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null
null
JesusofTorn
null
None
null
null
null
1330907556
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
qhtmu
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qhtmu
null
3
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qhtmu/tifu_by_destroying_a_brand_new_200_a_t_tyre/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
6
null
null
I was working on my dad's Land Rover, he needed a bit of bumper grinding off for better ground clearance off road. I did the left side no problem because the wheels were on full right lock. Went round to the right side, started griding and suddenly, I heard a massive bang and the car started sinking, looked at the tyre, and there was a nice, neat slice right across the inner sidewall. I hadn't turned the wheel to full left lock and I'd just put an angle grinder blade through it.
null
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null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU by destroying a brand new £200 A/ T tyre
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qhtmu/tifu_by_destroying_a_brand_new_200_a_t_tyre/
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null
null
null
null
null
LadyLurksAlot
null
None
null
null
null
1330907003
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
qht8j
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qht8j
null
3
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qht8j/tifu_realized_my_pizza_was_done_kept_surfing/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
9
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null
I was re-heating my pizza in the oven, and could tell by smell it was done. "Okay, just this last link..." Finally the smell of charcoal caught my attention. Dammit, Reddit. A couple bites were still edible, but most of it was too hardened to even bite into.
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: Realized my pizza was done; kept surfing reddit until it was burnt.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qht8j/tifu_realized_my_pizza_was_done_kept_surfing/
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null
null
null
null
thecampo
null
None
null
null
null
1331064262
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
qkkyg
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qkkyg
null
2
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qkkyg/tifu_when_i_made_coffee_put_in_the_sugar_went_to/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
1
null
null
forgot and put in more sugar.... And that was the last of the coffee....
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU When I made coffee put in the sugar went to grab the cream.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qkkyg/tifu_when_i_made_coffee_put_in_the_sugar_went_to/
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null
null
null
null
null
b0w3n
null
None
null
null
null
1331055614
null
None
self.tifu
True
null
False
null
qkdy6
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qkdy6
null
70
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qkdy6/i_went_to_fart_discreetly_at_my_desk_at_work_i/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
219
null
null
title says it all
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null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
I went to fart discreetly at my desk at work. I shit my pants and stained the chair.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qkdy6/i_went_to_fart_discreetly_at_my_desk_at_work_i/
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null
null
null
null
null
Illpackallama
null
None
null
null
null
1331050390
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
qk9wx
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qk9wx
null
5
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qk9wx/lnifu_was_eating_dinner_and_nose_started_to_itch/
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null
null
null
null
null
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15
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null
I was talking to my wife at dinner last night, and my nose began to itch on the inside. Not really thinking, I proceeded to use the fork to scratch the inside of my nose, and then continued to eat. Meanwhile my wife is giving me a horrified look from across the table. It took a good 10 seconds to realize what I had just done. I'm ashamed of myself. And the fork will never be the same again.
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
LNIFU Was eating dinner and nose started to itch, so I scratched it with my fork and kept eating.
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null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qk9wx/lnifu_was_eating_dinner_and_nose_started_to_itch/
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null
null
null
null
null
bnm3424
null
None
null
null
null
1331017829
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
qjvlu
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qjvlu
null
7
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qjvlu/ifuo_a_necklace_leads_to_what_was_probably_a/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
30
null
null
While getting ready for my first date I was putting on a necklace. At the time I had really long hair and so, I flipped my head over to do the clasp, at which point I knocked my head off of the bed post. I landed in my desk chair, not on purpose, and was very confused about how I had gotten there... Got up, flipped my head again and fell on to the bed... decided to get my mom to put on the necklace. I suffered major fatigue on my date and nearly passed out in the July heat on a couple of occasions. I had my first real kiss with my first "serious" high school boyfriend with a MASSIVE headache due to what was probably a minor concussion.
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
IFUO; A necklace leads to what was probably a minor concussion.
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qjvlu/ifuo_a_necklace_leads_to_what_was_probably_a/
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null
null
null
null
null
Insanitybeat
null
None
null
null
null
1330998012
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
qjgqh
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qjgqh
null
1
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qjgqh/tifu_by_looking_at_this_subreddit_its_not_what/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
0
null
null
I laugh hysterically every time I see this, so everyone in the same room as me thinks I might be insane.
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null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU by looking at this subreddit... it's not what you think.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qjgqh/tifu_by_looking_at_this_subreddit_its_not_what/
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null
null
null
null
null
kyleswimmer87
null
None
null
null
null
1330994803
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
qje4z
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qje4z
null
0
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qje4z/tifu_went_to_hit_my_friend_with_a_snowball_hit_is/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
4
null
null
He hid my school bag under a wooden crate, then told me another friend showed up and ran off with it to the sports building. I come back after an hour of frantic searching with a solid ball of ice from holding and packing a foot wide snow ball between my hands for the last hour. I went to shove it down his shirt when I found out he was the culprit and he knocked it out of my hands and it exploded, with about 30% of it landing on his laptop keyboard. He immediately stood up and punched me in the gut. Followed by a blue screen of death upon restart. An hour later we made up when his laptop started to work again... Although I can't say I blame him for the punch, he did kinda deserve the snowball and I call it net-even tl;dr... Aimed a snowball at a deserving friend, exploded and hit his laptop and he thumped me.
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU - Went to hit my friend with a snowball, hit is laptop and up popped the blue screen of death, followed by getting punched.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qje4z/tifu_went_to_hit_my_friend_with_a_snowball_hit_is/
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null
null
null
null
[deleted]
null
None
null
null
null
1331159131
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
qmdcw
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qmdcw
null
17
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qmdcw/tifu_plumber_working_on_my_pipes_told_us_not_to/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
78
null
null
Fuck. I'm hiding and am scared to confront him.
null
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null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU. Plumber working on my pipes, told us not to flush any toilets. Completely forgot and took a piss and flushed the toilet. He's face down in a hole then all of a sudden he gets covered in toilet water and piss.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qmdcw/tifu_plumber_working_on_my_pipes_told_us_not_to/
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null
null
null
null
null
actually_a_wolf
null
None
null
null
null
1331146254
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
qm2jr
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qm2jr
null
5
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qm2jr/tifu_and_crashed_someone_elses_bike_into_a_car/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
19
null
null
i'm short, and my friend is of average height. i went to borrow her bike so i could ride with my friend to the campus center to pick up food. i forgot that i am short. my legs barely reached the pedals and i ended up losing control of the bike and crashing it into a parked car in the parking lot outside of my dorm. i hit my head on the handlebars and gave myself one hell of a headache. still got food, though.
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU and crashed someone else's bike into a car
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qm2jr/tifu_and_crashed_someone_elses_bike_into_a_car/
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null
null
null
null
null
ikifoo
null
None
null
null
null
1331134656
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
qltg8
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qltg8
null
12
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qltg8/tifu_set_a_floppy_disc_drive_on_fire/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
99
null
null
I was re-assembling an old computer. Plugged in the floppy drive and turned the computer on to witness a bright red light and smoke. Turns out if you put the power plug in upside-down, you get fire. In my defence... it was an old drive which actually let you plug the power in upside-down, (no guard on the port) no indication of which way it should go, it was dark inside the case and I wasn't paying much attention - it wasn't worth a lot of money or anything. The SECOND time was out of sheer stupidity.
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU... set a floppy disc drive on fire.
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qltg8/tifu_set_a_floppy_disc_drive_on_fire/
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null
null
null
null
null
starrynightgirl
null
None
null
null
null
1331085077
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
ql1ok
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_ql1ok
null
10
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/ql1ok/tifu_i_yelled_at_my_father_for_picking_up_my/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
3
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null
I dont care that he wanted to greet my boyfriend, I really really really hate when someone picks up my phone calls and starts to have conversations with people that wanted to talk to ME. It makes me feel like my privacy was being violated. I REALLY let him have it. He was shocked at how angry I was and left the apartment without saying a word. I don't think he's coming back. I feel so cruel. Even my sister came up and told me how over the line I got with him. I am just so angry on the inside. but I know I really really fucked up and I now I feel so stupid.
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU I yelled at my father for picking up my phone calls and he left the apt sadden
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/ql1ok/tifu_i_yelled_at_my_father_for_picking_up_my/
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null
null
null
null
null
[deleted]
null
None
null
null
null
1331082509
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
qkzko
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qkzko
null
0
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qkzko/tifu_i_opened_my_reeces_over_the_trash_can_to/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
1
null
null
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU I opened my reeces over the trash can to easily throw away the wrapper and my reeces went in the trash.
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qkzko/tifu_i_opened_my_reeces_over_the_trash_can_to/
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null
null
null
null
null
JesusofTorn
null
None
null
null
null
1331416371
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
qqqd8
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qqqd8
null
4
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qqqd8/tifu_by_nearly_drowning_myself_in_greasy_toxic/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
40
null
null
I was cleaning my oven with a big bowl of water and chemical degreaser, my phone went off which made me jump, knocked myself out on the roof of the oven and landed face first in the bowl of water, woke up about 10-15 seconds later coughing up water and puking cos of the chemicals and grease.
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null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: By nearly drowning myself in greasy, toxic water.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qqqd8/tifu_by_nearly_drowning_myself_in_greasy_toxic/
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null
null
null
null
null
Ran4
null
None
null
null
null
1331409756
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
qqlsp
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qqlsp
null
19
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qqlsp/tifu_i_left_potatoes_in_the_dark_for_a_month_now/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
19
null
null
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: I left potatoes in the dark for a month. Now I'm afraid of potatoes.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qqlsp/tifu_i_left_potatoes_in_the_dark_for_a_month_now/
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null
null
null
null
null
canipaybycheck
null
None
null
null
null
1331399724
null
moderator
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
qqf96
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qqf96
null
15
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qqf96/announcement_the_fuckup_of_the_week/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
71
null
null
We are happy to announce the introduction of the "Fuck-up of the Week". Flair reading something along the lines of "Fucked up bad" will be given on Sunday to the user who is deemed to have fucked up the worst in the past week, and they will keep this flair for the next week.
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
Announcement: The Fuck-up of the Week
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qqf96/announcement_the_fuckup_of_the_week/
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null
null
null
null
null
siiika1
null
None
null
null
null
1331358994
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
qpzs0
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qpzs0
null
24
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qpzs0/tifu_took_a_dump_so_huge_that_it_wouldnt_flush/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
102
null
null
Actually, my roommate did this, not me. She proceeded to tell me about it while leaving the apartment and I sat in gaping astonishment while she recounted her desperate situation. She was late for school and couldn't think of another solution. I asked her if she destroyed the knife by throwing it into the volcano in Mordor; she responded that she used "hot" water to clean it. Added that she didn't use the serrated edge to make sure no shit got stuck in the teeth. Still no idea which knife it was or if it's still in the kitchen drawer. fml
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: Took a dump so huge that it wouldn't flush down the toilet... had to use a butter knife to cut it down to size.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qpzs0/tifu_took_a_dump_so_huge_that_it_wouldnt_flush/
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null
null
null
null
null
ez617
null
None
null
null
null
1331498922
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
qrwvj
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qrwvj
null
40
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qrwvj/tifu_when_i_locked_myself_out_of_the_house_im/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
91
null
null
I'm housesitting and dogsitting this weekend. I locked the handle of the door to the backyard last night because I couldn't figure out the deadbolt; when I let their dogs out this morning, I didn't unlock the handle. So I went out and threw the dogs' toys around for about 15 minutes, decided it was too cold and went to go inside to get a jacket. Of course, the door was locked. I was stuck outside without a phone, car keys, a jacket, or money.
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU when I locked myself out of the house I'm housesitting
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qrwvj/tifu_when_i_locked_myself_out_of_the_house_im/
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null
null
null
null
null
lov3disshit
null
None
null
null
null
1331488574
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
qrpgj
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qrpgj
null
31
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qrpgj/tifu_when_i_downloaded_the_windows_8_consumer/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
32
null
null
I was having problems with adobe, so i wanted to just uninstall it and go back to windows 7... apparently you have to re-download all of windows 7. Which I didn't install originally to begin with :(
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t5_2to41
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TIFU when i downloaded the windows 8 consumer preview.
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http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qrpgj/tifu_when_i_downloaded_the_windows_8_consumer/
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canipaybycheck
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None
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1331448967
null
moderator
reddit.com
False
null
False
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qradr
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null
null
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null
null
False
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null
None
{}
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t3_qradr
null
0
null
False
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/r/tifu/comments/qradr/congrats_rtifu_you_are_featured_in_rweeklyreddit/
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44
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t5_2to41
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null
Congrats, r/tifu - You are featured in r/weeklyreddit!
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http://www.reddit.com/r/weeklyreddit/comments/qr9xr/week12_mar_5mar_11/
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scraggz111
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None
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1331587725
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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qthua
null
null
null
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null
null
True
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None
{}
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t3_qthua
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9
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qthua/tifu_woke_up_hungover_went_to_take_a_leak_started/
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62
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Woke up at a girls place desperate for a piss still feeling a bit wasted. I'm not sure if I'm feeling sick or if I'm hungry so I ignore it. Half way through and suddenly I start heaving which causes my entire body to convulse which, in turn, causes me to swing my wang all over the place spraying most of the bathroom in piss while covering the rest of it in vomit.
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t5_2to41
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TIFU. Woke up hungover went to take a leak started vomming mid stream.
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qthua/tifu_woke_up_hungover_went_to_take_a_leak_started/
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NickTheHalfling
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None
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1331531918
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None
self.tifu
False
null
False
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qskf5
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null
null
null
null
True
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null
None
{}
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t3_qskf5
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15
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False
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/r/tifu/comments/qskf5/tifu_when_i_cooked_a_plate_instead_of_a_tortilla/
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60
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null
Long story short, I went to heat a tortilla over my stove, grabbed a plastic plate instead.
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t5_2to41
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null
TIFU when I cooked a plate instead of a tortilla.
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qskf5/tifu_when_i_cooked_a_plate_instead_of_a_tortilla/
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naemly
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None
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1331523745
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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qsf89
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True
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None
{}
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t3_qsf89
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16
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False
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/r/tifu/comments/qsf89/tifu_went_to_piss_foreskin_got_in_the_way_stood/
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22
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t5_2to41
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TIFU - went to piss, foreskin got in the way, stood there stunned while piss sprayed everywhere except the toilet
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qsf89/tifu_went_to_piss_foreskin_got_in_the_way_stood/
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Insanitybeat
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None
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1331517752
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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qsap6
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null
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null
True
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null
None
{}
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t3_qsap6
null
6
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False
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/r/tifu/comments/qsap6/tifu_by_spraying_water_in_my_face/
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1
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I was washing a car (yes, I have to do chores, unlike you circlejerkers) and I was about to pick up the hose and spray the side of the vehicle to wash the soap off and I somehow pointed the hose at me and sprayed myself in the face... and I had glasses on. It was like the comical moment in old cartoons where the hunter is trying to shoot the rabbit, but the barrel of his gun turns toward him and shoots him in the face. TL;DR: tried to wash soap off of vehicle, sprayed myself in the face while wearing glasses.
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t5_2to41
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TIFU by spraying water in my face...
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qsap6/tifu_by_spraying_water_in_my_face/
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kingmema
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None
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1331511578
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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qs67r
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null
null
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null
null
True
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None
{}
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t3_qs67r
null
0
null
False
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/r/tifu/comments/qs67r/tifu_by_waking_up_still_drunk_from_last_night_and/
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4
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My poor furniture.
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t5_2to41
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null
TIFU by waking up still drunk from last night and having to move house.
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qs67r/tifu_by_waking_up_still_drunk_from_last_night_and/
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kayjaykay
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None
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1331658777
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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qurn9
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null
True
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null
None
{}
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t3_qurn9
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17
null
False
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/r/tifu/comments/qurn9/tifu_couldnt_figure_out_why_everything_was_so/
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91
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null
...I was still wearing my glasses. In the shower.
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t5_2to41
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null
TIFU Couldn't figure out why everything was so steamy...
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qurn9/tifu_couldnt_figure_out_why_everything_was_so/
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T_cubed
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None
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1331688459
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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qvgwa
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null
null
null
null
null
True
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null
None
{}
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t3_qvgwa
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14
null
False
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/r/tifu/comments/qvgwa/tifu_by_tripping_at_the_finish_line/
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41
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null
I run the 400m dash in my junior high track team. As I was nearing the finish line I lost my balance and tripped over it. I heard the entire crowd cringe at the sight of me face planting into the ground. I ran it in 60 seconds, one second away from getting a ribbon.
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t5_2to41
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null
TIFU by tripping at the finish line
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null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qvgwa/tifu_by_tripping_at_the_finish_line/
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notcleverchris
null
None
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null
1331854488
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
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qyk1u
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
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null
None
{}
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t3_qyk1u
null
12
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qyk1u/tifu_making_a_good_first_impression/
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41
null
null
So today during lunch at my high school, I was talking with my friend and we were having a laugh. Two of his friends, whom I have never met came up and said what's up. I recognized one of them from my math class and gave him a handshake. Then his black friend held out his hand saying Hello. Meanwhile I was still chuckling at my friend, so without really thinking i shook his hand as he said, "hey my name's Aaron". So for what reason i don't know, just staring at his hand i say, " Hi, i'm black"... I'M WHITE. GOD DAMNIT. so i just walked away really fast. hahahaha
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU making a good first impression
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qyk1u/tifu_making_a_good_first_impression/
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Jenewein
null
None
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null
1331934634
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
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qzzl2
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
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null
None
{}
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t3_qzzl2
null
12
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qzzl2/tifu_when_i_didnt_act_more_crazy_when_they_were/
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null
null
null
null
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60
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null
I should've spent less time talking about my college experience and more about how I spend all day on a website trying to be funny so I can get imaginary points.
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t5_2to41
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null
null
null
TIFU when I didn't act more crazy when they were picking who was gonna get picked at jury duty.
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qzzl2/tifu_when_i_didnt_act_more_crazy_when_they_were/
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null
[deleted]
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None
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1331924164
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None
self.tifu
True
null
False
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qzqzq
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_qzqzq
null
4
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qzqzq/tifu_by_accidentally_telling_the_university/
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14
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null
I corrected it immediately after but I think he think's I'm retarded now...assuming he remembered more than 5 seconds later... Edit: and the bonus is that friends tell me he's one of the rare types who manages to remember people
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t5_2to41
null
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null
TIFU by accidentally telling the university president I had a different major out of nervousness
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qzqzq/tifu_by_accidentally_telling_the_university/
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SnizzPants
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None
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null
1331909347
null
None
self.tifu
False
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False
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qzf3r
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
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null
None
{}
null
t3_qzf3r
null
33
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/qzf3r/tifu_have_been_putting_all_my_sweaty_shitty_semen/
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44
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null
I actually keep doing this. I'm traveling so I constantly have a bag of gross nasty underwear in a bag. And I always need it compact and for the life of me I cannot remember that when I fold up the bag all the air just smashes me in the face. I got pink eye two weeks ago and I'm actually JUST realizing now that it might be from this...
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t5_2to41
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null
TIFU Have been putting all my sweaty, shitty, semen stained underwear in a bag. In order to make the bag more compact I squeezed out all the air that's been sitting in there, into my face.
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qzf3r/tifu_have_been_putting_all_my_sweaty_shitty_semen/
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iwaskhazard
null
None
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1331856976
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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qym3e
null
null
null
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null
True
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None
{}
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t3_qym3e
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5
null
False
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/r/tifu/comments/qym3e/tifu_my_girlfriend_was_way_too_horny/
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0
null
null
and (thinking her period was over) we got it on in my bathroom. i didn't realize she was still bleeding and i've never experienced that before. i pulled out and there was blood everywhere. it smelt pretty bad too.
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t5_2to41
null
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null
TIFU- my girlfriend was way too horny,
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/qym3e/tifu_my_girlfriend_was_way_too_horny/
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crober11
null
None
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null
1332025499
null
None
self.tifu
True
null
False
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r1cjy
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null
True
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None
{}
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t3_r1cjy
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8
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r1cjy/tifu_almost_gave_myself_a_blackeye/
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43
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null
Woke up in the morning after having slept with my arm under the pillow. Tried to get up, found my arm literally unresponsive. Laying on my stomach, with a slight smile I picked it up to a 90 degree angle with my other hand and proceeded to let it go.. and watch it drop towards my face. Took me a little too long to realize that I was unable to stop it. Punched myself in the eye, surprisingly hard. Fffffuuuuuu...Bad way to start the day.
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t5_2to41
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null
TIFU: Almost gave myself a black-eye.
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r1cjy/tifu_almost_gave_myself_a_blackeye/
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kinda_alone
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None
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null
1332011453
null
moderator
self.tifu
True
null
False
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r13hq
null
null
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null
null
True
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None
{}
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t3_r13hq
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23
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r13hq/possible_logo_ideas/
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27
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null
We have had a couple of logo submissions. What do you guys think? [Option 1](http://dl.dropbox.com/u/9119917/tifu.gif) submitted by Left-Hand-Path [Option 2](http://i.imgur.com/j0wU3.png) submitted by SaltyChristian Also I would like to introduce two new Mods: SaltyChristian and rya11111 Edit: Option two is more of a ad Here is another [option](http://i.imgur.com/XUCbM.png) submitted by moderator000. We sincerely apologize for the delay in posting his.
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t5_2to41
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null
Possible Logo Ideas
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http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r13hq/possible_logo_ideas/
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Jinjiro
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None
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1332061077
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
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r1ve1
null
null
null
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null
null
True
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None
{}
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t3_r1ve1
null
5
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r1ve1/tifu_by_faceplanting_the_ground/
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31
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null
I kind of have a double jointer shoulder than I can use my entire arm as a pillow.. (Right hand elbow on left side of face with arm stretching down behind left arm) I fell asleep like this and when I awoke my arm from the shoulder down was half asleep, could move but not feel a thing.. Tried to lift myself up and my sleepy arm gave way under my weight.. Smashed my face into the ground..
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU by faceplanting the ground.
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r1ve1/tifu_by_faceplanting_the_ground/
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rustolui
null
None
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null
1332054988
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
r1tgo
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
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null
None
{}
null
t3_r1tgo
null
0
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r1tgo/tifu_got_drunk_a_fraternity_started_a_smoker_just/
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null
null
null
0
null
null
This happened a few weeks back..but since I discovered this subreddit today I thought in sharing this stupid story. It all happened basically me just with like 3 or 4 bucks in my pocket, got only 4 one dollar beer cans, then a friend of mine came to the bar with plenty of liquor in his trunk, johnny walker to be exact..black label, seriously who says "no"to free alcohol for fuck sake, I grab that bottle and started going at it, then completely drunk... out of a curios question about the fraternity he was in..they started a smoker ..offering me more drinks..and cigarettes, through all their talking and explaining their brotherhood as they called it, all I was thinking was "how the fuck will I be able to get up from this fucking chair" after a few acts of courage I stand up..and started walking away, well, stumbling away..my friend told me they stood there asking themselves wtf happened...and to never address to them again. thing was..I'm part of another organization. had a lot of explaining to do.
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t5_2to41
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null
[TIFU] Got drunk, a fraternity started a smoker just because of a curious question I made, left them halfway drunk as fuck.
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http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r1tgo/tifu_got_drunk_a_fraternity_started_a_smoker_just/
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[deleted]
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None
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1332051955
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None
self.tifu
False
null
False
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r1s3v
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null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
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t3_r1s3v
null
0
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r1s3v/tifu_i_spent_money_when_i_shouldnt_have_and_then/
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null
null
null
0
null
null
iTunes is having a DRM-free upgrade sale on albums I've already purchased. $3, and many of these albums I had lost years ago. I figured I'd get one that I really wanted, but I grabbed the wrong one ($3), got the right one (now at $6). Then saw two other albums that totalled $5 (at $11). I disabled my payment on iTunes so I won't do it again but I feel really terrible about spending that when I'm supposed to be saving every penny. I got laid off this week, and I'm moving in two weeks.
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t5_2to41
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null
null
null
TIFU I spent money when I shouldn't have! And then accidently bought the wrong thing.
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r1s3v/tifu_i_spent_money_when_i_shouldnt_have_and_then/
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Cr6433
null
None
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null
null
1332033552
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
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r1hig
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
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t3_r1hig
null
25
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r1hig/tifu_i_answered_my_cell_phone_at_work/
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19
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null
So i work at our towns local YMCA and i am staff at the Youth center building,so, i open up no kids waiting to get in or anything, then i get a phone call from my good friend ( we toke together ) and starts asking if i wanna come over and smoke with him, and i was thinking hell yeah free weed, and it gives me a chance to try my new bong. so i said "Yeah man, i'll come over after work and bring this new bong i just got and we can blaze up." and as all of that was said i failed to notice the door open and my boss come in. and he was just staring at me he had heard everthing.
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t5_2to41
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null
TIFU: I answered my cell phone at work...
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r1hig/tifu_i_answered_my_cell_phone_at_work/
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GOB224
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None
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null
1332200933
null
None
self.tifu
True
null
False
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r48v6
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null
null
null
True
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None
{}
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t3_r48v6
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22
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r48v6/tifu_by_driving_20_hours_to_go_camping_and/
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210
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null
A few college friends and I drove from Massachusetts to Tennessee to camp in the smokey mountains. After about 20 hours of driving, we arrive and unpack to find that the tent was still at home. We ended up buying one but it leaked in the rain so we slept in the car Edit: Oh by the way, the next day we saw a double rainbow. all the way across the sky. No lie.
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t5_2to41
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null
TIFU by driving 20+ hours to go camping and forgetting my tent.
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r48v6/tifu_by_driving_20_hours_to_go_camping_and/
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[deleted]
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None
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1332191750
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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r40v5
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null
null
null
null
null
True
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null
None
{}
null
t3_r40v5
null
3
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r40v5/tifu_is_it_suppose_to_be_ironic_that_check_out/
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0
null
null
Is there some way to get rid of it or will it always just be chilling annoying the hell out of me. blocks half the title of whatever is at the top of the page, and any thread i open. so if its at the top, and i open it, i double cant read it
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t5_2to41
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null
TIFU is it suppose to be ironic that "check out the new fuck of of the week!" is blocking half the titles of threads i open? Today YOU fucked up
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r40v5/tifu_is_it_suppose_to_be_ironic_that_check_out/
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[deleted]
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None
null
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null
1332165563
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
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r3fu1
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
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null
None
{}
null
t3_r3fu1
null
13
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r3fu1/tifu_by_pissing_in_the_trash_can/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
39
null
null
After coming home from a fantastic party, I was of course drunk. I realized I had to piss, and went straight for the trash can. I only realized it wasn't the toilet after I was done.
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU by pissing in the trash can..
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r3fu1/tifu_by_pissing_in_the_trash_can/
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null
null
null
null
null
CodyCarlile
null
None
null
null
null
1332127903
null
None
self.tifu
True
null
False
null
r2y9e
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_r2y9e
null
15
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r2y9e/tifu_by_not_eating_the_vitamin/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
20
null
null
Well actually this happened like a week ago, but it still fucking sucked. Anyway my brother and u were walking out of gamestop at the mall and saw that for some reason the vitamin store across from it had put out a sample of something called "B-12" so we each got one and i waited for my brother to eat his first. I saw by his facial expression that it tasted terrible so i just put it in my jacket pocket to throw away later. I completly forget about it the next day and go to school as usual. I notice during school its gone and figure it fell out. When i get picked up by my mom she is unusually quiet so i ask "whats wrong?" she replys with "i found something in your pocket..." And then she starts crying so i explain how it was a vitamin and how my brother took one too. I then realize my story sounds terrible and my brother and i now look like pill poppers to my mom.
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU by not eating the vitamin
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r2y9e/tifu_by_not_eating_the_vitamin/
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null
Thisguy92
null
None
null
null
null
1332126400
null
None
self.tifu
True
null
False
null
r2x5g
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_r2x5g
null
17
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r2x5g/tifu_by_throwing_urine_into_my_own_face/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
91
null
null
I drunkenly decided to wee in a glass as it was easier than going to the toilet in my state of inhebriation. As i went to throw said effluvia out of my window, a window which is best described as a rickety victorian contraption that is a meter and a half high and opens like a set of double doors, I opened one side of the window and leant on the other. As soon as i put my full force behind the piss chucking motion, the closed portion of the window that i was leaning on promptly gave way, leading me to jerk forward and throw a concoction of whiskey infused micturation into my face. Sort of just froze for 20 seconds with my eyes closed and piss dripping down my face thinking, "what the fuck did i just do?"
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU by throwing urine into my own face.
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r2x5g/tifu_by_throwing_urine_into_my_own_face/
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null
null
null
null
null
andieOO7
null
None
null
null
null
1332235752
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
r4vmq
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_r4vmq
null
9
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r4vmq/tifu_walked_into_a_tree/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
34
null
null
I was listening to music and saw this really hot guy walking down the street behind me, walking his dog. I always see this guy in the neighborhood, but sadly found out he is taken. ANYWAYS, I turned around to look at him and next thing I know, I'm just in a state of utter confusion. I'm on the floor, my books sprawled everywhere. Turns out I had walked dead on into a freakin' tree while looking back at him. And people driving by saw the whole thing. Hope he didn't. =/
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU walked into a tree
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r4vmq/tifu_walked_into_a_tree/
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null
[deleted]
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None
null
null
null
1332230677
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
r4twz
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_r4twz
null
35
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r4twz/tifu_and_punched_my_boyfriend_in_the_eye/
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null
null
null
null
null
116
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null
he was laying on my chest, just like a lady would do to a guy but the opposite. I told him not to tickle my armpit... we had just gone through an intense 15 minute tickle fight and he went to move his head and I thought he was going to tickle my armpit by "nomming" it. I was wrong. he just moved his head and I flinched to keep him off of my armpit and missed his forehead and gave him a black eye. he told everyone I beat him.
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: and punched my boyfriend in the eye
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r4twz/tifu_and_punched_my_boyfriend_in_the_eye/
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null
null
null
null
69swaglord420
null
None
null
null
null
1332211780
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
r4i66
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_r4i66
null
17
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r4i66/tifu_the_fail_poop_to_end_all_fail_poops/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
58
null
null
This wasn't today, but it was last year in the dead of winter when I was going to Raleigh to visit my sister. Me and my family Decided to stop at PF changs to get some dinner and then go to the dicks sporting goods right across the street. As I walked inside I immediately noticed that my intestines were ready to release the cracken of all poops unto the nearest toilet, so I rushed to the bathroom. Once inside the only stall I noticed multiple poop stains on the seat mixed with pee. I decided the only way to crunch town was by a standing pro poop. I stood up and bent over, while hoping for a solid nug to drop when all of a sudden a diarrhea jet stream of general changs chicken goes every where, and I mean everywhere at this point I had literally pooped on top of the toilet, on the flusher, on the seat of the toilet, and then just finished unloading the initial rush of poo on the floor(I literally only got about 1/5 of my poop in the toilet). I immediatly got my parents and told them we had to leave because I was sick. And to this day I still feel guilty over who had to clean up my poop. tl;dr I pooped everywhere but the toilet in dicks sporting goods
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: The fail poop to end all fail poops
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r4i66/tifu_the_fail_poop_to_end_all_fail_poops/
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null
null
null
null
null
justme_3774
null
None
null
null
null
1332204844
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
r4c72
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_r4c72
null
11
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r4c72/tifu_by_letting_myself_run_a_two_mile_race_dammit/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
4
null
null
Doing track, came in last, got lapped by all six other racers. And I'm skinny and short, too. Fml.
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU by letting myself run a two mile race, dammit.
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r4c72/tifu_by_letting_myself_run_a_two_mile_race_dammit/
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null
[deleted]
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None
null
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null
1332358628
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
r76yp
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_r76yp
null
0
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r76yp/tifu_rode_my_motorcycle_all_the_way_to_work_and/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
3
null
null
Now I'm sitting at my desk still wearing my motorcycle jacket. This is going to be an interesting day.
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU Rode my motorcycle all the way to work and realized when I got there that I hadn't put a shirt on
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r76yp/tifu_rode_my_motorcycle_all_the_way_to_work_and/
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null
null
null
null
null
estrtshffl
null
None
null
null
null
1332310934
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
r6ez2
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_r6ez2
null
11
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r6ez2/tifu_by_setting_a_dryer_on_fire_in_my_dorm/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
47
null
null
Well, I was washing my clothes, like you do. But this particular load of laundry was *massive.* I must have had a week and a half of dirty laundry in there, and I am not a small person. Anyway, I take my clothes out of the washing machine, when I notice they are soaking wet. Not the normal amount of wet that is to be expected when you was clothes, but they're drenched. There was even still a little pool of water at the bottom of the washer. I figure, "fuck it, it's a dryer. It'll be fine." And I load up the dryer, and hit start. This was my first mistake. Turns out, the clothes were so wet and heavy that the drum of the dryer was weighed down and couldn't turn. So it caught on fire. I caused all 9 floors to evacuate. Felt pretty good about myself.
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU by setting a dryer on fire in my dorm, causing an evacuation.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r6ez2/tifu_by_setting_a_dryer_on_fire_in_my_dorm/
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null
null
null
null
null
quarantines
null
None
null
null
null
1332303738
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
r6ahb
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_r6ahb
null
10
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r6ahb/tifu_by_accidentally_titling_a_paper_derp_and/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
121
null
null
I titled the paper "derp" just as a stand-in for an actual title until I could come up with something better. When I went to the printing lab on my campus and had my file printed, I realized that I'd completely overlooked my stand-in title and I didn't have enough money on my student card to print another 20 copies (each copy is 10 pages). My professor didn't say anything about it but the class was pretty amused.
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU by accidentally titling a paper "derp" and printing 20 copies for my class
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r6ahb/tifu_by_accidentally_titling_a_paper_derp_and/
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null
null
null
null
[deleted]
null
None
null
null
null
1332459063
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
r94uv
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_r94uv
null
0
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r94uv/yifu_drank_all_day_and_night_woke_up_without_a/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
1
null
null
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
YIFU, drank all day and night woke up without a toenail. No clue what happened.
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r94uv/yifu_drank_all_day_and_night_woke_up_without_a/
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null
null
null
null
null
danaluz
null
None
null
null
null
1332458318
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
r949d
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_r949d
null
11
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r949d/tifu_squeezed_hand_lotion_on_my_toothbrush_then/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
64
null
null
...they were in the same shaped tube.
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null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: Squeezed hand lotion on my toothbrush then started brushing my teeth
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r949d/tifu_squeezed_hand_lotion_on_my_toothbrush_then/
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null
null
null
null
null
druggedmonkey
null
None
null
null
null
1332454573
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
r9123
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_r9123
null
6
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r9123/tifu_never_put_diseases_in_mail_titles/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
17
null
null
Today I opend my mails in class to open a powerpoint presentation, but I forgot it was called herpes because it seemed funny at home, but not on the projector in the classroom, my whole class and 3 teachers saw it. I had to explain it to the principal, they called my parents to tell it to them.
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null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: never put diseases in mail titles
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r9123/tifu_never_put_diseases_in_mail_titles/
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null
null
null
null
null
[deleted]
null
None
null
null
null
1332431814
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
r8hyv
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_r8hyv
null
8
null
True
null
/r/tifu/comments/r8hyv/tifu_broke_my_phone_charger/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
17
null
null
I accidentally ran my vaccum cleaner over my phone's charger cable and it [completely ate it up and tore it to bits](http://i.imgur.com/ZOhor.jpg). There's a tiny electrical burn on the carpet. Glad it didn't short the power or anything.
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null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: broke my phone charger
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r8hyv/tifu_broke_my_phone_charger/
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null
null
null
null
null
illegal_people
null
None
null
null
null
1332420302
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
r8a7d
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_r8a7d
null
8
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r8a7d/tifu_by_mistakenly_burning_my_dick_with_a_joint/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
0
null
null
so i was smoking this joint right while playing modern warfare 3 (the game sucks i know) and i was naked and shit, cause that's how a real nigga does it. so i was smoking, like any pothead would on a daily basis, and i had my dick hanging low, cause it's all big and shit, and my ash tray just happened to have been placed next to it, cause i'm a dumb fuck like that. problem? anyway, anyway, i went to put the joint out and put it out on my dick now it's all blistered and shit, was bleeding a little, not a pleasant feeling at all what so ever. i wouldn't make it far in the BME. bet you guys didn't see that coming.
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null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU by mistakenly burning my dick with a joint ash
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r8a7d/tifu_by_mistakenly_burning_my_dick_with_a_joint/
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null
null
null
null
null
Kushie1
null
None
null
null
null
1332405703
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
r84xb
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_r84xb
null
9
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r84xb/tifu_tried_giving_myself_a_haircut/
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null
null
null
null
null
null
10
null
null
Bald spot on the back of my head. The rest of the haircut looks pretty nice. I have to get it fixed in the morning :(
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null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: Tried giving myself a haircut.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r84xb/tifu_tried_giving_myself_a_haircut/
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null
null
null
null
null
maldegro
null
None
null
null
null
1332534807
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rahgm
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rahgm
null
8
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rahgm/tifu_i_got_locked_in_the_bathroom_stall_at_my/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
26
null
null
At no point did it occur to me to crawl underneath the stall.
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null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: I got locked in the bathroom stall at my boyfriend's frat until one of his brothers broke down the door.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rahgm/tifu_i_got_locked_in_the_bathroom_stall_at_my/
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null
null
null
null
null
purplejasmine
null
None
null
null
null
1332534179
null
None
self.tifu
True
null
False
null
ragwo
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_ragwo
null
14
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/ragwo/tifu_by_apparently_going_too_far_for_4chan/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
0
null
null
Long story short, my friend said he'd try to find some Amanda Knox images for me (I'm a little obsessed). Whether joking or not, I wasn't sure, but it turned out he went onto 4chan and asked for Rule 34 on Amanda Knox. To which several people replied that he was going too far/that was too hardcore. He then printscreened the whole thing and posted it on my Facebook wall as proof. For those who don't know what I mean when I say rule 34, I refer you to the [rules of the internet](http://rulesoftheinternet.com/index.php?title=Main_Page) : 34 There is porn of it, no exceptions. 35. If no porn is found of it, it will be made. RE: Proof. After trawling back through my removed facebook posts, I found the screenshot. Turns out the comment was 'The day /b went too far." For proof, refer to [this link](http://www.flickr.com/photos/75541553@N03/6864573520/in/photostream)
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null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU by apparently going too far... for 4chan.
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null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/ragwo/tifu_by_apparently_going_too_far_for_4chan/
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null
null
null
null
null
[deleted]
null
None
null
null
null
1332515491
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
ra1fi
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_ra1fi
null
0
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/ra1fi/tifu_by_spilling_egg_yolk_directly_on_my_crotch/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
0
null
null
Probably the most pornographic thing that's ever happened in my dining room. And the closest thing I've had to a cumshot in 7 months. I almost kind of liked it...I really need to get laid.
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null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU by spilling egg yolk directly on my crotch and inner thighs and trying to salvage it.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/ra1fi/tifu_by_spilling_egg_yolk_directly_on_my_crotch/
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null
null
null
null
null
br0kenr3crd
null
None
null
null
null
1332515113
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
ra14i
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_ra14i
null
6
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/ra14i/tifu_threw_my_keys_away_and_held_onto_the_coffee/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
12
null
null
I was on my way out of my usual coffee stop heading to my truck for work and threw away my keys in the sidewalk garbage can and held onto the cup.
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null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: Threw my keys away and held onto the coffee cup
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/ra14i/tifu_threw_my_keys_away_and_held_onto_the_coffee/
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null
null
null
null
null
Thundathury
null
None
null
null
null
1332508923
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
r9x2k
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_r9x2k
null
34
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r9x2k/tifu_cat_wanted_me_to_hug_her_while_i_was_peeing/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
82
null
null
I was peeing. Then my cat came into the toilet, jumped on the bathtub and wanted me to hug her. So basically, my cat fell into the toilet which was full of my pee
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null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: cat wanted me to hug her while i was peeing and fell into the toilet
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r9x2k/tifu_cat_wanted_me_to_hug_her_while_i_was_peeing/
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null
null
null
null
[deleted]
null
None
null
null
null
1332488831
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
r9pkn
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_r9pkn
null
0
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/r9pkn/tifu_by_telling_my_best_friend_i_knew_his/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
1
null
null
My friend starting dating this younger girl recently, and she gets along with everyone and is very friendly. I told him that I knew this one would last (since his last one didn't). Today they broke up for un-known reasons.... I feel terrible
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU by telling my best friend I knew his relationship would late, days before she breaks up with him
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/r9pkn/tifu_by_telling_my_best_friend_i_knew_his/
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null
null
null
null
[deleted]
null
None
null
null
null
1332631798
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rc009
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rc009
null
30
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rc009/tifu_i_went_to_fart_in_the_shower_and_explosive/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
171
null
null
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: I went to fart in the shower, and explosive diarrhea came out.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rc009/tifu_i_went_to_fart_in_the_shower_and_explosive/
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null
null
null
null
null
[deleted]
null
None
null
null
null
1332603011
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rbgek
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rbgek
null
0
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rbgek/tifu_i_was_browsing_the_internet_for_a_solid_hour/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
0
null
null
All that time wasted!
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null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: I was browsing the internet for a solid hour before I turned on some music.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rbgek/tifu_i_was_browsing_the_internet_for_a_solid_hour/
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null
null
null
null
null
[deleted]
null
None
null
null
null
1332569218
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rb4n5
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rb4n5
null
0
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rb4n5/what_kind_of_trouble_can_i_get_in_for_doing_this/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
0
null
null
*Dude is trying to sell his car so I used his phone number and created another almost identical ad but with half the price so he gets bombarded with calls and texts. Posted on Backpages and Craigslist. *Then I ordered a pizza from Dominos online and have it scheduled for delivery tomorrow morning. *So whats the worst that could happen to me?
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
What kind of trouble can I get in for doing this? (Posted fake craigslist ad and sent a pizza order online)
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rb4n5/what_kind_of_trouble_can_i_get_in_for_doing_this/
null
null
null
null
null
null
Benjy741741
null
None
null
null
null
1332562662
null
None
self.tifu
True
null
False
null
rb12g
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rb12g
null
70
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rb12g/tifu_killed_a_dog/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
107
null
null
I was out on a casual bike ride this afternoon. Around 8 miles from my home, I approached a house with a notorious Rottweiler that likes to chase (and hurt) people. Well, the fucking thing takes off after me. I thought I could just burn it out of sheer speed, but he's on me like stink on shit. I figure I'm doing around 40 at this point, and the dog is matching my speed. I'm scared for my life, so I was going batshit crazy and pedaling like I never have. I see a car up ahead. I don't give it a second thought, but as it passes me I hear a *screech* and then **thump**. The dog was apparently running after me and when the car came, it switched over to the other side of the road, right in front of the car. It died. I feel awful...even though it was a horrible, vicious dog that has mauled people before (don't ask me how it wasn't taken) , I feel responsible for his death. tl;dr-Dog chased me, car passed me, car hit dog. I feel bad.
null
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null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: Killed a dog
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rb12g/tifu_killed_a_dog/
null
null
null
null
null
null
funk100
null
None
null
null
null
1332710932
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rd6lp
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rd6lp
null
21
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rd6lp/tifu_i_spent_my_weekend_on_reddit/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
40
null
null
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: I spent my weekend on reddit
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rd6lp/tifu_i_spent_my_weekend_on_reddit/
null
null
null
null
null
null
sleepinlight
null
None
null
null
null
1332645545
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rc94g
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rc94g
null
31
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rc94g/tifu_by_forgetting_to_lock_my_phone_which/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
51
null
null
Which happened to be a picture of my girlfriend giving me head. I am mortified.
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null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU by forgetting to lock my phone, which resulted in it accidentally sending the most recent picture I had taken to my 13 year old sister.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rc94g/tifu_by_forgetting_to_lock_my_phone_which/
null
null
null
null
null
null
wellidonotknow
null
None
null
null
null
1332639603
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rc58w
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rc58w
null
3
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rc58w/tifu_put_clothes_in_the_washing_machine_turned/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
22
null
null
Went to the basement to switch things out but it took me a minute to figure out why the dryer was on and why the clothes I took out of the washer weren't wet
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: Put clothes in the washing machine, turned the dryer on instead
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rc58w/tifu_put_clothes_in_the_washing_machine_turned/
null
null
null
null
null
null
[deleted]
null
None
null
null
null
1332636541
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rc36o
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rc36o
null
5
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rc36o/tifu_threw_an_open_water_bottle_onto_my_bed/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
27
null
null
I had been distracted by my phone while replacing the lid, so i absent-mindedly just did what I had been planning to do with the bottle before I was distracted. Now I have a soaking wet bed :(
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: Threw an open water bottle onto my bed
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rc36o/tifu_threw_an_open_water_bottle_onto_my_bed/
null
null
null
null
null
null
ValuableRubbish
null
None
null
null
null
1332804761
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rezgr
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rezgr
null
7
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rezgr/tifu_today_i_was_going_to_study_for_tomorrows/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
96
null
null
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: Today i was going to study for tomorrow's physics test, and i decided i should "check" reddit before i started.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rezgr/tifu_today_i_was_going_to_study_for_tomorrows/
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null
null
null
null
null
[deleted]
null
None
null
null
null
1332804027
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
reyvf
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_reyvf
null
0
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/reyvf/today_i_was_going_to_study_for_tomorrows_physics/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
1
null
null
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
Today i was going to study for tomorrow's physics test, and i decided i should "check" reddit before i started.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/reyvf/today_i_was_going_to_study_for_tomorrows_physics/
null
null
null
null
null
null
[deleted]
null
None
null
null
null
1332803141
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rey4c
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rey4c
null
10
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rey4c/tifu_gave_my_lady_friend_a_black_eye/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
42
null
null
As I arrived at her house, I walked in to be greeted by my lovely lady friend and her cat, who darted through my legs while I was walking in. I tripped over the cat, falling forward onto my girlfriend who had just turned around to walk to her room, she fell and hit her face on a bat that her brother left on the floor. -__- She said it's fine, but I'm freaking the hell out because her dad... Scary scary man...
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null
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: Gave my lady friend a black eye
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rey4c/tifu_gave_my_lady_friend_a_black_eye/
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null
null
null
null
null
--AutonomousKnight--
null
None
null
null
null
1332793226
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
repai
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_repai
null
0
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/repai/tifu_love/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
1
null
null
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: Love...
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/repai/tifu_love/
null
null
null
null
null
null
merpmerp
null
None
null
null
null
1332790652
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
remyv
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_remyv
null
8
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/remyv/tifu_thought_my_class_started_at_250_turns_out_it/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
56
null
null
Rushed to campus and as soon as I got a parking spot I realized my mistake. I missed an important review I really needed. No idea why I woke up and thought this today. It's the middle of the semester, I should know this shit, dammit!
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: Thought my class started at 2:50, turns out it ended at 2:50
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/remyv/tifu_thought_my_class_started_at_250_turns_out_it/
null
null
null
null
null
null
JACKMHARRIS
null
None
null
null
null
1332778832
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
red2e
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_red2e
null
20
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/red2e/tifu_snipped_my_ball_bag_while_trimming_my_pubes/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
26
null
null
I know this has happened to most blokes and it hurt like hell!!
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null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: snipped my ball bag while trimming my pubes!
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/red2e/tifu_snipped_my_ball_bag_while_trimming_my_pubes/
null
null
null
null
null
null
im_tw1g
null
None
null
null
null
1332757419
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
re0m2
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_re0m2
null
1
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/re0m2/tifu_i_asked_when_the_narwale_bacons_5_hours/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
0
null
null
and, yes, I am new here. I guess I've found a new way to sell my life to strangers! :D EDIT: *narwhal and by the way, first day on reddit. What should a narwhal look like when it bacons, cause i haven't seen one yet.
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null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: I asked when the narwale bacons... 5 hours before I joined reddit.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/re0m2/tifu_i_asked_when_the_narwale_bacons_5_hours/
null
null
null
null
null
null
kirill14n
null
None
null
null
null
1332728617
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rdkos
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rdkos
null
7
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rdkos/today_i_told_my_gf_that_nobody_loves_her/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
0
null
null
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
today I told my gf that nobody loves her
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rdkos/today_i_told_my_gf_that_nobody_loves_her/
null
null
null
null
null
null
[deleted]
null
None
null
null
null
1332728019
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rdk7e
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rdk7e
null
22
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rdk7e/tifu_i_used_my_moms_pumice_stone_to_scratch_my/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
34
null
null
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: I used my mom's pumice stone to scratch my balls in the shower.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rdk7e/tifu_i_used_my_moms_pumice_stone_to_scratch_my/
null
null
null
null
null
null
LeapingLemon
null
None
null
null
null
1332726612
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rdj2t
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rdj2t
null
1
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rdj2t/i_sprayed_an_upside_down_bottle_of_air_duster_on/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
0
null
null
I'm a dumbass, i know :/
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
I sprayed an upside down bottle of air duster on my wrist, how long will it stay a deep red?
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rdj2t/i_sprayed_an_upside_down_bottle_of_air_duster_on/
null
null
null
null
null
null
pkhong
null
None
null
null
null
1332723587
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rdgmc
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rdgmc
null
21
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rdgmc/tifu_i_took_the_tip_of_a_lit_cigarette_and_put_it/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
13
null
null
Don't know what I was doing, but it was pretty stupid. Lit my hand for about 3 seconds and did it twice. I now have a dark spot on my hand and regret that I've done it. I might end up with a scar now. I made a blister and it broke so I just ripped it off. It's about the pint size of a cigarette.
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: I took the tip of a lit cigarette and put it on my hand, I might end up with a scar now.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rdgmc/tifu_i_took_the_tip_of_a_lit_cigarette_and_put_it/
null
null
null
null
null
null
bibbleskit
null
None
null
null
null
1332723143
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rdg8y
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rdg8y
null
22
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rdg8y/tifu_rained_hard_and_the_sides_of_the_streets_are/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
342
null
null
I drove my car into the giant puddles to make huge splashes. So I did. Didn't see the old lady. The force of the wave not only soaked her, but also made her disappear into a bush. She's ok though.
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: rained hard and the sides of the streets are flooded, thought it would be fun if...
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rdg8y/tifu_rained_hard_and_the_sides_of_the_streets_are/
null
null
null
null
null
null
[deleted]
null
None
null
null
null
1332886179
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rgisa
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rgisa
null
0
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rgisa/tifu_glitched_my_way_to_a_mew_in_pokemon_blue_but/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
0
null
null
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: Glitched my way to a Mew in Pokemon Blue but didn't have any Pokeballs once I got him.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rgisa/tifu_glitched_my_way_to_a_mew_in_pokemon_blue_but/
null
null
null
null
null
null
[deleted]
null
None
null
null
null
1332878597
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rgc6y
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rgc6y
null
9
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rgc6y/tifu_i_asked_a_girl_hey_hows_it_going_on_her_wall/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
0
null
null
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU I asked a girl "Hey, how's it going?" on her wall and according to my friends this is wrong.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rgc6y/tifu_i_asked_a_girl_hey_hows_it_going_on_her_wall/
null
null
null
null
null
null
kayraree
null
None
null
null
null
1332866434
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rg1jp
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rg1jp
null
2
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rg1jp/tifu_i_called_into_work_to_go_see_a_boy_who/
null
null
null
null
null
null
null
4
null
null
Technically it was yesterday, but I didn't find this subreddit until today. I do stupid things when I care about people.
null
null
null
t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: I called into work to go see a boy who subsequently bailed.
null
null
null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rg1jp/tifu_i_called_into_work_to_go_see_a_boy_who/
null
null
null
null
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[deleted]
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None
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1332865396
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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rg0ps
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null
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True
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None
{}
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t3_rg0ps
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0
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False
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/r/tifu/comments/rg0ps/tifu_didnt_have_renters_insurance_got_burglarized/
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0
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null
Well this didn't happen today, it happened a week ago, but gosh, tarnations, it still stings like hell. If only someone had told me about renters insurance when I moved into this place, my first apartment. I guess people assume you know because it's so obvious, right? They broke in the backdoor of my garden apartment. Another bonehead mistake was not locking the bigger, stronger lock in addition to the smaller, weaker lock. I wonder if they had been watching me, learning my schedule, looking in the windows at my meager valuables. They took my laptop, 2 digital cameras, Wii, Wii Fit balance board, laptop speakers, random jewelry, my back pack, and the tiny amount of weed I possessed. I lost my Mastodon CD, it was in the laptop. On top of the violation of having some gross vagrant in my apartment while I am away, working hard (and redditing) to buy myself nice things and support myself independently, I have to replace my shit out of pocket. After a week, the sadness over losing sentimental items and photos on my laptop and camera I didn't back up is dissipating, but the pain of losing my tax return replacing stolen goods is shameful, regrettable, and embarrassing. Lame first post.
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t5_2to41
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TIFU Didn't have renter's insurance, got burglarized
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rg0ps/tifu_didnt_have_renters_insurance_got_burglarized/
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naturallyblonde86
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None
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1332840581
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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rfndd
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True
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None
{}
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t3_rfndd
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12
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False
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/r/tifu/comments/rfndd/tifu_by_brushing_my_teeth_with_my_grandpas/
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39
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The shit looked like toothpaste.
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t5_2to41
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TIFU by brushing my teeth with my grandpa's ointment.
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http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rfndd/tifu_by_brushing_my_teeth_with_my_grandpas/
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[deleted]
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None
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1332823193
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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rff56
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True
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None
{}
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t3_rff56
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4
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False
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/r/tifu/comments/rff56/tifu_went_to_school_without_my_scubs/
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0
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And some big important state legislators were on campus rating the school on professionalism. I was sent home the second my teacher saw me in street clothes.
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t5_2to41
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TIFU went to school without my scubs
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http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rff56/tifu_went_to_school_without_my_scubs/
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LtDan92
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None
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1332808690
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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rf2tk
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True
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None
{}
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t3_rf2tk
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5
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False
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/r/tifu/comments/rf2tk/tifu_thought_a_test_started_at_8_instead_of_630/
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10
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I ran into to the test room with just enough time to find out that I fucked up real bad and wouldn't be able to retake the test. I had just enough time to bubble in all of the answers. Thank Odin for multiple choice.
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t5_2to41
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TIFU: Thought a test started at 8 instead of 6:30.
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http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rf2tk/tifu_thought_a_test_started_at_8_instead_of_630/
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Classy_Dolphin
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None
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1332972343
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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ri8b4
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True
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None
{}
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t3_ri8b4
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43
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False
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/r/tifu/comments/ri8b4/tifu_had_a_religious_debate_with_seriously/
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12
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Yeah, ok, so I'm the type; regularly browse R/Atheism, love Hitch, and I'm the kind of brainy nerd who loves to get angry about politics and religion. This girl (kinda half girlfriend, its complicated, read: not relevant) is really religious and I've always tried to avoid the topic. However, late last night in a string of compliments she briefly brought it up and I wasn't thinking. Really tired and really stupid, I tried to talk calmly about how religion is crap (SEE WHAT YOU'VE DONE TO ME R/ATHEISM) but I'm not too subtle. I fucked it up REAL bad, she says she's not mad but she's not talking to me nearly as often. How the hell can I possibly try to make that right, anyway? What can you do? It was really late and I was saying stuff I never would have said if I had my wits about me..... as a religious person its hard for her to take me seriously now; god isn't really something she can ignore about me anymore, I guess...... anyway, yeah.
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t5_2to41
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TIFU: Had a religious debate with seriously Christian girl (love interest ofc)
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http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/ri8b4/tifu_had_a_religious_debate_with_seriously/
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itdeffwasnotme
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None
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1332968647
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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ri4yu
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True
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None
{}
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t3_ri4yu
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2
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False
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/r/tifu/comments/ri4yu/tifu_i_lost_my_130_headphones/
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0
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I have no idea how either. Beyond pissed is not enough to describe my feelings. I took them off before walking into a sandwich shop and shoved them into my pocket, got my sandwich to go, then walked up to a park bench to start to study. An hour later I was about to leave and noticed they were gone. I thought they were with me the whole time. I retraced my steps THREE times and no avast. I've searched myself more than the TSA would. Gone. They were Bose MIE2 for those who care.
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t5_2to41
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TIFU: I lost my $130 headphones
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http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/ri4yu/tifu_i_lost_my_130_headphones/
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[deleted]
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None
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1332939071
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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rhgm7
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True
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None
{}
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t3_rhgm7
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1
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False
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/r/tifu/comments/rhgm7/tifu_i_navigated_through_a_very_expensive_5/
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12
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null
As a reward I get to hear the whole thing again. Hooray!
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t5_2to41
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TIFU: I navigated through a very expensive, 5 minute automated phone call only to miss the "3" on my phone and accidentally hang up.
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rhgm7/tifu_i_navigated_through_a_very_expensive_5/
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TrollingBaron
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None
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1332933024
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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rhe3m
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True
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None
{}
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t3_rhe3m
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11
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False
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/r/tifu/comments/rhe3m/tifu_i_attacked_the_groundwith_my_facefrom_the/
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52
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This wasn't today, but a few days back. I was at this lookout tower with my class, when I needed to pee real bad. I went and peed, then went to go down a flight of stairs to look out of the tower from there. I completely missed the first step in an epic fail, by kicking the guard rail, and flew down about 10 stairs, falling on my face. I have no pics of my face now, as it was a few days ago, and I didn't want to take pictures. But I assure you, my face was pretty badly swollen.
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t5_2to41
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null
TIFU: I attacked the ground...with my face...from the top of the stairs
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rhe3m/tifu_i_attacked_the_groundwith_my_facefrom_the/
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theeowl
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None
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1332921856
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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rh9zg
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True
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None
{}
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t3_rh9zg
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19
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False
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/r/tifu/comments/rh9zg/tifu_have_you_ever_had_a_girl_text_you_while_you/
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16
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null
When my friends girlfriend texted me mid-stroke I fucked up. I should have just finished and answered her question but noooo...... instead Captain Stupid has to sail blindly into getting all sexual with her. She is apparently WAY uptight about that kind of shit than I thought (which would have been obvious if mini-me hadnt been doing the thinking), and now my friend is mad at nme. Now he's mad and I feel like an ass
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t5_2to41
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null
TIFU: Have you ever had a girl text you while you were whacking off?
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rh9zg/tifu_have_you_ever_had_a_girl_text_you_while_you/
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clearedasfiled
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None
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1332909176
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None
self.tifu
False
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False
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rh2vc
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True
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None
{}
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t3_rh2vc
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24
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False
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/r/tifu/comments/rh2vc/tifu_i_sent_my_best_friend_whos_black_a_text_that/
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201
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t5_2to41
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null
TIFU: I sent my best friend (who's black) a text that said "Lynch tomorrow?"
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rh2vc/tifu_i_sent_my_best_friend_whos_black_a_text_that/
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HeroDrift
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None
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null
1332908357
null
None
self.tifu
False
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False
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rh27c
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null
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null
null
True
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null
None
{}
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t3_rh27c
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4
null
False
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/r/tifu/comments/rh27c/tifu_caught_a_20_oz_coke_with_my_balls/
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30
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null
At the sandwich shop, grabbed a coke from the rack, dropped it, caught it between my hands and my manuggets. It seems the vasectomy from 2 months ago has heightened my junkular pain responsiveness. fyi.
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t5_2to41
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null
TIFU: Caught a 20 oz. coke with my balls
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null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rh27c/tifu_caught_a_20_oz_coke_with_my_balls/
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null
Lothrazar
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None
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null
null
1332901052
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
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rgvw4
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null
null
null
null
True
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null
None
{}
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t3_rgvw4
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27
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False
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/r/tifu/comments/rgvw4/tifu_made_wife_feel_fat_and_unsexy/
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46
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She is only a few pounds overweight, way less than 200, and has been trying hard. Today she was saying how it doesn't seem like a priority and she asked "do you ever find me unattractive because of my weight" and I instantly reacted by saying "Sometimes, but not most of the time". Yeah.
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t5_2to41
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null
TIFU: made wife feel fat and unsexy.
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null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rgvw4/tifu_made_wife_feel_fat_and_unsexy/
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null
Tenswank
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None
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null
null
1332899231
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
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rgu79
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null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
null
t3_rgu79
null
10
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rgu79/tifu_fapping_in_class_to_substitute_made_eye/
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null
null
null
null
null
0
null
null
She was the perfect teacher, and for French class, no less. She was the type of lean, delicious looking french woman, the type one would imagine all French females looked like. Now, I can't say much about her teaching skills, because frankly, I cared extremely little about that factor. So there I was, in the middle of the hour-and-a-half period, and my warm phallus couldn't get over it. I was yelling at Boner to stop it, that I couldn't do anything about it, that it won't be seeing any wet, fleshy holes in the near future just because it sees something nice. But did he listen? NOOooOOo. He just kept on pressing against my jeans like he was a newborn snake in a shell, desperately trying to be free by forcing its head against the shell as hard as possible. Well, luckily my jeans had enough structural integrity to keep the beast held, but I knew that Boner wouldn't be settling down unless I did something about it. Yes, it was going to be a long, painful class. Or... Was it. I was wearing a sweatshirt today, and for the sake of my genital health, I believed I had to solve this problem. She begins giving a lesson on Conditional tenses, when my hand wanders down to my thigh. I was in one of those tables where if you recline/slouch in your chair enough, nobody in class could see past your waist. I watched her wiggle her backside as she wrote on the whiteboard, and that's when I got down to business. She talked to the class in an airy voice as I had one of those over-pants fap. You know what I'm talking about. I won't go into detail. Anyway, I knew something big was going to happen. Very, very soon. I'm reaching climax, when it happens. She looks directly - fucking - at me while she utters the words, "Which would make 'aller' turn into 'irais'" As she looks into my eyes, I'm soiling my pants to the maximum level one can stain their pants with semen, and I can barely supress the contortions of pleasure on my face. Obviously, I failed, because I could see in her eyes she knew EXACTLY what I was doing. She trailed off. The class came to a silence. Soon enough, she picked back up on the lesson, and we both continued, pretending like nothing happened. She never called on me. As we left the room when class was over, everybody saying "Au revoir", I refuse to make eye contact with her mumbling the words as a wave of shame washes over me as I feel her eyes burning into the back of my head. As soon as I leave, the door slams shut. I dare not look through the window in the door to throw even a look of apology, or regret. No, I can't bear it. I saw the horror that quickly turned to disgust earlier, the last thing I need right now is to see a 10/10 frenchwoman looking at me with hatred. I don't think I'll see her again, reddit. Today, I fucked up.
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t5_2to41
null
null
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null
TIFU: Fapping in class to substitute, made eye contact during finish
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null
null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rgu79/tifu_fapping_in_class_to_substitute_made_eye/
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JankstarrK
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None
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null
1332893028
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
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rgosl
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
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null
None
{}
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t3_rgosl
null
0
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rgosl/tifu_skipped_class_because_i_lost_my_worksheet/
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null
null
0
null
null
Could have just gone and told the teacher I lost it instead now I have to email her and make up some bullshit.
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t5_2to41
null
null
null
null
TIFU: Skipped class because I lost my worksheet that was due
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rgosl/tifu_skipped_class_because_i_lost_my_worksheet/
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null
[deleted]
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None
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null
null
1333055928
null
None
self.tifu
False
null
False
null
rjv53
null
null
null
null
null
null
True
null
null
None
{}
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t3_rjv53
null
0
null
False
null
/r/tifu/comments/rjv53/tifu_unknowingly_i_just_cursed_out_my_landlords/
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null
null
null
null
null
1
null
null
Note: I originally posted this in AskReddit, which I guess was wrong? It got down-voted immediately. Anyway, onto the story... I'm working at my computer in my first-floor apartment when this woman steps out of a silver SUV and walks over to my window and tells me to let her in. First of all, I'm not even sure that she's talking to me, she's halfway crossing the street, so I initially ignore her. This seems to instantly piss her off, so she raises her voice. Now I understand that she is, in fact, talking to me, and not very nicely. I intentionally ignore this aggressive stranger, and the situation escalates. She looks at me like I'm an idiot. It's very deliberate. Now I'm pissed. Once it becomes clear that I'm not going to let her -- a complete stranger -- come in, she proceeds to walk over to the front door and bang on it. I step out of my room, open the door to the hallway, and slowly walk in her direction. I'm dressed in gym shorts, flip-flops, and this huge, nordic-looking sweater. The inner front door is propped open, so only the exterior door is closed and locked. I step into the little foyer, and I actually give her a moment to explain, but instead, she continues to demand I let her in. I ask her if it's an emergency. I ask her this honestly. She either doesn't hear me because she's too busy talking or ignores the question. She says she needs to see Ron, the landlord, but won't explain why. For all I know, she's there to stab Ron in the heart. Based on her erratic behavior, it didn't seem so far fetched. But that's retrospect. In the moment, I just heard a stranger yelling at me to do what they wanted, without the courtesy of letting me finish a single sentence. So I did something I haven't done for a long time: I lost my temper. Through the glass of the front door, I shouted at her that she had no respect. I told her that I live here and that I am working. I told her that she is completely out of line demanding anything from me when I have no idea who she is. To punctuate this last sentence, I bang the heel of my fist against the window and go back into my room. Presumably because he heard my shouting, Ron comes up out of the basement and finds his wife standing outside looking flustered. They are both standing in front of my window now, and she's angrily waving her finger in my direction and telling her husband something. I see Ron walk back to the building, and I walk out to meet him. His wife comes over and starts to yell her account of things once again. I start to explain my perspective on what happened. Ron looks calm, but his eyes are hard. As I talk, I imagine what it must have been like to be a criminal, caught by Ron in his days as an officer of the NYPD. I explain that this woman came up to my window and demanded to be let in. Ron responds, "but this is my wife." Ron's wife takes my sudden pause as an invitation to contradict everything that I just said, which concerns me initially -- she's his wife, after all. She closes her account of things by saying that I nearly broke the glass of the front door when I hit it, and that I should "act like a human being." Confident in her triumph, the woman retreats back outside, presumably to leave Ron to the task of reprimanding his misbehaving tenant. I am visibly shaken by this incident. When I lose my temper, I have a tendency to shake afterwards -- my hands are still tremulous as I type this. However, I have never given Ron reason to believe that I am a bad person. I'm a good tenant. I apologize several times. It's a genuine apology because even though this woman mistreated me, if I had known she was Ron's wife, I would have tolerated it without saying a word. I would suffer the insult because I respect Ron as a landlord and as a person. Ron is gracious and understanding. He tells me not to worry about it and even smiles a little. Nonetheless, I'm still worried that I've crossed a line.
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t5_2to41
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null
TIFU: Unknowingly, I just cursed out my landlord's wife. I live in New York where housing is insane. Am I totally screwed?
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null
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/rjv53/tifu_unknowingly_i_just_cursed_out_my_landlords/
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