go Hitler was a pussy like he drank wine with it with a cut with a spoonful of sugar in it. You don't drink. What's Churchill? That's my hole and that's my guy. Yeah, you know, that's my guy, right? No, I don't know that's your guy."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "So he, uh, he did champagne."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Well, you don't have to tell me a thing about Winston Churchill. He, I found out about his daily routine. Yeah. So his daily routine was a big breakfast, cigar, coffee, eggs over eggs, sunny side up, toast, bacon, sausage, tomato, beans, uh, fruit, orange juice, soft scotch, cigar in bed. And he'd sit there for three hours. He'd hold morning breakfast and that's they'd come in and he'd run through his day and then he'd get in the bathtub for fucking an hour and drink champagne And then he'd go to lunch and have some goose or whatever the fuck day back then with more champagne and then And then he'd take a nap, and like, I love that. So every year on the day of his death, and he's January 24th, I celebrate Winston Churchill's life by living the way he did. And so I have breakfast in bed with a soft scotch, and I just party all fucking day. That would be the guy to drink with. That would be the guy if you could pick anyone to drink with."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "He drank every day throughout the day."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "He lived like 94."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "And was one of the most heroic figures in human history. Never, never surrender."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I mean, what a fucking badass thing. You know, he taught, he taught the queen. The queen was like, uh, like, uh, like a window licking idiot, right? Like she was, she had a third grade education. So like her dad dies and she's like 10 or 12 or whatever. The first thing they do is they pull her out of school. They're like, you've done learning. You're just going to be the queen. You gotta know, this is what you need to learn. Don't make, let people make eye contact with you. Put your hand out like this. Don't let people touch you. So she like, she had like a really, I saw the, by the way, I didn't do this research. I just watched the crown, okay? And Winston Churchill kind of taught her about world politics and was like, they like coming and she'd be like, Winston what did we do in Africa? He's like this is gonna be a tough one and so yeah, so but Winston Churchill's the badass But if I had a drink with someone living like drink there's like there's a too obvious one like obviously it's fucking Kim Jong-un right you kind of want to he drinks no he does You think my IVs are good in the morning, you know Kim Jong-un's IVs are next you're like I feel up and he's like it's infatamine He would be a badass to drink with."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I think he drinks hard liquor."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Uh, I think Scott Johnny Walker blue. That's what I've heard."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I don't know where you heard this, but I like this."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Okay. So I say things like that, but then I'm sure I, I, I, I don't know if you ever party with someone who just parties a little different than you. And then you notice like, like sometimes celebrity, like athletes and then like you're at a strip club and then they, they, they talk weird to a woman. You're like, Oh, that's not me. I'm so sorry. So that'd be the thing. The atrocities would be hard to get past with them."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Not just the atrocity, but the way of being. I agree with you. I actually don't like drinking with rich and powerful people often. There's something weird about them. Yeah. Not all of them."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "And I don't like, I don't like a drinking meeting. Like when someone goes like, like people go like, Hey, uh, I'm taking you out tonight. We're drinking. Yeah. And then I go, Oh, that's not the way I like to do it. It gives me anxiety. Like, um, our lives are very different."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-1 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "You and I?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah. Were you going to fraternity?"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "No. We could start there yet. No, I was not. Okay. And the differences continue from there, I'm sure."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "So when you get your pledge of pen, they take you out and their whole thing is you're going to, we're getting you fucked up. Yeah. That energy is not my energy. I don't like that. Like I just go, why don't we just get drunk and feel really good about ourselves? Like I never like took mushrooms to see Jesus. I just wanted to enjoy renex on a windshield. Like, so like that, that for me, uh, is like one of my things. So if Kim Jong-un flew me to North Korea to drink with him, I'd be like, I'd have to start really getting blackout drunk on the plane to enjoy drinking with him that day."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "What's your favorite, like different occasions. What's your favorite drink?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "What's your favorite way of drinking? It's, it's, I've got as varies."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "So what are the different contexts here? It's like one-on-one."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "One-on-one?"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Like you sit down with, I don't know, Rogan invites you like it's a godfather to sit down and finally have a talk about something."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "It's going to be whiskey. It's going to be like a nice whiskey. Neat. No, I like it on the rocks, not like lots of rocks. It won't be something expensive because Rogan is not, he's not a fancy boy, you know, like he's a real regular, he's a really regular dude. He's gotten less regular, the more millions of dollars he has. I think there's parts of him where you're like, like, where you're like, oh, wow, we can do this. Yeah. Um, but he's a rate, he'd be like Jack on the rocks or like, probably Buffalo Tracer, one of the, maybe a little whiskey he's buying. Rogan Beach, uh, whiskey rocks. And then like, that's a good, I haven't hung out with Joe by ourselves. I take that back. I was with him the other night, but like, it would be cool. My times with Joe's are always on podcasts. Yeah. And his I missed the times where it was we just have you and him at the store late night."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah, I'm okay with podcast. I used to think this is like performative or something like this, but it's not really."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "It's just a chance to really sit down. I enjoy it because of the people I could never sit down with. Like David Cross. I wouldn't never sit down with David Cross because we don't run in the same circles. But it's nice he has something to promote. And then he comes to my house and then we can sit down for an hour and talk. And then we're Kevin Smith. Like people I would never really hang out with. Tom. I enjoy being alone with Tom more. Off mic. Tom Segua. Yeah. We have a lot of history. There's a lot of things, secrets we know about each other, and there's a lot of secrets going on in each other's lives that I would never share on podcasts that I can talk to him about. And I really appreciate his, and I know this isn't on brand of us beating each other up, but I really appreciate his insight as a dad and as a dude and as a son. But he makes me giggle harder than anyone, so doing a podcast is fun."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "So there's something on a podcast that's performative for you with him, and then there's a part."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "With me and him, because we're trying to make each other laugh. But I'll tell you, if we're going back to drinks, I'll tell you, like a great afternoon drink is a Campari Spritz. It's one of my favorite drinks in the world. I don't even know what that is. Campari Spritz. Campari is an interesting alcohol Because I think it's a bitter or it's a liqueur and it's got a weird, rooty, earthy taste. It's red, so it looks like Kool-Aid. That's why I got into it. I thought Campania Nice would be oh, so nice. It's an old commercial, but man, it's fucking like sucking the green giant's dick. It is earthy. What's earthy? It's like, it tastes like roots. Oh, nice. It's not, it's not, it's, oh, there's a bitterness and like, it's just not great. And then someone introduced me to a Negroni which is Campari and gin and a little soda water and then Campari Spritz. Campari Spritz is Campari, Prosecco and soda water and like a wine glass and it is so enjoyable. It's got so many different profiles to it where you get the bitterness, but the sweetness of the prosecco and then it flattens it out with the soda water and it looks like goulade. So I love it. That's one of my favorite drinks to share in what context. Oh, you're in Italy. And you've been walking around Venice and everyone went their own ways and the whole family comes back together and you meet at a statue and your wife's sweating and she's uncomfortable and your daughters are 16 and 18 and they're like, what are we doing with the rest of the day? And you go, hey guys, it's Europe. Does anyone want to come party spritz? And everyone goes, I don't know what that is and you go, for compari spritz. It's minor in alcohol, so it's not gonna light them up, but it gives them a little bit of a buzz where they're like, dad, these are nice. Isla didn't drink hers, so I drank hers. Georgia had hers, Leanne had hers, and we ordered another round. I ordered, and they're fucking refreshing, and the buzz is perfect. It's not too much, because it's just a little bit of champagne and some compari. If the buzz is perfect, and then a couple of them, and then they kind of disappear, and then you just walk around again. That's a great fucking drink."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-2 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "You have a drink alone? So there's two kinds of alone. One is alone, like at a bar. There's other people, but they're strangers, right? They're kind of like out there. Can't have done that. Keep going."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Keep going. Don't walk me through all the alone."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "And then I'll tell you the rest. There's all kinds of... There's a alone on a train. Like transporting someone."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "A train."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "And then there's just a loan in an empty home."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Or a hotel room. Hotel. And it's Sunday night. Sunday night. And you're packing your bag and you got a flight at 6 a.m. Yeah. but road house is on and you're like, shit. So you get out of the front desk and go, is the bar still open? And they go, yeah, can I order some to take to my room? Sure. How about six Heineken's? Six Heineken's. Yeah, my wife wanted one too. She's not up there. You murdered her. And you just say to yourself, I'm just getting six so that if I have four, I just know I have two extra ones. And then you go through six and you're like, oh man, I'm not done yet. Dude, I've drank in every alone scenario you can possibly think of. I've drank, I've drank alone in a helicopter with a dude who didn't know I was drinking. He was like, I'm drinking here. And he's like, absolutely not. And then I poured it in a flask and opened it and drank it. And he's like, dude, we're in a fucking helicopter. You don't think I spell that? The best alone drinking you can ever do, in my opinion, now we're getting to the weeds on it, is alone behind someone's back. What do you mean? When they don't know you're drinking, but you're drinking. Like Christmas shopping. And your wife says, all right, let's all split up. And you go, cool. And it's like, it's like 11 o'clock on a Sunday. And they just opened that bar by the elevator in the Beverly center. And you just sneak over and you go, Hey man, can I get a double jack on the rocks, rocks, rocks? And they're like, sure. And you just have it. And you just go, let's just, and then you're off. And then you're like, yeah. And then you just little sneak one, sneak it, sneak it. And then you're buzzed and nobody knows. And then your wife's like, wait, have you been drinking? You're like, Yeah, I'm drinking by myself in a fucking mall on Christmas. How sad do you think I am? And then you go, yeah, I am."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "What about mood? Do you ever drink in a dark place?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "So I broke, I had a chick break up or a chick cheat on me. When I was when I came back from Russia and she's something my best friend and I didn't know how to deal with the emotions I had and my buddy Mike Osborne said I can tell you this if you drink they go away and I went okay and that was the first and kind of last time I ever did that because I did it I've done it I've done it a couple times but it I try to avoid, I try to avoid if there's a motion going to alcohol, like meaning, not when it's anxiety, but like depression. I kind of sit in the depression because, or anxiety, I lean towards alcohol, like anxiety, like about flying or, or, or just like getting worked up on over something. But with depression, I try to avoid alcohol and just sit in it. Um, because I, and because I've gone there before, I've, but anxiety is a, I land, I land all the time."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "But depression, heartbreak, all that, you just sit in the feeling."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah. Heartbreak is a weird one for me. So like the last time I got my heart broken at Leanne dumped me, um, we were dating for like four months and she broke up with me. And my instinct was to have a drink. My friends went to this, uh, this, uh, Middle Eastern restaurant and I told him what was going on. And my buddy of course like, let's get a cocktail. And I was like, I don't want one. I got to figure this out. Cause I want this chick. And if I start drinking, I'll be like, ah, fuck it. So I got to figure it out. Like I wonder, I'm going to find out my dad dies one day or my mom, but my dad will be the rough one. My mom will be equally as rough. My dad and I were really close. And I wonder if I've thought about this a lot. If I'll have a drink dealing with that. Like I think about that a lot. I keep saying everything I get with my dad is extra. My dad, my dad had a 100% blockage in his widowmaker twice and both times they saved his life and he got a stint, I think 12 or 13 years ago and then he just got a stint this last year. But so everything I get to do, I feel like it's extra. And so, you know, he was just at the premiere of my movie and he got to see that and he had a very emotional response. And I got, I got that from him. And I was like, that's a little ice on the cake. I did, you know, the arena in Tampa was the first time he ever saw me do stand up. That was like a little extra. So all these things I'm getting with them are all extra. So I have a, you know, at least 74. So yeah, that'll be a tough one. At the premiere, he was, what, proud? Yeah, he came out, he was sobbing, crying. And he goes, I've underestimated you your whole life. And I was like, what? And he was shaking. He goes, I just underestimated you. I didn't know. I didn't know you were this, I didn't know whatever. It was really hard to understand him to be honest with you. I don't know totally what he said. He might have just not liked the movie."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-3 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I think you, uh, we're hearing what you wanted to hear. Uh, would you learn about life from your father?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Uh, it's not going to make sense. I want to feel like sometimes I'm like a professional fucking wrestler because all I care about is you come and see me do stand up. So I, whatever I got to do to get you there, but the number one thing, my one takeaway from that man's humility and I applied, I've applied it in different ways throughout my career. On my 26th birthday, he gave me a really aggressive speech. He, I was hungover and I just thought he was going to say happy birthday. So I picked up the phone and I was like, Hey, and he was like, you are a tremendous piece of shit. And he broke me off. You have no humility. You have no this. You've never succeeded in anything. You're lying to yourself. You're lying to everyone around you. You're not doing what you're going after your dream. I broke you. I failed you as a father. This and that. I was like, I thought you're going to wish me happy birthday. And so in that speech, he told me if I wanted something, I had to go at it and I had to go after it as hard as I could. And I had to do whatever it could. I could do to achieve that. In this case, it was working, offering to do anything at the comedy club to get on stage. He told me, I told him, that's not how it works. And he said, no, that's how it works for some poor kid from Harlem. Because that kid needs it. He goes, you've grown up with privilege or life. You don't need it. You think you're going to be fine. And so I went and I ended up getting a job at the door, but I it was it was it was it's humbling. It's it's really like it makes me feel it made me feel uncomfortable. And so that humility is, it's the first time I really understood humility and I've applied that in many respects in like, in like getting to be a paid regular at the comedy store that happened late in life for me. And which I think most people would give up and be like, fuck that, I'm already a touring comic, I'm on TV, I don't need that. But it's something I wanted and I knew I wanted. So I just humbly went after it. And then I think I still apply it when it comes to selling tickets or selling a project to the fans. Or even to doing podcasts, I try to be as honest as I can about whatever I'm going through or whatever I'm dealing with. But when it comes to like selling things, I don't have a problem trying to make fun of myself or get in front of people so that they know that I have a show. Because the thing I'm good at, the one thing I know I'm good at, stand up. And I say that humbly, but like, I want them to come there. So like, I've heard people make fun of me like before they're like, yeah, I'm not some, I'm not some clown and a speedo who's one is going to, I'm a real comic. And I go, okay, but I want it. I want them to have my shows and you can be that guy and I'll be this guy."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah. The clown and the speedo."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah, it's like what are you gonna do? Funny people make fun of me for taking my shirt off like I guess behind my back. No one ever does it to me like no one would ever Comics aren't comics aren't comics aren't that manly Yeah, yeah, but I always go like I always go like who what do you care? What am I doing? What do you care?"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "And you love taking shirt off more than anything You know, when something becomes meme and becomes super popular, it becomes easy to not love the thing anymore, to get tired of it. You still love it?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "More than anything. I like being shirtless more than having a shirt. I'm very uncomfortable in a shirt. Like right now, and I have tactile issues, like I have legit tactile issues. I'm most comfortable in stretchy jeans with a loose fitting belt. And then these shirts exactly, but I like more like a v-neck. I can feel this on my neck right now, and I can feel it on my arms. And so I'll sit a certain way, because it just rubs me wrong. But you have more comfortable shirtless. I can never wear what you're wearing."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah, well, this is my shirtless. Each of us have to find our place in this world in terms of fashion."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I would love to be able to wear what you wear, because it looks good."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "It feels like an escape from convention, but you or me, both of us. Yeah. Cause this, nobody wears this unless you work security for somebody."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah, but it looks good on you. Does it? I don't know. You know, I think people think, I don't like, they would say like, what, what if you lose weight? You can't take your shirt off anymore. I go, no, I'm going to take my shirt off. You fucking out of your mind. I'm going to take my shirt off all the time."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "You mentioned early on heartbreak after the Russia trip with a girl who slept with your friend. Let's go back to Hemingway quotes. The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them. So to go all in with the trust. I love Hemingway so much. Have you been betrayed in your life? Yeah. What do you think about trust?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "It's an interesting question. Um, I've been betrayed in my professional life a couple of times by really close friends. And, uh, I'm not someone who can like, I have a mantra that, I mean, I'm, I don't know if people have heard it or not. And I hate, I hate sharing it, but it's, but it's true. The mantra is, so you think I'm weak. Like, do you think it's like, that's my thing. Cause I feel like people take advantage of me and I go, so you think I'm weak. You forget everyone that like, and I'm named the, the people that have betrayed me, I'm a larger man than all of them. And, and, but I, and so that's what really fucks with me is I go, so you think I'm weak. Like where I grew up when you do stuff, there was physical consequences. I grew up in Florida. Like I've been beaten up a bunch. I'm not saying I can fight, but like I'm not scared of getting beaten up. And the, the times that I've been betrayed, I, and, and even, I know, even like by Ari, whichever, people see that drugging as a betrayal. And I did for a period, but it was, it was only because it was Ari and he was my, one of my best friends. And me and him had to work through that. Cause I, I, I couldn't not love him. Like I couldn't not have him in my life. He met, he means a lot to me. He really does. He's a great friend to have. But he's also, I don't know what was going on with him at that time, but he made a bad decision and I had to forgive him for that because I knew he knew my mantra. I think I'm harder to trust people now. I'm not as apt to trust people at all. But there was a moment, I don't know if I've ever shared this and I don't know how this will sound, but there was a moment that information got leaked about a thing and all my managers and agents, both, both, Tom and our managers and agents would like to either separate us or one of them get both of us. It's just more lucrative for them. So they have always kind of pitted us against each other a little bit and they do it subtly. They'll do it to me and my team and then his team will do it to me and then my team will do it to him and his team will do it to him. And there was a moment where information got leaked about this thing I was doing And my team was like, just so you know, your, your boy Tommy is, is the rat. And I had to, it was the one time when Leanne said, do you think Tom would do that? I said, uh, I don't know how faith works. Like I'm not a super religious person, but I will tell you that I believe in Tom and I don't think he did it. And I will stand by that ignorantly. And, and I will, and I will ride or die with him because I cannot live in a world where I don't trust him. Yeah. If I don't trust him, then I am so fucked. And, uh, and it wasn't him. It wasn't him. And it was, it's a cool feeling to know that you could like, that you could blindly trust someone, blindly have faith in someone, know that they're, they have your best interest at heart. But yeah, it took me a while to get there. Rogan helped me get there because I wasn't trusting him or Joey or Tommy or anyone. I wasn't trusting anyone. I'd gotten in a, Bad thing and I just wasn't trusting anybody. And Rogan was like, yo man, we're trying to be your fucking friend. And I was like, yeah, I don't, I don't need friends. I couldn't understand why Rogan was interested in me. And I said to someone, I was like, is he gay? Like, what the fuck? And then he was just a nice guy. He was just a nice guy."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-4 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "That'd be hilarious if Joel was sexually attracted to you this whole time. This whole time is the reason he keeps inviting you back."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I would be more excited. I would be more excited if he tried to kiss me on the lips once. And just in a Scotty J way from Boogie Nights where he's like, what? Do you like my car?"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah. You know, nobody would believe that story. No one. Yeah."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "If I was Joe, I would kiss dudes all the time. And then when they didn't kiss back, you know, no one will ever believe you."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah. When you trust people like that and they fuck you over, that can really, really, really hurt."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "You end up on a treadmill in a hotel room fighting with them. You fight with them all the time. You fight with them all the time. You fight with them constantly. And I have this thing where I can ruminate on an idea, and I can't get it out of my head, and I hear the words they say."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "So all in your head, on a treadmill, in your head. Just fighting."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Just fucking fighting, and then, yeah. And then one day you get past it. One day you just go, eh, fuck him. I'm not gonna leave them real estate and then you just forget about them. And then they reach out and they'll try to be a dick or a bully because they're bullies. They're bullies is what they are. Don't ever forget it. They're fucking bullies and they got bullied. It's not their fault. They got bullied. And then they try to bully you and you don't have any connection anymore. And you're like, oh, you can go fuck yourself. You can actually go fuck yourself. You're not my boss. You're not my wife. You don't fuck me. You don't pay me. Get the fuck out of my life."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "But this kind of mantra of that you're not weak, You still want to be able to be fragile to the world and appear weak almost."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I am. I mean, that's the problem is I think I am pretty fucking weak. Like, I'm not the strongest dude out there. I have really thin skin. I get my feelings hurt all the time. Yeah. And so, but like, but it sucks when you watch like your friend see something in you that you go, or they go, fuck him. He's not paying attention. Fuck him. Let's just fuck him. Let's take his money. You know what, fuck him. He doesn't know what the fuck he's doing. Look, he's a drunk alcoholic and you go, oh no, bitch, I pay attention. Like I'm wide awake. I'm here. I'm working my ass off. You're not gonna fuck in."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Well, that's the tough thing about like you and Tom Segura. You're at the top of your game on top of the world, some of the most famous comics in the world. And you could see money start to creep in like business decisions. Yeah. I don't know. It's a tough, it's a tough place."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "It's really tough. It's really tough for, you know, especially as we're growing. And, and, uh, I'll tell you what it, I don't know how much I'm allowed to say, but I can tell you this. We had a business deal where feelings were getting involved and money was involved in that. And the money was causing the feelings. And one of us said, to the other person, our feelings are more important than the money. So let's just split the money. And it was really like a solid moment where both of us were like, that is how we should run this."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "That's the interesting things with bands. You have popular bands that split even. Even though it's clear that the contribution is not even. It's like there's a front man and all that kind of stuff, but it's ultimately the right thing to do to say, fuck you to the money for the most part and prioritize the feelings."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah, especially because I couldn't do it without him. He couldn't do it without me. We do it separately. We'll have guest bears on. Some will blow up. Some won't. You can never figure it out, but when we're together, it does well. And so we need each other for it to work. And we've, you know, like I said, we're on a handshake deal with two bears and no one likes that. But we're like, Hey, I mean, we, I don't like, I, to the point where I like, he'll call me and go, yo, we have a deal to do this for X amount. Are you in? And I go, yeah. I don't check the books. I don't need to. I don't, I don't, I know him. I just know him."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah. What do you love most about Tom Segura?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "We saw a gay couple one time. This is a good start. And there was one guy was in khakis and one guy was in jean shorts with a python around his neck. And Tom goes, if we were gay, which one would you be? I said, I'm fucking python. And he was like, yeah, I'm khaki. And I go, really? And he goes, yeah, that's why we work. And he goes, all relationships are for pythons and khakis. And I went, really? And he goes, look at you and Leanne. Who do you think you are? I go, I'm Python. And he goes, she's khaki. And he goes, me and push. I go, oh, she's Python. He goes, and I'm khaki. He goes, I'll always be khaki. And sometimes I'll have a relationship around the Python, but it's, I'm usually a khaki. And I was like, yeah, I am a little bit of a lunatic. I'll tell you the one moment that explains Me and him, the world will never see. It was just a great moment. We got stem cells with Rogan one weekend and one day. And I'd had surgery in my arm and I didn't want to do it. I was terrified. And Tom just said, just come out and meet up with us. Tom knew he was going to make me get them. And so I got them. And he, you know, Joe's there. And so we're just all talking. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And Tom can see that I'm spinning out a little bit. And I get in the car and Tom's got a Porsche. So we're like right next to each other. And I just want to feel if it's swollen and it is a little swollen because I just got an injection. And then in Tom's driving and he's got his hand on the thing. He just puts his hand on my arm and he goes, you're okay. He just, he was watching. He knows me so well that he knows that I'm spinning out of control. And he's like, you're okay. And then I was like, and I felt okay. I was like, you're right. I'm okay. What the fuck am I doing? My brain's that brain."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-5 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Man, that guy got so much love in him."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Dude, he does. He has, you know, he had a fantastic relationship with his dad. And I think whatever that dude did to create that dude, he hit it out of the fucking park because he has so much love that he doesn't need reciprocated like at all. Like he can just love And then he feels good for him to give and to like take care of someone. And like, you know, he started the whole birthday gift thing. Cause, and he didn't need to. He just was like, Hey man, I had this bike. I thought you'd like it. And then of course I've turned it into a fucking bit and now we're upside down. I'm 120 upside down on a fucking race car that we can't make our money back on."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I love it. Uh, what do you love most about Joe Rogan?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Oh, that dude. I could go on and on about Joe Rogan. Joe Rogan is the most selfless individual I've ever met. He doesn't care if he has you on the podcast. He wants you to be the funniest person in the room. He wants you to be the smartest person in the room. Let me tell you something. Joe Rogan is 10 times smarter and funnier than me. He wants you to shine He wants to put you over to his fans. That shit did not exist before he started doing his podcast. People didn't share you with their fans. No one was like, hey man, come on on the road with me. They brought you on the road because they wanted you to suck and they put you in bad scenarios. Joe Rogan wanted you to shine. He gave so many people Beautiful career gave them careers gave them Joe could have looked at his podcast as his thing. This is my thing I bring on these guys. I'm gonna be the funniest kind of fucking room. I know some guys that have done that It might be me. It might be time I talk over people and not listen really well. Joe did the opposite. Now look, I've tried to learn from Joe on my podcast and do the same. That guy, when you think about it, you name 10 of his friends, I bet eight of them are doing arenas right now. They're all doing theaters. All his friends do theaters. All his friends do theaters. He is, he is just, you know, I, he, and he will accept this compliment. I tried paying it to him, uh, in, in Austin when I was in Austin last night. Well, he's not gonna accept any compliments. I gave him a gift too and I said, hey, I need to show you. I can't just tell you this because it's gonna fall in deaf ears. I need to give you a minute so you have something so you know that I think about you and I'm grateful for having you in my life a lot for many reasons. I have more friends in my life because of you. He taught me how to trust people again. I have a career because of you. I have a major motion picture because of you. I do arenas. Because of you without you in my life a lot of these things maybe never would have happened I never would have told the machine on stage I wouldn't have gotten I wouldn't never started a podcast I wouldn't have three podcasts like I mean all these things are things He not just he didn't just take me to the water one time and give me a drink He he gave me a machete and he said this is how I get to the water You got to put your own path, but just give me your heads up. You can also use my path whenever you want I mean, he, he is the most selfless individual. He will go down in history as one of the 10 most important people in stand-up comedy without a doubt. He changed the game. It didn't exist like this before him. And, uh, and he won't accept that compliment. What was the gift you gave him? I can't tell you. Is it a dildo? He was a dildo, double-sided dildo. I go, Hey, when you get free time, can we scissor fuck each other?"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah. Uh, you're happily married, uh, for 19 years. So I think you're a good man to ask, how do you find love? How do you find, how do you date in order to find a love of your life, of a lifetime?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "This is going to sound. Off. But don't. Don't tie yourself down, meaning like, don't spend time. fucking with those little mini shrimp and peeling them every night when you know you're looking for a lobster. And so I think what happens with a lot of guys, they're so busy and just getting pussy and going from here to here to here. I was never that guy. I always wanted to find someone who understood me. I always wanted that. And so, granted, I haven't had sex with a lot of chicks, but that's And it's not by choice. I'm saying like maybe there was times I would have done it, but I know that I was always looking for someone to figure out to get me. And then I will say this, when you know, you know. When you know, you know. When you think there's, I can't imagine a life without this person. That that happened to me and I can only say my experiences I had Leanne I loved her and I and I didn't even realize it and the second she dumped me I went oh no no no no no oh I I don't get to live a great life without her she's the thing that's gonna give me a great life I knew it Undisputed I went for a run and she dumped me. I went to my shower. I cried. I went to Barnes and Noble. I bought men are from Venus women are from Mars I've watched Fight Club in my closet. Yeah, I didn't drink I drank a lot of Nyquil to sleep and then I went for a hike in Runyon Canyon I was running back down outpost by Ben Affleck's house and and the Sun was setting and I just said a God if you're listening Just give me this chick back. I'll never fuck it up. This is the one. I won't fuck it up. I won't cheat. I'm not going to be a bad dude. I want to have kids with her. I'll be there. I'll be a great fucking dude. I'll take her out on dates. Like, I'll love this chick. And I got home and she was in my room in a sundress. And I was like, oh, fuck you. I didn't know he was real. I was like, shit, man, give me like one more night. Let me get some strange tale real quick before I commit forever. But I think when you know, you know, this is so silly, but I follow that in business. Like when you know, you know, and like my assistants with us and someone goes, how did you, how do you find a good assistant? I go, when you know, you know, like people will show you who they are. Uh, I can tell you when I fell in love with my assistant, we were doing a TV show and, and, and we worked past dinner and all the dinner places were closed and he just said, Hey, I got like four meals. I didn't know which one you'd want. So I got four different meals for you. I ordered them. They're up in your room and just let me know whichever you want. I'll take care of the rest of them. Yeah. And I was like, oh, that dude thinks about other people before himself. He didn't even get himself dinner. He just got me four dinners. And I was like, fuck. I did the same thing with my social media manager. The way she was operating was I was like, I feel like she's thinking about me. And we connected on so many levels and so many levels, I could talk to her about things and ideas I had. And then I was like, okay, I want her. I want him. I want, I think you, I think it's gotta be that thing when you know, you know, and it can be so simple as like, like a personal trainer or like a jiu-jitsu class or like just where you go, oh, I'm connecting right now."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-6 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "But you have to allow yourself to notice that person."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I think you do. I mean, I think you have to put yourself out there and you have to be available for it. You know, that's the hardest part is just being available for it. Cause so many people just want to be busy just dating. I just want to have someone in my life. I don't want to be bored. I don't want to, what if I die alone? I don't want to, I like, just be available for it."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Uh, what is it? You said peeling the baby shrimp. Yeah. When you could be having a lobster. Lobster is still a lot of work, I have to say."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah, but, well, yeah, but it's lobster. This is a fucking baby shrimp. Or like, you ever get, so you ever get the ones in Brazil where you just go fucking, I'll eat the shell. I don't care anymore. When you're so fucking hungry, you just handful of lobster like it's popcorn, or maybe shrimp like it's popcorn. I've done that in Vietnam. I've done that where I just go, it's too much work."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "So when you're in it, what's the secret to successful marriage? What do women want, Burt Cresher?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Oh, fuck. I'm the wrong guy to answer that."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I think- How to make love to a woman by Burt Cresher."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "How do you make love to a woman? I'll tell you how I do it. I go down on her first. Make sure she has an orgasm. Yeah. And then I get my turn and that's over pretty quick. It's like a, it's like at your ears pierced. It doesn't feel a little prick and it's over. I, um, I don't know if I've done a great job at keeping her happy. I think I keep her interested. Like, I think I, I, I. I keep her occupied like I'm like a little bit of a rodeo clown like I don't know. I mean like I know we're happy right now. I know we're really happy But I don't know if I ever did As good a job as she did like she's always been Like, she's always been a gangster. Like, did everything. Just does everything. She does it all. She does everything. Like, fucking everything. And she loves it. She just does it. And then she shows love for you by taking care of you. And so, like, I have a lot of time just been this, like, almost, like, step-and-repeat husband where it's, like, I come in to take a picture, like, hey, Monday, Tuesday. I'm on the road Wednesday. Take care, guys. Or, like, travel channel. I'd live for two weeks at a time. I left for the movie for three months. So, like, I don't know that I've ever done a bang up job. I buy it, like I go, I remember one time I was just like, I don't cheat on her. I don't hit her. I don't yell at her. I'm a pretty good fighter. I'm a really good fighter. Like, like I'm good at like going like, Hey, we're on the same team."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Oh, you mean de-escalation."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I'm really good at like, I'm very self, I'm very accountable. I'm very self-correcting. Like if we're in a fight and she points something out and I go, oh, you're right. I go, fuck, you're right about that. You're right. You're totally right. Oh, in the moment. In the moment, I'm really good at that. And my wife's not. She's not a good apologizer. Like she needs to sleep on an apology. And then she can do it. I can apologize in the moment if I realize I'm wrong. And I'm really quick to find my fault. I look for my fault because I go, tell me what I did. Adversely as a parent, I have pulled my daughters aside and been like, yo, that wasn't you. That was mom. I'm giving you a heads up. Cause I don't want, cause I got really confused as a kid. Cause my dad always made sure I knew I was wrong. And sometimes I wasn't. And then as a kid, you're kind of fucked up. And you're like, well, how do I know if I'm wrong? And I think that raises, so I was really good with my girls going like, go, and then, and then parenting Georgia taught me a lot about self-correcting."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Self-correcting."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "What's that? My oldest. I'm only parented like my dad parented, like just like raise your voice, get up to here. That's it. No, that doesn't fuck this. How come the dogs don't have goddamn leashes on the colors on their necks? And so with Georgia, I had to learn through therapy that if the, if the, if the consequence is here and the highest it goes is here, then why the fuck wouldn't they lie and do everything? Cause they go, well, I know what it's like to hear, but if you can vary your consequence with a child, and find some conversation in it, then all of a sudden they're like, well, fuck. Well, I don't wanna lie, this does suck. I like this, I like where we talk. And he says, write a thousand words on why driving around your kids in a car, kids in a car is bad."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "So threaten extreme violence every once in a while, just to... Yeah, let him know the dog can fucking bite."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "The dog can bark the dog can bite, but if you pet him on his belly, it'll wag its tail. Yeah."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Uh, do you worry about being away too much? I mean, you're one of the most creative content pushers and creators out there. You're just constantly innovating, constantly putting stuff out there. But do you worry that pulls you away from like, uh, the mundane experience of life that can bring contentment and happiness?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah, I feel like sometimes it cannibalizes your real life, where you start going, you start thinking in promo videos, or you start looking at a vacation as a bit. We should go zip lining. Why don't you do, what shoes are you wearing? It can definitely cannibalize your life. My wife's really good at going like, no, like no phones. The girls are really good. The girls, when I started Instagramming stuff, they started saying stuff like, Dad hits mom. And I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, guys. They're like, no, put your phone away. Dad, dad and less boys. And I'm like, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-7 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah. What's, what are some secrets, words of wisdom you can say for how to be successful online and all the, everything you've learned. You're kind of like the, the Mr. Beast of comedy, just innovating constantly in terms of how to promote stuff, in terms of how to present stuff across the different social media and across YouTube, podcasts, all that stuff."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I think the number one thing is, don't be afraid to suck. No one sees the shit that sucks. Doesn't get views. You just gets forgotten. Yeah, gets forgotten. The good stuff they remember, and then that's all they bring up. The stuff that sucks just goes away, and they're like, oh yeah, did you do that? I don't even think I saw that. Fuck it, who cares? Yeah. You know, it's like, I watched, one of my favorite stories about this is a guy named Sean Patton. I was explaining Instagram stories to him and Ari and Mark Norman. And I was explaining that you can set now sell tickets on Instagram stories. It was a back when they swiped up instead of tap the button to swipe up. And they didn't understand it. And I said, let me show you. And I put up tickets for sale. And I said, you know, hey, guys, swipe up. And then I just showed him in 10 minutes. Look, there's not many people swiped up. There's 145 people. It's a lot of people to buy tickets for a fucking comedy club. And they were like, whoa. And they're like, what do you do stories about? I go, fucking anything. Who gives a shit? Just anything. And some things work, some things don't. And I watched Sean Patton, shout out to Sean Patton, try for about 15 minutes to do an Instagram story about his cup of tea. He was making cup of tea and he was making and he kept going, hey, okay, hold on, hold on. I was filming him from the couch. I was filming all these. The whole thing. Yeah. I filmed every single one of my like 15 different stories of him trying to do that. I had 145,000 views on each story. He never posted it. He never posted it. And I was like, I was like, man, if he had just posted that one, he never posted anything in his stories. That one, 145, 5,000 people would have gone to his story to see that cup of tea being made and see which one he finally went with. And so sometimes I think the biggest mistake you can make is just not doing it. Just do it. Just post it. Turn the camera on. The idea will show up. And that's the number one thing. Just turn the camera on and it'll come up. You'll figure it out."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Do you do multiple takes or no?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Maybe I do three like and I'm talking even like in the dance video I did where I did the hip-hop dance. I did two takes on that With what I had the marching band come to my house. I did two takes on that Once you start doing more takes you lose the fun of it. I think and and then the fun ones I mean my favorite one I've ever done without a doubt my favorite promo I've ever done is I needed they added a second show in some city and, uh, and, and they added a second show like Friday and Saturday and our third show. And I said, I, they just told me, I was like, fuck, I'm leaving like tomorrow. I need to sell tickets. So I said, real quick, girls meet me outside and lands like girls are doing homework. I go to take five seconds. I put on a speedo. I got the American flag. I gave Isla the hose. I gave land the leaf blower and I gave Georgia the drone. And I just had Georgia drone it back to reveal the leaf blower and the mist you were seeing was coming from Isla and Leanne. I'm going to speed it with American flag. I have Bob Seager playing rambling, gremlin man. And that night, Larry, the cable guy texted me and he goes, this is fucking genius. And I was like, it was just, and it was just like, yo, just let's just shoot something. Who gives a fuck? like just shoot something just just just say something and and and put a little just do a little movement into it and and those are my back and that was I used to be I watched a bunch of my promo clips back from back in the day I used to be really good now it's like I'm promoting so fucking many things I'm just like I'm almost like I'm exhausted my promotions yeah because you know the the wall can dry up in terms of ideas Yeah. And it's like, how many times am I going to show a picture of my ass? My ass sells really good. Whatever my ass is on Instagram, fucking million views guaranteed. A million views. Your ass. And it's an active post. Like people are like, I did the best one I did the other day was where I superimposed my ass on my front and it just looked beautiful. No views. Oh, so you got reported. Oh, I see. It looked like a front vagina."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Oh, is that what it was?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah, I think so, but like, but yeah, my ass, like I'm at a place right now where I am promoting. I'll be promoting this movie. I'll be promoting this movie until it goes to a streamer. I'll be promoting it shamelessly. I'm proud of it. I had a great time shooting it. It's in theaters. It'll be on video on demand. It'll be on a streamer. I'm sure I don't know, but I'm sure I'm promoting fully loaded my summer festival with 19 different comics. I'm promoting the tops off world tour That starts again this fall. I'm promoting my cruise the fully loaded cruise. I'm promoting red rocks. I'm promoting so many things That today was the very first time in my career Where I said in January, I'm gonna take a break. I'm gonna take a break and go like Hey man, let's get your resting heart rate down. Let's get some sleep. Let's maybe take off like three months from drinking. Let's just really slow it down and also not think, when you're thinking in promo all the time, it can be a little exhausting. I mean, you think it's exhausting to look at my feet. It's exhausting to be my feet. I'm my feet."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-8 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "That's not as less as more. One of the things that, one of the things that inspires me about Rogan, for example, is he almost never does this kind of stuff."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah. Yeah. And how suddenly does this podcast? Cause you're right, less is more. What does he do it like once a month? No, he does it three times a fucking week."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "More is perfect. But for example, when he does like a story or something like this, he does one take. It's kind of shitty."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "It's the same. It's the same. It's elk with a bunch of jalapenos, a knife that he had sent to him by a fucking knife maker, and him going, look at this. Look at this, Traeger Smoker. I reverse seared this. This is what's great. Look at this. I'm about to put it in the butter. This is grass-fed butter. This elk really raises my testosterone. Rogan is, you're right. With guys like Rogan, when he does do a story, they're a little precious."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah. And I don't think he's ever done a second take of those stories. No. You have to really admire that. If the shot is framed poorly, if the audio sucks, it doesn't matter."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Do you remember when he... This is like, I can get on the weeds on Rogan, and especially when it's Instagram. Do you remember when he got his polar plunge and he couldn't sit it in a minute, and then the next day, and then he must have gotten it on the internet bad. He must have gotten it bad. The next day, he sat in for 20 minutes and he lowered his core temperature by like two degrees and it took him like a month to get that back. That is that fucking man. What an interesting, you know, I told you at the beginning, we were just talking. I like, I really enjoy, I draw inspiration for men I'm not like. You, David Goggins, Cam Haynes. Andrew Huberman, we're talking. Huberman, I love fucking, I mean, there's so many guys like that, Rogan, you know, Tim Kennedy. Like there are a lot of guys that are like just very different men than me and I love Jocko Wilnick. Like I love, I love reading their stuff or listening to their audio books or listening to their podcasts because I'm so not like that. But that took for me when I add a little bit of that in my life. Like I remember you went, I don't know what you were doing, but you were walking us through your day. And it was so fascinating. It was like, it was like, I ran eight miles today. I listened to an audio book. I was running eight miles and then I came and I worked for about three hours straight on AI stuff. And I'm like, and I was like, wait, you sat at a desk? Like you like sat at a desk and like, and I actually, I wouldn't even know what to do. I would start doing crafts. I was like, is your computer?"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Have you set for four hours focused on a single task? Me?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "No. Oh, I'm sleeping for four hours. I don't have a brain that... I really admired it when I listened to you do it because then you were like, You were talking, you were fasting at the time, you were doing your fast and then you talk about what you ate. And I was jealous. I wanted to be able to be like that. And I think at that time we started, I think you were doing maybe bone broth or something. And we started doing bone broth pretty religiously and adding that into a fast. Cause I was like, it does for someone like me, it does feel cool to add a little bit of control into life."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "So integrating a little bit of a way of being from another person that you're not like,"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah, like, so David Goggins is consistently pushing himself. I love. I did it over the pandemic more, but I love to go in. Today, I'm running a marathon. I'm going to get on the treadmill, and it's not going to be all at once, but I'm going to get through a marathon today. So let's get up, get up at 6 o'clock for some coffee, and let's see if we can do like five miles, and then know that we started there. And that was really fun. Cam Haines does that too, where he goes like, He almost just sets the limit and then achieves that. His son Truett is really fascinating because his son Truett's right now is trying to get the, and I bet people would never think that this is who I watch, but I get real inspiration from those people because I showed Jaco, I showed a clip to Jaco to Isla because Isla's like me, like a person of her fluids, impulse. I walked in on her one time. She was in the pantry in a bathrobe in the dark drinking a root beer. Yeah. And I opened the door and she went, I said, what? She goes, I thought you were a mom. Shut the door. And I shut the door to let her finish the root beer. Yeah. She has a hard time waking up. So I go, I look, come in here. I want you to see this clip from Jaco. She goes, who's Jaco? I say, he's a Navy SEAL. She goes, he works at the zoo. I went, no. He said, Navy fucking SEAL. I go, it's a badass job. She goes, it's a silly name. And I went, no, it's not. It isn't a silly name. These guys are the toughest dudes in the world."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "She goes, she's kind of right though about the silly name. I never even realized that."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Well, yeah, you talk to a child. Yeah. And so I go, watch this, what he says about waking up. So it hits the thing and Jaco goes, first thing you do when you hear that alarm clock, you could roll over, you could go back to bed, you could hit snooze, but you get out of bed and that's your first victory. And Isla hits pause and she goes, How great is that nap right after you hit snooze though? It is pretty fun. You're missing the point. He's with Casey Neistat when he's telling the speech. He's with Casey Neistat. And uh, so I hit it and then he goes and then you've got a victory under your belt. Then you go to the gym and you work out and I go, you listen to this island and she goes, yeah. And he goes, and then when you go to the work, now you've got two victories. You've worked out and you've woken up on time. You didn't hit that snooze button. So when you go into that break room and you see Donuts and she hit the pause, she goes, um, if he's about to say no to donuts, I'm done listening. I was definitely going to say no to donuts. Do you think he's going to have a donut? And she goes, You like this guy, I go, I fucking love him. And she goes, do you think he'd like you? And I go, what do you mean? She goes, dad, you hit snooze, you skip working out and you love donuts. And I'm like, yeah, you're making a good fucking point. I go, I, but I, but I do love that. Like I love to watch that brain work and go like, Like I don't, I don't hit snooze. Like I don't hit snooze now. I go, fuck it. Cause I'm up. But I, and then, and then I go to the gym every single morning. I go to the gym every single morning. And today is national donut day. I didn't have a donut. And so like, I, I, like, I try, I like try to apply these a little bit. Cause I, I mean, the other side of me is like, tonight, after we do this, I'll do another podcast and then I'm going to call Leanne and go, yo, we're in Beverly Hills. Meet me out here. Let's go have drinks. Let's go have a fucking couple of compari spritz. I was over at a friend's house and overnight. Let's get some edibles and let's fucking have a night about it. Get some sushi. Go have sex in the hot tub. And I got to work out at fucking 10 in the morning."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-9 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I got to tell you that nap when you press news is the sweetest. That's that's my victory. First victory is pressing snooze and getting the nap onto the belt."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Have you ever had, I had, so this morning I didn't work out. I'd press it like five in the morning until about six. You're going hard right now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I had a podcast. I saw you flew to Austin."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I was like, what? Yeah. What? Just run around theaters and now you're back."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah, run around theaters to do, to promote the movie. And then look, you only get one shot at these movies. So you might as well do it. And look, it's really hard to get people to go into a movie theater right now. And so I woke up at like six, five or six to seven, did press and then I went And I said, I'm really into a podcast, a history podcast right now. And I was listening to this one about the conquistadors and I was, and I was like, before when I woke up, I was like, I wouldn't mind going back to that. And I said, I'll tell you what, I'm going to take a little nap and go. Now I slept good last night. I slept like seven hours last night. Boy, that 30 minute nap, it felt like five hours. And I woke up going. I gotta readjust my sleep score. That has to be in the 97. That's the best fucking nap. Those little snooze naps are monsters."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "You know, there's, I don't care. That's probably for me, one of the peak experiences of life is those naps. I don't know what that is. Have you ever slept in a tour bus? A tour bus versus a regular bus?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Like a tour bus, like meaning like in a bunk."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "No. I've taken a lot of buses in my life though. You mean like just like a Greyhound?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Greyhound. Those are very different."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Where people pick your pocket. Listen, Dave. That's just part of life and a Greyhound."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I was on the Greyhound one time. I was on the Greyhound one time, right, when Notorious B.I.G.' 's album came out in college. And I was going from Tallahassee down to Tampa. And the dude got on the bus next to me, black dude. And he sat down, he said, Where you headed? And I said Tampa. He said, you grew up in Tampa? I said, yeah. I said, you and he goes, yeah. I said, you go to school with fam. And because of what fam, you and Florida say, the two schools, one's black, one's white. And he goes, no, I just got a prison. I said, you got a prison? And he goes, yeah. Yeah, man. I got out of prison. I stabbed a dude and I've been in prison. I just got out today. He goes, what are you listening to? I said, notorious B.I.G. And he goes, oh, shit. That's out and I went, yeah. And he goes, I want to hear it. Can I hear it? And I was like, yeah. And he used my headset to the whole bus ride to Tampa. I didn't have the, I was like, he's tapped a man. They're yours now. And then I just sat next to him and I was like, is it, are you enjoying it? He's like, this is good. No tour bus snaps."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "When you're in a bunk. It's ice cold bus isn't moving five o'clock. You got like we work out from like up until like five o'clock five thirty show starts at seven but that five o'clock to six six thirty nap It's pitch black it's like a coffin and it is ice cold and you got all your pillows and blankets in there and you put a little history podcast on in the corner and you just listen to like Kurt Mombashi or like, oh my God."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "So you're talking about like five, six PM for a seven PM show."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Oh, it's the best nap you'll ever have. You wake up so refreshed. Yeah. Like I've woken up from naps, like where I'm like, fuck yeah. Like those tour bus naps are the best naps."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I think having a full productive day. Mm hmm. And then like 5, 6 p.m. You do a nap and then you do something really stressful after that like really hyper like like a show But if I do like I really like doing podcasts like late at night after a nap"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I think I fucked up my podcast rhythm because we're doing them in the day. Yeah. And so sometimes I'm just like, like if I work out the morning, I'm good on a podcast, but if I don't work out, I suck on a podcast. I'm just like, uh-huh. Yeah. Yeah. That's cool. No, I, I'm, my favorite is, I used to do this a lot. I haven't done it in a while is, Full busy day, nap at home, box of wine on the treadmill, and do that until like midnight. Watching TV, box of wine."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Box of wine on a treadmill. It's the best. How are you sipping it, Jake?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "You have a glass but you have a box the box fits on the corner in the treadmill So you just got a little spigot. Yeah, and you sit there and just put on like guys grocery games or like just something It's like a you walking or are you running? I walk I walk like a three five So what will happen is if you started three started three casual walk 20 minutes again a mile in and then you and you're gonna feel loose get up to a three five You can do seven miles on these things and just, and just, and you're just enjoying your night. And especially like my wife, back in the day when we lived in our old house, my wife would come into the man cave and she'd sit on the couch and we watched TV together and like watch Game of Thrones. And you just like for an hour and you just get on the treadmill and do it. Oh man, I, I loved having done that as much lately. Cause that was the fucking thing."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-10 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "You can lose yourself. You can forget yourself."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "You forget you're on a treadmill and you just start like walking and you're sweating and you're, and you're having wine and then certain points you're like, Like, uh, you, like, you, you start jogging, especially like we were watching, uh, not all quiet on the rest in front. What's the one where they've got to, they've got to get the message to the front line. I would run like I was in World War two. I would run when they would run and it was fucking awesome. And I would be like, cause they were doing drinks. They'd be like, take a drink. You got to run up there and be like, okay. Yeah. I'm really into, I'm really into history podcasts right now. Like I've been in them for a while. 20th century or everything? Everything. Everything. I listened to, uh, uh, was it Marcus Aurelius and Cleopatra today? Uh, in the middle of the podcast, they're like, you know, just, you know, Cleopatra wasn't as hot as everyone says. I was like, why are you saying that? Yeah. Tell me she's a six. She looked like Snooki. Yeah. Like, let me, let me dream that she looked like Kim Kardashian. Yeah. And then I listened to that one today."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I listened to World War II a lot. Oh. A lot of books on World War II, a lot of podcasts about it."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "What's your favorite theater, the Pacific or European?"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "No, European. Pacific, well, because my family's so much of it has died in that theater. Dude, so much of it. I hate to sound cliche, like I'm Arnold Schwarzenegger in an 80s movie, but it's personal."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Well, you know what I find funny about that? Yeah. Is Lenin, It was Lennon, right? John Lennon? No, no, no. Lennon was World War II, right? Or was it Stalin? Stalin. Stalin thought him and Hitler would be friends. Yeah. I think that's so cute that he was like, we're going to be buddies. Yeah. Like we're boys. Yeah. And then Hitler's like, oh, fuck you. I'm Hitler, bro. This is what I do."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Well, at first he was like, fuck yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll be friends."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah, yeah, sure, sure. And then call me, call me. Better yet, I'll show up and win her. How's that sound? Yeah. That, uh, that, uh, I find that I find all of that so fascinating. When I was a kid, I had a hard time understanding how, cause we were always at war with Russia when I was a kid and I had a hard time understanding how we could be on the same team as Russia in World War two. And I was like, wait, how did that turn south? And then you, this is a podcast. Yeah. I'm, I'm that all of that, all of that, like, All of the World War II, I got really into the Pacific shit for a while, but I'm really deep in the, in the whole, we went to Normandy from the Cliffs of Dover and to think, so that's the fucking beach. That's the fucking beach. Oh shit, this is cold as fuck. These dudes jumped in ice cold water. And this isn't like a cool beach, like this is, And it's just so insane to, and then to see like the, it's pretty intense. I don't know why I got into history late in life. I wasn't, I was kind of into it, but I'm really into it now. And I love just learning a little something about, you know, today was, I listened to like the Noiser has a great history stuff. It's like history for dummies, I think. Like I get, I can't listen to the really smart stuff. It starts losing me. Too many names that I'm gone."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah. Well, Dan Carlin is always the best."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Your podcast with Dan Carlin was so fucking good. He is. He is. I mean, I only know about Martin Luther because of Dan Carlin. I only know. Like I would have, I made a joke about some Lutheran the other day. And everyone laughed and I was like, did you guys listen to the same podcast? I did because I just am quoting Dan Carlin. I that his podcast, I mean, we all quoted the same shit about Genghis Khan about how he could shoot a dove off a horseback. But we knew that all four hoofs had to be off the ground at the same time they shot. They would sometimes take their meat and stick it under their saddles. And that, I mean, Dan Carlin is He is the motherfucker. Yeah. God, those were ma'am discovering podcasts was the coolest time of my life."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "And the interesting thing about him is, is audio. And so it's the voice. So for me, I mean, everybody has a story with a prostitute in a motel. Dan Carlin was my prostitute in the motel. I invited him to a motel. I don't even remember in the middle of nowhere. He shows up with that voice and the rest, the rest is history. Things they will never know what happened. Oh boy, did he like, no, I'm just kidding. I'm really running with it. Yes, we did we got along with it. I mean, he's an incredibly kind and thoughtful person constantly self-critical thinking he's not good enough He just works on those episodes forever forever and he just thinks that there's these just like with Goggins. There's these other historians That I think like way on him like they're going to judge him or something like this in his mind I talked about I talked to it with them, but Daniel Patelli and I guess"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "His thing is, I guess his hang-up is, Carlin's is, he's not like this, he doesn't feel like he's a real historian, but he is. I mean, it's the way he shares the story. Look, we had a history teacher in seventh grade who was a con artist, and he came and taught her seventh grade, and it was a total con artist. All he taught us about was barnstorming, barnstorming and the JFK assassination. I walked away having such an appreciation for barnstorming, a very small blip on Americana. But I know a lot about barnstorming because of this guy and he, because he was passionate about barnstorming. It was the funniest seventh grade history class I've ever taken my entire life."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-11 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Uh, you mentioned tour bus. Uh, what's the best road trip you've been on? Have you, have you driven across the country?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Just you know, we had one road trip in college. where a bar had burned down and we found out that the alcohol was still in the bar. So we took my Jetta over to the bar and we emptied out the bar of all the burnt up liquor. We didn't know what anything was. We threw it into the trunk with no clothes, like no clothes. And we said, let's just start driving. And we drove from Tallahassee and ended up in West Virginia and just drove. Just drove. It was like five dudes. We drank. One person drove. I wasn't a big drinker. And this sounds kind of crazy. I wasn't a big drinker in college until I went to Russia. And so I drove the majority of the way and then we get somewhere. and we'd get a hotel room. And it was one of the most epic fucking weekends of just debauchery and chaos. And I think we took mushrooms and we went down a river in tubes."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "So it's mostly about the bond between the five people versus like throwing yourself into Meeting like strangers and this kind of stuff."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah, and it was when it was when I was like I was trying to be a poet at that time and so like we were actual poetry Yeah, it's really bad part of my life. I was just we were like is like music is there too somewhere Yeah, I tried to be in a band too that didn't work out the way I wanted it to I just was never I always was I was never the I'm not a good serious person Like I'm a good funny person. I'm good to be the fool, but I'm not good when I try to be serious It looks foolish And so even like, you know, someone said, showed me throwing out the first pitch the other day as something and all I could see is my gut flying everywhere. And I was like, that's why it went viral. I was like, fuck, I thought it was my throwing style. That was a pretty epic one. The best road trips I ever took was during the pandemic. During the pandemic when we were, when we would, we were doing that drive-in movie theater tour. I created a drive-in movie theater tour when no one was working. And the very first one, no one had left our houses. We all went to my house. We got my tour bus. The day the tour bus showed up, we just wrapped the cabin. Just wrapped doing the cabin on Netflix and we got COVID tested We got in the tour bus and we said let's create our bubble and stay safe and that night we drove I think just outside Gallop and we stayed in a No one had been outside and we stayed at a KOA camp on arrival and we watched thunderstorms come in on a lake and we were all smoking cigars and drinking IPAs and it was fucking mad and that whole road trip. We rode tripped across the country to start the tours. And then we just and we were outside for the first time when we were and it was that period of my life. I'm so grateful. I didn't make a ton of money because we had a big crew and I made sure I was trying to make sure everyone because no one had paid bills in a while. But that fucking tour was the funnest. We took up pickleball. We took up disc golf. Everything was wide open in the middle of the country. You could do things, but we were still in our bubble. And we lived in that tour bus. And at night, we just get back in the tour bus by ourselves and get fucking wasted. And I mean, that fucking run, it'll nothing will ever be like that."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah, because you like rediscovered the humanity, the camaraderie, because the pandemic kind of killed that. It suffocated us from like their basic connection."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah. And there was this You always had an anxiety attack halfway through that you got COVID. This one, you know, COVID was killing people and you were like, I know I've got COVID. And then, and then we'd come in to Sedona. You know, this was also why I didn't make a ton of money. We'd come into Sedona and we'd get a house in Sedona for five days at Airbnb. And we'd all isolate there before we went home to our families. I remember the first time we did it, we didn't isolate. We just pulled back into LA and all our families were freaked out. So I had to stay but live on the tour bus at a different house. And it was 4th of July and I came in and they were doing an egg toss. And they were like, well, you can do an egg toss. This is not about my anxiety guys. You can do an egg toss with your daughter Isla. So Isla and I did an egg toss and we fucking got it to like legit like 40 fucking feet where I was throwing overhand lobbing them to her. And the egg cracked in her hands and it broke over her face and I got in bed that night high on weed. fucking drunk and I went, what if I gave my daughter COVID from an egg toss? I go, that would be the most horrific way to kill a child. Yeah, she got it from an egg toss. It broke in her face. Her dad did COVID."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-12 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah. I mean, that's the scariest thing about COVID, I think, is not you dying, but because of you, somebody else dies. Oh, I got it. That's the fear, I think, that really Like took hold on people. That's why they're they were way more cautious than perhaps they needed to be just like I don't want to be the guy that's responsible for killing somebody I love or somebody that somebody else loves But Leanne gave everyone in our family covered She came up to me and she gave me a hug."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah after Christmas And gives me a hug and I said what's the matter she goes I think I have covid I go bitch yeah fuck you doing yeah back it up Fauci like fucking and then she we went when we went all. And then and then she had it and it went away and we're all fine and we're like okay what we still go to park city so we all go to park city then georgia gets covered. And then Georgia starts crying, and she goes, I think I gave you COVID. And I was like, I'm fine. She goes, you're at high risk. And I'm like, what? She's like, you're a fat alcoholic. I'm like, whoa, easy. Where the fuck? What about feelings? And then Georgia got COVID. Me and I live, we're still in Park City. Leanne had it. My tour bus came up, picked George up. George and Leanne took him back to LA. And I was, I don't know that we're there. And I tested and then we get on the plane and I cough and Isla's got her mask on and Isla just looks at me, you know, the best. The one thing we miss are the eyes of her masks. And then we get home and I had COVID and Isla's like, if you gave me fucking COVID and then she never got COVID, she never got COVID."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "You mentioned IPAs. What's the lay of the land of great beers in this expansive world of ours?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I like Pilsners. I'm a Pilsner guy. I'm an ice cold beer guy."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Ice cold Pilsner."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I like an ice cold beer. I like an ice cold. One of the best beer buzzes I ever had is we had bought a new house, but we weren't building it. And over COVID, I didn't drink for like three months, four months. until we decided to go back out on tour and we figured that out. And I was in the backyard and Leanne came back with like two tall boy German Pilsners and cracked them. She goes, this type of beer. And I was like, fuck yeah. And man, that second that beer buzz is different than anything. Cause the second it, it touches you, you feel the sparkle and you're just like, Yeah, baby. I'm back. And then she's like, you want another one? I'm like, fuck yeah. And then we have another one. And then, and that beer buzz is especially afternoon beer buzz is just so pretty. It's different than a night beer buzz. A night beer buzz is like, oh, I guess we'll have a beer and then I'm a couple. I gotta go to work tomorrow. All right. But that afternoon, irresponsible beer buzz. Yeah. Pilsner. Pilsner, there's, I don't mind an IPA, but it's gotta be at, it's gotta, I gotta be at somewhere. I gotta be at somewhere. They gotta have an IP, like I like a local IPA. It's gotta be food involved. And then I'm enjoying an IPA. I threw up an IPA in a bathtub in Salt Lake City one time. It was bad."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "What do you mean? Oh, you threw up in the bathtub. Okay."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "No, no, no. I was drinking in the bathtub."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Like bathtub with some water in it or? No, no, no, no, no. You're sitting in the bathtub?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "No, I'm getting ready to take a shower. And I had a growler of IPA. Yeah. It's about six in the morning. Yeah. I have to fly that day to Vegas to jump off the stratosphere. Yeah. All I need is a little bit of a buzz to get myself on this fucking plane. Yeah. I have anxiety going through my fucking head because I'm gonna be the first person to jump off the stratosphere. And so I'm drinking an IPA out of a growler in a bathtub at six in the morning. And it just didn't sit right. And I threw it up and I was off IPAs for like 10 fucking years. I didn't have another IPA until I was like 46, because I was like, all I could think about was throwing up that IPA in a bathtub in a shower and being like, I'm gonna throw up thinking about it. But yeah, I don't, I didn't fuck with IPAs for a while. And then during the pandemic, I got it, I got back into IPAs."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I was that way with Jack and Coke, Jack Daniels and Coke. Really? Got so drunk many, many years ago that just couldn't look at it for a few years."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I can't touch. What's Janice Joplin's drink? Southern Comfort. I can't say Southern Comfort."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "She just drank it straight? Well, Southern Comfort, is that 40%? That's hard."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "No, it's almost like a liqueur. Honestly, it's really sweet. Jack, double Jack on the rocks, lots of rocks. I had a quote that, I got a video that went viral about, I'll never quit drinking. And I have not gotten on a plane since that without having a flight attendant not even ask what I want. Walk up with a double jack on the rocks, lots of rocks. I mean, it happens. So on times I don't want to drink. Yeah. I flew to Austin the other day. I was like, I'm not drinking on the plane because I felt sick. Yeah. And man, he walked up and he goes double jack on the rocks, lots of rocks. I was like, fuck, you know it. Yeah. But yeah, that's, that's my drink. Uh, uh, wait, what's your drink? I thought you'd be a vodka guy."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-13 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Well, vodka I associate with a lot of moments in my life of happiness because vodka is associated with shots and camaraderie. And there's Eastern Europe in general. A bunch of guys get together. and you celebrate life intensely. People fight, people just feel, people experience life in a deep way, just get too drunk for like for a reason. But I don't see that as like drinking, drinking. That's like a journey towards a destination. To me, drinking is like whiskey neat. or beer, like you said, ice cold beer. This is that afternoon beer, like for a person like me who's extremely regimented and disciplined, sometimes you get the situation. I just remember, I mean, just, I remember there's a bar at MIT where I just remember in the afternoon, there was like a business meeting and I sat down, we just started with a beer and they were like really crisply cold. Some kind of lager and then just one beer and two beers and all of a sudden you say fuck it Let's just the rest of the day. This is what this is and you said bright like you just like and nature is beautiful out there and you just said fuck it to all the meetings fuck it to everything else just the camaraderie, the just talking about life, being silly, being, you know, all of that."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "See that, see, you're describing something I'll never get, because I'm not regimented. I would love, I would love. I would love only for the moment that you get to have, you get the most precious little angels breath that anyone's gonna get because you live this life that's dialed in and it's scheduled. And so when you say, fuck it, it's like, that's like me doing coke. Like it's like, oh, fuck it. And you can just do that with beer. That is fucking amazing. I would love to live a regimented life just to get the chance to go Hey guys, I'm not performing surgery today. Fuck it. Hey guys, this bus full of kids, kids gotta drive itself home. Fuck it. I couldn't even, I couldn't even tell you. You know what's so interesting about me and you is like, you know, I'm a fan of yours. I couldn't even, I don't really know what AI is like other than like dildos or AI, right? Like,"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Like if I had some electronics in it. No, I don't think a dildo classifies this a robot."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Cause I thought that's how they were going to take over fucking mankind. Well, they start with these, the fucking womanizer that knows how to eat a pussy. And then they're like, we don't need men anymore. But like, it's so interesting that I couldn't even, like I can barely tell you what my dad does for a living. He's a lawyer. I could kind of, like he's called me and say, Hey man, you got to stop talking about what I do. Cause you're not doing it right. I go, what do you mean? He's like, whatever you're saying I do, I don't do. And so, but like, I couldn't even begin to explain your job to my daughter."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Well, I think there's the way you do the job, which is the way you experience life that I've regimented, just even just a 95 job, right?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Do you work 95?"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "No, but I work much more than that. Yeah. But there's no. Every kind of lifestyle has its complexities. I think nine to five means you have to wake up at a certain time every day."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Do people tell you to pull it back and then like, hey, you're working too hard?"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah, a lot of people. What I want in my life, what I love in my life, especially people close to me are the ones that say work harder. Because everybody- How do you get them? How do you get them? I don't have anyone in my life that does that. Everybody's always worried about me."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Everyone's worried about me. Everyone's always worried about me. The only thing, no one ever says, if I showed you my DMs right now on my texts, all it is is like, hey man, I'm worried about you. Like Joe, I love Joe to death. Not once has he, he always, I don't know if you've seen the caring Joe eyes where like I'm worried about you, where it's like, And you're like, man, don't do that. And he's like, I'm worried about you. And you're like, don't fucking worry about me. I'm working. I'm just working. I love working. I love what I do. I love what I do. I can only imagine that you love what you do as much as I love what I do, because that's all I ever want to think about. It's all I ever want to talk about. It's all I ever want to be like, when my wife wants me to take August and whatever the August whatever the fuck September that's no, but like July and August off after we do fully loaded and I Was like no I was like what do you mean? Like we're so like well just what am I like sitting a chair and stuff? No, you can do like take up a hobby. I go writing jokes Can I get on stage? Can I do sets in the city because I'm not gonna fucking you? Do you want me to like like I don't understand what I don't understand people who don't I don't understand people don't don't have the drive to work and all the time, I don't understand that. I envy it. I envy it because I go, I would love to just be like, I'm going to play video games. I can't play a video game. If I did, I'll be on Twitch trying to make money. Like I love how do you find somebody who goes, you need to work harder."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-14 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah. Especially when they see like, I don't know what you look like, but I look tormented when I'm working very hard. Like it means Like it's easy to worry for my well-being. It's not like I'm happy go lucky, but I'm happy underneath it."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "My working too hard is like on a plane every other day or every day getting up at six working out and then going into like two in the morning or one in the morning and then going to sleep and then getting up at six working out getting on a plane going to another place. Like that's what my working is just a lot of travel in mind. If I didn't drink on planes, I don't think anyone would probably worry about me at all. They'd be like, no, you're doing great."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "But the working out is there. So I got to ask you, because you and I seem to have a similar relationship with running. I like this idea of slow treadmill. I like running slow. Yeah. You know, like a 10 minute mile or something like this. I'll just run forever. Just listen to an audio book, listen to brown noise. Think. I love it. What's brown noise? It's actually brownian noise, but short brown noise. It's kind of like white noise, but deeper. So it's just noise like that. Oh, wow. It kind of sounds like a waterfall. And I'll just listen to it and something happens to me. I think there's, you can ask Kuberman about this. I don't, but apparently there's some science that kind of focuses the mind and so on."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "It's funny because I think sometimes people don't get about running as they go, They get on and they put it on like a six right away on like a treadmill and they go, I can't do this for fucking 30 minutes. But you can if you build yourself up to your six and you play games. I play games with myself a lot. Like I'll play games where I go. Um, and I can do this. I can do this. I can do this almost not all day long, but I can do this a lot longer. Like I did it for two hours the other day before my workout or no hour and a half before my workout where I started at 3.5 walking. And then I, and then I get my jog up to like a five and then I'm like 5.5. Then I go six. And then I go, and once I'm at a six, my body's really loose. And so then I go, all right, bring it down to a 3.5. And then I go punch it to a 7.5 for a quarter of a mile. And then let's walk at a four, let's jog at a five. I can do that. I love, they're called a fartlets, I think. And I love those like where it's like, it's, Regiment and running and sprinting at certain levels. I love that and I love also when I work out to listen to music but put on foreign language cooking shows on Netflix Can you explain that they just put it on mute? You don't need to hear it for some reason. They're sexier the way they're shot. They're sexier. Yeah, and it's like Street food Asia, and they're just watching them make street food in Asia. There's one called broth. It's called broth the nation of broth and they're just making broths and you're like Fuck I want some broth."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "So this is South America. This is Asia South America Asia"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "They do one on pizzas. I've watched this one on pizzas. I've watched it. There's like four episodes. I've watched every episode so many times that my trainer goes, God, that's that fucking, I could watch that again. I love watching foreign language cooking shows on mute when I work out."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "While blasting music. While blasting hip hop. See Darren. All right. Well, I usually run outside, but I do the same thing."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Oh, I can't. I don't mind hiking. And I like, I do, like, you know what, my fun thing, the fun thing I would do, and this is a, this is ripped off totally from Cam Haines, is I like to go, there's a great hike called Fryman Canyon out in the valley where I live. And I'd be like, all right, I'm going to run to Fryman Canyon. I'm going to jog to Fryman Canyon. I'm going to hike Fryman Canyon. And then I'm going to jog back. And then I wonder how long that is. don't think about it. Just know that that's your thing. Just know that that's your thing. And then all of a sudden you're like, shit, that was eight miles. You're like, that's a fucking beast. The hike doesn't even feel like anything. The hike, once you do the jog, there's a hard part there. The jog home is a fucking cakewalk. I had the best jog when I was in Serbia. I had the best jog. I think it was in Hyde Park. I think the name of the park's Hyde Park. It was, get this, it was 80% downhill. Wow. So this jog, You started the park and it was like, and I'll do it like this for you. You went like, down hell like this, down hell like this, down hell like this. And then it was like a little steep incline to get to the beginning of it. So it was like a little like nice, like lower back pain. You're like, okay, okay. And then the jog was perfect. And you did it four times. It was four miles. I loved it. My very first day, I did it. A butterfly got in front of me. It's like six in the morning. So yeah, six in the morning. The butterfly got in front of me. And it ran the whole first mile in front of me. And I just, it was like so surreal. It would disappear and then it would show back up in front of me. You sure it was real? Definitely real. And then the next day, and so I go, I'm on the right path. I'm on the right path. The next day I go for a jog, six in the morning, and it rained. And as I'm doing the steep uphill incline, a tree collapsed in front of me. Just went, and I went, whoa, a tree fell in the woods and I was here to see it. Shut the fuck up. I was like, that's crazy and it didn't hit me. I'm on the right path and then I started getting overthinking it like the next day I saw condom and I was like, this is a good place to do it. I was like, people fucked here last night. But, but yeah, that was one of the best jogs I've ever had. I could do that. I could run that park every single day and no one jogged that park in Serbia."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-15 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I actually recently had condom on my doorstep and I wanted to ask whoever is up there above what that means, what the You know, what the story behind that is. Yeah."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Like, you know, just a pissed off UPS guy. I was it compromised? What do you mean compromised? Like, was there stuff inside it?"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Oh, I didn't look."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I mean, very few people put on the condom and go, it's not for me. I'm going to take it off. Yeah. It's a little tight."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "It could be to send a message like a horse's head kind of thing. Oh, yeah. I don't know. I don't know what the message is exactly."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Do you use condoms? If you had one next time, would you use a condom?"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I don't know what a condom is. I've learned about sex from you today."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "If my wife dies, there's no condom to my future. I'll get it. I don't care. I have babies. I don't give a shit."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "You're a man of principle. I like it. Mark Marin wrote something about your book many, many, many ages ago, Life for the Party. I think there's an interesting question in there. So first of all, I wrote eloquently about you. Burke Christcher is one of the great American wild men, a Gonzo warrior driven not by cynicism or desire to reveal a dark truth, but instead by a deep, almost essential need to have a good time, no matter what. His stories track the trials and tribulations of a big hearted dude trying to fit in, help out and party and find himself. After all is said and done, we arrive with him at the true humility of joy. So when was this desire for pure joy born in you? It seems like you are driven towards this joy."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah. I think I think I arrived at it in college. I wasn't always the guy, I was really a serious, pretty serious dude, like when I got to college."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Like dark brooding serious?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah, I wanted to be like Eddie Vedder, I wanted to be like a poet and a fucking lead singer and I wanted to be taken seriously and I wanted to be attractive and I wanted to be, you know, like, I wanted to be wanted by chicks and respected by dudes and, you know, And slowly but surely, I think the bird I really am chipped away at that and was like, Hey man, like I would say funny. I would say funny things that would surprise me. They were so funny. Meaning like in my fraternity, I'd say things that were the funniest thing that I go. How did I think of that? And then slowly I was like, and I remember as that, as I chipped away at that and as I got older, I would I would, I would lean towards that. We would go on a bus trip to like Clemson and I would get on the, the, the walkie-talkie on the bus and I would do stand up for like an hour. I just make jokes for an hour. And I, and I loved the impulse of like, you know, you get on the bus and everyone's like, we're going to drink and you get that one group of girls that wasn't going to drink and then to break them. And they're like, oh, fuck it. Fine. Let's drink. And then that to, to watch that happen. And I think, Then once I, and then when I went to Russia, this is so cliche for me to say, but interacting with those young banditi, they were, they were pretty serious dudes. They didn't have like, they were pretty stoic dudes. And when you could make them laugh, it was like a real, it was a real joy, the silliest things. I remember, you know, we were told, There was a club, it was called Cafe Europa or maybe Cafe Americana. There's where everyone really hung out, like all the real dudes, the real dudes in St. Petersburg. And they had told us that like, they told us in our class that Russian women didn't have tampons. So they were like, bring tampons to give to the Babushka, the Davushka that ran the floor."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "After all this time, the fact that you're Russian sucks is awesome. Because you keep mispronouncing words horribly."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Horribly. I'm so fucking bad. I am so bad. You know that's how I got the name of the machine, right? Yeah. I was trying to say I'm a man. And I said I'm a car. And they just were like, huh? And so I came into the room one night with a top pocket full of tampons. And they were like, what are those for? I said, girls, this is how we're going to pick up girls. And the look on their face was so, it was so pure joy. I remember the first night I pulled out lemons. And this is, it sounds, it sounds make believe now to say it because it's been in the movie. And if I brought out lemons, we were going to do lemon drops. I had vodka and lemons and sugar and a pocket knife and a fanny pack. And I put out lemons and this guy Igor goes, oh, the machine runs on lemons. Like it was just so foreign that you would need lemon for them. And so I think, and I made friends with those guys. Like, I mean, like friends, whatever you can, but like, definitely me and that guy Igor were legit friends, legit friends. Like,"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "but from a place of joy. Yeah, it was like real seeing them light up."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "And then I remember backpacking through Europe after that and realizing I could bring a spark of fun to like a campfire. And I had little tricks like I learned all the currencies around the world. And so I challenge people to a currency game. I go, let's go head to head. You say, you name a country in the currency and I'll name a country in the currency. And I would, I would slow roll them. I just do all the dollars, right? The Chinese dollar, the American dollar, the Australian dollar. I'd run through all the dollars and they'd be like, you only know the dollars. And then I, and then I get, start getting really deep. I could make an event out of a night in Europe. I could make an event. I remember we were in, uh, Strausberg and the bar was supposed to close, but I had friends coming to the bar. They had the train hadn't gotten, uh, in, in yet. And I said, I said, don't close the bar. I'll stand on the bar and I'll entertain everyone in this room. I'll dance. I'll do whatever if you just keep the bar open. And the guy goes, if you can keep me laughing, I'll keep the bar open. And I danced and, and made this guy laugh on a bar for legit. I'm not even like legit 30 minutes until my friends walked in and they're like, what the fuck's going on? I had this ability to. It's without humility. I had mine looking like a fool and like doing and there were really stupid jokes at the time just very like base American frat boy jokes But I had a spark when I came back I feel I feel like I learned how to like To do that and do funny things that were like fun like I would we go to a football game and I'd I'd I brought a camera around with me a lot I like to take pictures And I remember one of the jokes I'd go is I go, hey, everybody, I told my parents I have a lot of friends. Can you guys gather around and we'll take a picture? And so like 50 people would lean around like, hey. And like just the dumbest, silliest things. And I wasn't a big self promoter. So these would happen. And I was just doing them for me and my friends. I'd bring a guitar out and I'd just make up songs. and and so I think in in watching this this serious bird get chipped away at until my like six and a half year of college where it was just this silly guy and then Rolling Stones written about me and I'm like and then I'm like well and I remember a couple serious dads going you know you got a chance to turn this into something you need to go to need you need to follow your dream and I tried to stand up the first night and I was like Maybe not wasn't the funniest guy, but man, they laughed and we had a good time for 30 minutes and it worked and it was stream of consciousness and I was like, yeah, and then of course, you know that same little path you take gets convoluted in in New York because you want to be a serious comic and you want to be taken seriously and you want to be edgy and you want to say the and then slowly but surely that you're the real Bert chips away at it and he's like, yeah, man Just fucking take your shirt off, kill a beer. Like fucking tell the machine story. Tell the story about your stupid kids. Like just, you don't need to be the fucking edgiest dude in the room. Leave that to the good ones. Let Bill and fucking Joe and Tom, they're the, those are the legit fucking gangster comics. They're, I mean, those are the fucking You're never gonna out fucking Chappelle those those guys are fucking gangsters do what you do have fun Make life fun and seize the day and fucking try to bring a spark to people and let them forget about their fucking day and the the interesting thing about alcohol that I don't really like drinking In terms of the actual physical like how it makes me feel but there's the that the camaraderie that happens what I"
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-16 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I wish there was another way to get there, but I don't think there is. That joy you get of just everybody getting together and taking shots or drinking, not the polite kind of drinking, but just everybody just, the fuck it kind of drinking."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah. And when someone goes, all right, I'm in. Like that's the funnest. And then especially when you have a big group and there's like a big group and like we were at the premiere the other night and I was working, I was legit working. I'm trying to sell the movie to outlets, media outlets. And bust them with the boys, my wife flew them in to surprise me. And they're over on the red carpet. And they're like, yo, let's scull a beer. Let's kill a beer. And I was like, oh, and then I'm like, oh, fuck it. I don't give a fuck. This is what life's about. And that moment where they're like, yeah, that's the funnest fucking, especially when I can get Leanne to do it. When I get Leanne to get a drink and she's like, Like I was supposed to drink last night and she was like, you want to just. We still have a glass of wine in the front yard and you're like, oh, my heart skipped a beat. I go glass wine in the front yard. Are we going to talk wild? Are we going to say crazy shit to each other? Like, fuck yeah. In the front yard. Front yard. What are you doing in the front yard? Let the dogs play. Oh, big trees in the front yard. Why are you sitting on the, where were you sitting? Sitting in the Adirondacks on the front porch, letting the dogs play, letting the dogs rest in the front yard. Maybe go over, pick some cherries, look at the fucking trees, hear the wind going through the front yard, and then you go to the backyard. That's where the cigar comes out, a little more privacy, but yeah. Red wine? Red wine, maw back. Keep our soul fights low."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah wine is a whole another one too. I feel sophisticated. Oh, yeah, I've I've went I traveled before Ukraine I went to Paris for the first time and drank wine there and I felt like I Was a sophisticated man, you know dude I mean to speak with French, but you don't need to you don't need to just start smoking to just have a fucking cigarette I was gonna start writing poetry to the Hemingway."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "There's like a glass of wine in Italy and like like just out in like we went we went ah the most beautiful fucking day of my life Just outside Florence They have all the vineyards and stuff, and we took a Vespa tour. Nice. And it was fucking, and Ila's too young to ride, so she's on the back. And now everyone can drink there, you know? You're not supposed to drink and drive Vespas, but a glass of wine is nothing. And you're like, okay, I guess I'll have a couple then. If you think one's nothing, then I think two's nothing also."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "So this is drunk Bert on a Vespa?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "drunk, not even drunk, but just lightly, lightly feathered where, and it's beautiful. My wife hasn't been drinking, Georgia has, Georgia's too young, Isla is too young, but I had, at dinner we had a couple and we're going through these hills and it starts raining and it starts raining and I go, Isla, what are we missing? And she goes, music, big boy. And I go, what do you want to hear? And then she just starts going, uka, shaka, uka, uka, uka, shaka, uka, uka. I can't stop this feeling. She's screaming it behind. And then I hear Georgia screaming it. And then Leanne singing it. And then Sandy and her two daughters are singing it. We're all in these vespas. And we're all singing it. And I swear to God, if I hadn't been lightly feathered, Don't know if I would have been like I know what are we missing cuz you know alcohol will give you that thing like what's next? What's bigger? How do we take this to the next level? And then I got this little girl who's my still my little girl at that moment when she's singing sing it all the good times And then we stop at the light and all of us are looking and it's pouring rain. It is, I mean, I remember sobbing crying, sobbing crying, sobbing crying. And then I was like, let's get these fucking Vespas up and get to a vineyard. And then we went to a vineyard and all the girls tried a little wine. No one got buzzed or anything, but you're just sitting there with your family going like, Fuck, dude."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "And I'm not certain you get that without a little bit of... A little bit, but then a lot is also interesting. I had a lot of whiskey with Rogan once."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I think I saw that. Yeah. I think I saw that with Whitney too. And the push-up concert contest."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "The only time I met David Goggins in person, one of the great embarrassments of my life is trashed out of my mind. I'm trying to just say how much of a fan I am. And I could tell by the look in his eye that what is actually coming out of my mouth is not good. It's not good. And his wife is embarrassed standing right there also. Just everybody's embarrassed for me. Man, I'm trying my best. And then somehow I find myself a minute later doing pushups with him as a challenge. Pushups? I didn't, it wasn't counting. All I knew I'm not stopping. And he was polite enough to stop. I think probably like 50, I don't know."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "There's a gift someone gives you when they get drunk and they allow, they get drunk and they lower their guard and they allow you to see them that way. It's a gift. It's a real gift. It's just as cool as like pulling someone aside and going, yo, I'm into anime. Like are you cool with that? And then they're going, yeah, I'm, oh, yeah. Can I show you some cool anime? And then you're like, that's not my thing, but it's like a cool thing. It's like sharing cool music with someone or like telling them something about your childhood. When you, when you get drunk, like real drunk around someone, You're giving them a gift. And that gift is, I want you to see me for everything I am. You're not gonna get any lies. You're not gonna get any bullshit. This is me at my absolute worst. I have a rule. I will never, never get mad at someone for getting too fucked up. because they're giving you a gift. They're saying like, yo, I did this on accident, but I trust you enough to let you know that this is who I am, and this is what you're getting. I love it. I love it. Especially when it comes to someone you don't expect. Like you? Shut the fuck up. David Gawking should have hugged you and said, thanks for showing me this."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-17 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah, I guess that really haven't you're right. I haven't thought of it that way is there's an intimacy to that is that is a gift of like fragility like this is me. I mean, I'm a very loving drunk, but I'm boy am I a dumb drunk."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I'm just I bet you haven't seen dumb drunk."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Well, dumb in terms of the eloquence of the words that are coming out of my mouth. So like, you're just not stitching words together correctly to make sentences. No. I turn into Hemingway lost in translation. Like, I'll start saying random words. but like translated to Japanese and back to English. It's not making any sense, but there's love. Like I think what you feel is this kind of desire to connect that I think I always feel towards other people, but when I'm drunk, let me just say, fuck it. I don't need to be polite. I'll just be loving fully."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah. Yeah. It's, uh, it's cool when people let you see that in them because some people are really like measured. There's not one drink, and then I'm done. I don't want it, no, no, no, no. And you're like, oh, show me a little more. And then like, it's cool. And I never, like, I love, my favorite moments in the next morning when they're like, did I make an asset of myself? And you get to say, not at all. Not at all. That's the coolest thing. Because some people, bad people, will leverage that over you. And you can see it's a bully tactic. They'll leverage that, the bad interactions I've had in this business that we were talking about earlier. They were people that, When you got fucked up, they used it against you. They held it over your head and they said, listen, man, I don't know what the fuck, but if you want, and you're like, hold on. And then, and then they made you, they gaslighted you into thinking you were the only one that was fucked up. And you're like, okay, I guess I know who you are now. And I was like, didn't you get fucked up a little bit too? Like, I know we smoked weed and I thought we ate Xanax, but like, what about the, I know I had a couple beers, but like, I wasn't that fucked up."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Well, Whitney's really good at that because she's the person I woke up next morning and she just said, you're wonderful, you're eloquent, you're great. I'm sure she was making that up completely."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "It was funny. I got blackout drunk at Whitney's roast of me, like blackout drunk. Don't remember any of it. And don't remember any of it. Don't remember speaking on the microphone. I don't remember talking in the microphone. And I did the set apparently. Yeah. And I said to Whitney, like in a real moment of vulnerability, Whitney's like a sister to me, like a legit sister. My daughters call her Aunt Whitney, Leanne, she's like a sister to Leanne. If she comes over to do a podcast, Whitney will show up an hour early and sit with Leanne out in Leanne's Rose Garden and just talk. And Whitney, I said the next day I called Whitney and I was getting on a plane and I knew I was hungover. I said, how bad was I last night? She goes, you were fucking fantastic. and just didn't let me sit with it. And then I watched the video and I was like, oh, I was fucking out of control. I was way out of control. Thank you for lying to me."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "So while being a wild out there comic, she's also this caring and loving human being."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "So interesting. She has the most nurturing sensibility. She is, she sends my daughter's gifts out of nowhere, just out of nowhere to send Georgia gifts up at college. And just a gift box, like she is just, she takes care of people."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "That's her love language. And she's also the person that taught me what the hell love language even means. Apparently there's a book and there's like five of them."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Oh, you and Whitney, I would love to sit in the fucking room and watch you two talk."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah, she has a robot that looks like her. And that's the future, that robot."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I told her she should have that robot dupe porn. Let someone fuck that robot. And then she gets deep faked to face if she wants, but I go, promote it. It's promoted special that way."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Like a full-on, not like showtime, softcore porn, like full-on porn."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Full-on, like the dude like, he's like, hi, welcome inside. You look tired, do you need a drink? Oops, I'm stuck in the dryer, you know."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "What's the promotion you're most proud of that you've done?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Without a doubt, it's gotta be when I took dance lessons. Yeah, that was epic. Because I tried to get Joe and Tom and Ari to do it for sober October. I was rooting for you. And they said, no, Joe's like, absolutely not. You knew Joe was gonna say no. But Joe's a legit dancer. Like he can legit dance. He took like dance lessons for a movie and is apparently an amazing dancer."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "And so... You're right. He could have said yes. He could have said yes, because I remember listening to that podcast where you really made the pitch."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah. And I said, we all take hip hop dance lessons. It's your, your cardio is through the roof and in those, you do an hour dance lesson. And then we all do a hip hop dance. And then we all put our hip top dances against each other. And we see who has the best hip hop dance. It's different than the typical stuff we do. It's fun. And we can also work out, we can do everything, but like, let's do hip hop dance. And Joe Adam Lee was like, that's a horrible idea. I will not do that. And then Tom and Ari, just whatever, they were like, yeah, I side with Joe, we'll do something else. And then I was like, but I knew I liked hip hop dance. And so I was like, I'm gonna take hip hop dance lessons anyway. I'm gonna just do it over sober October and I'm just gonna, I'm gonna fucking do it. And then maybe I'll do a hip hop dance video and then show it to them and let them rate me. And then we did it and it was $1,200 for hip hop dance lessons for like a month or whatever for like a couple weeks. And then when we did it, I thought, you know what, I bet we could put tour dates next to this. Cause it's, it was, it turned out being like kind of good, but kind of funny. I thought we could put tour dates next to this. And it was the beginning of me figuring out the whole like, my promos were short and quick. And they were always like something silly. What's up guys? It's your boy Burke, right? Sure. And then that one blew up and immediately, I was announcing the tour and immediately every tour date sold out. And then every, we added shows that day we added shows and every one of those sold out. And I was like, whoa. And then Tom was like, the fuck was that? And I was like, I think I just sold out my whole fucking tour. And, and then Tom, and then when Tom did his one like that and put his tour dates on it went over the top. He sold out his tours and and he was like whoa, he's like do I sold out every fucking show we've added shows I'm doing like an arena here and this is before we were doing arena So I was like shut the fuck up and that changed my game where I was like all right So everything's gotta be and then and then I was like I don't mind spending a little money and then the next one I did was the marching band And I was just like and but it was you know, it's real crazy. I just said Can you guys get me a marching band? And they were like, yeah, it's like 2400 bucks. I go, cool. And they're like, what do you want them to do? And I go, I don't know. We'll figure it out. And they came over and they had outfits. And they were like, so what do you want us to play? I go, what song do you guys know? And then they didn't even know each other. They were all hired people. And they were like, rubber band man. And I was like, oh, sure. Yeah. And then we just scripted it out. I was like, all right, I'll pretend it's a regular thing. Let's don't wait till I walk out and then I'll blow a whistle. And then you come out with the dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum. And then, and then we got like two videos out of that and that sold out dates and then I was like, fuck. And then, and then, and then, and then, and then the real baller one, the fucking real one, the real one was I tore all the muscles in my arm going into, into shooting the movie and I ripped all the tricep muscles off and they were retracted. So I had to go in for surgery and the anesthesiologist said to me, the night before, he's like, what music do you want going in, going under? And I was like, what? And he goes, you can pick your music going under. I said, wait, hold on. What is it? Like, I go, is it like casual? And he was like, yeah. I said, I'm doing a promo read going under. He goes, what do you mean? I said, I'll explain it to you tomorrow, but I'm going to, I'm not going to count backwards. I'm just going to do a promo read until I pass out and my phone's going to fall on the ground. All I need you to do is hit stop record and. So they rolled me into surgery. I had red rocks. I had only sold like 75% of red rocks, which is the biggest, 10,000, the biggest venue I'd ever played in. And I rolled in with my thing with CCR playing in the background. And I just was like, I was like, I lay here on this mat or on this steel pile. I was terrified as I go into surgery. I want you to know one thing. I'm playing Red Rock September 10th, and I started doing my promo read and he was like, yeah, I go Jimmy Buffett's there the night before and the night after. He's like, for real? I go, yeah, you want to come? He's like, hell, yeah. He's like, all right. He's like, you're going under. And he hits it. I go, sure. And I dropped the phone. I woke up out of surgery. And the first thing I said is, where's my phone? And he goes, you got it. And Leigh-Anne's like, I've already watched it. It's good. And I went, for real? And so that was a big one. That was a big one, too."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-18 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah, that was genius, but that was sort of opportunity, kind of jumping in an idea. Have you ever met Mr. Beast, Jimmy? No. So he's, I got to hang out with him for a day and listen to Brainstorm with the team ideas. He kind of sounds like you, but on steroids in terms of like, first of all, willing to spend any amount of money on an idea. Like anything, anything is allowed. Anything is allowed. I love that energy. The only thing is no like rated R stuff. So he's really trying to go like for the broader audience for kids and so on. So that's the limitation. So you can't do like most of the ideas that pop into my head when anything is allowed is kind of Dark yeah, but the point is to really aggressively brainstorm every single day at the Y board like what and he does that for YouTube shorts too for one minute videos Really and just like really like what is the coolest thing we could possibly do? I love that. I love that energy. And that energy, most people don't do that and they should. Basically, YouTubers do that because they're obsessed about this particular YouTube algorithm and so on. And Jimmy is the best at that. But like, that can benefit you if you're a scientist, if you're a comedian, if you're whatever."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Just go all out. There's something really authentically fun about Just coming up with a really stupid idea and just going let's see what happens who gives a fuck we've had those like I thought I could catch an arrow one time and Yeah, and my wife's like absolutely fucking not and I go I really think I can I go let's just get really close shoot it And i'll see if i can catch it and she's like no that's not what you're doing and then my cousin's like hey we can cheat it to make you look like you caught an arrow and i went what he was just okay let's do it like this and so we did it they got sold a ton of tickets it looked like i really caught it everyone knows i didn't catch an arrow i mean for the movie we did a promo legendary was like you do all the promos and we did a promo and i thought i could slide out of my car like tom cruise did In a in a helicopter and with roller skates and get behind the car and then skate behind the car and we just ran over my foot and it was real and it was scary. but we just caught her all, and in doing it, my cousin's like, give me the read. And I'm like, duh, my movie comes out Memorial Day weekend. I think we have to go to the hospital, and then we went to the hospital, and I'm in the Speedo with a helmet on, one broken roller skate, and then that did really well. And so the whole thing is just turning the camera on. You never know what's gonna fucking happen."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "And don't be afraid to look stupid and all that kind of stuff, just go all out."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Fucking ego's the death of comedy. Like, when you really give, like, it's hard to be the coolest guy in the room and still want to be a comedian. You just let yourself be whoever you are. And you'll see the great ones, they're like that. They don't, you know, they're just regular fucking dudes. And you get some real slick ones. Like, Dave's probably the coolest guy in the fucking room. He really might be. But I think that's just who the fuck he is."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Who are the, outside your close friend group, who are the greats to your top five?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "outside of my friend group?"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "So, like for me, probably Norm MacDonald, Mitch Heidberg, George Carlin, Tom Segour, number one. Oh, yeah? No."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I wanted to say that. It's an interesting pairing. No, Mitch Heidberg, David Tell, David Tell."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "David Tell. Everybody deeply respects David Tell. More than even his comedy, I love the show where he was... Insomniac. Insomniac. He's so good at just the natural comedy of human interaction."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "He's a brilliant comic. He's just a brilliant fucking mind. Norm McDonald's a fucking genius, an absolute genius. I mean, look, you know, Chapelle and Bill Burr are the two best in our generation, in my opinion. And that's, you know, and that's understanding that, like, I'm still friends with some of the best in our generation, but, like, just the way their brains work is really on the next level. Like, you know, those are guys. Stan Hope is the same way. Just fucking genius. You know, Rogan, Seguro, those are my friend group. That's my really close friend group. But, like, those other guys I'm friends with, but they're not like that. Yeah."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Louis C.K."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Oh, Louis C.K. Fuck. He's amazing. It's hard to do because you start like forgetting the people and then it's almost like people go, oh, so you didn't like that person? You're like, no, I fucking love that person."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I mean, there's, for me, like Robin Williams, which is a whole other thing."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Oh, yeah. Sarah Silverman. Fucking, I love Janine. I'm a fucking big Janine fan. I love her brain. Marin's fucking hilarious. You know, Patton's brilliant. David Cross. I mean, there's like, it's, you know, it's really to ignore those guys. And those guys were like the whole forefront of the alternative comedy front. They're fucking amazing."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-19 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah. And the people that had like Marin or Joe that have podcasts is interesting. It's an interesting pairing because you get to know like everything about them, but then they're also comedians. And I've gotten, I've gone to Joe's club a lot. Listen, Joe and just that whole group of comics do comedy and go to the same set over and over and over to see how it changes. It's really cool."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "It's the coolest thing when I first started to watch someone like a tell was really brilliant at it because you'd watch him tinker with a set. Yeah. And he'd have an idea like hitting someone over the head with a hammer from behind. And then he'd work it nine different ways, you know, and you'd be like, whoa. So the hitting hammer in the head is the thing that he's working on."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I hope Eddie Murphy comes back. He's one of the greats."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Chris Rock. Chris Rock's fucking bring the pain is like the reason I got into comedy. Yeah."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Do you have advice for young folks? You seem like a stellar example of successful human being. Or more seriously, a very kind of nonlinear life. Do you have advice for young people in high school and college? How to have a good life they can be proud of?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Don't worry too much about what you do when you get older. But when you do start worrying, find the thing you love and it'll never feel like work. To fucking, I can't imagine what it must feel like to be a lawyer and have to read papers or whatever they do all day and know that that's my day. I mean, it must feel like what school felt like for me. If you find that thing you love to do, You will work endlessly, effortlessly, and hardest fucking shit every day, and you'll love every day of your life."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Fine. Would you love and let it kill you? Bacowski said that."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Then that's the fucking thing. Cause that's what I'm doing. I'm letting it fucking take. I'm, I'm fucking, I'm, I'm on that fucking bullet train to fucking nowhere on this fucking comedy journey. I love it. I love it."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "So it's like the Hunter S. Thompson thing, however you put it, basically you're not supposed to end up in a well-preserved box. You slide it in sideways, smoke, just beat up, just a giant mess."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I love those guys that can really live that life that are like, yeah, man, I'm breaking it. I'm breaking it down. Like a guy like Tony Hawk or Matt Hoffman, who's like, yeah, if I don't fucking break the fuck out of this thing before, then I'm not doing it right."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "And then again, there's also Churchill who tried to break the thing and he couldn't. Lived into his 90s, a bad motherfucker. Just a bad motherfucker. So I guess the only hope we can have for Burr-Crisher is that you're gonna be the Winston Churchill of comedy."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "My life has lived perfectly. If I'm 95 years old and all my friends are dead. Yeah. And they're like, can you believe that wolf got Rogan? Yeah. Can you believe, Segura, 600 pounds, and they had to carry him out in a crane out of that house. Can you believe that it's just Bert, Chrysler, and Joey Diaz left?"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Just standing there in October. So, in October, just the two of you left. Just laughing."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "In October, it's just I'm 95 at the Mark Twain Awards, and they're like, Bert, Chrysler, still fucking here. Who saw that coming?"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I hope so. Bert, I'm a huge fan of yours. It meant so much to me when you said that you knew who I was like we were talking about. It's just, it's so cool. It's so cool. Thank you for putting so much joy and love out there in the world. I'm a huge fan and thank you for the love you give me."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Thank you, man. I am a huge fan of yours. You keep doing you. I'll keep doing me. And then let's see if we can meet in the middle sometime. Have a cold beer in the afternoon."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Love you, brother."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Love you. Thanks for listening to this conversation with Bert Kreischer. To support this podcast, please check out our sponsors in the description. And now let me leave you with some words from Hunter S. Thompson. Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly proclaiming, wow, what a ride. Thank you for listening. I hope to see you next time."
}
] | 382-bert-kreischer-comedy-drinking-rogan-segura-churchill-20 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Please check out our sponsors in the description and now with your friends, here's Chris Lattner. It's been, I think, two years since we last talked and in that time, you somehow went and co-created a new programming language called Mojo. So it's optimized for AI, it's a super set of Python. Let's look at the big picture."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "What is the vision for Mojo? For Mojo, well, so I mean, I think you have to zoom out. So I've been working on a lot of related technologies for many, many years. So I've worked on LLVM and a lot of things in mobile and servers and things like this, but the world's changing. And what's happened with AI is we have new GPUs and new machine learning accelerators and other ASICs and things like that that make AI go real fast. At Google, I worked on TPUs. That's one of the biggest, larger scale deployed systems that exist for AI. And really what you see is if you look across all of the things that are happening in the industry, there's this new compute platform coming. And it's not just about CPUs or GPUs or TPUs or NPUs or IPUs or whatever, all the PUs, right? It's about how do we program these things, right? And so for software folks like us, right, it doesn't do us any good if there's this amazing hardware that we can't use. And one of the things you find out really quick is that having the theoretical capability of programming something and then having the world's power and the innovation of all the smart people in the world get unleashed on something can be quite different. And so really where Mojo came from was starting from a problem of we need to be able to take machine learning, take the infrastructure underneath it and make it way more accessible, way more usable, way more understandable by normal people and researchers and other folks that are not themselves like experts in GPUs and things like this. And then through that journey, we realized, hey, we need syntax for this."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "We need to do program language, right? So one of the main features of the language, I say so fully in jest is that it allows you to have the file extension to be an emoji or the fire emoji, which is one of the first emojis used as a file extension I've ever seen in my life. And then you ask yourself the question, why in the 21st century are we not using Unicode for file extensions? This means it's an epic decision. I think clearly the most important decision made in most, but you could also just use Mojo as the file extension."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Well, so, okay, so take a step back. I mean, come on, Lex. Do you think that the world's ready for this? This is a big moment in the world, right?"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "This is, we're releasing this onto the world. This is innovation. I mean, it really is kind of brilliant. Emojis are such a big part of our daily lives."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Why is it not in programming? This is innovation. Well, and like you take a step back and look at what file extensions are, right? They're basically metadata, right? And so why are we spending all the screen space on them and all this stuff? Also, you know, you have them stacked up next to text files and PDF files and whatever else. Like if you're gonna do something cool, you want it to stand out, right? And emojis are colorful."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "They're visual, they're beautiful, right? What's been the response so far from, is there support on like Windows on the operating system in displaying like file explorer?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The one problem I've seen is that Git doesn't escape it right. And so it thinks that the fire emoji is unprintable and so it like prints out weird hex things if you use the command line Git tool. But everything else, as far as I'm aware, works fine. And I have faith that Git can be improved. So I'm not sure. And so GitHub is fine. GitHub is fine, yeah. GitHub is fine, Visual Studio Code, Windows, like all this stuff, totally ready because people have internationalization in their normal part of their path. So this is just like taking the next step, right? Somewhere between, oh wow, that makes sense. Cool, I like new things too. Oh my God, you're killing my baby. Like what are you talking about? This can never be, like I can never handle this. How am I gonna type this, like all these things. And so this is something where I think that the world will get there. We don't have to bet the whole farm on this. I think we can provide both paths,"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "but I think it'll be great. And so GitHub, when can we have emojis"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "as part of the code, I wonder? Yeah, so I mean, lots of languages provide that. So I think that we have partial support for that. It's probably not fully done yet, but yeah, you can do that. For example, in Swift, you can do that for sure. So an example we gave at Apple was the dog cow. So that's a classical Mac heritage thing. And so you use the dog and the cow emoji together, and that could be your variable name. But of course the internet went and made pile of poop for everything. So if you wanna name your function pile of poop, then you can totally go to town and see how that gets through code review."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Okay, so let me just ask a bunch of random questions. So is Mojo primarily designed for AIs, or is it a general purpose programming?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah, good question, yeah, good question. So it's AI first. And so AI is driving a lot of the requirements. And so Modular is building and designing and driving Mojo forward. And it's not because it's an interesting project theoretically to build, it's because we need it. And so at Modular, we're really tackling the AI infrastructure landscape and the big problems in AI. And the reasons that it is so difficult to use and scale and adopt and deploy and all these big problems in AI. And so we're coming at it from that perspective. Now, when you do that, when you start tackling these problems, you realize that the solution to these problems isn't actually an AI specific solution. And so while we're doing this, we're building Mojo to be a fully general programming language. And that means that you can obviously tackle GPUs and CPUs and these AI things, but it's also a really great way to build NumPy and other things like that. Or just if you look at what many Python libraries are today, often they're a layer of Python for the API and they end up being C and C++ code underneath them. That's very true in AI, that's true in lots of other domains as well. And so anytime you see this pattern, that's an opportunity for Mojo to help simplify the world"
}
] | 381-chris-lattner-future-of-programming-and-ai-0 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "and help people have one thing. To optimize through simplification by having one thing. So you mentioned Modular. Mojo is the programming language,"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Modular is the whole software stack. So just over a year ago, we started this company called Modular. Okay, what Modular is about is, it's about taking AI and up leveling it into the next generation, right? And so if you take a step back, what's gone on in the last five, six, seven, eight years is that we've had things like TensorFlow and PyTorch and these other systems come in, you've used them, you know this. And what's happened is these things have grown like crazy and they get tons of users. It's in production deployment scenarios, it's being used to power so many systems. I mean, AI is all around us now. It used to be controversial years ago, but now it's a thing. But the challenge with these systems is that they haven't always been thought out with current demands in mind. And so you think about it, where were LLMs eight years ago? Well, they didn't exist, right? AI has changed so much and a lot of what people are doing today are very different than when these systems were built. And meanwhile, the hardware side of this has gotten into a huge mess. There's tons of new chips and accelerators and every big company's announcing a new chip every day, it feels like. And so between that, you have like moving system on one side, moving system on the other side and it just turns into this gigantic mess, which makes it very difficult for people to actually use AI, particularly in production deployment scenarios. And it's what modular is doing is we're helping build out that software stack to help solve some of those problems so then people can be more productive and get more AI research into production. Now, what Mojo does is it's a really, really, really important piece of that. And so that is part of that engine and part of the technology"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "that allows us to solve these problems. So Mojo is a programming language that allows you to do a higher level programming, the low level programming, they do all kinds of programming in that spectrum"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "that gets you closer and closer to the hardware. So take a step back."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "So Lex, what do you love about Python? Oh boy, where do I begin?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "What is love, what do I love about Python? Your guy who knows love, I know this."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yes, yes. How intuitive it is, how it feels like I'm writing natural language English, how when I can not just write, but read other people's code, somehow I can understand it faster. It's more condensed than other languages, like ones I'm really familiar with like C++ and C. There's a bunch of sexy little features. Yeah. We'll probably talk about some of them,"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "but list comprehensions and stuff like this. Yeah. Also, and don't forget the entire ecosystem of all the packages. Oh yeah, there's probably huge. Because there's always something,"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "if you wanna do anything, there's always a package. Yeah, so it's not just the ecosystem of the packages and the ecosystem of the humans that do it. That's a really, that's an interesting dynamic. That's good. I think something about the usability and the ecosystem makes the thing viral,"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "it grows and then it's a virtuous cycle, I think. Well, and there's many things that went into that. So I think that ML was very good for Python. And so I think that TensorFlow and PyTorch and these systems embracing Python really took and helped Python grow. But I think that the major thing underlying it is that Python's like the universal connector, right? It really helps bring together lots of different systems so you can compose them and build out larger systems without having to understand how it works."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "But then what is the problem with Python? Well, I guess you could say several things,"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "but probably that it's slow. I think that's usually what people complain about, right? And so slow, I mean, other people complain about tabs and spaces versus curly braces or whatever, but I mean, those people are just wrong because it is actually just better to use indentation."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Wow, strong words. So actually, I'm a small tangent. Let's actually take that, let's take all kinds of tangents. Oh, come on, Lex, you can push me on. I can take it. Design, listen, I've recently left Emacs for VS Code. Okay. The kind of hate mail I had to receive because on the way to doing that, I also said I've considered Vim. Yep. And chose not to and went with VS Code. You're touching on deep religions, right? Anyway, tabs is an interesting design decision and so you've really written a new programming language here. Yes, it is a super set of Python, but you can make a bunch of different interesting decisions here. Totally, yeah. And you chose actually to stick with Python as in terms of some of the syntax."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah, well, so let me explain why, right? So I mean, you can explain this in many rational ways. I think that the indentation is beautiful, but that's not a rational explanation, right? But I can defend it rationally, right? So first of all, Python 1 has millions of programmers. Yeah. It is huge, it's everywhere, it owns machine learning, right? And so factually, it is the thing, right? Second of all, if you look at it, C code, C++ code, Java, whatever, Swift, curly brace languages, also run through formatting tools and get indented. And so if they're not indented correctly, first of all, we'll twist your brain around, it can lead to bugs. There's notorious bugs that have happened across time where the indentation was wrong or misleading and it wasn't formatted, right? And so it turned into an issue, right? And so what ends up happening in modern large scale code bases is people run automatic formatters. So now what you end up with is indentation and curly braces. Well, if you're gonna have the notion of grouping, why not have one thing, right? And get rid of all the clutter and have a more beautiful thing, right? Also you look at many of these languages, it's like, okay, well you can have curly braces or you can omit them if there's one statement or you just like enter this entire world of complicated design space that objectively you don't need"
}
] | 381-chris-lattner-future-of-programming-and-ai-1 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "if you have Python style indentation, so. Yeah, I would love to actually see statistics on errors made because of indentation. Like how many errors are made in Python versus in C++ that have to do with basic formatting, all that kind of stuff."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I would love to see. I think it's probably pretty minor because once you get, like you use VS code, I do too. So if you get VS code set up, it does the indentation for you generally, right? And so you don't, you know, it's actually really nice to not have to fight it. And then what you can see is the editor is telling you how your code will work by indenting it,"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "which I think is pretty cool. I honestly don't think I've ever, I don't remember having an error in Python"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "because I indented stuff wrong. So, I mean, I think that there's, again, this is a religious thing. And so I can joke about it and I love to kind of, you know, I realize that this is such a polarizing thing and everybody wants to argue about it. And so I like poking at the bear a little bit, right? But frankly, right, come back to the first point, Python one, like it's huge, it's an AI, it's the right thing. For us, like we see Mojo as being an incredible part of the Python ecosystem. We're not looking to break Python or change it or quote unquote fix it. We love Python for what it is. Our view is that Python is just not done yet. And so if you look at, you know, you mentioned Python being slow. Well, there's a couple of different things that go into that, which we can talk about if you want. But one of them is that it just doesn't have those features that you would use to do C-like programming. And so if you say, okay, well, I'm forced out of Python into C for certain use cases, well, then what we're doing is we're saying, okay, well, why is that? Can we just add those features that are missing from Python back up to Mojo? And then you can have everything that's great about Python, all the things you're talking about that you love, plus not be forced out of it when you do something a little bit more computationally intense"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "or weird or hardware-y or whatever it is that you're doing. Well, a million questions I want to ask, but high level again, is it compiled or is it an interpreted language?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "So Python is just in time compilation, what's Mojo? So Mojo is a complicated answer, it does all the things. So it's interpreted, it's shit compiled, and it's statically compiled. And so this is for a variety of reasons. So one of the things that makes Python beautiful is that it's very dynamic. And because it's dynamic, one of the things they added is that it has this powerful metaprogramming feature. And so if you look at something like PyTorch or TensorFlow or I mean, even a simple use case, like you'd find a class that has the plus method, right? You can overload the dunder methods like dunder add, for example, and then the plus method works on your class. And so it has very nice and very expressive dynamic metaprogramming features. In Mojo, we want all those features come in. Like we don't want to break Python, we want all to work. But the problem is, is you can't run those super dynamic features on an embedded processor or on a GPU, right? Or if you could, you probably don't want to just because of the performance. And so we entered this question of saying, okay, how do you get the power of this dynamic metaprogramming into a language that has to be super efficient in specific cases? And so what we did was we said, okay, we'll take that interpreter, Python has an interpreter in it. Right? Take that interpreter and allow it to run at compile time. And so now what you get is you get compile time metaprogramming. And so this is super interesting and super powerful because one of the big advantages you get is you get Python style, expressive APIs. you get the ability to have overloaded operators. If you look at what happens inside of PyTorch, for example, with automatic differentiation and eager mode and all these things, they're using these really dynamic and powerful features at runtime. But we can take those features and lift them, so that they run at compile time."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "So your C++ is metaprogramming with templates,"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "but it's really messy. It's super messy. It was accidentally, I mean, different people have different interpretations. My interpretation is that it was made accidentally powerful. It was not designed to be Turing complete, for example, but that was discovered along the way accidentally. So there have been a number of languages in the space, and so they usually have templates or code instantiation, code copying features of various sorts. Some more modern languages or some more newer languages, let's say, they're fairly unknown, like Zig, for example, says, okay, well, let's take all of those types that you can run it, all those things you can do at runtime, and allow them to happen at compile time. So one of the problems with C++, I mean, which is one of the problems with C++. Here we go. Wrong words. We're going to send everybody to it. That's okay. I mean, everybody hates me for a variety of reasons anyways, I'm sure. I've written enough. Just the way they show love. I've written enough C++ code to earn a little bit of grumpiness with C++. But one of the problems with it is that the meta programming system templates is just a completely different universe from the normal runtime programming world. So if you do a meta programming and programming, it's just like a different universe. Different syntax, different concepts, different stuff going on. So again, one of our goals with Mojo's to make things really easy to use, easy to learn."
}
] | 381-chris-lattner-future-of-programming-and-ai-2 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "So there's a natural stepping stone, for example. You're going to send everybody to it."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "I freaking. As you do this, you say, okay, well, I have to do programming at runtime, after you're programming at compile time, why are these different things?"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "How hard is that to pull it out, because that sounds, to me, as a fan of meta programming in C++, even, how hard is it to pull that off? That sounds really, really exciting, because you can do the same style programming at compile time and at runtime."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "That's really, really exciting. Yep, yep. And so, in terms of the compiler implementation details, it's hard. I won't be shy about that, it's super hard. It requires what Mojo has underneath the covers is a completely new approach to the design of the compiler itself. And so this builds on these technologies like MLIR that you mentioned, but also includes other caching and other interpreters and JIT compilers, and other stuff. Show you a duplicate of the inside the compiler. Within the compiler, yes."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Show you a duplicate of the interpreter."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Within in the compiler, yeah. And so it really takes the standard model of programming languages and kind of twists it and unifies it the runtime model, which I think is really cool. To me, the value of that is that, again, many of these languages have metaprogramming features. They grow macros or something. Lisp, right? I know your roots, right? This is a powerful thing. If you go back to Lisp, one of the most powerful things about it is that it said that the metaprogramming and the programming are the same. That made it way simpler, way more consistent, way easier to understand, reason about, and it made it more composable. If you build a library, you can use it both at runtime and compile time, which is pretty"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "cool. Cool. For machine learning, I think metaprogramming, I think we could generally say, is extremely useful. I'll jump around, but the feature of autotuning and adaptive compilation just blows my mind."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah. Let's come back to that. All right. What is machine learning? What is a machine learning model? You take a PyTorch model off the internet, right? It's really interesting to me because what PyTorch and what TensorFlow and all these frameworks are pushing compute into is they're pushing into this abstract specification of a compute problem, which then gets mapped in a whole bunch of different ways. This is why it became a metaprogramming problem. You want to be able to say, cool, I have this neural net. Now run it with batch size 1,000. Do a mapping across batch. Or okay, I want to take this problem, now run it across 1,000 GPUs. This problem of describe the compute and then map it and do things and transform it, actually it's very profound, and that's one of the things that makes machine learning systems really special."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Maybe keep checking. All right. Can you describe autotuning and how do you pull off... I mean, I guess adaptive compilation is what we're talking about as metaprogramming. How do you pull off autotuning? Is that as profound as I think it is? It seems like a really... We'll mention list comprehensions. To me, from a quick glance at Mojo, which by the way, I have to absolutely dive in. As I realize how amazing this is, I absolutely must dive in."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "That looks like just an incredible feature for machine learning people. Yeah. Well, so what is autotuning? Take a step back. Autotuning is a feature in Mojo. Very little of what we're doing is actually research. Many of these ideas have existed in other systems and other places, and so what we're doing is we're pulling together good ideas, remixing them, and making them into hopefully a beautiful system. So autotuning, the observation is that it turns out hardware systems, algorithms are really complicated. It turns out maybe you don't actually want to know how the hardware works. A lot of people don't. There are lots of really smart hardware people, I know a lot of them, where they know everything about, okay, the cache size is this, and the number of registers is that, and if you use this length of vector, it's going to be super efficient because it maps directly onto what it can do. All this kind of stuff. The GPU has SMs, and it has a warp size of whatever. All the stuff that goes into these things, or the tile size of a TPU is 128, these factoids. My belief is that most normal people, and I love hardware people also, I'm not trying to fen literally everybody on the internet, but most programmers actually don't want to know this stuff. So if you come at it from perspective of how do we allow people to build both more abstracted but also more portable code, because it could be that the vector length changes, or the cache size changes, or it could be that the tile size of your matrix changes, or the number in A100 versus an H100 versus a Volta versus a whatever GPU have different characteristics. A lot of the algorithms that you run are actually the same, but the parameters, these magic numbers you have to fill in end up being really fiddly numbers that an expert has to go figure out. So what autotuning does, it says, okay, well, guess what? There's a lot of compute out there. So instead of having humans go randomly try all the things, or do a grid search, or go search some complicated multi-dimensional space, how about we have computers do that? And so what autotuning does is you can say, hey, here's my algorithm. If it's a matrix operation or something like that, you can say, okay, I'm going to carve it up into blocks, I'm going to do those blocks in parallel, and I want this with 128 things that I'm running on, I want to cut it this way or that way or whatever."
}
] | 381-chris-lattner-future-of-programming-and-ai-3 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "And you can say, hey, go see which one's actually empirically better on this system."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "And then the result of that, you cash for that system, you save it and save it. And so come back to twisting your compiler brain, right? So not only does the compiler have an interpreter that you use to do programming, the compiler that interpreter that metaprogramming now has to actually take your code and go run it on a target machine, see which one of likes the best and then stitch it in, and then keep"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "going. Part of the compilation is machine specific."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah. Well, so I mean, this is an optional feature, right? So you don't have to use it for everything. But yeah, if you're so one, one of one of the things that we're in the quest of is ultimate performance. Yes. Right. Ultimate performance is important for a couple of reasons, right? So if you're an enterprise, you're looking to save costs and compute and things like this, ultimate performance translates to fewer servers. Like if you care about the environment, hey, better performance leads to more efficiency, right? I mean, you could joke and say like, you know, Python's bad for the environment. Right. And so if you move to Mojo, it's like at least 10 X better just out of the box and keep going. Right. But but performance is also interesting because it leads to better products. And so in the space of machine learning, if you reduce the latency of a model so that it runs faster, so every time you query the server running the model, it takes less time, well, then the product team can go and make the model bigger. Well, that's actually makes it so you have a better experience as a customer. And so a lot of people care about that."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah. Hey, you know. So for auto tuning for like tile size, you mentioned 120 for TPU. You would specify like a bunch of options to try just in the code. Just simple statement. And then you just set and forget and know, depending"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "what wherever it compiles, it'll actually be the fastest. And yeah, exactly. And the beauty of this is that it helps you in a whole bunch of different ways. Right. So if you're building so often what will happen is that, you know, you've written a bunch of software yourself, right? You you wake up one day, you say, I have an idea. I'm going to go cut up some code. I get to work. I forget about it and move on with life. I come back six months or a year or two years or three years later, you dust it off and you go use it again in a new environment. And maybe your GP is different. Maybe you're running on a server instead of a laptop, maybe whatever. Right. And so the problem now is you say, OK, well, I mean, again, not everybody cares about performance, but if you do, you say, OK, well, I want to take advantage of all these new features. I don't want to break the old thing, though. Right. And so the typical way of handling this kind of stuff before is, you know, if you're talking about people's templates, or you're talking about C with macros, you end up with if deaths, you get like all these weird things get layered in, make the code super complicated. And then how do you test it becomes this crazy complexity, multidimensional space you have to worry about? And, you know, that just doesn't scale very well."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Actually, let me just jump around before I go to some specific features like the increase in performance here that we're talking about can be just insane. You write that Moja can provide a 35000 X speed up over Python."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "How does it do that? How does it do that? Yeah, so I can even do more, but we'll get to that. So so first of all, when we say that we're talking about what's called C Python, it's the default Python that everybody uses when you type Python three. That's like typically the one you use. Right. So C Python is an interpreter. And so interpreters, they have an extra layer of bike codes and things like this that they have to go read, parse, interpret, and it makes them kind of slow from that perspective. And so one of the first things we do is we move to a compiler. And so I'm just moving to a compiler, getting the interpreter out of the loop is two to five to 10 X speed up depending on the code. So just out of the gate, like she's in more modern techniques. Now, if you do that, one of the things you can do is you can start to look at how CPython started to lay out data. And so one of the things that CPython did, and this isn't part of the Python spec necessarily, but this is just sets of decisions, is that if you take an integer, for example, it'll put it in an object because in Python, everything's an object. And so they do the very logical thing of keeping the memory representation of all objects the same. So all objects have a header, they have payload data, and what this means is that every time you pass around an object, you're passing around a pointer to the data. Well, this has overhead. It turns out that modern computers don't like chasing pointers very much and things like this. It means you have to allocate the data. It means you have to reference count it, which is another way that Python uses to keep track of memory. And so this has a lot of overhead. And so if you say, okay, pointer, let's try to get that out of the heap, out of a box, of the new direction, and into the registers."
}
] | 381-chris-lattner-future-of-programming-and-ai-4 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "That's another 10x. So it adds up, if you reference counting every single thing you create, that adds up."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "That adds up. Yeah, and if you look at people complain about the Python GIL, this is one of the things that hurts the parallelism, that's because of the reference counting, right, so the GIL and reference counting are very tightly intertwined in Python, it's not the only thing, but it's very tightly intertwined. And so then you lean into this and you say, OK, cool, well, modern computers, they can do more than one operation at a time. So they have vectors. What is a vector? Well, a vector allows you to take one, instead of taking one piece of data, doing an add or a multiply and then picking up the next one. You can now do 4, or 8, or 16, or 32 at a time. Well, Python doesn't expose that because of reasons. And so now you can say, OK, well, you can adopt that. And now you have threads. Now you have additional things, like you can control memory hierarchy. And so Moda allows you to do, is it allows you to start taking advantage of all these powerful things that have been built into the hardware over time and it gives, the library gives very nice features so you can say just parallelize this, do this in parallel, right? So it's very powerful weapons against slowness which is why people have been I think having fun like just taking code and making it go fast because it's just kind of an adrenaline"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "rush to see like how fast you can get things. Before I talk about some of the interesting stuff with parallelization and all that, let's first talk about like the basics. We talked to indentation, right? So this thing looks like Python. It's sexy and beautiful like Python as I mentioned. Is it a typed language? So what's the role of types? Yeah, good question."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "So yeah, good question. So Python has types, it has strings, it has integers, it has dictionaries and like all that stuff but they all live at runtime, right? And so because all those types live at runtime in Python you never, you don't have to spell them. Python also has like this whole typing thing going on now and a lot of people use it. I'm not talking about that. That's kind of a different thing. We can go back to that if you want. But typically the, you know, you just say I take, I have a def and my def takes two parameters and I'm gonna call them a and b and I don't have to write a type, okay? So that is great but what that does is that forces what's called a consistent representation. So these things have to be a pointer to an object with the object header and they all have to look the same. And then when you dispatch a method, when you go through all the same different paths no matter what the receiver, whatever that type is. So what Mojo does is it allows you to have more than one kind of type. And so what it does is allows you to say okay, cool. I have an object and objects behave like Python does, and so it's fully dynamic and that's all great. And for many things, classes like that's all very powerful and very important. But if you want to say hey it's an integer and it's 32 bits, or 64 bits, or whatever it is. Or it's a floating point value. It's 64 bits. Well then the compiler can take that and it can use that to do way better optimization. It turns out, again, getting rid of the indirection, that's huge, means you can get better code completion because compiler knows what the type is and so it knows what operations work on it. That's actually pretty huge. What Mojo does is it allows you to progressively adopt types into your program. You can start, again, it's compatible with Python. Then you can add however many types you want wherever you want them. And if you don't wanna deal with it you don't have to deal with it, right? And so one of our opinions on this is that it's not that types are the right thing"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "or the wrong thing, it's that they're a useful thing. Which was kind of optional, it's not strict typing and you don't have to specify type. Exactly. Okay, so starting from the thing that Python is kind of reaching towards right now with trying to inject types into it,"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "what it's doing. Yeah, with a very different approach but yes."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah, so. What's the different approach, I'm actually one of the people that have not been using types very much in Python. So I haven't. Why did you say? It just, well, because I know the importance. It's like adults use strict typing. And so I refuse to grow up in that sense. It's a kind of rebellion. But I just know that."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "That's okay. Why did you say?"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "But it probably reduces the amount of errors, even just for forget about performance improvements."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "It probably reduces errors when you do strict typing. Yeah. So I mean, I think it's interesting if you look at that, right? The reason I'm giving you a hard time, is that there's this cultural norm, this pressure, there has to be a right way to do things. Growing up is only do it one way. And if you don't do that, you should feel bad. Some people feel like Python's a guilty pleasure or something. And that's like, when it gets serious, I need to go rewrite it. I mean, cool, I understand history and I understand kind of where this comes from, but I don't think it has to be a guilty pleasure. So if you look at that, you say, why do you have to rewrite it? Well, we have to rewrite to deploy. Well, why do you want to deploy? Well, you care about performance, or you care about perfectability or you want, a tiny thing on the server that has no dependencies or you know, you have objectives that you're trying to attain. So what if Python can achieve those objectives? So if you want types, well, maybe you want types because you want to make sure you're passing the right thing. Sure, you can add a type. If you don't care, you're prototyping some stuff, you're hacking some things out, you're like pulling some ram code off the internet, it should just work. And you shouldn't be pressured, you shouldn't feel bad about doing the right thing or the thing that feels good. Now, if you're in a team, you're working at some massive internet company and you have 400 million lines of Python code, well, they may have a house rule that you use types because it makes it easier for different humans to talk to each other and understand what's going on and bugs at scale. And so there are lots of good reasons why you might want to use types, but that doesn't mean that everybody should use them all the time. So what Mojo does is it says, cool, well, allow people to use types. And if you use types, you get nice things out of it, right? You get better performance and things like this, right? But Mojo is a full, compatible super set of Python, right? And so that means that has to work without types. It has to support all the dynamic things, has to support all the packages, it has to support list comprehensions and things like this, right? And so that that starting point, I think, is really important. And I think that, again, you can look at why I care so much about this, and there's many different aspects of that, one of which is the world went through a very challenging migration from Python 2 to Python 3, right? And this migration took many years, and it was very painful for many teams, right? And there's a lot of things that went on in that. I'm not an expert in all the details, and I honestly don't want to be. I don't want the world to have to go through that, right? And people can ignore Mojo, and if it's not their thing, that's cool. But if they want to use Mojo, I don't want them to have to rewrite all their code."
}
] | 381-chris-lattner-future-of-programming-and-ai-5 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah, I mean, okay, the superset part is just, I mean, there's so much brilliant stuff here. That definitely is incredible. We'll talk about that. First of all, how's the typing implemented differently in Python versus Mojo? So this heterogeneous flexibility, you said, is definitely implemented."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "First of all, how is it definitely implemented? Yeah. So I'm not a full expert in the whole backstory on types in Python. So I'll give you that. I can give you my understanding. My understanding is basically, like many dynamic languages, the ecosystem went through a phase where people went from writing scripts to writing large scale, huge code bases in Python, and at scale, it kind of helps to have types. People want to be able to reason about interfaces. What do you expect to string or an int? These basic things, right? And so what the Python community started doing is it started saying, okay, let's have tools on the side, checker tools. Right? To go and enforce some variants, check for bugs, try to identify things. These are called static analysis tools generally, and so these tools run over your code and try to look for bugs. What ended up happening is there's so many of these things, so many different weird patterns and different approaches on specifying the types and different things going on that the Python community realize and recognize, hey, hey, hey, there's a thing here. And so what they started to do is they started to standardize the syntax for adding types to Python. Now, one of the challenges that they had is if they're coming from kind of this fragmented world where there's lots of different tools, they have different trade-offs and interpretations and the types mean different things. And so, if you look at types in Python, according to the Python spec, the types are ignored, right? So, according to the Python spec, you can write pretty much anything in a type position, okay? And technically, you can write any expression, okay. Now, that's beautiful because you can extend it. You can do cool things. build your own tools, you can build your own house, linter or something like that, right? But it's also a problem because any existing Python program may be using different tools and they have different interpretations. And so if you adopt somebody's package into your ecosystem, try around the tool you prefer, it may throw out tons of weird errors and warnings and problems just because it's incompatible with how these things work. Also because they're added late and they're not checked by the Python interpreter, it's always kind of more of a hint than it is a requirement. Also the CPython implementation can't use them for performance and so it's really-"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "That's a big one, right? So you can't utilize for the compilation,"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "for the just in time compilation. Okay. Exactly. And this all comes back to the design principle of it's, they're kind of hints, they're kind of the definitions a little bit murky. It's unclear exactly the interpretation in a bunch of cases. And so because of that, you can't actually, even if you want to, it's really difficult to use them to say like, it is going to be an int and if it's not, it's a problem, right? A lot of code would break if you did that. So in Mojo, right. So you can still use those kinds of type annotations, it's fine, but in Mojo if you declare a type and you use it, then it means it is going to be that type and the compiler helps you check that enforce it and it's safe."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "And it's not, it's not a best effort hint kind of a thing. So if you try to shove a string type thing into an integer- You get an error. And you get another."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "From the compiler at compile time. You get an error."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "And you get another. Nice."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Okay, what kind of basic types are there? Yeah, so Mojo is pretty hardcore in terms of what it tries to do in the language, which is the philosophy there is that we, again, if you look at Python, Python's a beautiful language because it's so extensible. And so all of the different things in Python, like for loops and plus, and all these things can be accessed through these underbar and bar methods. Okay, so you have to say, okay, if I make something that is super fast, I can go all the way down to the metal. Why do I need to have integers built into the language? And so what Mojo does is it says, okay, well, we can have this notion of structs. So you have classes in Python, now you can have structs. Classes are dynamic, structs are static. Cool, we can get high performance, we can write C++ kind of code with structs if you want. These things mix and work beautifully together. But what that means is that you can go and implement strings and ints and floats and arrays and all that kind of stuff in the language, right? And so that's really cool because, you know, to me as a idealizing compiler language type of person, what I wanna do is I wanna get magic out of the compiler and put it in the libraries. Because if somebody can, you know, if we can build an integer that's beautiful and it has an amazing API and it does all the things you'd expect an integer to do, but you don't like it, maybe you want a big integer, maybe you wanna like sideways integer, I don't know, like what all the space of integers are, then you can do that and it's not a second-class citizen. And so if you look at certain other languages like C++, one I also love and use a lot, int is hard-coded in the language, but complex is not. And so it's kind of weird that, you know, you have this STD complex class, but you have int. And complex tries to look like a natural numeric type and things like this, but integers in floating point have these like special promotion rules and other things like that, they're magic and they're hacked into the compiler. And because of that, you can't actually make something"
}
] | 381-chris-lattner-future-of-programming-and-ai-6 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "that works like the built in types. Is there something provided as a standard, because you know, because it's AI first, you know, numerical types is so important here, so is there something come like a nice standard implementation of integer inflow?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah, yeah. So we're still building all that stuff out, so we provide entries and floats and all that kind of stuff. We also provide buffers and tensors and things like that that you'd expect in an ML context. Honestly, we need to keep designing and redesigning and working with the community to build that out and make that better. That's not our strength right now. Give us six months or a year, and I think it'll be way better. But the power of putting in the library means that we can have teams of experts that aren't"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "compiler engineers that can help us design and refine and drive us forward. So one of the exciting things we should mention here is that this is new and fresh. This cake is unbaked. It's almost baked. You can tell it's delicious, but it's not fully ready to be consumed."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yep. That's very fair. It is very useful, but it's very useful if you're a super low-level programmer right now. And what we're doing is we're working our way up the stack. And so the way I would look at Mojo today in May in 2023 is that it's like a 0.1. So I think that a year from now, it's going to be way more interesting to a variety of people. But what we're doing is we decided to release it early so that people can get access to and play with it, and we can build it with the community. We have a big roadmap, fully published, being transparent about this. And a lot of people are involved in this stuff. And so what we're doing is we're really optimizing for building this thing the right way and building it the right way. It's interesting working with the community, because everybody wants it yesterday."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "And so sometimes it's kind of, you know, there's some dynamics there, but I think it's the right thing. So there's a discord also. So the dynamics is pretty interesting. Sometimes the community probably can be very chaotic and introduce a lot of stress. Guido famously quit over the stress of the wall of his operator. I mean, it broke, maybe that would be, yeah, exactly. And so like, it could be very stressful to develop, but can you just tangent upon a tangent? Is it stressful to work through the design of various features here, given that the community is so richly involved?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's, you know, it broke. It probably broke the camel's back. Exactly. So I've been doing open development and community stuff for decades now. Somehow this has happened to me. So I've learned some tricks, but the thing that always gets me is I want to make people happy. Right? And so this is maybe not all people all happy all the time, but generally I want people to be happy. Right? And so the challenge is that, again, we're tapping into some long, some deep seated long tensions and pressures, both in the Python world, but also in the AI world and the hardware world and things like this. And so people just want us to move faster, right? And so again, our decision was let's release this early. Let's get people used to it or access to it and play with it and like, let's build in the open, which we could have had the language monk sitting in the cloister up on the hilltop, like beavering away trying to build something. But in my experience, you get something that's way better if you work with the community. And so yes, it can be frustrating and can be challenging for lots of people involved. And, you know, if you, I mean, if you mentioned our Discord, we have over 10,000 people on the Discord, 11,000 people or something. Keep in mind we released Mojo like two weeks ago. So it's very active. So it's very cool. But what that means is that, you know, 10, 11,000 people all will want something different. And so what we've done is we've tried to say, okay, cool, here's our roadmap. The roadmap isn't completely arbitrary. It's based on here's the logical order in which to build these features or add these capabilities and things like that. And what we've done is we've spun really fast on bug fixes. And so we actually have very few bugs, which is cool. I mean, actually for a project in the state, but then what we're doing is we're dropping in features very deliberately. I mean, this is cool."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I mean, this is fun to watch because you got the two gigantic communities of like hardware like systems engineers, and then you have the machine learning Python people that are like higher level. Yeah."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "And it's just too like for like army like they've been at war. Yeah. Yeah. Sure. Right. And so here's a test. It's like a Tolkien novel or something. Okay. So here's the test. And again, like it's super funny for something that's only been out for two weeks, right? People are so impatient, right? But okay, cool. Let's fast forward a year. Like in a year's time, Mojo will be actually quite amazing and solve tons of problems and be very good. People still have these problems, right? And so you look at this and you say, and the way I look at this at least is to say, okay,"
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "well, we're solving big, longstanding problems, right? And so here's a test. It's like a Tolkien novel or something."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Okay. To me, I, again, working on many different problems, I want to make sure we do it right. Right? There's like a responsibility feel because if you mess it up, right, there's very few opportunities to do projects like this and have them really have impact on the world. If we do it right, then maybe we can take those feuding armies and actually heal some of those wounds."
}
] | 381-chris-lattner-future-of-programming-and-ai-7 |
[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah. Right? Yeah. I mean, this is like a speech by George Washington or Abraham Lincoln or something."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "And you look at this and it's like, okay, well, how different are we? Yeah. We all want beautiful things. We all want something that's nice. We all want to be able to work together. We all want our stuff to be used, right? And so if we can help heal that, now I'm not optimistic that all people will use Mojo and they'll stop using C++. Like, that's not my goal. Right? But if we can heal some of that, I think that'd be pretty cool."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah. Yeah. And we start by putting the people who like braces into the gulag. No."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "So, so there are, so there are proposals for adding braces to Mojo and we just tell them no. Okay."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Delightly. Yeah. Anyway, so there's a lot of amazing features on the roadmap and those ready to implement it. It'd be awesome. I can just ask you a few things. Yeah. Go for it. So, the, the other performance improvement comes from immutability. So what's the, what's this var and this let thing that we got going on?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "What's immutability? Yeah. So, one of the things that is useful and it's not always required, but it's useful is knowing whether something can change out from underneath you. Right? And so in Python you have a pointer to an array, right? And so you pass that pointer to an array around to things. If you pass into a function, they may take that and scroll away in some other data structure. And so you get your array back and you go to use it and now somebody else is like putting stuff in your array. Yeah. How do you reason about that? It can be very complicated and at least lots of bugs, right? And so one of the things that, you know, again, this is not something Mojo forces on you, but something that Mojo enables is a thing called value semantics. And what value semantics do is they take collections like arrays, like dictionaries, also tensors and strings and things like this that are much higher level and make them behave like proper values. And so it makes it look like if you pass these things around, you get a logical copy of all the data. And so if I pass you an array, it's your array. You can go do what you want to it. You're not going to hurt my array. Now that is an interesting and very powerful design principle, defines away a ton of bugs. You have to be careful to implement it in an efficient way."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "Yeah."
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "Is there a performance hit that's significant? Generally not. If you implement it the right way, but it requires a lot of very low level getting the language right bits."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "I assume there'd be a huge performance hit because it's a really, the benefit is really"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "nice because you don't get into the complex. Absolutely. Well, the trick is you can't do copies. So you have to provide the behavior of copying without doing the copy. Yeah."
},
{
"from": "human",
"value": "How do you do that?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "How do you do that? It's not magic. It's just, it's actually pretty cool. Well, so first, before we talk about how that works, let's talk about how it works in Python. So in Python, you define a person class or maybe a person class is a bad idea. You define a database class, right? The database class has an array of records, something like that. And so the problem is, is that if you pass in a record or a class instance into database, it'll take a hold of that object and then it assumes it has it. And if you're passing an object in, you have to know that that database is going to take it. And therefore you shouldn't change it after you put in the database. This is the problem. You just kind of have to know that. You just have to kind of know that, right? And so you roll out version 1 of the database, you just kind of have to know that. Of course, Lex uses its own database, right? Yeah. Right? Because you built it. You understand how this works, right? Somebody else joins the team. They don't know this. Yes. Right? And so now they suddenly get bugs. You're having to maintain the database. You shake your fist. Mm-hmm. You argue the tenth time this happens. You're like, okay, we have to do something different, right? And so what you do is you go change your Python code and you change your database class to copy the record every time you add it. And so what ends up happening is you say, okay, I will do what's called a defensive copy inside the database. And then that way, if somebody passes something in, I will have my own copy of it. And they can go do whatever, and they're not going to break my thing. Okay. This is usually the two design patterns. If you look in PyTorch, for example, this is cloning a tensor. There's a specific thing, and you have to know where to call it. And if you don't call in the right place, you get these bugs, and this is state of the art, right? Right? Yeah. So a different approach. So it's used in many languages. So I work with it in Swift. As you say, okay, well, let's provide value semantics. And so we want to provide the view that you get a logically independent copy. But we want to do that lazily. And so what we do is we say, okay, if you pass something into a function, it doesn't actually make a copy. What it actually does is it just increments the reference to it. And if you pass it around, you stick in your database, they can go into the database. You own it. And then you come back out of the stack, nobody has copied anything. You come back out of the stack and then the caller lets go of it. Well, then you've just handed it off to the database. you've transferred it, and there's no copies made. Now on the other hand, if your coworker goes and hands you a record and you pass it in, you stick it in the database, and then you go to town and you start modifying it, what happens is you get a copy lazily on demand. And so what this does is gives you copies only when you need them, so it defines away"
}
] | 381-chris-lattner-future-of-programming-and-ai-8 |
Intro
This dataset represents a compilation of audio-to-text transcripts from the Lex Fridman Podcast. The Lex Fridman Podcast, hosted by AI researcher at MIT, Lex Fridman, is a deep dive into a broad range of topics that touch on science, technology, history, philosophy, and the nature of intelligence, consciousness, love, and power. The guests on the podcast are drawn from a diverse range of fields, providing unique and insightful perspectives on these subjects.
The dataset has been formatted in ShareGPT format for use with conversational large language models (LLMs) like Vicuna, WizardVicuna, etc.
This dataset can be an invaluable resource for training and refining language models, offering a rich source of nuanced, intellectual, and thought-provoking dialogue. Furthermore, the diversity of topics covered provides a broad spectrum of language usage, idiomatic expressions, and subject matter expertise.
3 versions
- _original: original dataset where each item is an entire episode
- _chunked: chunked dataset where episodes are formated into chunks of approximately 1200 words(roughly < 2048 tokens)
- _chunked_gpt: change "lex" & "guest" to "human" & "gpt" in _chunked dataset to fit Vicuna training
What I did
- Fetch all episode links of Lex Fridman Podcast
- For each episode, transform the transcript in html to json format (Vicuna ShareGPT format)
- remove the first few sentences from Lex for each episode to remove the introduction and ads.
Problems & Concerns
- These are audio-to-text transcriptions, which contain inaccurate detections
- Although the speakers are professionals, these are verbal conversations which contain oral languages
- The dataset may contain ads and personal opinions from Lex Fridman and the speakers
- more ...
Next Steps
- finetune LLaMA, WizardVicuna, Vicuna models using this dataset
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