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tone alone cannot sustain a film , but it can go a long way . if i can find myself lost in the time and place of a story , it scores immediate style points . when that tone is backed up by an outstanding story and great acting , the effect can be described best by an adjective i do not use lightly : " literary . " what's eating gilbert grape ? is such a film . it's a rich , memorable and stunningly acted story of desire colliding with responsibility , staged in a manner which many viewers might find too prosaic , but which insinuated itself into my imagination with its confidence . gilbert grape ( johnny depp ) is a young man living in rural endora , iowa , facing incredible responsibilities . as the man of the house since his father's suicide , gilbert must support the family by working at the local grocery store . he also must watch over his mentally handicapped brother arnie ( leonardo dicaprio ) and help care for his extremely overweight mother ( darlene cates ) . gilbert seems destined to spend the rest of his life in the small town until the arrival in endora of becky ( juliette lewis ) , a free spirit passing through with her grandmother when their truck breaks down . as he spends time with becky , gilbert begins to think about all the things he is missing . slowly his resentment builds , until he realizes that he can no longer live his entire life for other people . director lasse hallstrom ( my life as a dog ) and legendary cinematographer sven nykvist create a magnificent visual backdrop for peter hedges' screenplay , based on his own novel . endora is a town on the edge of the world represented by the giant foodmart , a tiny insular community where everyone knows everyone else . the midwestern sunsets and sprawling fields are beautifully photographed , and the atmosphere of the town is intensely real . minor characters , like crispin glover as the town's mortician , are vividly realized , and there are echoes of the last picture show in mary steenburgen's desperately unhappy housewife . one of the most perfectly realized scenes focuses on the grand opening of a burger franchise , attended by the entire town and accompanied by the off-key high school band . not a single note in the depiction of endora rang false . the same can be said of the character of gilbert . it's testimony to the precision involved in his creation that he came together completely with one perfectly placed line , when becky responds to gilbert's description of his father with , " i knew someone like that once . " gilbert is a man harboring an ever-growing bitterness about where he finds himself in life , a bitterness which reveals itself in moments of surprising cruelty . in one scene , he allows local children to look at his mother through their window , displaying her like a side show attraction . his entire life seems to be mocked by arnie's repeated chants of , " we're not going anywhere , " but instead of expressing his dissatisfaction he lets his anger simmer , and it becomes clear that he is following in his father's footsteps in this regard . johnny depp expertly demonstrates the tension central to gilbert by playing everything below the surface , but he never gives in to one-dimensional blankness or simply regurgitates his naif roles in benny & joon and edward scissorhands . depp's performance is overshadowed , however , by leonardo dicaprio's astonishing oscar-nominated supporting work as arnie . he puts to shame such big name actors as john malkovich and dustin hoffman , whose mentally challenged characters never seemed completely real . dicaprio is perfect to the last twitch and squeal , and anyone who has ever spent time with mentally challenged kids will be hard-pressed to spot a flaw . darlene cates , a first-time actor , brings real pain to her scenes as gilbert's tortured mother , and laura harrington and mary kate schellhardt are solid as gilbert's sisters . only juliette lewis doesn't quite click , playing a critical role with her now familiar dopey drone and too little genuine spark . gilbert grape does seem to drift into its conclusion , but it never lost me . thanks to a lovingly created setting and a marvelous cast , this 1993 release proves well worth the wait .

some of my friends who went to live in usa complain about one thing - that country is very different from the one depicted in hollywood movies . that is especially true for those who end up somewhere in that unexplored land between los angeles and new york where they find , to their big surprise , that the majority of people vote republican , go to church every sunday and usually don't tolerate liberal attitudes that are taken for granted in an average american film . such rude awakening , however , can happen in another direction - conservative people are sometimes forced to discover unpleasant truths about world they live in . something like that happens to jake van dorn ( george c . scott ) , successful grand rapids businessman who shares strong calvinist convictions with the rest of his community . one day his daughter kristen ( ilah davis ) disappears from calvinist youth convention in california . van dorn is worried because he doesn't believe that his daughter would run from home . however , the truth delivered by private investigator andy mast ( peter boyle ) is even harder - kristen is spotted in cheap pornographic film . infuriated van dorn is unsatisfied with the way mast's investigation is going , so he goes to los angeles to search for kristen himself . unfortunately , he lacks experience and the quest , that brought him to the utter depths of sex underworld , is fruitless . things change when he devises cunning plan and , while doing it , stumbles on sympathetic prostitute and part time porno actress nicky ( season hubley ) . almost two decades after its release , hardcore is mostly forgotten by critics and film scholars . it is a real shame , because very few movies in today's hollywood would dare tackle controversial issues that writer and director paul schrader explored in his second directorial attempt . in late 1970s , it was totally different situation - films were expected to have mature , serious themes for the mature audience . for schrader this film was nice opportunity to expand the subplot of his previous work , taxi driver - one that deals with the great generational divide that tormented the american society in 1970s . on one side we have an old america that sticks to the puritan ideals of hard work and strict morals that made that country great . but that america is obviously unable to cope with the new challenges brought by the social turmoil in 1960s and , instead of facing them , prefers to live in rural , conservative cocoons . the new america , on the other hand , fares no better - ideals of the so-called " sexual revolution " , same as all other " revolutions " of the swinging sixties , degraded into exploitation and depravity . instead of being " liberated " , baby boomers are stuck with their own inability to cope with the newly discovered freedoms . schrader very cleverly brings the idea that those two americas , actually , aren't so far away - nice example is a brilliant scene in which van dorn , already described as an authoritarian and paternalistic capitalist , meets sleazy porno producer ; the latter one also turns out to be authoritarian , paternalistic and very dedicated to this job . the difference between the two is simply in the line of work . many contemporary critics actually accused schrader of promoting conservative agenda . on the surface , it may look that way - audience is forced to sympathise with van dorn and his quest . in the first scenes , he is portrayed as nice family man who actually doesn't deserve to experience parent's worst nightmare . the scene in the porno cinema that reveals kristen's fate is extremely cruel ; pain and humiliation , brought by oscar-winning actor george c . scott , is of such intensity , that the audience feels sorry for him and simply must support his agenda . van dorn is perhaps flawed , and the subtle hints lead to the unflattering truth at the end ; but the viewers simply know that his cause is just , and that prodigal daughter must be better off with her loving father than with the sleazy pornographers that only want to exploit her body . on the other hand , schrader , who grew up in an environment very much like van dorn's ( his own parents wouldn't allow him to watch movies until he was 18 ) , knows better and tries to bring another side of coin . even the people connected with sex underworld can show redeeming qualities - like nicky , who actually tries to improve her life , and sleazy detective who develops something like a conscience at the end . unfortunately , schrader fails to erase the impact of the shocking scene at the beginning , and his attempt to reconcile the opposing sides of america seems lost in somewhat clich ? d finale . the script is slightly flawed , and schrader as director doesn't show too much originality - his style seems too influenced by techniques that scorsese used in taxi driver . apart from the scenes in grand rapids , those two films even look alike . but the content might be more than interesting for today's viewer , especially those inspired by the current 70s revival . until boogie nights , no hollywood mainstream movie ever dared to explore the phenomenon of pornography in 1970s . hardcore , on the other hand , might serve as precious document , because it depicts sex film industry in the period often regarded as the golden age by connoisseurs - before the advent of video , when many of the porno filmmakers could afford to think of themselves as artists . the view of such age and the industry is very unflattering , though , but for the film whose main character takes time to explain calvinist doctrines to the audience , that shouldn't be too surprising . anyway , despite some flaws , hardcore remains very interesting and powerful piece of cinema .

plot : a young man who loves heavy metal music and especially the band steel dragon , to whom he's devoted a tribute band in which he sings , gets launched into stardom when the real group get rid of their lead singer and call on him to take his place . critique : i'm a sucker for movies like this . a young man with a humble background and lofty dreams , works hard , devotes the time , the energy and the patience , and ultimately hits it big-time . in the case of this film , our boy loves a certain heavy metal band and as luck would have it ( yup , luck always finds its way into these types of equations , although generally tied very closely to hard work ) , they need a new singer . his entry and adaptation to the whole " rock 'n roll " lifestyle fills the rest of the film and is really fun to watch . although i will preface this by saying that one thing that would definitely enhance your appreciation for this film is your own love ( or past love ) of heavy metal music and the whole scene around it . metal was one of my first loves as a teen and even though the genre of music isn't that prominent anymore , i still check out my motley crue , twisted sister and anthrax cds every now and again . that's not to say that you won't like this film if you don't like the music , but the music and live performances from the band , play a big part in the movie , and i for one , had a blast watching and listening to it all . but the even greater draw in this film is the standout performance given here by mark wahlberg . wow , hand this fella some major props , as he totally becomes this heavy metal geek/god ( incidentally , metal god was the film's original title , and a much better one if you ask me ) . he is this movie and i was quite taken by his character pretty much the whole way through . he came off like a regular guy with extremely passionate goals and work ethic , who was willing to do anything in order to fulfill his dreams . aniston was also surprisingly good as the girlfriend ( and the romance angle between them was sweet ) , but she didn't pull me in hard enough during their emotional scenes . i was also impressed by some of the " real " musicians who played in the film ( zakk wylde from ozzy osbourne , jeff pilson from dokken , stephan jenkins from third eye blind , blas elias from slaughter ) , but actor dominic west as kirk cuddy made the biggest impression among the band members . it's to note that this film was based on a real-life tale of a young man who used to sing in a judas priest cover band and then went on to become their actual singer ( their original singer also admitted to being gay , as in this film ) . just for the record , i'm certainly not recommending this film for its originality or surprise elements , since most of this stuff has already been covered in some way or another in other movies , but because it's a fun , uplifting , well-paced movie with a solid central showing by wahlberg and energetic live performances . oh yeah , and for those who dig the " heavier " side of music , the soundtrack also rocks ! ! you see . . . dreams can come true . . . where's joblo coming from ? almost famous ( 8/10 ) - blow ( 8/10 ) - boogie nights ( 9/10 ) - detroit rock city ( 8/10 ) - girlfight ( 6/10 ) - goodfellas ( 10/10 )

seen september 5 , 1998 at 10 p . m . at the sony nickelodeon theaters ( boston , ma ) , theater #2 , with matt perreault for free using my sony/loews critic's pass . [theater rating : * * 1/2 : okay seats , sound , and picture] modern society is now inundated with more sex and sexuality than it ever has been before , from teenage sitcoms to nc-17-rated films about fetishes . the biggest debate of the subject is whether or not it affects reality or just reflects it . " your friends and neighbors " takes a different approach as it's a film that revolves almost entirely around sex and how can be used for both pain and pleasure even within a small circle of friends . one of the most important aspects of the film that most be noted and analyzed before the film can really be dissected as a whole is writer/director neil labute's basic setup and some of the unique methods he employs to tell the story . firstly , and most importantly is the fact the script tells a rather complex , detailed story of lust , betrayal , arrogance , hypocrisy , greed , and just plain stupidity between six different characters ( three men , three women ) , without hardly any supporting characters , ( a few have a line or two ) , mostly extras . everything they do will somehow affect another character and ultimately come full-circle back to themselves , whether it be positive or negative . but to just state this is arbitrary , and explaining and criticizing the process is difficult . labute's ability to tell his story through a few characters is a remarkable feat , but what's specifically impressive is the fact the characters' names are never revealed until the end credits roll . for the sake of this review , i will describe the characters and refer to them as their main characteristic . another interesting accomplishment is the fact every scene takes place inside with limited focus . we're always able to tell where the characters are ( someone's home , the gym , a restaurant , hotel room , etc . ) , but what the city they live in , what year it is , what the society is like , etc . is relatively unknown . the film is a complete character study with the tight , intense drama of the theater . no one plot dominates the story , which makes the first act a bit tedious for its lack of background . we're simply dropped in on the characters' lives and are expected to figure out the rest . the characters are a group of middle-class white people who are all successful at what they do , but they're only concern right now seems to be their sex lives . first there's barry ( eckhart ) and mary ( brenneman ) , a married couple who are going through a dry spell not unlike many other couples in other situations who don't know what they're problem is . barry is kind of a dorky businessman who loves his wife , and the sex they have , but doesn't have a lot of ambition - he just follows everyone else . mary is a writer of some sort , but lacks aggression and emotion like her husband and is the meekness character , but ironically , doesn't hesitate to commit adultery just to feel something . labute's script does a good job in characterizing mary and barry as individuals , but is very light on chemistry and connection between the two . obviously , this is the theme , which is enhanced by the actors' good performances , but at the same time seems just a bit hollow . another couple is jerry ( stiller ) and terri ( keener ) who live together and seem to have been involved with each other for a long time , yet they constantly argue over anything and everything . their sex life is also fraught with problems and for some reason they continue to do it throughout their infidelitous relationship . if only one aspect of the film could use improvement , it would be this area . it's natural for a married couple to become bored with each other , but why would two people who can barely stand each other continue to have sex and live together ? what did they ever see in the other person to begin with ? labute never really answers , but since the film is more concerned with the payoff than the process , it still makes for good drama , tension , and manip ulation so intricate and deceitful it's fascinating . two other characters act as catalysts , cary ( jason patric ) and cheri ( natassja kinski ) . cary is an arrogant , hostile sex-maniac who defines the word " bastard . " somehow he is able to bend women to his will , either through charm or just attitude , into getting his way . he's the kind of guy everyone should stay away from as we realize he's secretly perverted , but somehow barry finds comfort in his company , although jerry is always nervous around him . patric gives an outstanding performance , so much so that we want to know more about him despite how intimidating and unlikable he is . cheri is a character labute uses as a catalyst to see how the other characters react to her . she works in an art museum and at some point throughout the film , each character will engage her in almost the exact same conversation and her reaction is always different , from becoming involved in a relationship with one , to brushing it off as small talk with another , to being outright appalled by yet another . she's a sweet woman , perhaps the most normal of any of the characters , and although her symbolism is obvious , her role as the outsider is the most relatable . i will not reveal who cheats on who and how each character is specifically affected by the others' action , as that's the hook of the film . the first two acts begin to set up the characters and each's scenarios , but it's often difficult to tell what they will do about it and with whom . the result is sometimes surprising , other times predictable , but the actual course of actions is always fascinating . for a while everyone has their fun , but ultimately each character's guilt , attitude , or ignorance will disserve them . one of the most important things to note is how realistic the story is supposed to be . since the characters only interact with each other there isn't much pop culture references , as almost everything has a deeper philosophy behind it . are we to assume that these people are , as the title states , our friends and neighbors ? i don't know of anyone going through the same situations as these people . often times the film is not unlike a network melodrama , other times situations are like those not seen outside a porno movie . but what this film does have that the others don't is repercussions in the end . although the film creates its own reality , it goes to show that even the immoral aren't immortal . in what way " your friends and neighbors " is supposed to work is open to interpretation . it definitely has a lot to say about the price that comes with infidelity , but it could have been even better had it expanded on that theme more specifically . still , it's an accomplishment in film-making because it has put a timeless theme into a modern perspective .

synopsis : a maniac , crazed by virulent microphage , slaughters more than twenty people , including a street gang and heavily-armed troops , with a small knife . even with a handgun , however , he can't take out the two cops who are after him , despite having shot one of them a total of seven times . comments : the most notable aspect of adrenalin : fear the rush is that it marks a striking career move for natasha henstridge . not only does she manage to keep all her clothes on ( her trademark in earlier films such as species and maximum risk was to strip naked as often as possible ) , but she actually puts on even more clothes as the film progresses . this will probably disappoint many henstridge fans , but i welcome the change because henstridge is an attractive , capable actress who deserves less exploitative roles ( though , i admit , it doesn't show in this mess ) . henstridge , just like every other actor in the film , delivers a wooden performance in this monumental turkey . ( the cast also includes christopher lambert , who has appeared in the highlander and mortal kombat films . ) how on earth this movie got two big-name stars to appear in it is beyond me . adrenalin : fear the rush is set in boston ten years in the future ( 2007 ) . boston has changed dramatically in those ten years . it is now home to a bunch of interred foreigners and policed by cops who drive around in small cars with " policia " printed on their doors . some guy has a really bad virus , and he's killing people because of it . so , the brave good guys ( lambert and henstridge ) go after him . that's it . 76 minutes never seemed so long . this is a drawn-out chase scene through dimly-lit abandoned buildings turned into an entire movie . the plot development is nil ; we learn absolutely nothing about lambert's character and very little about henstridge's character . the dialogue is littered with unnecessary obscenities and concerns mindnumbingly idiotic arguments over who will go down the next dark corridor/tunnel/airduct next and who will carry the flashlight . a subplot does exist involving henstridge's character's illegal attempt to get her son out of boston . in her opening monologue , a monologue which sounds as though henstridge was reading from cue cards , we learn that she has gone to great lengths to secure a fake passport for her son . twenty minutes into the film , i wondered if the movie would have been better if it focused on this plot . in a defining scene of the movie , however , i changed my mind . this fake passport drops to the ground . lambert's cop immediately recognizes it as a fraud from six feet away . must not have been a good fake . this emphasizes another fault with the film . things just defy common sense . lambert's cop , for instance , is shot seven times , yet he is still able to talk and slide about . adrenalin : fear the rush ends in a trite manner that doesn't seem to even fit the mood that the filmmakers were trying for . i found myself rather bored with this film , which will disappoint both sci-fi/horror fans and fans of henstridge and lambert . don't fear the rush . fear the movie . watch something else .

this is the best british gangster film since the long good friday . jon bennet ( played by andrew howard ) is an extremely good assassin . as such he is probably an evil man but it does not worry him . he has become an unquestioning weapon . he is in the employ of a kingpin ( david calder ) far more evil than he is . but even assassins have innocent pasts . he runs into an old from school days and he is married to a mutual girl friend from school . complicating matters is that they live near where he had a recent job and their young daughter may have seen him at the crime . a big piece of what makes this film work is the depiction of the kingpin . calder is a familiar actor in britain , though not frequently seen in the us . he was seen in the world is not enough . here he creates one of the best screen villains in recent years . he is at once seductive and repellent like a beautiful venomous snake . his lair is underground , apparently in a sewer , where he lives like the king of sewer rats . it is the kingpin who pulls the strings that will control bennet's life . paul sarossy who directs spent most of his career as a cinematographer and like the kingpin's lair , he has molded images of class and style out of the darkness . by using semi-darkness and letting the colors of deep blue and black dominate every scene he makes the film visually as ominous as anything in this nether world . this is a world that is cold and unfriendly . sorossy creates a world of violence much more by what we hear than what we see . this is a film with a great deal of physical violence occurring just out of reach . we see very little but we hear a great deal more and we imagine more than that . the screenplay is by peter waddington based on the novel by neil cross , but it is sarossy's film all the way . it creates indelible images of evil . i rate it an 8 on the 0 to 10 scale and a low +3 on the -4 to +4 scale . ( i do hope they do not use the tagline " don't mess with mr . in-between . " )

i've always been told that there are two things in life that are unavoidable - death and taxes . oddly , i've never given much thought to either of the two . maybe if i did , at least i'd stop getting collection notices from uncle sam . yes , let me make a resolution to devote myself to better record keeping , hold on to all my receipts , and to do what it takes to have the satisfaction that my returns are mistake-free and will keep me from incurring penalties . it seems that the issue of death may not be so different , at least envisioned here in this film . as this tender love story goes , if you do good things and have a clear conscience when you die , you ascend to a place of great peace and beauty . the dreams , wishes , and fantasies that you had when you were alive come true . for those who die with a burdened soul , however , they wind up in that other place . chris and annie ( a winsome robin williams and a radiant annabella sciorra ) seem like the perfect couple that deserve all that heaven has to offer . their love for each other is strong and their bond is undeniable . but tragic events eventually tear apart the fabric of annie's happiness . and when chris dies after a terrible car accident , she commits suicide - a tortured soul who blames herself . despair is perhaps the greatest sin , and she will wallow in her guilt throughout eternity . chris , on the other hand , has made it to heaven , and upon learning of annie's fate , he journeys to hell to find her and to try to free her from her nightmare . this film brims with imagination , containing a lush imagery that shows the arcadia that is heaven and the bitterness and frightfulness that is hell . it seems that heaven and hell could very well be a product of our fantasies or nightmares . it's shape and look is as infinite as our imagination . as chris explores his new fantastic world and discovers things both amazing and wondrous , he also begins to learn more about himself . certain questions baffle him at first . why does his home in heaven ooze with paint ? what is the significance of the asian stewardess ? why does he have an all-too-willing guide ( cuba gooding , jr . ) to help him find annie ? but as he slowly begins to realize the answers , it makes him stronger and gives him a greater chance to save annie . " dreams " is both visually and tellingly beautiful . alas , i have one regret . the movie did well to gather more and more emotional speed , but the denouement was curiously unsatisfying . it seemed as if it was racing to some kind of great finish , but its intensity seemed to wane in its final moments . however , your eyes will still well up with tears and you'll find lots to savor . the storytelling is purposeful and well constructed . the journey is imaginative . and i was surprised by how much i enjoyed this film .

there was probably a good reason that the warner bros . studio chose not to allow critics to view this steven seagal film when it first opened . and , after seeing this piece of toxic waste , i now know why . this movie is by far the worst offering that has hit the screen since possibly those ernest movies years ago . fire down below centers its story on a little mining town in god's country , somewhere in eastern kentucky . it's beauty and natural goodness is being slowly destroyed by an uncaring mining magnate ( kris kristopherson , who constantly looks like he wants to kill his agent for getting him this role ) . it turns out that he's filling the mines throughout kentucky with toxic waste for a tidy profit . seagal plays jack taggert , an aikido-versed , fighting machine , who is an agent with the epa . no . . . not the cia nor the fbi nor the nsa . it's the environmental protection agency . i had no idea that epa agents were trained to be killers ! taggert is sent to find the perpetrators and to bring them to justice . written by someone named jeb , i could already envision the stereotypes of incestuous relationships , banjo-picking preachers , and dumb-as-nails rednecks . but the script puts seagal right smack dab in the middle of all of these scenarios as he tries to discreetly fit in . seagal's idea of a disguise is a long-length $1000 leather jacket . but to get closer to the kinfolk , he will fix people's porches for free . that's another great epa asset - teaching agents how to fix porches . slow and plodding , this project is a total mess . the sometimes allure of watching seagal is watching him outmaneuver enemies that outnumber and outgun him like in under seige . here , his bravado basically turns into bullyness . townsfolk who are foolish enough to challenge seagal are quickly subdued . fight scenes are quick and senseless and offers no enjoyment value whatsoever . and his soap box message wears thin within the first 15 minutes . the most annoying moment comes when he barges into the middle of a sunday church ceremony , gets behind the pulpit , and beseeches the townsfolk to take control of their lives and to help clean up the environment . but the epitome of how moralistically mushy this film gets happens when the person responsible for the toxic dumping , kristopherson , meets up with seagal . kristopherson asks seagal how much it will take for him to go away . seagal gallantly replies : " i'll leave when you take the poison from the streams and the earth . " i was expecting patriotic music to start blasting and a show of fireworks in the background . this is truly nothing more than a pompous showcase for seagal's righteousness and narcissistic arrogance . seagal has been vanguard in trying to bring a new genre into the filmplace , that of the enviro-thriller ( on deadly ground ) . however , the message will never come across through poorly developed vehicles like this . still , i believe in preserving mother earth , so save your $5 and please donate it instead to some worthy environmentally conscious charity .

supposedly based on a true story in which the british drive to build a rail bridge deep in africa grinds to a halt after a pair of lions start killing off the workers in 1898 . john patterson ( val kilmer ) , the bridge building expert set to oversee the operation , tried to rid his operation of the lions , but fails . a world renound hunter , remington ( michael douglas ) , is called in and the battle , man against lion , begins . this film has a great soundtrack , and wonderful scenery . the acting is not too bad except the characters are all so thin . we only see one side of each character . kilmer is a bridge builder and that's all we see him as . these lions kill dozens of his men and he doesn't even appear to be too upset about it . and the plot ? it's jaws , but with lions . again we're presented with an animal that behaves not at all as it should . it appears to kill men because it just likes too . why ? who knows . i guess there wouldn't be much of a story if it didn't . the problem is that there isn't much of a story even though it does .

with a team of 200 graphic artists and animators working on this first film production from game developer squaresoft's square pictures , final fantasy , inspired by the top-selling game franchise , is visually awe-inspiring and groundbreaking . no doubt , you have never seen anything like this film , and the hyperbolic fanfare surrounding its release is absolutely deserved . but why does such a tremendous feat of eye candy have to be weighted down with a problematic story , wooden dialogue and generally uncharismatic voice acting ? obviously , the primary goal of the film is to stun and amaze audiences with extremely sophisticated cgi . everything you see in the film is rendered in great detail : individual threads in the fabric , individual strands of hair swaying , wrinkles and pimples on skin , incredible water effects . overall , the expressions and lip movements fairly accurately match the emotions and dialogue ; and the times when they don't sync perfectly really stand out , since the animation is usually so dazzling . but you won't spend much time dwelling on those gaffes -- as soon as you catch one , the next stellar monster or effect will have you muttering , " wow . . . " like the series of games , final fantasy's plot and characters have little to do with its predecessors , outside of being born from the same japanese mastermind , hironobu sakaguchi . it's the year 2065 , and humans are prisoners in caged cities of their own making that guard them from an outside world now overrun with deadly alien " phantoms . " whenever a human comes in contact with the ghostly visitors , the often-invisible beings pass through the body and wrench out its soul ( for some unexplainable reason ) . while many humans agree with a plan by monomaniacal general hein ( james woods ) to blast the aliens with a " zeus cannon , " dr . aki ross ( ming-na ) and dr . sid ( donald sutherland ) plan to build a " wave " using eight collected " spirits " to counteract the phantoms and kill them off . while the images serve the sci-fi aspect of the film well , the storytelling doesn't . it's unfortunate , because the plot seems so intricately thought out . perhaps it was far too complex and enormous to be entirely incorporated into the script . some could blame this weakness on the fact that it was a japanese concept translated to english , except two americans wrote the screenplay . nevertheless , the end result is an elaborate story complicated by confusing holes . why do these aliens feed on souls ? if they can pass through bodies and ships , how can humans hurt them with guns ? what is so special about the " spirits " that they would create a force strong enough to destroy the aliens ? worse yet , the dialogue is scripted to be either like a science-heavy star trek episode , an installment of die hard , or a sappy love story , depending on who's doing the talking . for the most part , it's bearable considering the genre , but tedious speeches and cheesy lines don't do anything to help the actors and can get annoying in the longer scenes . the only exception is steve buscemi as pilot neil fleming , who always has great cracks during tense moments . but , when the lights come up and the credits roll , you're more likely to be remarking on how fantastic the film looked . there's no question that the roughly 33 million people who have bought at least one final fantasy game will be eager to see this movie , and so should anyone who enjoys being floored by the best cg animation ever put to film . you'd be living in a fantasy world of your own if you expected much more .

i admit it . i thought arnold schwarzenegger had a knack for comedy when he made twins and true lies . watching him in jingle all the way , i wondered why anyone ever thought he could carry such a lame movie targeted at susceptible kids . it was one thing to scare the crap out of kids with the pg-13 kindergarten cop , but parents who let small children see this movie will have to explain themes of violence , alcohol consumption , burglary , racism and child molestation . and you know they'll burst out in tears when arnold punches one of santa's elves . he later decks a reindeer . hey , man , why don't you just kick the easter bunny in the nuts while you're at it ? jingle all the way is formula crap that follows the if someone falls on his ass , it must be funny school of thought . arnold , sinbad and phil hartman crash to the ground more times in this movie than a special olympics hockey team , and the movie dredges up more cliche and less believability with each successive scene . what can you expect from a movie whose entire premise is that two parents can't find a rare toy on christmas eve , and will do anything to get one ? arnold is , of course , one of the parents , a crack salesman who is never there for his son . he races from the office to his son's karate game , only to find out he missed it . and his kid distrusts him because he's never around . ( gee , we haven't seen that in a movie before . ) arnold the absentee father becomes convinced that the only way to buy back his son's affection is to get him a turboman doll , which his wife ( rita wilson , who will never be the breadwinner of the hanks household choosing roles like this ) told him to get weeks ago . so arnold sets out to find a turboman , which turns out to be more rare than the tickle me elmo was when jingle all the way came out . let me back up for a minute here -- arnold's kid is totally obsessed with this turboman character , which is unhealthy beyond belief . watches the show , eats the cereal , sleeps on the freakin' turboman sheets . i'd try to discourage any further obsession myself , lest any kid seeing this movie think it's a wonderful thing to con your dad into racing out to buy you any toy you want . but nooooo , the climax of jingle all the way has arnold dressed up as turboman in a parade , exonerating himself of all wrongdoing in the eyes of wife and son , who don't recognize him until the last minute . this is a sad movie all the way through , but it only gets worse after the opening scenes of arnold and mailman sinbad stampeding through a store , racing off to the mall and hooking up with a santa ( jim belushi ) who runs a bootleg toy factory . most painful to watch is a scene at a radio station , where sinbad holds off the cops with a letter bomb after beating up the deejay ( an embarrassed martin mull ) who said he was giving away a turboman doll . capitalism has produced some pretty evil things ( chia pets ) , but this ode to excess and violent consumerism is one of the most shameful . never mind the subplot with perfect neighbor phil hartman trying to seduce wilson while arnold is off shopping ( " your cookies are incredible " ) , it's the main plot of the movie that sends the message that it's okay to do whatever it takes to get your hands on what you want . maybe that's what christmas is like at the schwarzenegger house , but not at mine .

the rocky horror picture show 'special edition' ( 1975 ) starring : tim curry and susan sarandon cult films are never mainstream . the casual viewer of a cult film will look at it and be repulsed and confused , yelling out 'what the hell is that ? ' . fans of these sorts of movies will be laughing at every other second at all the 'hidden jokes' they missed the first time around while normal movie watchers will look at them like they're insane . the rocky horror picture show , recently re-released in a 'special edition' to video , is the mother of all cult films . period . like some other cult films , most notably little shop of horrors , the rocky horror picture show is a musical with a twisted edge to it . this movie begins out innocently enough- a couple get engaged at a friend's wedding and get a flat tire in the middle of the night while it's raining . they go to a castle to try to use the phone . little do they know that the castle is owned by dr . frank n . furter , a mad transexual transvestite scientist who has recently created a creature he will use for personal reasons . the acting is pretty good overall . tim curry ( home alone 2 , legend ) is over-the-top as frank n . furter . it's interesting to see that this movie was one of future oscar winner susan sarandon's ( dead man walking ) first film- she plays janet , the girlfriend of brad majors . even the singer meatloaf is in it ! ! the songs are all very good yet twisted in their own way . a sampling of titles range from damn it , janet to touch-a touch-a touch-a touch me . all the actors sing their songs with no dubbing from other actors- kind of a bad thing . barry bostwick ( brad majors ) tries to sing as does susan sarandon , but tim curry is clearly the most professional having extensive stage experience . meatloaf sings like meatloaf . the new special edition contains two original movie trailers of the film as well as two songs deleted from the original version . sadly , the songs are tacked after the credits- kind of defeats the purpose . if you want to see a different film , watch this one ! !

when _star wars_ came out some twenty years ago , the image of traveling throughout the stars has become a commonplace image . when the millenium falcon moves throughout the stars , we see constellations , meteor showers , and cool space-ships . when han solo goes light speed , the stars change to bright lines , going towards the viewer in lines that converge at an invisible point . cool . _october sky_ offers a much simpler image--that of a single white dot , traveling horizontally across the night sky . was it really only forty years ago , when sputnik was launched , and that before then , no satellites ever existed ? have we become so technologically advanced that we have forgotten that it was nearly two generations ago where people stood outside to breathlessly see a then-technological achievement , even though it was from the russians ? it sounds hokey , but when that scene occurs near the beginning of _october sky_ , i found myself caught up with the enthusiasm of homer hickam , played by jake gyllenhaal . determined to make a dent in the space race , he becomes transfixed with his desire to make a rocket that could fly like the best of them . it is films like this that we know the ending as we buy the ticket . when lovely teacher miss riley ( played by laura dern ) , suggests that he enters his findings into the national science fair , we know exactly who is going to win . but the joy in a film like this is in the little details . for example , homer is clearly not the strongest student in his class . if he has any strengths whatsoever , it is an undeterring vision , and a good organizer . it means that he may have to lose his reputation by associating with the nerdiest kid in school , who knows more about rocket science than he does . it means that if his father forbids him to shoot rockets on company property ( that is , the entire coal-mining town ) , he must walk eight miles one way , just to set up the rockets , which will fail , fail , fail , and fail again . homer+s dad is played by chris cooper , a favorite actor of mine since _lone star_ . here he plays the antithesis of the character he played in _matewan_ : instead of organizing union rallies , he is the head of the coal-miners , who is constantly wringing his hands against the unions . this is will be one of the great unnoticed performances of the year : note how multi-dimensional his character is . he is his son+s last nemesis , as one who most likely interferes with his son+s dreams . but he truly loves his son , and wants to see him succeed the only way he knows how . through coal-mining . because of his character , we can see how far we+ve come . the revolution of modern technology has allowed for us to see society advanced at a rate far faster than any generation before us . we don+t understand that there were the generations from the industrial revolution who knew of no other way to raise a family . the paradigm was shifting under the father+s feet , and he knew of no other life . so _october sky_ , far from being merely a feel-good inspirational film , offers much food for thought . and this is the best type of inspirational film ; the one that you take something with you . btw , the final image of the film is just as simple , is as strong a contrast as the aforementioned horizontal-moving white dot against the night-sky background . another commonplace image , to be sure , but it must have been breathtaking forty years ago .

guilt . guilt is something i felt while watching basic instinct for the ninth time ; the penultimate t & a thriller , basic instinct made my last few teenage years worth living . but i know so well that it's a terrible film , made by a terrible director incapable of feeling guilt . verhoeven went on to make the even more offensive showgirls and , on november seventh , 1997 , unleashed starship troopers to innocent moviegoers like me , who cannot control the urge to see giant bug movies . the pic begins with the most unintentional laugh of the year . a simple , white on black title card reads " starship troopers " -my friends and i speculated that the night before the prints were shipped , verhoeven realized he forgot the credits . is this how a hundred million dollar movie should open ? were the rest of the film that subdued . . . starship troopers is about a group of white , blond-haired himbos and bimbos who all have spanish last names . they graduate high school , join the military , and then , rather curiously , decide to travel to an alien planet and destroy all lifeforms on that planet . the story is so incomprehensible , and told so bombastically , it's akin to 129 minutes of someone screaming punishments at you in a foreign tongue . ( aside , club lovers will be happy to know that dance music hasn't changed in the future . ) one plus : starship troopers contains some very funny sequences , specifically the newsreels of the future . hysterically funny , actually . but the cynicism of these reports left me curious as to whether verhoeven felt pessimistic about the story in between . the storytelling lacks focus , to say the least . the politics of the film are scary . the actions of the major female characters are dictated by their out-of-control libidos . there's even a creepy sex scene : the lovely dina meyer makes out , nude , with the sickening van dien while half her face is covered by her opaque sweater , just the way he seems to like it . i use the term sickening because van dien is the least appealing actor i've encountered in a big budget picture ; all chiseled features and machismo , he even barks a eulogy at a funeral like military orders . of course , verhoeven's probably the one to blame , and perhaps i'm jealous because i'm so disgusting . at any rate , a movie called starship troopers shouldn't be about sex . exactly ten years ago , verhoeven made robocop , which was about nothing but skillfully made and oddly moving . and r-rated , despite its goofy premise . maybe it's asking too much for verhoeven to make a pg-movie , then-he's a master of insipid violence . however , ten year old boys would adore starship troopers if they could see it .

imagine this . you're given a sword and a shield and very basic , minimal training . a man you don't know tells you that this will be the last day that you will live . you are thrown into an arena with thousands of spectators wanting to see you die . you frantically monitor several closed doors which , in seconds , will release vicious enemies prepared to destroy you . you watch as the innocent friends you made in the last few days are murdered in cold blood . if you are lucky enough to survive this chaos thrown at you , you know you're going to have to do it all over again tomorrow . eventually know matter how strong or skilled you are , you're going to die . this is the life of a gladiator . you'll never have to be a gladiator and after seeing ridley scott's powerful gladiator , you'll be thankful for that . with his new film , scott has returned cinema to the fascinating age of the ancient roman empire . and like those preceding it , spartacus and ben hur , gladiator has nearly everything going for it - a strong lead actor , a wonderful supporting cast , eye-catching special effects , and a great script . since the two aforementioned films came out before the prime target viewers of gladiator ( teenagers to thirty-year-old males ) were around , a whole new genre may just be reborn and revisited . >from a weak beginning , the film starts off extremely gloomy and inauspicious . rome's best general maximus ( russell crowe ) , who has helped the empire conquer nearly everywhere they have attempted , is currently ( in the year 180 a . d . that is ) waging a war against germania . scott shoots the gory battle in an awkward style , similar to that of saving private ryan but much less effective . it's blurry , in slow motion , and the sound is muted . as soon as this artistic method began , it was hard to tell what was what and who was who . it's a good thing scott stops this after the first twenty minutes or else gladiator would have been torture to watch . instead , the general swears he will get out after this battle . he wants to go back to his family and his crops , he wants a quiet life . but , unexpectedly , he gets anything but that . the dying emperor of rome , marcus aurelius ( richard harris ) , decides to have maximus appointed new emperor of rome once he dies . he asks maximus to restore the republic by giving more power to the senators . all of this does not go well for aurelius' son , commodus ( joaquin phoenix ) who was expecting his father to name him the new emperor . jealous and upset , commodus kills his own father , names himself emperor , kills maximus' wife and son , and attempts to kill maximus . but maximus is able to escape his own death and vows to kill commodus and fulfill marcus aurelius' wishes . now a slave , the only way he can win his own freedom and complete his goal is to become a winning gladiator , who eventually are released for their success . a story of betrayal and promises , gladiator is more than just a mindless action flick . you actually care about the characters , sometimes even the evil villain commodus , who is just a young man as determined to make rome one way as maximus is determined to make it the other way . phoenix plays his character brilliantly . think of commodus as the percy wetmore ( of pant-wetter the green mile ) of the roman empire - a whiny , sleazy , " respect-me-because-my-father-was-a-good-man " brat who hates when he's not the center of attention . every scene we see commodus , he's either crying or he looks like he has just been crying . phoenix has definitely matured as an actor since to die for , and gladiator shows he's more than just river's little brother . crowe is also excellent as the film's grisly-faced hero . maximus is one of the few characters in recent cinema who actually has emotions . this guy actually acts like a anyone in his situation would act , he's no invincible superhero who only blurts out one-liners , he ( believe it or not ) acts like a human being ! the rest of the cast , including richard harris , djimon hounsou , walter hill , derek jacobi , and connie nielsen are also first rate . ridley scott , using outstanding special effects , has brilliantly recreated the roman coliseum , the loudness of the roman mob , and the city of rome in general . the visuals are breathtaking and voluminous , like a cleopatra of the year 2000 . the costuming is also wonderful from the detailed shields and armor to the exquisite dress of the upper-class politicians . gladiator is another movie you have to see on the big screen to get the most out of the experience . along with u-571 , action fans should have plenty to see in theaters this week and should expect much more excitement to come this summer of 2000 .

tibet has entered the american consciousness slowly during the past few years and burst into the forefront recently . the dalai lama has made speaking tours , tibetan designs and artifacts are showing up in shops , the plight of the people has captured the imagination of major actors and artists and now there are two big budget films within as many months . " kundun " ( " presence " , a name the monks call the young dalai lama ) opens in 1937 with the search for the 14th incarnation of the tibetan leader . a group of monks enters a village and a two-year-old child catches their attention . the young boy proves himself by identifying possessions of the previous holy man as " mine " . he and his family are then moved to a monastery in lhassa where he is to be prepared to take his position as the religious and political leader of the country . he is forced into difficult decisions when china invades the country in 1950 . the peaceful and isolated country is ill-equipped to fight off the intruders and diplomatic attempts over the next years yield no results . eventually he must make the painful choice to flee to neighboring india . comparisons to " seven years in tibet " are inevitable . both films cover much of the same ground although the earlier movie does so from a westerner's point of view and features boxoffice draw brad pitt . " kundun " features only native actors and is more of an insider's story . in some ways , this makes this film a superior concept , but it lacks the movement and spark that made " seven years " such an audience-pleaser . the actors contribute to the realistic feel of the movie ( filmed in morocco for obvious reasons ) . the only disappointment is chairman mao who looks like a wax dummy and moves as if he were a computer-generated character . on an intellectual level , it is interesting to see how two different approaches handle the same facts . some events are depicted differently and pitt's austrian mountain-climber who was portrayed as a pivotal influence in the dalai lama's life isn't even mentioned here . glossed over in " seven years " , the problems with the tibetan political system is hinted at here as the dalai lama muses " we were just about to change things " after the chinese attack . the film is magnificently beautiful thanks primarily to the cinematography of roger deakins . his lingering camera shows the exotic tibetan culture with luscious detail . especially striking is an extreme moving close up of a sand mandala grain by grain . the visual treats more than make up for the movie's faults creating a poetic meditation for the audience . walking out of the theater you feel like you have awakened from a transcendental experience . martin scorsese , known for his dark tales of the underworld ( " goodfellas " , " taxi driver " , " casino " ) has shifted gears . something of a thematic follow-up to his " the last temptation of christ " , this is his slowest film yet . oddly enough for a director with a history of graphic violence presenting a history filled with atrocities by the chinese , most of these events take place off-screen . his decision to not over-explain rituals is commendable . the stumbling oracle who spits out his prophecies while in a trance state is much more effective as a mystery than if we were spoon-fed interpretations . philip glass's score is impressive although at times it is too overwhelming and distracting . i talked to a tibetan i met outside the theater who had just seen the film and was walking back in to see it again . hearing his description of how he escaped from tibet at the age of seven and how his father was one of the soldiers accompanying the dalai lama during his trip to india , i was struck by what was missing in the movie . as grand as it looks and as historically accurate as it is , there is a distance between the audience and the movie . the film is more concerned with visuals and history and less so with human beings . with the exception of a few scenes , involvement with the characters is slight . one of those exceptions is the portrayal of the young dalai lama , shown as a mischievous boy who can't resist being a kid sometimes . an encounter with his older brother thubten j . norbu ( a retired indiana university professor ) who tells the young leader the chinese have ordered him to persuade him to accept communist rule or kill him is an outstanding moment , but there aren't many of these . even with its problems , the " kundun " experience is phenomenal , but one that i fear most will miss . many people who saw " seven years in tibet " will have a " been there , done that " attitude . it's likely that the film will miss a wide-spread appeal and public response will be the sound of one hand clapping .

when casting the key part of the voice of moses , most people's first candidate would probably not be the controversial actor val kilmer ( the saint and the island of dr . moreau ) , but he was dreamworks's choice in their first traditionally animated movie , the prince of egypt . the selection of kilmer proved to be a wise one , but the biggest risk dreamworks took wasn't in the casting department . the radical departure was that they decided to use the medium of animation to make a biblical epic , a la cecil b . demille , to move our hearts and minds rather than to tickle our funny bones . in the press kit producer penney cox says that they wanted to make a film for adults based on sophisticated themes but one that did not exclude children . animated movies for adults that are appropriate for kids and that are not comedies , now that is something fresh . let me admit up-front that i was quite skeptical as to whether dreamworks could pull it off . dreamworks's antz seemed to be a movie not quite appropriate for any age group . the prince of egypt may be harder to market than antz , but it is much more satisfying . like antz and unlike the more modest casting of pixar's a bug's life , the prince of egpyt has half of hollywood doing the voices . danny glover is the voice of jethro , jeff goldblum of aaron , steve martin of hotep , helen mirren of the queen , michelle pfeiffer of tzipporah , martin short of huy and patrick stewart of seti . you can figure out for yourself who does the voice of god . the movie , which is weakest in the story department , is a cliff's notes version of demille's the ten commandments . the script by kelly asbury and lorna cook has an obsession with touching briefly on every classic event in moses's life . demille took over three and a half hours in order to do it justice . at less than half of that , the prince of egypt rushes through so much material that it doesn't establish sufficient depth for us to bond with the characters . we meet moses when the queen finds him floating in his little basket . we watch him grow up and become best bud and a chariot racing partner to ramses ( ralph fiennes ) , the future pharaoh . moses is a free spirit and a practical joker until he finds out his true identity as a jew . ( " all i've ever known to be true is a lie , " moses complains . ) after finding out his real identity , he sees for the first time the oppression of the jewish slaves that are all around him . after leaving egypt , moses comes back to ask ramses to let moses's people go . this leads to the classic scene of the parting of the red sea , which is one of many places where computers were used to enhance the traditionally hand-drawn animation of the most of the production . it is the absolutely stunning visuals that make the movie so compelling . drawn with a rich palette of luxurious roses , blues and golds , the picture looks sumptuous from its first frame to its last . the construction of the temple is shown in blowing dust , and other scenes are shot with the glow of a rising sun . the most original visual sequence in the film occurs during a dream moses has . done with an explicit two-dimensional look , the colorful images painted on the temple walls come to life to tell their own animated story . even though it has its weaknesses , the prince of egypt is a noble attempt to carve out a new genre -- serious animated movies for adults that are acceptable for the entire family . this awe-inspiring movie deserves to be seen . the prince of egypt runs about 1 : 30 . it is rated pg for thematic elements and would be fine for the whole family . how old a kid would need to be to be interested depends on the child , but those over 8 will probably like it .

this is the first film in what would become the most successful series of horror films of all time . a fair warning to those of you who might be inclined to watch this movie for the first appearance of everyone's favorite goalie-mask-wearing homicidal maniac . jason , the guy who single handedly controlled the overpopulation problem around the crystal lake area , doesn't start his quest to find the most interesting household item with which to kill someone until the sequel . while he does have a small role in this film , we the audience have to depend on another blood thirsty maniac to rack up the body count . the plot , like every other friday the 13th movie goes something like this -- crazed killer murders as many unsuspecting teenagers as he/she/it possibly can in the space of a 90 minute movie . the reasons that the afore mentioned unsuspecting teenagers come into contact with the bloodthirsty killer are usually of little importance to the story . but for those of you out there that might actually care about such trivial matters in a movie such as a plot , here are the basics . a bunch of unsuspecting teens get a summer job at a long closed summer camp . they are days away from the arrival of the kids and they are spending their time fixing the place up and making sure it is ready for the kids . sadly , they start being butchered one by one by the bloodthirsty killer . at this point i would usually say something about the quality of acting , directing or maybe something about the high quality of the production . since i'm not going to do that , feel free to assume that if i did , it wouldn't be positive . i will say that this movie looks as if it was made for about a hundred bucks , and that includes the actors' salaries . if you are used to recent horror films like scream , you are in for a bit of a surprise . the only saving grace for friday the 13th is that it was really the first of its kind , with the killer taking real pride in their work . using as many methods of murder as they could . none of this single murder weapon stuff life that unimaginative leatherface in chainsaw massacre , or the creatively stifled imagination of halloween's michael myers who just used brute force or a really big kitchen knife . nope , in the friday the 13th movies , you can always count on the killer taking great pride in his work . one fun fact about this movie is that the cast includes a very young kevin bacon , although after this movie it is a wonder he ever worked again . the main reason to see friday the 13th is if you want to watch all of the series from the beginning . if not , stick with the later films with jason , everyone's favorite hockey fan . friday the 13th is the sort of movie that is fun to sit down and get a couple of scares from , just don't sit down expecting a whole lot .

chill factor is a carbon copy of speed with one notable exception : instead of a speeding bus , we now have an ice cream truck . the truck is driven by arlo ( cuba gooding jr . ) and mason ( skeet ulrich ) , who have been instructed by a dying scientist to transport a deadly chemical weapon to a military base by the name of fort mcgruder . this particular weapon ( nicknamed `elvis' ) must be kept below a temperature of 50 degrees , or else the shockwave will goo-iffy everything in a mile radius . that would be pretty nasty . the power of elvis is revealed in the opening scene , as dr . richard long ( david paymer ) conducts a test on an isolated tropical island . long accidentally melts 18 soldiers and defoliates virtually the entire island , due to an enormously miscalculated safety distance . the commanding officer , general brynner ( peter firth ) , is sentenced to 10 years in prison for the murder of his troops . upon his release , the general is intent on tracking the good doctor down , snatching elvis , and selling the weapon to the highest international bidder . protecting the fate of the world is a drifting hamburger flipper ( ulrich ) and a feisty ice cream delivery man ( gooding jr . ) , who must elude brynner's men and get elvis to safety at fort mcgruder . all the while , of course , they must keep the weapon below 50 degrees . this proves to be tricky . among the wild adventures arlo and mason partake in is a trip down a tree-covered mountainside in a boat , and a fist fight on top of a moving vehicle . they also crack a few dozen witty retorts that we are supposed to find amusing . to put it simply , i'll use a clever pun : chill factor should be put on ice . director hugh johnson has mixed elements from speed , broken arrow and the lethal weapon series to create a lifelessly bland cocktail of a chase movie . when there is some occasional action , the audience seems oddly detached from it . perhaps that's because we've already waded through a pool of clich ? s and boring dialogue ; all material that's been used before , and with a lot more spice . take the villains , for example . they are typical stereotypes of every terrorist that has ever walked the silver screen . they speak lines that have been recycled profusely from one movie to the next , divulge important plot details while holding their enemies at gunpoint , and act in very predictable ways . the tag-team of gooding jr . and ulrich sounds much more exciting than it is . frankly , i'm not sure i can accept cuba as an ice cream man . i suppose it's better than him dressed like a giant hot dog , selling jumbo frankfurters on a street corner . gooding displays one single emotion in this movie , which is frequently on display in lines like `i'm gonna get on yo ass like last year's underwear ! ' and the incessant sputtering of `oh , sh * t ! ' this is virtually the same character he played in jerry maguire and as good as it gets . but where gooding was once an exciting actor , he now seems dull and endlessly monotonous . at least he's a bit more captivating than ulrich , who has all the film's worst dialogue , but does nothing noticeable to enliven his character . the supporting cast , which includes every personality you expect to pop up , is also wasted . to be fair , there are a few brief moments of serviceable action . and i did chuckle a few times . one example is when ulrich ( an employee at `darlene's diner' ) is at the counter when brynner walks through the door . `you own this place ? ' the general asks . `yeah , ' ulrich says . `they call me darlene . ' these little tidbits of humor are ( mainly ) welcome in this weak , disappointing wreckage of an action film . as a speed clone , it could have benefited from a lot more suspense and perhaps ( god forbid ) even some decent writing . sadly , i walked away from chill factor only wondering how much fun it could have been .

a standoff . a man holds a woman , a diplomat's daughter , hostage in his embrace , a gun pressed to her head . a cop , impaired by drink due to his wife's philandering , trains his gun on the man's nether regions , threatening to shoot . another cop holds his gun to his partner's temple , forcing him to disarm . the scene unfolds like a foursome bidding in bridge--upping the ante , signaling tacitly , going for game . the second cop retrieves the first cop's weapon , the suspect lowers his , and the woman caught in the middle moves--in slow motion--to safety . it is then that the intoxicated officer makes his move , grabbing for the assailant's gun . the room turns upside down , a shot rings out , a cop is down . shot in the back and paralyzed for life . the young man who found himself in the wrong place at the wrong time is sent to prison for six years for a crime he didn't commit . storytelling has always been one of pedro almod ? var's greatest gifts and in " live flesh " he gives us a twisting , turning , compelling tale peppered with well-written , colorful characters . characters who find themselves , more often than not , in carefully-constructed scenes like these . characters played by actors we might not know , but who look strikingly familiar nevertheless . take the ruggedly handsome victor plaza ( liberto rabal ) , for instance . before he gets out of prison he could easily be mistaken for that almod ? var favorite , antonio banderas . when we first meet elena ( francesca neri ) , the woman in the middle of the nervous shakedown , she looks like spice girl barbie with her frizzy shock of orange hair , but later tones down her look sufficiently to pass for juliette lewis . elena's husband david ( javier bardem ) is the cop crippled in the shooting and he wears david schwimmer's bemused expression throughout . playing the inebriated cop and his cheating wife are jos ? sancho and angela molina--no lookalikes spring to mind , but they round out the excellent cast . it's a credit to almod ? var's craft that these five individuals cross paths and intertwine with such credulity . " live flesh " begins and ends with a live birth and the film's contradictions come almost as often as the contractions . between the two childbearings , coincidence , irony , and a hefty dollop of sex form the key elements of this thoroughly entertaining film . although based on a ruth rendell story , " live flesh " is brimming with the acclaimed spanish director's high-heeled flourishes . women are at times alluring and repulsive , their extravagant hairdos and animal print coats providing colorful highlights to the intricately-woven drama , an eye bruised by an abusive husband here , a mouth bloodied by an impromptu delivery there . while in prison , victor learns bulgarian from an inmate and learns to love the bible , quoting from deuteronomy thereafter not unlike the way by which david and sancho refer to themselves as " guardians of a sick flock . " victor's pre-fab inheritance is a shambles in a slum resembling sarajevo . " dear son , i got cancer " his mother writes to him in jail . she dies before he is released and it's at the cemetery that victor is reacquainted with elena--redemption , ultimately , substituting for revenge .

the " italian hitchcock " and acknowledged master of the giallo murder-mystery dario argento again offers us a fascinating turn on the formula in pheneomena . this time the twist comes in the form of jennifer corvino ( jennifer connelly ) , a bright teenager with gift for telepathically communicating with insects . sent to a girls boarding school in switzerland , she soon learns of a series of bizarre disappearances and at least one murder that has the school's population terrified . a chance meeting with a brilliant entomologist ( donald pleasance ) leads the two of them to team up and solve the mystery with the aid of her remarkable gift . phenomena is an imaginative , original thriller . writer/director argento creates several sequences of surreal , haunting beauty here , including a masterfully shot sleepwalking episode and a striking scene when a swarm of flying insects descends on the school at jennifer's beckoning . the plot takes some wonderfully bizarre turns and the killer's identity is genuinely shocking and surprising . the director took a big gamble with a soundtrack that mixes elements as diverse as heavy metal band iron maiden , ex-rolling stone bill wyman , and argento's favourite gothic/electronic outfit goblin . but it gels surprisingly well . the film's opening music reccurs several times , an eerie and evocative score that perfectly sets the overall tone . argento fans beware : the film was released outside europe in a terribly butchered form re-titled as creepers . this deleted nearly half an hour of footage , mainly of key dialogue scenes .

after hearing reviews for woody allen's upteenth movie in history , " celebrity , " range from terribly boring to just so-so , my heart lept when the opening images of the film closely resembled that of " manhattan , " my personal favorite from my personal favorite director of all time . woody allen's films almost never rely on visual flair over textual flair , so when one of his films closely resembles the one time that these two entities fit hand-in-hand ( " manhattan " really is one of the best-looking films i've ever seen , beautiful black and white photography of the city's best areas , etc . ) , a fan can't help but feel visibly moved . the film opens up , with the usual credits with plain white font over black backgrounds , and an old ironic standard playing on the soundtrack , but then the screen fills with a gorgeous dull gray sky , with the word " help " being spelled with an airplane . beethoven's 5th blasts on the soundtrack . the city seems to stop to take notice of this moment , and it's all rather lovely to look at . and then we cut to a film crew , shooting this as the film's hilariously banal key moment in the film , where the lead actress in the film ( melanie griffith , looking as buxom and beautiful as ever ) has to realize something's wrong with her life or whatever . it's a terribly stale scene for a woody allen film , with the great opening shots or without , and my heart sank and i soon got used to the fact that once again , a new film of his was not going to be as great as his past works ( though , for the record , last year's " deconstructing harry " came awfully close ) . what the hell has happened to him ? the man who once could be relied on for neurotic freshness in cinema has not become less funny , but his films have become less insightful and more like he tossed them together out of unfinished ideas . " bullets over broadway , " though wonderful , relies on irony to pull a farce that just never totally takes off . " mighty aphrodite " is more full of great moments and lines than a really great story . " everyone says i love you " was more of a great idea than a great film . even " deconstructing harry " is admittingly cheap in a way , even if it does top as one of his most truly hilarious films . if anything , the reception of " celebrity " by everyone should tip allen off to the fact that this time , it's not the audience and critics who are wrong about how wonderful his film is : it's him . " celebrity " is , yes , a good film , but it's only marginally satisfying as a woody allen film . instead of creating the great woody allen world , he's created a world out of a subject he knows only a bit about . and he's fashioned a film that is based almost entirely on his uninformed philosophy of celebrities , so that it plays like a series of skits with minor connections . it's like " la dolce vita " without the accuracy , the right amount of wit , and the correct personal crisis . woody , becoming more insecure in his old age , choses to drop the woody allen character in on the world of celebrities , and then hang him and all his flaws up for scrutiny , and does this by casting not himself but brit actor kenneth branagh in the lead . much has been said about his performance - dead on but irritating , makes one yearn for the real thing , blah blah blah - but to anyone who actually knows the woody allen character knows that branagh's performance , though featuring some of the same mannerisms ( stuttering , whining , lots o' hand gestures ) , is hardly a warts-and-all impersonation . branagh brings along with him little of the woody allen charm , which actually allows for his character's flaws to be more apparent . woody's a flawed guy , and we know it , but we love him anyway , because he's really funny and really witty and really intelligent . branagh's allen is a bit more flat-out bad , but with the same charm so that , yes , we like him , but we're still not sure if he's really a good person or not . his character , lee simon , is first seen on the set of the aforementioned movie , hits on extra actress winona ryder , then goes off to interview griffith , who takes him to her childhood home where he makes a pass at her , and she denies him . . . sorta . we then learn , through flashbacks , that lee has been sucked into trying to be a celebrity thanks to a mid-life crisis and an appearance at his high school reunion . he has since quit his job as a travel journalist and become a gossip journalist of sorts , covering movie sets and places where celebrities congregate , so that he can meet them , and maybe sell his script ( a bank robbery movie " but with a deep personal crisis " ) . as such , he has divorced his wife of several years ( allen regular judy davis ) , and continues on a quest for sexual happiness , boucing from girlfriend to girlfriend and fling to fling over the course of the film . after griffith comes his escapades with a model ( charlize theron ) who is " polymorphously perverse " ( glad to see allen is using new jokes , ha ha ) , who takes him for a wild ride not different from that of the anita ekberg segment of " la dolce vita . " following are his safe relationship with smart working woman famke janssen , a relationship that almost assures him success , and his continued escapades with ryder , whom he fancies most of all . his story is juxtaposed with that of davis , who flips out , but stumbles onto happiness when she runs into a handsome , friendly tv exec ( joe mantegna ) who lands her a job that furthers her career to national status . while lee is fumbling about , selfishly trying to ensure his own happiness , davis becomes happy ( " i've become the kind of woman i've always hated . . . and i'm loving it . " ) without doing a thing . the result is a film of highs and mediums . the mediums are what take up most of the film , with sitations and scenes which don't exactly work but you can't help but pat allen on the back for trying . but other places are really great scenes . the opening . the sequence with theron , which is so good that i wished it hadn't ended . a banana scene with bebe neuwirth ( droll as ever ) . and , perhaps the best sequence : a romp with hot-as-hell teen idol , brandon darrow , played by none other than leo dicaprio , who is so un-dicaprio-esque that if any of this fans could sit through this film , they'd never look at him the same way . he ignites the screen with intensity , and spares nothing in showing his character as narcissistically tyrannical , and totally heartbreaking for lee , who comes to him to talk about his script that he has read , and finds himself on a wild all-day ride with him . they go to atlantic city to watch a fight , they gamble , and they wind up in his hotel room , where darrow gets it on with his flame ( gretchen mol ) and he lends him one of the leftover groupies . allen's writing in these scenes are so good that just for them , i'd almost recommend the film . almost . but what i really liked about this film is despite the fact that it's a mess , despite the fact that what this film really needs is a good old fashioned rewrite by allen himself , it's still a smart and insightful film . though some of the jokes are either stale or misplaced ( some seem too cartoonish , even for this environment ) , allen still manages to get across that this film is not exactly about celebrities , as it may seem to be ( if it were , it'd be extremely out-of-touch ) , but about those who want to be celebrities , and how they equate celebrity-hood with happiness . we never get close enough to the actual celebrities to see if they're really happy ( they may appear to be on the surface . . . ) , but we do get close enough to lee and davis' character . lee is obsessed with the phenomenon , while davis takes is at arm's length , and never gets too involved in what it is , and soon becomes one herself . besides , it's witty , and it does have the one thing that no other film has but allen's : that great woody allen feel . it may be not exactly fresh and lively or totally brilliant in its depiction of its subject , and yes , as a part of woody allen's oeuvre , it's merely a blip ( no " annie hall " but it's no " shadows and fog " either ) , but it goes to prove that no one can make a film like him , and only he and maybe godard could possibly take a totally horrible metaphor , like the one in the beginning , and make it work not once but twice .

" oh my god , i sounded just like a mother ! " mrs . pascal , played with devilish wickedness by genevieve bujold , tells her son . " didn't i sound just like a mother ? " " you are a mother , " her son marty tells her disgustedly . " i know , but i still can't believe it . i look at you people and wonder , how did you ever fit in my womb ? " marty , you see , is a grown-up twin . although his sister , who thinks she is jackie-o , is certifiably insane , marty fits right in with the rest of this highly dysfunctional family in the witty black comedy the house of yes . mother and daughter , played in a brilliant performance by parker posey , are both varying degrees of wacko . most dysfunctional families in the movies are more angry and mean-spirited than diabolically abnormal as this one is . the daughter's fantasy of being jackie-o is probably the most sane part of her being . mrs . pascal is the sort that will not let jackie-o keep a hairbrush downstairs since food is kept on that level . she explains to marty's new fiancee , lesly ( tori spelling ) , soon after their first meeting that jackie-o was holding marty's private part when she came out of the womb . the dialog by wendy macleod , based on the play by mark waters , is so sharp and biting that it seems in danger of cutting through the celluloid at any moment . the script , reminiscent of a david mamet play , flows smoothly with its fast paced intelligence and mesmerizing set of bizarre characters . the exaggerated setup has lesly and marty arriving at the family's out of the way mansion during a thanksgiving day hurricane . in this storm are two sane individuals . the fiancee is a giddy , school-girl type , embarrassed by everything , a complete contrast to her rival jackie-o's bitter pseudo-sophistication . as the two twins' younger brother , anthony , freddie prinze jr . plays the all-america boy type whose only foible is his explicit obsession of bedding his brother's fiancee that night . " we all have our secrets , " jackie-o tells her potential sister-in-law , and boy , does she have a few . this is a house filled with them . ( when lesly calls it the family's " home " to mrs . pascal -- they've never had a visitor before lesly -- mrs . pascal becomes discombobulated until she realizes that lesly is talking about their " house . " ) in a film that gives new meaning to the phrase , " made for each other , " the twin's biggest , but not their only secret , is that they've had a long-term incestuous relationship . they don't like to discuss it , although they are not particularly ashamed of it . perfect for viewers who can appreciate perverse comedy , this story never pulls its punches . jackie-o tries in many ways , few subtle , to show that she is a better match for marty than that ditzy fiancee of his . in one scene marty and lesly are playing chop sticks together on the piano when jackie-o pushes her aside and starts playing a challenging classical piece for four hands . marty joins her as his fiancee looks on with envy . the chemistry between parker posey and josh hamilton is nothing short of amazing . they put down their little brother and most of the other sane people in the world . their ripostes are engaging filmmaking at its best . director mark waters keeps the show's energy level high and lets the leads sling zingers at each other at a furious pace . his crisp direction ensures the movie has nary an ounce of fat on it . jackie-o is temperamentally incapable of being nice . and being jealous , she cuts lesly down mercilessly . " were you poor ? " jackie-o asks her when she finds that lesly committed the crime of growing up impoverished . " did you eat pies ? chicken pot pies ? " " pancakes actually , lots of pancakes , " lesly replies with her usual sincerity . " a donut king , so is she like the queen ? , " jackie-o cattily inquires of marty when she learns that lesly works at a donut king . " are we entertaining royalty ? " with rolfe kent's whimsically sinister music it never seems clear where the story is headed . will it end in a big emotional explosion , a murder , people slowly cutting each other up with words , a familial catharsis , a weather disaster or what ? the emotionally charged play is clearly going somewhere , and the engaging characters captivate the audience with their spell . i'll not say more except that the ending is perfect and a bit of a surprise . the house of yes runs a blazing fast 1 : 25 . it is rated r for sexual situations and conversations , mature themes , violent overtones and some profanity . the movie would be fine for older and mature teenagers , i . e . , treat the movie as it were rated nc-17 .

the coen brothers are back again , this time with homer's " odyssey " as the backdrop in their tale of three fugitives from a mississippi chain gang who trek across the south to find a secret treasure in " o brother , where art thou ? " right for the beginning of " o brother " the coens grab your attention with a chain gang of prison inmates breaking rocks along the road in unison to a work song . the camera flows around the hard toiling men , giving a visually exciting symmetry to the scene that ends with our three heroes - ulysses everett mcgill ( george clooney ) , delmar ( tim blake nelson ) and pete ( john turturro ) - escaping across a cotton field . it is the beginning of a journey that takes on different meanings and urgencies to each member of the trio . a strong suite , as always with the coen brothers , is the depth of character of the folks they create in their films . their characters are goofy and comical , like nicolas cage in " raising arizona " ; or , dramatic , as albert finney and john turturro in " miller's crossing " ; and , even a mix of the two with frances mcdormand in " fargo . " in all cases , and in " o brother , " too , the characters populating their films are three-dimensional people . ulysses everett is a handsome , hair-obsessed petty criminal with a silver tongue and not a lot in the brains department . but , he seems like a genius when compared to the simple , sweet delmar and the maladjusted pete , who follow their self appointed leader to a promised treasure of $1 . 2 million . their odyssey takes on the mystical proportions of homer's original material as they meet all manner of people along the way , including those dangerous sirens who beckon them onto symbolically rocky shoals and a cyclops who beats them and takes all their money . there is magic , too , when delmar believes that pete was turned into a horny toad by the sirens . the story meanders through the different vignettes of the boys' adventures , giving the flick a choppy , episodic feel that disrupts the overall flow . some of the interludes are an epiphany , though . the trio becomes a quartet when they pick up guitar-playing tommy johnson ( chris thomas king ) and visit a radio station in the middle of nowhere , run by its blind owner ( stephen root ) . they become the soggy bottom boys for the sightless radio station man and , without their knowledge , are recorded as they sing the traditional tune , " i am a man of constant sorrow . " it is a wonderful moment of moviemaking and gives us , in my mind , the best movie song of the year . contrasting this and other wonderful moments ( the sexy seduction by the sirens comes to mind ) are some pretentious bits that detract from the overall quality of " o brother . " in particular , near the end , is a scene where ulysses , delmar and pete crash a ku klux klan rally to save tommy from being lynched . the scene is overblown and flashy and reeks of " the wizard of oz . " they don't say " lions and tigers and bears , oh my ! " and there's no dorothy , but it is the land of oz we're seeing here . the highs and lows of the story flow are tempered by fine acting on several levels . george clooney is funny , charming , a little dumb and one of the handsomest actors in the business today . he has the charm of a 30's movie idol and is able to put himself into silly situations with dignity . ulysses has an ongoing obsession with his hair , risking life and limb to get a particular brand of pomade and a supply of hairnets . his vanity will come to plague him as it would any mystical hero-wanderer . while clooney is the name draw for " o brother , " the show stealer is tim blake nelson as delmar . the heretofore unknown nelson is terrific as the simple convict who , at one point , hears the word of the lord and joins members of a church congregation in their mass baptism . delmar is saved and dedicates his life to doing good and provides a richness to his simple character that makes him shine . the taciturn pete , as played by longtime coen collaborator turturro , is the sullen member of the trio and gives them the necessary angst . all together , the tuneful triumvirate is a mix of the three stooges and the three musketeers as they prove to be buffoons , albeit brave ones . the colorful supporting cast is rampant with homerian characters to meet and get to know along the way of the boys' odyssey . charles durning appears as incumbent governor pappy o'daniel , who keeps crossing paths with them in his bid for re-election . john goodman is wicked as the one-eyed bible salesman and con artist , big dan teague . michael badalucco is manic and outrageous as outlaw and bank robber extraordinary , george " babyface " nelson . stephen root is amusing as the blind dj , rep'ing one of the many references to the sightless that abound in the film in mystical ways . holly hunter is wasted in the small role as ulysses' estranged wife , penny ( and the real reason for this adventure , not secret treasure ) . techs are , as expected in a coen brothers venture , first class . cinematographer roger deakins , who has worked on five previous coen films , captures the sultry atmosphere of the south . the photography complements the lush period production and costume provided by dennis gassner and mary zophres , respectively . once again , roderick jaynes - the alter ego of ethan and joel coen - is on board as editor . the high points outweigh the low through most of " o brother , where art thou ? " with particular praise for the wonderful selection of period and traditional music . i give it a b .

sam ( matthew broderick ) is an astronomer in a small american town and engaged to teacher linda ( kelly preston ) . he is head over heels in love and lindas sudden departure to new york city to live with her new lover anton ( tch ? ky karyo ) comes as a complete surprise to him . but as we all know love is blind and so sam leaves for new york as well to win her back . he moves into an abandoned house across the street from anton's apartment and installs a camera obscura to watch them . suddenly anton's ex maggie shows up , but she does not want her former lover back . on the contrary , all she wants to do is vaporize him . she may say that she doesn't want to kill him , but the possibility doesn't bother her too much either . after all , people die every day . in spite of their different motives the two team up and fall for each other as things move on . the story sounds like something we all have seen a million times . but we haven't . griffin dunne brings us the most charming comedy since " while you where sleeping " . the camera obscura adds a " special something " to the movie and makes it an exceptional romantic comedy . everything about the movie is perfect , from set design to casting . the dialogues are inspired and the touches of black humor add a certain bite . meg ryan , known from " when harry met sally " or " sleepless in seattle " , surprises in a role that may finally help her get rid of her sweet little girl image . she impresses the viewer as a maneating biker girl . even more surprising is the fact that the viewer believes her , much more so than in last years " courage under fire " where she played a gulf war pilot . matthew broderick is the goodnatured and somewhat naive sam who has trouble accepting reality . the viewer can tell that he doesn't only watch the stars but also tries to reach out for them . he has trouble keeping in touch with reality . after all , who would leave everything behind to chase a lost love ? his naivet ? that we don't question for a minute throughout the movie clashes with maggies exaggerated wish for revenge . she would do anything to harm anton . she doesn't hesitate to use sam for her plan and makes him understand right from the beginning that nothing will happen between the two of them . that makes the scenes when they innocently share a bed , have potatoe chips and watch the action across the street like a saturday night show on tv even funnier . tch ? ky karyo is perfect as anton . he is , well , repulsive . that's all there is to say about him . you can't really manage to pity him , even after all his mishaps . he not only took sam's bride away from him , he is also a french chef . worlds collide , i . e . the usa and france . this can only go wrong . even if maggies revenge schemes are at times shocking , you just can't sympathize with a man who plays " je t'aime . . . moi non plus " on his tape deck . not everyone is captured by the french charme that linda and even maggie fell for . sam certainly isn't . too bad for anton . for him things take a turn to the worse . " addicted to love " is one of this year's most pleasant surprises .

defending your life is an imaginative vision of the afterlife from the twisted mind of writer-director albert brooks , who also stars in the comedy . after dying in a car crash , on his birthday of all days , brooks wakes up in judgement city , a satirical rendition of purgatory where higher beings evaluate the lives of newly deceased earthlings . brooks has five days to convince two judges that he's worthy of passing on to higher plains of existence . enter rip torn as the slick lawyer who defends brooks in court against prosecutor lee grant . during his " trial , " brooks must view episodes of his life on a movie screen , and these scenes are both hysterically funny and painfully poignant . it's impossible to resist chuckling ( and cringing ) at brooks as he and torn try to explain away his cowardly behavior on earth . torn , in particular , is in vintage comic form , and he walks away with the picture . the movie also features meryl streep , appealing as the love-interest , and shirley maclaine , who pops up in a hilarious cameo . while the film is uneven , many of its gags are price less . take , for example , the food in judgement city : it's always the most delicious you've ever tasted . . . and it's also calorie-free--so chow down !

like a good action film should , " metro " has action that keeps you involved . some action films have action sequences that are so conventional , our attention is detracted and diverted by other thoughts . " the ghost in the darkness , " which opened a few months ago , is a film that s action was so bland and uninvolving , it not only invited my thoughts to divert me , it nearly put me asleep . but " metro " is one of the best action films in a while . it is hip , sharp , nifty , and has nice little pieces of suspense and comedy . eddie murphy was in bad shape for a while . and this invites me to mention last year s " the nutty professor , " which was his blessed revival back to the position at which he used to be . " metro " happens to be a lot better than any film in the " beverly hills cop " series . that is because " metro " takes itself seriously , but doesn t prevent itself from having a little fun . eddie murphy is at his best in the roles of responsible , and controlled people . the " beverly hills cop " movies all featured eddie as a reckless , wild cop , always crossing the line by just an inch . in " metro " he plays a hostage negotiator , so negotiation is his job , not his hobby or his preferred way out of trouble . his character in " metro " takes himself seriously . eddie murphy s mischievous trademark grin is hardly anywhere to be found in " metro , " and perhaps it is quite better off that way . murphy plays scott roper , and as i previously mentioned , he is a san francisco hostage negotiator . in the first tense situation in the film , we are introduced to roper s kind of work , as he tries to calm down a confused , unkempt young criminal who has taken captive the entire capacity of the san francisco bank he is holding up . murphy handles the scene seriously , without his usual happy-go-lucky , misfit humor . the film develops when its villain is established , and the villain here is the beguiling michael korda , a jewel thief , and murderer who likes to let cops know of his hostage fatalities by giving them the ear of the victim . " metro " takes different twists and slight turns , and there is one great , virtuoso chase scene , involving the a cable car . cars flip . cars crash . cars turn over . and it is done so good in this film , i was reminded of " speed , " and the speeding bus that couldn t go under fifty mile per hour for very significant reasons . there are also some other good scenes in " metro " that a lot of films would rather choose not to have . scenes like the one with roper and his new partner are at the horse track roper is a gambler who knows all the tricks and roper teaches his partner a few little methods of betting and winning . of course , the writers tried to disguise the scene as being insignificant by having roper draw parallels between hostage negotiation and gambling . the scenes between roper and his girlfriend are nice , too . those are the scenes that make up " metro , " which is mainly about eddie murphy s maturing as a personality . the actor that i most enjoyed seeing in " metro " was michael rapaport , who plays roper s new partner , a lip-reading , book-skimming genius , and a master of observation . it was not the actor s presence that pleased me as much as the role he was cast in the role of a proclaimed genius . rapaport is an actor who i usually see in the role of the dimwit the really , really dopey dimwit . i hardly recognized him in " metro , " and it was quite a joy to be able to see him in a role like this i feel that i respect him more . there are two main types of villains in movies like this : the ones that are part of the story , and the ones that are devices . the villain in " metro " is no more than a device , but he is a darn good villain nonetheless . he is played by michael wincott , whose voice is pushed out in a abraded rasp , as if he smokes a cigarette between every take . wincott makes his villain , korda , as mean as could be , the classic type of villain who would push an old lady down a flight of stairs just for kicks , like richard widmark in " kiss of death . " and , in addition , wincott s physical appearance and mannerisms , in the film , actually reminded my of an arrogant friend i use to have , who is no longer on my good list . i liked " metro , " and i do not think would have worked with any other actor but eddie murphy . his past roles were the great ones but they were also a precursor to the maturing that would later take place , possibly from murphy s growing as a person , now having a family . " metro " is a no-nonsense movie . it works as a buddy movie , which it does not overplay . it works as a dry comedy , which it does not overplay . it works as a suspense film , which it does not overplay . and it works as an action film , where it does have a tendency to occasionally go all-out . but who cares ? it still remains serious , and it does not overdo itself . oh , and there were plenty of explosions in " metro , " as well . how nice it was of the filmmakers to give us those . if there is one major objection i had to " metro " , it was the length , an area where a lot of action films seem to wear out their welcomes . " metro " is a film that lasted a little too long , but it was still entertaining , and it gave me something to do while i waited for it to end . paul haynes " >

118 minutes ; not rated ( though i suspect it would be rated pg for adult themes and language ) mamoru oshii is a name that probably isn't very well-known to most american audiences , but perhaps it should be . oshii was the director of last year's best-known japanese animated film import , _ghost in the shell_ , and is known among fans of japanese animation , or anime , for making films with a deep philosophical bent . one of these films was the first theatrical venture for the patlabor animated series . in its many incarnations--graphic novels ( " manga " ) , two different runs of made-for-video episodes ( original animation videos , or oavs for short ) , and a television series running to nearly fifty episodes--patlabor has proven to be one of the most popular series ever in japan . set in the very near future ( though it was a somewhat farther away near future when the series was first conceived ) , this atypical giant robot anime features the characters , rather than the machinery , as the primary focus . as a whole , patlabor is the story of an exciting time for japan . as the prologue to each episode of the television series explains , giant industrial robots , known as " labors " ( an interesting play on words , considering that " robot " is derived from the czech word for labor ) , have come into widespread use in japan toward the close of the twentieth century . with the rise of labors , however , has come a new menace--labor crime . this led to the creation of the two special vehicle divisions , using patrol labors to fight labor crime . the patlabor story centers around the second special vehicle division , sv2 , who , through no fault of their own , have acquired a bad reputation for destructiveness . sometimes utterly hilarious , sometimes almost deadly serious , the patlabor series explores the interpersonal relationships of the special vehicle crewmembers , and also looks at the effects of technology on modern life . those who are unfamiliar with the patlabor story and characters may find themselves slightly confused coming into the movie , although there is ample background exposition provided for new viewers . the story , as has much of patlabor before , centers around the controversial babylon project , a gigantic seawall that will , on its completion , allow the reclamation of thousands of square miles of land from tokyo bay . this project has been an almost constant target of environmentalist terrorists , most notably the house of sea organization . however , the threat in this case comes not from any terrorist , but from someone who is already dead . . . shinohara heavy industries , the premier labor manufacturer in japan ( if not the whole world ) , has just come out with a new operating system that increases labors' movement speed and efficiency by 30% . this hyper operating system , hos for short , has very quickly been installed into well over 90% of the nation's labors . . . including the patrol labors of sv2 . since that installation , dozens of labors , including a heavily-armed military model , have begun to go on berzerk rampages for no apparent reason . . . and the only factor they all had in common was that they were all running under the new hos . ( some wags have compared this to windows 95 . ) it's up to asuma shinohara , labor command officer with sv2 and the son of the president of shinohara heavy industries , to find the source of these problems before more labors--including sv2's own--fall victim to them , and before hos drags his father's company down with it . as was the case with _ghost in the shell_ , if you just want a no-brainer actionfest , this might not be the movie for you . _patlabor : the movie_ is more of a psychological thriller , a technological suspense drama . it is closer , perhaps , to a chrichton novel than to an action movie ( crichton novels that have been made _into_ action movies notwithstanding ) . there are long , thoughtful montages of dialogueless footage as two investigators make their way through slums and derelict housing in old quarters of tokyo , similar to sequences from _ghost in the shell_ . this movie is fraught with symbolism--in fact a large part of it is based on christian symbolism . patlabor's near-future setting is , aside from the giant robots tromping around , very similar to our own present day . the film uses this setting to make its central point : is progress moving too fast for humans to keep up ? are history and culture falling by the wayside like the old buildings that are being torn down and replaced with new ? this is a question just as applicable to today as it is to patlabor's alternate-1999 setting . as far as the technical aspects of the film go ( referring to the subtitled version , as that's the only one i've seen ) , the film transfer is clear , almost phenomenally so . the animation quality is incredible , though the character design is different from what most patlabor fans will be used to . the oavs and tv series were more cheerful , better-suited to humor ; the movie , however , makes everyone look a great deal less cute , and emphasizes that this is going to be , for the most part , a deadly serious storyline . as far as cinematography goes , there are many interesting moments in _patlabor : the movie_ . i don't think i can recall ever seeing a fish-eye perspective used in any other animated film ( save for _ghost in the shell_ , another oshii film ) , or indeed , in many other movies at all . the cinematography is well-suited to the storyline , emphasizing what it needs to , though a couple of scenes ( where characters' features are exaggerated in anger ) may seem slightly strange to western audiences . the audio track of _patlabor : the movie_ is in glorious hi-fi stereo , and should be used to demonstrate home theater systems--it _is_ that good . even without headphones , sounds from either side of the screen can be clearly heard to _come_ from that side . giant robot footsteps are deep and booming . the sometimes-understated , sometimes-blaring score is crisp and clear , and always right on the mark , enhancing the moods created by the animated scenery . as far as the subtitles go , i have to say that they're among the most easily-readable subtitles i've ever seen for _anything_ . large enough that they don't strain the eyes , but small enough not to conceal too much of the screen . although it does have several action sequences in it , most notably the climactic conclusion , _patlabor_ is foremost not an action movie . although it is a superbly-realized film , it relies in large part upon prior familiarity with some of the characters to carry the story , and that could detract from some people's enjoyment . my .

an energetic , visually stunning , but intellectually hollow recreation of the mysterious life of jeanne d'arc . in history jeanne d'arc is lost in an ocean of mystery and controversy , which creates the perfect launching pad for talented and creative directors , who can basically alter the story as they wish . she came in a time where people desperately needed a saint . a hero that could rescue them for misery and deliver peace and happiness . director/writer luc besson ( 'nikita' , 'leon' ) portrays his version of the peasant girl who commanded the armies of france and was burned at the stake for witchcraft . besson tries to recreate the person behind the legend . he tries not to show her as a saint or a villain . he shows her as a human being . in a time where blood was almost pouring from the sky , and the air smelled of rotten flesh , it is hard to keep your sanity . the only support and hope is in god . at the age of 13 , jeanne ( milla jovovich ) watches her own sister murdered and raped by the english soldiers . this terrible event makes a lasting impact on jeanne's mind . god is no longer her support . he has become her obsession . she starts seeing visions and signs that command her to raise an army and free france from the siege of the english tyranny . with the help of the wise yolande d'aragon ( faye dunaway ) and charles vii ( john malcovich ) , whose grand royal ambitions and life are at stake , jeanne raises an army and marches towards the english walls . after this the film stays mostly on the battlefield , where besson demonstrates his ability to direct amazing action sequences , only occasionally resorting to a calmer tempo . the movie is filled with dreamy , symbolic images of pure artistic craftsmanship , that create a surreal and occasionally paranoiac atmosphere . the film is lost in time and space , hysterically jumping back and forth in jeanne's thoughts , imagination and conscience . besson's visual style permits the audience to enter the medieval age , feel the smell of fresh blood and the adrenaline pumping in your body in the heat of battle . but the film is far from being flawless . the script needs a lot of polishing . except for jeanne , there are no real characters . and although a grand star cast is assembled , their characters are nothing more than props , not more alive than the costumes that they are wearing . as for the maiden of lorraine herself , she is portrayed as a simple girl , too small for her divine task . in the latter part of the film , we see her as hysterical , confused and on the brink of madness , with her past purity and innocence for ever lost . jovovich handles the part with more panache than one might expect . but though her screen time is incredible excessive , both malcovich ( 'being john malcovich' ) and dunaway ( 'titus' ) surpass her rather overacted and simply unprofessional performance . and even hoffman manages to breathe some life into his dreadfully small part . besides casting jovovich , besson's only mistake is his extreme sense of patriotism that in the end ruins his so gloriously crafted painting . there are some viscously evil englishmen that murder , pillage and betray with a smile on their faces . and some incredibly brave and noble frenchmen , represented by the " three musketeers " of this story -- the brave gilles de rais ( vincent cassel ) , the wise aulon ( desmond harrington ) and the strong la hire ( richard ridings ) . though all those actor perform well , their characters are nothing more than symbols -- banners that proclaim the glory of france . and thus , there is no sense of realism in this film . 'the messenger' has muscles instead of brains . there is some relief in the end , where besson lays down his armor and starts thinking . dustin hoffman's appearance helps and the film ends elegantly and surprisingly effective with a climax worthy of praise . jeanne's character is unlocked , but whether god was in the picture or not , is never quite explained . was she a confused peasant girl driven by her own hunger for revenge ? or was she truly a messenger of god ? the film poses as many questions as answers and nothing is completely obvious . bess o messenger' is nothing more than a fairly good film . it is not much that you remember of it after you leave the theater . maybe the sound , the dreamy sequences , but certainly not the dialogue . it is an elegant and adrenaline pumping history lesson for the mtv-generation , that although presents some interesting material , works better when it's on the battlefield .

billed as a " feminist sex fantasy " , this spirited , imaginative and thoroughly engaging film by the award-winning canadian director cynthia roberts , is destined for extreme reactions . camille paglia enthusiasts will no doubt champion this heart-felt tale of the title character bubbles galore ( nina hartley ) , a porn-actress-turned-porn-producer who faces an uphill battle in her quest for sexual and economic independence . however , those in the andrea dworkin camp , will no doubt loathe the film's decidedly pro-porn stance . political considerations aside , however , this is a delightful lesbian love story as the film takes us on a whirlwind tour of bubbles' romantic entanglements with a naive and virginal young porn starlet dory drawers ( shauny sexton ) . in the backdrop , however is bubbles' loyal assistant vivian klitorsky ( tracy wright ) who pines longingly for the affections of her bubbly boss . this femme-butch-femme triangle is what provides the film with considerable humanity * and * sensuality . in addition to the romantic aspects of the story , bubbles is being stalked and terrorized by her ex-boyfriend godfrey montana ( daniel macivor ) , a slimy porn mogul who wishes to make her life as miserable as he can possibly make it . when his plans to sabotage her latest film fall through , he snaps and psychotically decides to kill her . these proceedings are presided over by a most heavenly presence . god herself - yes , in the world of this film , god , is most definitely a " her " - and a chorus of undulating , scantily-clad angels , have their most watchful and lustful eyes on the events as they unfold , adding a lovely fantasy element to this frothy concoction . this bright , colourful and deliriously sexy film is chock-full of great performances . making her dramatic debut , after appearing in over 300 triple x adult films , porn star nina hartley takes command of her role with considerable assurance and a screen presence which puts many other contemporary 'straight' actresses to shame . hartley has overwhelming star power , and one wonders why other non-triple-x producers haven't used her bountiful talents . it is also interesting to note that hartley appears in the recent release of " boogie nights " , a film which takes a far more traditional doom-and-gloom approach to the porn industry . making a cameo appearance in the role of god , former porn actress annie sprinkle , a true artist in her own right - gives the entire film an earthy , sensual glow and certainly solidifies and , by her very appearance , downright justifies the themes of the movie . the other performances are equally solid . daniel macivor appropriately chews up the scenery as the villainous godfrey and tracy wright lends able support with her complex role . shauny sexton , an erotic dancer and pin-up model , makes an impressive screen debut . overall , bubbles galore is a film which wears its politics on its sleeve and very proudly indeed . at one point , the title character declares that " instead of trying to save women from the sex trade , we should be working to ensure that the sex trade is a safe place for women to work " . the direction by cynthia roberts is daring and subversive . roberts is not afraid to plunge the otherwise straight-ahead and simple narrative into extended and extremely avant-garde montage sequences . the love scenes between the women are especially beautiful . the musical score by nicholas stirling blends cool jazz and lounge stylings , while the skilful cinematography by harald bachmann terrifically captures a blend of garish 70's porn and psychedelia . amazingly , this film appears to have received a good deal of its funding from a variety of canadian government cultural agencies . this speaks volumes towards the importance of state funding for culture , as one cannot imagine such an entertaining , original and vital film being made in a traditional setting where conformity and formula rule the day . bubbles galore seems to be making the film festival rounds and does not , at present , appear to have any traditional distribution in place , so keep your eye on the alternative film listings for this one . it's funny , sexy and subversive . and it shouldn't be missed .

steven spielberg is now considered as one of the hollywood deities , because of the rare capability to deliver both huge commercial hits , like jurassic park , and " oscar " -awarded critical triumphs like schindler's list . however , in the 1970s spielberg built his reputation by creating works of art that could slip in both categories . one of them is close encounters of the third kind , extremely popular and influential science-fiction spectacle . unfortunately , it had a bad luck to be released in the same year as star wars . although both films have a lot in common ( ground-breaking special effects , brilliant score by john williams ) their future was different ; one became an unstoppable cult phenomenon , and another almost forgotten and stuck forever in its shadow . when spielberg began work on that project , he was already established as a bright new hollywood star due to his previous commercial hit , jaws . together with other young directors of his " new hollywood " generation , like kauffman , carpenter , hill and millius , he exploited the great creative freedom of 1970s , when even the mainstream producers dared to experiment . ironically , it was spielberg himself whose later commercial success would established new unwritten rules of " blockubuster " philosophy . but in the mid 1970s , many things were different ; spielberg was young and eager to use hollywood resources for his very personal and artistic movie . although very personal , spielberg's screenplay was partly based on the book " ufo experience " by dr . j . allen hynek and in many ways inspired by the popular urban mythology of extraterrestrial visitors to earth that began to grow in the world after ww2 . spielberg was not only inspired by the mythology , but his movie also gave the mythology itself a huge boost , unmatched until the contemporary era of x-files and the roswell anniversary . that was partly because he made the movie very realistic using the authentic ufo-related incidents as the element of the plot . the story begins with one of such incidents - team of international scientists come to the sonorra desert in mexico to find the u . s . navy planes of who went missing decades ago during the famous flight 19 . such events coincide with the ufo incident witnessed by roy neary ( richard dreyfuss ) , power company worker from muncie , indiana , who later becomes obsessed with his experience . because of his obsession he loses his job , family and sanity , but his loss is nothing compared to the experience of jillian guiler ( melinda dillon ) , single mother whose son becomes the victim of alien abduction . in the meantime , the scientists decipher the strange signals from outer space and u . s . government , in co-operation with the french , led by lacombe ( francois truffaut ) begin with the preparation for ultra-secret project . when the news of the poison gas leak in the middle of wyoming reach neary , he finally sees some sense in all his visions and begins the perilous journey toward the centre of endangered area . there he is joined by jillian who shared the similar visions . two of them must break through military pickets and reach their destination to find whatever is there . spielberg here shows great mastery by using the very same techniques of jaws to make completely different effects . the slow , gradual yet very disciplined series of dramatic incidents - " close encounters " - is set in order to bring the viewer to the great revelation in the finale . but , instead of the fear and horror we had to endure during the jaws , we are now overwhelmed by the sense of boyish wonder . throughout the movie the viewer knows that something big , magnificent and wonderful is about to happen , and great magician spielberg delivers his promise in the end . the last sequence , with its , even in this age , impressive special effects by the great virtuoso douglas trumbull , would leave many mouths open . one of the great virtues of this film is its optimism . aliens , who almost always get portrayed as the monsters in science-fiction cinema , are here benevolent and harmless creatures and the first contact between them and humanity is a beginning of something wonderful . it is very ironic , when we consider that the two classic sf movies that visually inspired spielberg actually told quite different story - howard hawks' thing and byron haskin's war of the worlds presented extraterrestrials as the threat to the mankind . spielberg's humane approach and faith in the future also lies in great contrast to the pessimistic mood of its era ; the only hint of the contemporary gloom is post-watergate portrayal of government as conspiratorial towards the public . but , even such government is much more harmless compared to the murderous and chain-smoking men in black that became the stereotype thanks to x-files and its more cynical and disturbing visions . there lies the main , and probably the only flaw of this great picture - lack of conflict , and consequently , lack of drama . the movie has few excitements or even action scenes ( especially the last that may be an interesting homage to hitchcock's north by northwest ) but generally , almost everyone - neary , jillian , government , aliens - are the good guys . despite such shortcomings , the actors were good and manage to bring multidimensionality to their simple roles . richard dreyfuss is very convincing as a ordinary , yet nice guy , who sinks into insanity only to rediscover himself in a grand finale . melinda dillon was , on the other hand , nominated for " oscar " as a struggling mother , yet she was overshadowed by teri garr as neary's long-suffering wife ronnie . apart from visual wonders of this film , spielberg's semi-official composer john williams again excels by his beautiful music , this time using the simple melody both as the element of a plot , and as the basis for his score . the aliens , who are the main subject of this film , were visually very convincing . too convincing , one of my acquaintances in the ufo-researching circles said . according to him , the depiction of extraterrestrials as grey-skinned little people with big eyes was so accurate , that it managed to freak out powerful government figures interested in suppressing the truth about ufos . so , they later approached spielberg and ordered him to make another movie with alien , this time designed to be anything but the real life . the result was e . t . , for many years the biggest commercial hit of all times , yet less inspirational for ufo enthusiasts . anyway , whether the viewer believes in existence of extraterrestrials or ufos , close encounters of the third kind remains the great movie , and one of the rare uplifting experiences in modern cinema .

the formula is simple . trap a varied group of people on an isolated location , then pop in a seemingly unstoppable monster to kill them one by one . these have been the successful ingredients for many good films ( the thing , alien , aliens , and tremors to name a few ) . so , why is it that so many films following this recipe end up pathetically bad ? ( see the relic for a particularly putrid example . ) perhaps it is simply too easy to forget the necessary binding ingredient : effort and ideas . deep rising meets these two requirements part way , but not enough to salvage the film . treat williams is finnegan , the leader of a small boat crew who hire out their services ( and their boat ) for any activity . . . no questions asked . this time , however , they may have gone too far . their passengers , led by the ominous wes studi , are the type of multi-national terrorist squads usually only seen in die hard films . and their cargo . . . let's just say it has very high explosive potential . what is the target of these thieves ? why , the argonauticus , of course , a high tech luxury cruise yacht on its maiden voyage . but something else is hunting the argonauticus . . . something ancient and deadly . by the time the thieves arrive , nearly everyone on board the ship has been killed . and now the creature senses fresh meat ! so , you have the thieves and their mercenary boat crew , joining forces with the surviving passengers ( including the ship owner canton ( anthony heald ) , and a thief with less lofty goals , trillian ( famke janssen ) ) against the terror from the deep . and the monster gets to pick them off one by one . fortunately for the creature , this particular band of criminals happens to be the dumbest the world can offer . why else would they indulge in petty squabbling while they watch their friends become fish food . if there's a more clarion call for unity , i don't know what it might be . it's pretty easy to guess who will get killed off when . there are no surprises in that the most interesting characters seem to last until the end . for the most part , the watery tentacles seem to be acting on the audience's impulses to get rid of the most boring characters first . ( although i wonder if the filmmakers might have extended djimon hounsou's life a bit if they knew this would be released so soon after his acclaim for amistad . ) treat williams is a passable hero , and famke janssen does her best julia roberts impersonation . but while wes studi and anthony heald are particularly slimy , very little of the rest of the company stand out in any way . the biggest treat in the film , however , has to be pantucci , kevin j . o'connor's whining engine-boy , under finnegan's employ . his constant quips may be a bit over-written , but they manage to capture the same vein of nerve-addled humor that bill paxton delivered as hudson in aliens ( or todd graff as hippie in the abyss , for that matter ) . it's just a stock part ( the comic-relief character ) , but it almost makes this tired alien clone bearable . as far as the monster goes , although the cgi is done well , the creature has no logical consistency . think back to the great ( or even just good ) movie monsters . they all had a set of " rules " about what they could do , and how and why they would do it . part of the joy of those films was slowly discovering , along with the heroes , just what those rules are . the tentacle monster in deep rising doesn't have a set of rules . . . or if it does , not a very good one . it merely eats ( or drinks , as the case may be ) , and there is no rhyme or reason for what it does in order to do so . the film never explains why the argonauticus is attacked in the first place . it simply happens . the action scenes are decent , but few are noteworthy . the film definitely does suffer from its proximity to titanic . deep rising's peril in the water scenes pale next to cameron's ( but can you really blame them ) . unfortunately , deep rising's efforts are more on par with speed 2 . on the plus side , however , the film's closing image shows some promise for a potentially interesting ( but unlikely ) sequel . perhaps you'd be better off waiting for that one .

" my name is jack carter , and you don't want to know me " says our brooding anti-hero ( sylvester stallone ) . take his advice ! to know this guy is as rewarding as being thrown over a terrace . and to watch this film is almost as painful . " get carter " is a gloomy looking , unimaginative film that offers no joy . jack carter is as tough as tough guys come . he works out of vegas as a self-described 'financial adjuster' . explaining his duties , he says , " people make promises and break them . i help them remember . " he has a chiseled body full of tattoos . he has the weathered look indicative of a man who has seen his share of hard times . he speaks in a hushed but menacing tone of voice . in other words , this is sylvester stallone acting like . . . sylvester stallone . and like most of his previous roles , his character is a shallow , one-dimensional thug whose modus operandi is to talk tough , hassle a few hapless people , find out what he needs to know , and then dispense his own kind of justice . with the charisma of a pit bull , being tough is all that jack carter knows . yet , even tough guys know when to put family first . as the story begins , we learn that jack's little brother has died in a car accident . the police attribute it to heavy drinking . however , jack is suspicious , believing that he was 'taken out' . he takes a break from his vegas duties and tries to see if he can find the truth . as he pokes around , he runs into several lowlife characters . they include a shady business partner , a prostitute , a dweebish millionaire molded after bill gates , and an oily owner of a porn website . any one of them may know something about his brother's death . all of them have the means of carrying out the deed . but don't expect an exercise in sleuthing where well-placed clues lead carter to the truth . he's all brawn and no brains , so there are no epiphanies during his investigation . instead , he uses intimidation to muscle his way forward , cycling through this circle of suspects . flustered with his lack of progress , he cycles through them again and again . this all gets tiring fairly quickly . by the time the film launches into its final act , we're numb from its pedestrian pace . oddly , as a tough-guy thriller , it starves us for action . admittedly , there is one nifty chase sequence , but this is related to a tangential and needless plot ( carter's vegas ties send thugs to retrieve him ) . the story also fails to generate any kind of emotion . stallone has the personality of a slab of stone . and the look and feel of the film is perpetually downcast . the weather is constantly overcast or rainy . meanwhile , most shots take place at night , in dimly lit rooms , or in dark alleys . it's just impossible to get stirred about that kind of atmosphere . as a result , " get carter " amounts to nothing more than a flat thriller , bereft of clever moments and devoid of any excitement . you're better off leaving this guy alone .

while watching loser , it occurred to me that amy heckerling's true genius as a film-maker is casting . in fast times at ridgemont high , she gave us sean penn's jeff spicoli ; in look who's talking , she turned bruce willis into a wise-cracking baby and provided john travolta with is first career revival ; in clueless , she found a star vehicle for the adorableness that is ( or was ) alicia silverstone . she seems to understand instinctively how to find performers the audience will like in spite of their flaws . unfortunately , she may also be starting to understand that she understands . giving appealing actors an appealing script creates likeable movies . giving appealing actors a script in which their appeal _is_ the movie makes for unexpectedly awful films like loser . naturally , heckerling makes her protagonist an all-around swell guy . paul tannek ( jason biggs ) is a small-town boy who gets a scholarship to nyu , then instantly finds himself an island of compassion and diligence in the cold-hearted big city . paul is the kind of guy who gives up his seat on the subway to an elderly woman ; his roommates adam ( zak orth ) , chris ( tom sadoski ) and noah ( jimmi simpson ) are the kind of guys who blast their music and let their waterbeds leak all over paul . paul is also the kind of guy who adores girls from afar , in this case the lovely dora diamond ( mena suvari ) . dora has problems of her own , including a shortage of funds to pay her tuition and a relationship with a professor , edward alcott ( greg kinnear ) , that's more than slightly one-sided . they're two conscientious kids who love animals and homeless people , so clearly they belong together , even if paul is a loser . i must confess that , for a while , i was suckered in by heckerling's casting . jason biggs is an engaging performer whose unconventional looks make him even easier to embrace ; suvari is a coquette with an undercurrent of intelligence . they're pleasant enough to watch , and heckerling gives us plenty of scenes establishing how nice they are and how nice their respective antagonists aren't . then it gradually becomes clear that there's virtually nothing to loser but scenes of that sort . in theory , loser is a romantic comedy , but there is scarcely a laugh to be found in the entire film ( notable exception : a cameo by a scene-stealing comic actor as a video store clerk ) . instead of taking any time to make the characters' situations funny , heckerling spends 98 minutes making her characters' situations pathetic . she shows none of the ear for quirky dialogue that sparked clueless , nor any of that film's interest in lively plotting ( not surprisingly , since clueless's plot came via jane austen's emma ) . she simply turns the film into a pity party . since loser is a film composed almost entirely of establishing character , you might think that those characters would be interesting , or at least slightly complicated . instead , you have people either so perfect or so unredeemable that there's no reason to watch them . paul isn't just a nice guy , he's flawless ; consequently , he's a central character who does absolutely no growing . his roommates aren't just inconsiderate , they're actively evil-blackmailing professor alcott , drugging women with rohypnol and generally giving humanity a bad name . and professor alcott isn't just manipulative , he turns dora into his house slave . dora's unthinking devotion to alcott is the only whiff of basic human frailty to be found in loser , and even that isn't explored in sufficient detail . there's more ambiguity in the 30-second snippet from alan cumming's broadway performance as the emcee in cabaret then there is in the rest of loser it's one thing to turn supporting characters into comic exaggerations ; it's another to flatten your leads into easily digestible mush . and it would help if those comic exaggerations were somehow . . . i don't know . . . comic . still , i spent much of the film holding out the ridiculous hope that heckerling would somehow salvage loser from its tedium and justify my desire to like paul and dora . that hope dissolved the moment heckerling underscored a sequence of paul in the throes of unrequited love to simon and garfunkel's " scarborough fair/canticle . " instead of giving the sequence a knowing wink-a reference to the graduate , a hint that paul is becoming an overly-sensitive clich-heckerling plays it deadly straight . even in the scenes that scream for a light comic touch and a bit of a poke at her protagonist's foibles , she finds it impossible to stray from the gospel of paul as saint . clueless's cher had her self-absorption and manipulative tendencies to balance her cuteness . in loser , amy heckerling shows a leaden hand with material that demands friskiness ( her one show of wit involves naming paul's dorm " hunt's hall " after erstwhile bowery boy huntz hall ) . her gift with casting proved to be her curse . loser may be a crashing bore , but gee , aren't those two kids swell ?

the most amazing thing about paul cox's innocence is how unlike a movie it is . i mean that as the highest compliment . if most studios were to profile an elderly couple who rekindle a 40-year-old romance , i'd want to run and hide . the sex scenes would be handled as a farce , producers would shed 20 years off the characters' ages ( so susan sarandon and harrison ford could star ) and true love would shine through any obstacle without explanation and consequence . along with a charming romantic story , the australian/belgian innocence shows how an increasing sense of mortality combined with revisiting the past while being entrenched in the present can make something that seems so right seem downright questionable . the romance gets started when former musician andreas ( charles " bud " tingwell ) , learns that his true love , claire ( julia blake ) , lives nearby . they decide to catch up on old times , but soon find themselves in a reinvigorating affair . complicating matters is andreas' frail health , and claire's longtime husband ( terry norris ) , who can't understand why he's suddenly become obsolete . in my mind , the movie is less about the relationship between andreas and claire , than the feelings of everyone involved . john , claire's husband , endlessly questions what he did wrong . claire initially insists she's a grown-up , but admittedly behaves like a child , a prospect that thrills and disappoints her . andreas , an agnostic , begins to question his fate , a message cox delivers in a memorable dream sequence . cox litters the movie with flashbacks , including the repeated vision of a roaring train . it's a reminder of andreas and claire's past love ( as young lovers , they met by train ) , but as it recurs , we get the feeling that the past and the present have clashed . a pall is cast on the whole affair . a master of the understated , cox strings together a series of memorable moments . in andreas' dream sequence , amidst the roar of the train and conversations , we get the whole picture of andreas and claire's love . we also get glimpses into john and claire's relationship . during a silent candlelit dinner shortly afterward , claire admits to john about her indiscretion , telling more than any monologue could . all that's heard is the scraping of forks against plates . the characters are unlike anything i've seen -- they're people . so many times , movies and especially television portray senior citizens as gratingly spunky . or they're reduced to comedic buffoons . ordinary people with a pile of emotions , claire and andreas aren't sure what the next step is . they do want to be happy , which consists of an entirely different set of conditions than what they've known throughout their adult lives . bravo to cox , who wrote the script , for not making john a monster , so that claire's affair is automatically justified . norris is so effective as john that he makes andreas and claire's love difficult to accept . we feel for him . he's a decent man . sure , he may have become complacent , but he never expected this , especially now . with so much presented to the audience , it's only expected that the material gets a little drawn out and repetitive , which it does . however , in bringing up tough questions and not offering easy answers , cox displays a skill and ? lan isn't likely to be surpassed by anyone anytime soon .

billy bob thornton , who had a sudden rise to fame with 1996's sling blade after spending years as a virtually unknown actor and writer , is becoming one of the most versatile - and most accomplished - american actors around at the moment . as jacob , the simple but at times very bright loser brother of bill paxton's hank , thornton gives a performance which should leave an indelible mark on all but the most hardened viewers . three men , hank ( paxton ) , jacob ( thornton ) and their friend lou ( brent briscoe ) stumble upon a plane wreck which , upon closer inspection , yields a rotting corpse and a bag full of money . jacob and lou want to pocket the cash . hank , the smarter - and perhaps more naive - of the three , insists on leaving the money for the authorities to find . eventually , they agree to keep the cash safe until the plane is found , and then split the money three ways . things start going wrong , though , with greed and violence weaving their ways through their plan . disaster is sure to strike . director sam raimi , of the evil dead and darkman fame , has made an excellent and thought-provoking film , worlds away from the comic horror films which made his name . while there are a couple of moments which might remind one of his earlier work , raimi has made an intelligent and mature departure which will hopefully be a sign of even greater films to come . scott b . smith's screenplay , based on his novel ( which i haven't read ) is a fine example of escalating tension . while it does remind one of danny boyle's shallow grave without the abundance of black humour , it keeps the drama that should really be a part of such a story on morality , or the lack thereof , found in a film with this subject matter . alar kivilo's cinematography reminds one of joel and ethan coen's fargo , with the bleak , snowy landscape almost becoming another character . danny elfman also does well with his moody , finely-written score . if there's a flaw in the film , it's that it goes on for just a little too long . just when we think that they are about to wrap things up , raimi and smith decide to let the film go on a little further . while this isn't really a bad thing , it did become a little frustrating at times ( this may have been due to the fact that i had consumed a large sprite beforehand ) . the performances are excellent , with the usually annoying paxton in fine form and bridget fonda giving a scene-stealing turn as hank's scheming wife . this is an excellent showcase for thornton's fine skills as an actor and a great change in direction for raimi , who could very well have a career ahead of him as an accomplished director of dramatic films . fingers crossed , though , that this doesn't stop him from making another evil dead sequel .

capsule : the running gag pair of characters from all of kevin smith's films gets their own movie . the gags are sporadically funny . it is more than occasionally funny for teens who are fond of scatological humor and anti-gay jokes . the plot is weak and the leads are not a particularly funny comic team . the little inside jokes and digs at other entertainment and particularly at kevin smith films are the best features of the film . sadly for me they were just not funny enough to make the film worth watching . this feels like the high school skit that that the principal would not let the kids do on talent night . ( and it turns out he had very good reasons . ) , low 0 ( -4 to +4 ) a film needs a plot . it needs characters for empathy value . it needs a story and an emotional center . if a film is just a chain of jokes it can only be so good and any entertainment value will succeed or fail based on how funny the jokes are . kevin smith has now made two satisfying films , clerks and chasing amy . with dogma he tried to make a philosophical religious comedy and mixed with a madcap romp . peter cook and dudley moore did that very successfully with their bedazzled . but getting the combination to work is very hard to do right and kevin smith's fecal monsters in dogma were not the way to do it . his remaining two films , mallrats and his new jay and silent bob strike back are aimed squarely at a teenage audience . jay and silent bob strike back is a compendium of gay jokes , penis jokes , flatulence jokes , film pastiches , and in-jokes . how funny the jokes are will be a subjective call . for me , the vast majority of the jokes were just not very funny . there was not enough cleverness or variety . it is funny at most once or twice to accuse someone of being gay . penis jokes work only so many times . showing up as minor characters in every kevin smith film jay and silent bob were a clever pair of human running gags . they were sort of the modern equivalents of naunton wayne and basil radford , the comic duo who showed up satirizing the english middle class in several good british post-war films including dead of night , the lady vanishes , and passport to pimlico . jay and silent bob were originally supposedly typical generation x stoners . as the series wore on they had larger and larger parts . in jay and silent bob strike back they are the leads . jay and silent bob ( played by jason mewes and kevin smith ) are chased away from the front of the convenience store where they were dealing drugs in clerks . this leaves them at loose ends . they are not sure what would be worthwhile to do with their lives when they hear that a comic book with characters visually modeled on them will be adapted into a movie . they decide to devote their lives to wrecking the movie or getting some of that big movie industry cash . so it is off to hollywood to shake down the movie company and having adventures along the way . the film is mostly about their adventures on the road and when they get to hollywood the problem with this comedy team is that neither really pulls his weight to make the film funny . silent bob , being silent , can only contribute to the comedy by reacting with that very expressive face of his . this makes his piece of the comedy even less than a straight man like a dean martin or bud abbott would have . jay has to be the comic . he could carry the load for both if he were extremely inventive . the problem is that he is not sufficiently funny . he is too bland to be the comic half and his lines just do not show any comic flair . so jay and silent bob are a long way from being a successful comic team . their starring roles and the low humor make this a comedy for those young at mind and for people who can laugh at gags they have seen before--sometimes just minutes before . like dogma before it , but definitely not like chasing amy , this film feels more like an amateurish skit than a real movie . certainly neither the plot nor the characters are at all involving . they are excuses for gags , many of which still fall flat . it is dogma without any of the humorous theological content . the film does not offer much to an adult audience . i rate it 4 on the 0 to 10 scale and a low 0 on the -4 to +4 scale .

starring shawnee smith ; donovan leitch ; ricky paull goldin ; kevin dillon & billy beck the blob is the remake of the 1960's classic ( a term that i use very loosely to define the original ) about a really mean glob of goop that takes out anything that gets in its way . now the original version has the virtue of cheesy special effects which give it a kind of nostalgic campy feel . the fact that steve mcqueen was the star of the film doesn't exactly hurt it either . fast forward to the late '80's . steve mcqueen isn't in the remake ( this might have something to do with the fact that he had been pushing up daisies for years ) . nor is there any hollywood heavy hitters in the lead role . that is unless you count matt dillon's brother kevin as a hollywood heavy hitter . the other thing that works against this new blob is that special effects technology has improved dramatically since the original . the only things you need now to have great special effects in a movie are deep pockets . it looks as if the produces of the new blob had a couple of holes in their pockets . the special effects in this movie are cheesy , like the original's . unlike the original , they don't look campy , they just look cheap . one bright spot in the movie from a purely sexist point of view is shawnee smith . she is very attractive and can actually act , which is more than i can say about some of her costars . in terms of plot , a little ball of pink goop falls from the sky . seems this goop was an experiment that was being housed up on a satellite . anyway , the pink stuff has a taste for humans . the more people it absorbs , the bigger it gets . and it isn't the friendliest goop on the block either . anyway , it attacks this little town and it's up to the attractive local teenage population to stop it . not really , but that is how it seems . this version attempts to recapture the camp of the original . as i've already said , this new version of the blob comes off more as cheap , badly acted , and badly written than campy . in the years since this film was made none of the cast have gone on to greatness . although , star shawnee smith had a very tiny role in armageddon . the reason that we have never heard of any of them again is quite simple -- they all stunk out loud . although some of the film's smaller roles are filled with some actors that , while not big stars , are doubtless people that you will recognize from their supporting roles in other movies and tv shows . it also appears that the producers of the blob tried to compensate for the lack of a special effects budget by making the scenes in which the blob makes meals of the townsfolk as gory as possible . sadly , it doesn't work very well . if you want to see a big ball of goop terrorize a town , then i would say that you should skip the remake and rent the original . ( although that isn't so hot either . ) this newest version is seriously lacking in any redeeming qualities .

in my reviews i try to make gentle recommendations rather than telling you what to see or what not to see . i realize that we all have different tastes and i cannot predict what my audience will like and what they will dislike . but in the case of american beauty , i must make an exception . if you haven't yet seen it , go see it . now . stop reading this review and head for your local multiplex , then after you've seen it , come back . i'll wait here . welcome back . if you followed my advice ( and i see no reason why you should not have , do you ? ) , i'm sure you've just had one of the richest cinematic experiences of your life . american beauty is an extraordinary film , a powerful , jolting exploration of the dark side of the american dream . it's humorous but it isn't funny because of the unrelenting ominous undercurrent that runs throughout the whole production . mixing comedy and the darkest of drama was the way this film was intended , and by god , it works , making it one of the year's very best . lester burnham ( kevin spacey ) has entered the mother of all mid-life crises . he is living life without a purpose . he is bored , depressed and sick of his sheltered , insignificant existence . he barely ever talks to his family , has no sex life , is stuck at a dead-end job and thinks he has no reason to live . but one day , when he and his equally troubled wife ( annette bening ) attend one of his daughter's ( thora birch ) cheerleading performances , he sees something that makes him come alive . what he sees is the performance by his daughter's friend , the head cheerleader . he develops a lust for the promiscuous young girl ; an obsession which soon becomes pedophilic in nature . but for the first time , lester feels that he is actually living . this crush is only the beginning . lester proceeds to make more and more radical changes in his life , buying the car of his dreams , cursing off the boss and quitting his job ( " today i quit my job , told the boss to f * * * himself and blackmailed him for $60 , 000 -- would you pass the asparagus please ? " ) , buying drugs from the voyeur-next-door ( ricky fitts , a teenager who mysteriously videotapes what he considers to be " beauty " ) and refusing to be docile in family affairs . his new attitude further alienates his daughter , only reassuring her that her parents are nothing more than freaks of nature unjustly forced on her by the powers that be , and inspiring her to enter a relationship with her eccentric neighbor . and the burnhams's neighbors provide american beauty with a significant chunk of its dramatic momentum . ricky fitts ( wes bentley ) serves as the film's thematic center , providing the obscure , powerful meaning of the title . colonel fitts , the father , is one of the most fascinating and complex characters in the movie , even considering his limited screentime . kevin spacey has never been better , and this performance will certainly earn him a chance to put a little gold person on his mantel . he never plays his droll character as a freak , rather , he effectively portrays him as a normal person led to drastic self-exploration by his dissatisfaction with life . spacey is poignant and devastating in the role of a lifetime . equally astonishing is young thora birch , who plays her potentially stereotypical rebellious teen character with suprising feeling and tenderness . at two hours and ten minutes , american beauty didn't feel nearly long enough . it's a complicated , unforgettable film that , like the ice storm two years ago , dares to explore the darkest reaches of suburban life . powerfully and cynically , it dissects the notion of the pretty house with the white picket fence and appealing garden being the american dream . it claims that this picture-perfect image is just that -- an image , and hiding behind it are lives much darker than common knowledge would have it . the dark , deeply ironic ending , though given away by our narrator in the first few minutes of the movie , stays with you for weeks after it's all over . american beauty is just the kind of uncompromising film hollywood needs every now and then to counterbalance the mindless drivel we see released ; even more so considering it's a masterpiece .

there have been merchant-ivory costume dramas with more of a pulse than " the mod squad , " a self-consciously " hip " cinematic rendering of the old tv series still looked upon fondly by so many baby-boomers . well , said " squad " certainly won't be a pleasant viewing experience for them or anybody else , maybe even the teen target audience the movie has been geared towards . a contemporary take on this decidedly '70s show doesn't exactly seem unwarranted , but one wonders if the mold it accumulated while waiting on the shelf didn't transform into a full-blown case of botulism . how curious that the film begins by defining both mod and squad , insisting that the latter is a group of people working together and then contradicting this definition by keeping its titular trio apart for a sizeable chunk of the running time . they are julie , pete and linc , reformed delinquents working undercover for the lapd ( exposition put out of the way so fast that you're likely to be lost from the opening moments on ) , and they are respectively played by claire danes , giovanni ribisi and omar epps , talented actors each deserving of better than this . their plight involves standard cop-corruption stuff , as our would-be protagonists catch wind of an internal cover-up after their superior ( reliable dennis farina , one of the best things here and gone so quickly ) gets killed and framed for drug trafficking . they pout a lot and eventually get cracking to expose this convoluted conspiracy using surveillance tactics that would impress the hardy boys and linda tripp but few others . when you're supposed to be asking , " what's going to happen next ? " , you'll instead entertain thoughts like " who are these people and why should i care ? " or " aren't thrillers supposed to contain thrills ? " not that danes , epps and ribisi don't give it a shot . danes can do the troubled teen thing in her sleep , as evidenced by " my so-called life , " but she's saddled with a mysterious-boyfriend ( josh brolin ) subplot so see-through you begin to seriously question her so-called intelligence . ditto for ribisi's ( " saving private ryan " ) looney loose cannon , though at least he performs with a wild-and-crazy vigor that occasionally demands attention . but epps - poor epps . epps ( " higher learning " ) is so short-changed he's reduced to literally waiting around for a bad guy to chase him . all this sloppiness can be attributed to the screenwriters , one of whom , scott silver , is also the director . they must think that if they dress up their stupid story in such spiffy trappings ( the look of the film is really quite impressive ) , it'll somehow pay off , but this " mod squad " plods anyway . characters are non-existent ; present are just some good-looking young things modeling cool levis and cooler attitudes . plot hardly escapes confusing convention . and the one genre element you'd think would be show up in generous portions - a few nifty explosions , some fights , any kind of action whatsoever - only rarely makes it to this dull gabfest . all those quick to put down last month's inept but serviceable " my favorite martian " update need to take a step back . here's a small-to-big-screen translation that really should've stayed in its former incarnation , " mod " or not .

i think maybe it's time for the batman series to be put to rest . not only has the first two films' unsettling insight into what it would really take for someone to make himself into a " superhero " been abandoned , but this one throws any lingering realism out the window and goes for all-out camp with few traces of the self-mocking restraint of the relatively light-hearted third installment . let me give you an example : in the first scene of the movie , batman ( george clooney ) and robin ( chris o'donnell ) are summoned to a museum that has been literally turned to ice by mr . freeze ( arnold schwarzenegger ) in an attempt to steal a diamond . mr . freeze's thugs are armed with none other than hockey sticks , but this is no problem for our heroes : automatic skates shoot out of their shoes , at which point robin manages to get hold of a hockey stick , grabs the diamond , and stick-handles it through the museum . i might have expected this from an airplane-style farce , but i don't think that's what this movie is supposed to be . after all , the previous three batman movies were actually fairly realistic by the standards of the superhero/action genre and kept the corny death-defying stunts to a minimum , while playing the obligatory cheesiness with at least some amount of irony . not any more ; the list goes on and on in this one . robin holds onto the outside of a flying rocket ship 30 , 000 feet high in the atmosphere , climbing in the door to save batman . mr . freeze and poison ivy ( uma thurman ) leap from a skyscraper and survive by landing in a small pond . a world dominating mad scientist lives in a fortress that seems to have been stolen from the old he-man cartoons . my very favorite example is the scene in which batgirl ( alicia silverstone ) gets in a race with motorcycle thugs , during which they come up with the clever notion of dousing the road with gasoline and setting it on fire to distract her . not bad , but wouldn't the police ( or maybe batman ? ) notice if the road was on fire ? i knew gotham city was this crazy anarchic place , but . . . . it also seems that the creators of the batman movies are obeying some unwritten rule that there have to be more main characters and plot lines in each successive installment . as if three protagonists and two villains weren't enough , batman and robin further weighs itself down with an underdeveloped side story of the failing health of bruce wayne's butler alfred ( michael gough ) , which might have seemed poignant if it wasn't surrounded by so much silliness , as well as several scenes with elle macpherson as bruce's girlfriend which serve no purpose other than to remind us that she is in the movie . all this might be semi-excusable if the story were interesting and entertaining , but it isn't . in fact , it's kind of boring . mr . freeze and poison ivy pale in comparison as villains to past baddies such as jack nicholson's joker and danny devito's penguin . their evil plot is as predictable ( schwarzenegger actually pronounces the words , " today gotham city , tomorrow the world ! " ) as it is lame-brained ( didn't it ever occur to poison ivy that freezing the entire world would kill her precious plants too ? ) . and robin's constant challenging of batman mostly just makes him look bull-headed and stupid and makes us wonder why batman ever would have taken him on as a partner in the first place . strip away the stars , the fancy set design , and the status as a " batman movie , " and all you have here is another barely passable summer action flick .

young einstein is embarrassingly lame , but that didn't stop it from becoming a phenomenon in australia , where it became the third largest box office hit of all time . in the u . s . , warner brothers is hoping the movie will follow in the footsteps of paul hogan , inxs , and shrimp on the barby to become the latest rage from down under . personally , i'm hoping americans everywhere will rise to the occasion and make young einstein a box office bomb . young einstein sprang from the twisted mind of yahoo serious , who not only wrote , produced , edited , and directed the film , but also starred and did his own stunts . his creation is about as stupid and contrived as you'd expect from someone named yahoo . the movie takes substantial historical liberties in recreating einstein's youth . whereas the scientist actually hailed from germany , the film finds him still living with his parents on tasmania , a remote australian island . in addition to deriving the formula for energy and the theory of relativity , albert invents surfing , bubbles in beer , and the electric guitar . yahoo plays einstein as a naive and unrefined country hick--a clown with an insatiable curiosity . although yahoo's performance is at first endearing , the one-dimensional characterization loses its novelty faster than you can say e=mc2 . yahoo has created a charming family for albert , and the scenes on tasmania are often clever . but after the first twenty minutes , the movie quickly plummets and degenerates into a poor excuse for a comedy . young einstein is hampered by its lethargic pace and inane plot . yahoo must be an mtv addict because his movie features an omnipresent soundtrack ; unfortunately , the music is altogether gratuitous and quickly becomes overbearing . almost every other scene includes a blaring rock song that leaves you wondering whether you are watching a movie or a music video . the instrumental score , on the other hand , is generally playful ; yahoo uses such classics as the " 1812 overture " and the theme from the good , the bad and the ugly to great comic effect . halfway through young einstein , i knew for sure the movie was a stinker . but it wasn't until the very end that i finally put my finger on why : the comedy takes its roots not from whimsical film fantasies ( such as young sherlock holmes ) but from cheesy prime-time sitcoms . in fact , young einstein might have been more at home on network television , where its sophomoric humor wouldn't raise any eyebrows .

the central focus of michael winterbottom's " welcome to sarajevo " is sarajevo itself , the city under siege , and its different effect on the characters unfortunate enough to be stuck there . it proves the backdrop for a stunningly realized story which refreshingly strays from mythic portents ( " platoon " ) , racial tumultuosness ( the risible " the walking dead " ) or a tinge of schmaltziness ( " schindler's list " ) . the two leads , stephen dillane as a reporter and emira nusevic as an orphan with a plight few can identify with , are extremely believable ; not one moment with them involved rings false . the question is not what went right . the question is what went wrong . for one , the film fails to provide a political overview of the war as it progresses ( the dillane characters reports an american plane departing from sarajevo as it departs , and that's about it . ) . the assortment of high-profile supporting actors , ranging from woody harrelson as a yankee reporter " into " liquor and cigarrettes to marisa tomei as a huggable children's aid or somesuch are incapable of rising above the sketchiness of their characters , albeit they strive . the interrupted use of authentic war footage somewhat hampers the rest of the film , it makes the fictional characters seem powerless by comparison . still , winterbottom eschews mawkishness through flashy , frantic editing and imaginative use of music . and it's a plus , because he doesn't toy with our emotions with sentimental blandness . he wants us to know that in war , no one is victorious . the sweet hereafter starring ian holm , sarah polley , bruce greenwood , tom mccamus , gabrielle rose , arsinee khanjian , alberta watson , maury chaykin , caerthan banks . produced by atom egoyan and camelia frieberg . script by atom egoyan ( based on the novel by russell banks ) . directed by atom egoyan . running time : 110 mins . rated r . __________________________________________________________ atom egoyan's powerfully meditative " the sweet hereafter " is as anything as haunting and transcendental as i've seen this year . it not only explores the aftermaths of a terrible tragedy with magnificent subtlety , with cold , and stunning shots of the backdrop of this mistfortune but also by telegraphing the sense of devastation that has permeated the small town with an enormous amount of dignity and respect for each and every soul affected . ian holm as the somber , lonely lawyer seeking compensation for the townspeople , has a decency and a restraint uncommon with lawyers , he's a lion for the wrong reasons : the pain for having lost his daughter ( she's a druggie who frequently calls him begging for money ) is reflected on the town . and in some mesmerizing flashbacks , we witness how she lost her purity . it's one of the most strikingly breathtaking takes on the loss of innocence i've ever seen . but the most astounding part goes to sarah polly , the peaceful , benevolent girl who , in contrast to the other characters , remains the most mentally stable during past , present or future . her ability to convey concealed pain and unconditional love is the opposite , yet near-revolutionary role that won emily watson an oscar nomination for " breaking the waves " . both women are torn apart by an extraordinary incident but it is only then that we truly see , truly feel , their wordless , omnipotent love . " the sweet hereafter " though , is atom egoyan's movie and as of now , he is emerging as the definite face of independent cinema . after surging to worldwide recognition with 1994's " exotica " , " the sweet hereafter " makes him something few people in this industry can call themselves : an artist . he interweaves time with a delicacy and sees a soul with a purity that is just not common .

my inner flag was at half-mast last year when nick at nite pulled " dragnet " reruns off the air . sure , i'd seen them all at least once , but i could always count on at least a few inadvertent laughs from ultra-serious jack webb when there was nothing else on tv . even though " dragnet " is out of circulation at the moment , we webb anti-fans still have the d . i . , a 50's propaganda piece for the military that is almost as hilarious as the famous " blue boy " episode of " dragnet . " for anyone like me who got laughs out of webb's rapid-fire speeches and straight-faced seriousness , think of the d . i . as what would happen if sgt . joe friday ever enlisted , because he plays exactly the same character here , a no-nonsense old fart who looks with disdain at the younger generation and loves to give long- winded , melodramatic speeches on any topic . in this election year , i'm more convinced than ever that webb and bob dole were separated at birth . the movie opens in characteristic fashion as one recruit after another knocks on webb's office door and enters . he gives each one a different series of cranky criticisms before the credits come up . the " produced and directed by jack webb " card pretty much goes without saying . this is his movie all the way , and after the first twenty minutes of him chewing out his recruits for no reason , i was wondering if there would even be a plot . i certainly would have been entertained by an hour and a half of trademark webb rants , but the d . i . gives us more -- much more . webb's mission is to make a man out of private owens , the local screw-up . the captain gives webb three days to convert owens into marine material or , the captain will " personally cut the lace off his panties and ship him out myself . " ( whether the " lace panties " part refers to webb or owens remains unanswered . ) this , of course , gives webb an excuse to focus all his crotchety energy on making owens' life a living hell . for those of you who haven't been indoctrinated into the pleasures of webb watching , here's a reprint of a typical monologue of his . i can't duplicate his hilarious delivery on paper , but the words should at least partially convey what i'm talking about . . . " now you listen to me , youngster . someday you'll wake up fighting on a beach and you'll pray to god somebody doesn't get killed because of your foolishness . . . i've got a headline for you : every time you make one of those little mistakes of yours , you're gonna turn around and i'll be standing right there . " i couldn't write down all the reprintable dialogue from the d . i . ( nearly all of it belongs in the bad movie hall of fame ) , but i tried to include some of the more noteworthy lines , like one from the scene where webb unwinds from a hard day's work by going to the local bar ( where he orders a tomato juice ) . he meets a woman who , coincidentally , also orders tomato juice but walks away from a typically-stimulating conversation with webb to flirt with his arch-rival , another marine d . i . webb marches over to the table , gets up in her face and says , " just what kind of a dame do you think you are ? " bogart he ain't . the other d . i . gets one of the few memorable non-webb lines when he confesses to the girl , " he's a damn good d . i . . . . i guess i'm just a little jealous . " join the club , we're all jealous of jack webb's way with women , which is showcased even more amusingly in a later scene , as webb finds his way to the woman's place of employment , a lingerie store , and stands around looking incredibly flustered at the negligees on display . " you expect me to talk to you . . . in _here_ ? ! " he exclaims , no doubt intimidated by the barrage of bras . the woman goes off to help a customer , leaving webb to fend for himself once again in this palace of estrogen . a little girl spots him in the store and demands , " what are you doing in here . . . you're a man , aren't you ? " he doesn't reply , but you know he's thinking in his head , " what an odd species of human -- so small . must be one of those children everyone's been talking about . " this poor girl , scarred for life by her early encounter with jack webb , would later swear off the male gender entirely , just one of the many lesbian conversions he's responsible for . the movie doesn't focus too closely on webb's romance , it also continues the owens subplot with probably the most memorable scene in the entire movie , where webb forces his platoon to spend the entire night searching the ground for a flea owens killed during one of their drills . after two privates hatch a scheme to present webb with the wrong dead flea , webb asks owens , " was that flea you killed a male or female ? " owens replies , " a male , sir . " webb yells to the platoon , " this ain't the one ! " that such a scene ( along with the rest of the movie ) was intended to be taken seriously defies comment . but we know it was all presented with the utmost seriousness when a title card at the end thanks the marines not only for their cooperation in the making of the d . i . , but for iwo jima , guadalcanal and every other major battle of the first half of the 20th century . webb held the military in such high esteem that all the soldiers in the movie ( with the exception of owens ) were played by actual marines . someone wanting to parody this movie couldn't do a more comical job than webb did . it makes it all the more ironic ( like raeeyain on your wedding day ) that the man had no sense of humor himself . there's a scene in the movie where the guys are on their break time discussing something and one of them breaks into laughter . webb bursts in the room and shouts , " what did i tell you about laughing ? ! " to which the private replies , " sir , only nine-year-old girls laugh , sir ! " and let me tell you , i was as happy as a nine-year- old girl while watching this movie .

late in down to you , the lead female character ( julia stiles ) states her greatest fear is having an " artificial conversation " with her boyfriend ( freddie prinze jr . ) . the irony of this statement will not be lost on audience members who have not yet walked out , fallen asleep , or otherwise given up on this pathetic attempt at romantic comedy . the film is a multi-million dollar testament to everything artificial . filled with characters , motivation , plot and dialogue that ring fake and shallow at every step this is an unquestionable disaster . prinze plays a college student intent on playing the field until he falls for stiles' freshman co-ed . at first the movie seems to be an attempt to string along scenes with the sole purpose of out-doing the previous in how " cute " it can be . the happy couple " psychoanalyze " each other ; they pick out a song because , as prinze's dj mother ( lucie arnez ) explains , every couple needs a song ; he smells her shampoo ; she scratches his chest in the morning to let him know she wants to make love . then , in standard romantic comedy style , things fall apart . why ? well , because they have to . otherwise the couple can't make up and live ( presumably ) happily ever after . down to you exists outside the realm of normal logic . scenes do not connect to each other and it often seems to be attempting some sort of surrealism , but this is handled so poorly that everything comes off random and stupid instead . a picnic scene involving the six key characters is just bizarre , not only for the stretched logic of these people hanging out together , or even knowing each other , but mostly because an unusual amount of screen time is dedicated to a goat . the supporting characters are remarkably flat , and insultingly ridiculous as well . stiles' best friend ( rosario dawson ) is a pot head , prinze's roommate ( shawn hatosy ) is a girl crazy fool who can't meet women , and then there are the porn stars ( zak orth and selma blair ) . he is one of those famous porn stars who is frequently interviewed on television , does the college lecture circuit , and stars in high budget costume epic porns that are shot on film . you know , the average porn star . the costume epic idea gives him a reason to appear in a different ridiculous outfit everytime he's on screen , the porn angle exists just so there can be a couple of stupid sex jokes . she is a porn star mostly so we know she's slutty , so her very existence will make stiles jealous and prinze tempted . attempts at drama ( which means julia is going to cry ) include a pregnancy scare and the big break up . these characters are so insipid only the most forgiving viewer would be manipulated by these weak scenes . what happened here ? the cast is full of likable , promising , young actors ( stiles especially seems to be going places ) . writer/director kris isacsson has simply given them material so weak not even seasoned pros could pull it off . in fact the whole film feels like a reworking of last year's extremely unpleasant the story of us , for teen audiences . the direction is film-school-grad obvious . it's stylish in a hugely self conscious way which throws in split screen , a pointless parody of " cops , " characters walking into the flashbacks of other characters , and a hilariously cheesy airport meeting between prinze and stiles where all the extras move in fast motion while the couple moves in extreme slow motion . plus , the whole story is told flashback style , narrated by prinze and stiles directly addressing the camera . this is the second film in a row ( following wing commander ) starring freddie prinze jr . which should have premiered on the aisles of the local blockbuster but was likely saved from that fate due to the fluke success of she's all that . if he doesn't start making better choices fast his future films won't be so lucky .

" the celebration " is one of an elite kind of films that is completely absorbant . you know , where you sit down to watch it , and no matter what you've heard about it before , you just can't help but be totally drawn into its story and shocked by every single turn that occurs . i prefer films like these because these are what the best kind of films are like . i don't really feel there are to be any real " rules " for cinema ; a film can do anything , as long as it makes it work . but i do ask that all films have one thing in common : they create experiences . when i watch a film , no matter what kind of film it is , i want to be able to take certain memories along with me . " the celebration " is great because it's chock full of those . it creates a world so completely realistic that everything that occurs is as memorable as the little instances of life that catch your attention and stay with you for the rest of your life . and then it makes things just a tad bit farscial , just to make sure you're paying attention , which you are because what transpires is just so goddam interesting that if you were to ever feel bored , then you're of your attention span needs a bit of a tuning-up . the story takes place at the extravagant home of an aging patriarch ( henning mortizen ) , who has just turned 60 and is having a party thrown for him . all his friends and family turn up , and for the first half hour , we get introduced to everyone , simplistically and realistically ( no aggravatingly condescending posing for the camera deals here ) . the eldest son , christian ( ulrich thomsen , looking a bit like a young malcolm mcdowell ) , is the first to be seen in the film , walking to his father's home . his brother , michael ( thomas bo larsen ) , drives by , pulls over , greets him , then kicks his family out of the car , forcing them to walk to the estate , just so christian can be comfortable . we then meet helene ( paprika steen ) , their sister , a woman who always seems to be stressed-out , who invites the driver of her car ( gbatokai dakinah ) , an american , to to come join her at the party she's going to . once they're all there and settled in , the party begins , and as custom , the eldest son has to make a speech to his dad , so christian stands up , at the head of the table , and reveals the film's punchline : his father raped all his children at a young age . but since this is a family/friends affair , his confession becomes more detested than the supposed truth , and is simply brushed off despite his efforts , and what transpires is sorta like jerry springer crossed with jean renoir , and it's all terribly interesting to watch . twists occur , and soon the film has taken on a nearly-farsical nature , but still seems realistic because the people involved really feel like they could reach such ends . the most notorious thing about this film , which has been getting the most notice , though , is that the director , thomas vinterberg has shot it in a completely awkward fashion . as a member of the danish filmmakers clan , dogme 95 , a group that has vowed to oppose " the auteur concept , make-up , illusions , and dramaturgical predictability " so that they may " purge film so that once again the inner lives of the characters justify the plot . " i have not seen " breaking the waves , " the other notable film by a member of this group ( lars von trier , to be exact ) , but " the celebration " works exquisitely in this department . it feels like reality , like you're actually watching real people and not actors , and as a major pointer , has been shot on video . as a result , it looks more like the home movies you never dare shot of your family than an actual film , but always wanted to . we see key moments in people's lives that they wouldn't dare show to the world , and it captures the farscial comedy of life so accurately and acutely that this style , as ironically-showmanship as it really is , works perfectly for the nature of the film . the key , though , to this film , and the reason it's not just a cool danish import , is because this film is not about revealing the truth as much as it is about the way people react to such an explosive truth . throughout the film , we see a completely realized debate over the truth and the effects it has on the lives of those who have learned to live with lies , a debate so three-dimensional that it could easily blow oliver stone and his the-truth-at-all-costs reasoning out of the water . of course it was not right for the father to rape his children , and of course , they couldn't have fought back then , and of course this has created scarring suppression inside them . and yes , it's thearapeutic for one to release the truth years later , when they know it could easily destroy the one who emotionally destroyed them earlier . but then again , the father , after all , is not a totally bad guy , and we can see the emotional complications that arise thanks to a performance by mortizen which is just so great and touching that while we do believe that he could have raped his children years earlier , we also see a man who has also learned to live with what he's done , and deep down , feels true guilt that is only now beginning to surface . the final scene , involving mortizen and everyone else , is utterly devastating , thanks to him and thomsen , whose performance is utterly flawless and equally emotionally complex . everyone else is flawless as well - the actors never seem to be stepping into the shoes of their characters as much as they do walking comfortably in them . the actors or writers have not made the mistake to judge these characters in the slightest : there are no whites or blacks but instead all grays , exactly like life . as such , " the celebration " may be the one truly bizarro film of the year : a work of art so eerily close to reality that it's utterly disturbing and utterly fascinating .

the summer of 00' wasn't a very good one for devout cinephiles . it offered no blair witches or sixth senses ; the best big budget hollywood could do was an efficient x-men adaptation and a flawed but entertaining shaft update . nurse betty signals the unofficial end of that dreadful summer movie season and the commencement of a potentially brighter fall movie season , that battery-charging ( at least for critics who have to sit through every piece o' shit that moseys into multiplexes ) time of year when all those oscar contenders ( read : " quality " films ) compete for audiences . alas betty has the dubious distinction of being the first overpraised junk heap of the new season . it's also indie director neil labute's first attempt at something resembling a mainstream picture , and i'm sad to report it's a resounding failure ( at least on this web site ) , a mess that's as hopelessly saccharine as people have accused labute's previous films of being unrelentingly masochistic . i went in expecting something decent , for betty was gleefully praised , it's screenplay even winning an award at cannes , but i exited shaking my noggin in bewilderment . are critics so desperate for something unique that they're blind to how derivative the particular brand of " uniqueness " betty dolls out is ? for the first time labute is working from a script he has not written , and he seems unsure of how to handle the material . betty tries to be hip like pulp fiction ( this is another flick featuring a pair of strangely bright and articulate hit men ) , enchanting like the wizard of oz ( of which this film makes several allusions to ) and heartwarming like [stick in your favorite loveable misfit movie] , but by the end it left me cold with its calculated desperation . it's labute's half hearted attempt to make a crowd pleaser and he doesn't even seem to have half that heart in it . nurse betty concerns a soap opera addict , betty ( brilliantly played by renee zellweger ) , who witnesses the killing of her husband , del ( aaron eckhart playing the most casually loutish husband since richard benjamin in diary of a mad housewife ) by two hit men ( morgan freeman and chris rock ) . she happens to have her most beloved soap on in the background and somehow merges the two realities . she's blocked out her husband's death and thinks she's a character in her favorite soap , a reason to love . betty sets out on the road to la ( with some drugs unknowingly stashed in her car trunk ) searching for her soap boyfriend dr . david ravell ( greg kinnear ) while the two bickering hit men follow in not so close pursuit . the labute who birthed the extraordinary in the company of men , slipped a bit ( but not much ) with his sophomore effort , your friends and neighbors , then fell straight on his ass with bash , a play he penned that was recently aired on showtime . the play demonstrated no forward movement as an artist , only labute's persistence in wallowing in the horrid things " average " people do to each other , usually with out realizing how horrid they themselves are . in the play , paul rudd , as an obnoxious jock , delivers a monologue detailing how he once followed a gay man into a bathroom and beat him maybe to death , while his clueless girlfriend essentially regards his sadistic behaviors as something along the old maxim " boys will be boys " . another character , schlubby businessman reacts to the loss of his job by actually killing his own baby ! what was once so powerful about labute's work , the casual , nonchalant cruelty and selfishness ( often elements we all have in us amplified to a disgusting degree ) had become so over the top it was borderline comic . obviously , at this point , labute could use a dose of some different kind of material before he pigeon holes himself further , but nurse betty isn't it . he clearly has little passion for what he's doing here , instead replacing his mojo with strained quirks ( one of the hit men is a huge soap fan , and the character of betty would be little more than a one joke gimmick if zelllweger hadn't managed to transcend that ) tailor made to appeal to the widest possible audience . nearly every scene between chris rock and morgan freeman fatally slows the picture down , as the two are made to enact soft-boiled tarantino-esque dialogue . they evince little chemistry , with rock constantly in over the top rant mode , acting more like an angry comic than any thing resembling a hit man ( an occupation that's represented far too frequently in movies nowadays ) . i think rock is a great comic yet he hasn't been able to bring his feral intelligence to movies , whenever he acts , and no matter the part , it's like he's doing the damn chris rock show . surprisingly ( at least considering her work in me , myself and irene ) renee zellweger gives a revelatory performance , building on her baby faced , apple pie looks . that wide-open face and helium voiced earnestness suggests a little girl not fully grown into her thirty-year-old body . it's the best work she's ever done . freeman is effective as always , though his performance nonetheless suffers because it seems at odds with where the movie wants to take it . the actor plays the role in his usual calm , collected manner , though the flick tries to insinuate a symbolic kinship between his character and betty's , suggesting that both are controlled by their fantasies rather than reality . that's interesting but the movie doesn't do anything with it other than crash land the sub-theme into a labored speech in the midst of a badly staged gun battle . the film has good moments ( many of the scenes involving a very good greg kinnear , especially his confrontation with zellweger ) , an almost soothing , lyrical score ( and you know a movie's in trouble when the score sticks out as one of the best things about it ) but nothing jells , it's parts , good or bad , are so disparate as to be opposing . the film might have worked had it settled on being one type of film , a mainstream , female forrest gump or an oddball art film , but as both if it falls as flat as diet coke . betty's screenplay makes the mistake of relying too much on concurrence , without which betty wouldn't make any progress in the film . nurse betty is a film driven by coincidence rather than charter , like how betty becomes a nurse in the film , a job that she takes in order to get closer to her imaginary lover ; she happens to be at the hospital at the exact moment that a drive by shooting takes place and miraculously knows how to take care of the victim's wound because she happened to see how on tv , which leads to her being offered a room with the victim's girlfriend who eventually gets betty into a party where she meets kinnear ? ? ? a little too tidy , don'tcha think . betty has an interesting theme , though it doesn't even seem aware of this . the current state of tv has been leaning towards reality television what with the enormous success of survivor and moderate success of big brother , with more on the way . this is a film about a women so deluded as to think that her favorite soap opera is reality ( ironically real-life survivor sean kennif has taken a part as a doctor on the soap opera guiding light ) . instead of exploring this timely matter in a way relating to the current tv craze ( since the film does largely appear to be a satire of television , albeit one that would feel more appropriate in the '80s than the '00s ) , the film simply uses betty's delusions as a plot device to get her from point a to b . no progress is made and little is unearthed except that maybe labute could use a bit of rest and a lot of contemplation .