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HappyCorpse

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I built a sandcastle with my nephew. We made one small castle.

I built a sandcastle with my nephew

I forgot to wear my virus-proof mask when I visited the pet store.

I forgot to wear my virus-proof mask when I visited the nursing home.

I had to give a speech for class. My friends applauded for me.

I had to give a speech for class.

I cooked breakfast.

I cooked breakfast. I threw it up after.

I go to buy a new saxophone from the instrument shop.

I go to buy a new saxophone from the instrument shop. Their are no saxophones left at the shop.

My cousin asked me to sing at his bar mitzvah and I agreed.

My cousin asked me to sing at his bar mitzvah and my voice broke on stage.

I spent the afternoon playing hide and go seek with my younger brother. He giggled and had a huge smile every time I caught him.

I spent the afternoon playing hide and go seek with my younger brother. It wore him out enough to take a nap without whining.

I went for a well baby checkup. I got up to date immunization records.

I went for a well baby checkup.

I went to the ballroom to stretch. I went to the ballroom to dance with my friend.

I went to the ballroom to stretch. I wen to the ballroom just to dance with someone.

I made my own coffee this morning. It was ok.

I made my own coffee this morning.

I decided to hatch my own eggs at home. I kept the incubator warm and all my eggs hatched.

I decided to hatch my own eggs at home.

When I took out all the parts to build my new desk, I realized that I had extra parts.

When I took out all the parts to build my new desk, I realized that I was missing some parts.

I made a new bed for my dachshund with a suitcase I recycled. The interesting bed was featured on the front page of a Kennel club Magazine.

I made a new bed for my dachshund with a suitcase I recycled. The bed was the only place the dog would sleep.

I play with my cat by having him chase a red laser on the floor.

I play with my cat by having him chase a red laser on the floor. I play with my cat by having him chase a red laser on the floor. Sometimes he'll run into something and knock it over..

I spoke to the group, and we settled on a deadline.

I spoke to the group, and we couldn't agree on anything.

I went to the beach last sunday. I forgot my sunscreen.

I went to the beach last sunday. I forgot my sunscreen and am sunburned now.

I was doing my taxes.

I was doing my taxes. I got confused and had to hire someone to help.

I was talking on my phone as the plane was about to take off. I finished my conversation just in time.

I was talking on my phone as the plane was about to take off. The person I was talking to understood I needed to hang up.

I took a bite into my bowl of ice cream and found pieces of chocolate.

I took a bite into my bowl of ice cream and found pieces of glass.

I started taking cooking classes. I am doing good but i have to keep practicing.

I started taking cooking classes.

James decided to set up an A-line manufactured home high in the mountains.

James decided to set up an A-line manufactured home high in the mountains. He rapidly grew tired of the snow.

My niece was performing in a play.

My niece was performing in a play. She forgot some of her lines in a scene.

I decided to get a sandwich from a truck stop.

I decided to get a sandwich from a truck stop. It smelled like a dead rat.

I danced at the local club. I danced for several hours but was so tired toward the end of the night.

I danced at the local club. I danced at the local club and now my leg is sore.

I got paid with a check for my babysitting job last night.

I got paid with an IOU for my babysitting job last night.

I tried to pet a stray cat in my neighborhood

I tried to pet a stray cat in my neighborhood It hissed and ran away

I made a pot on my own in clay class. The lid wouldn't fit on the top.

I made a pot on my own in clay class. It fell and was broken in the kiln.

After the hurricane, my backyard was covered in leaves.

After the hurricane, my backyard was covered in fallen trees.

I drove my boyfriend to the medical center for his colonoscopy, and waited for him in the waiting room until it was done.

I drove my boyfriend to the medical center for his colonoscopy, and had to wait for him in the car until it was done, because of the pandemic restrictions.

I went to the city fair. I won multiple prizes at the fair.

I went to the city fair. I ran into my friends at the gate.

I found out the new clothes I bought online were used after receiving them.

I found out the new clothes I bought online were used while wearing them.

I climbed up on the roof, I looked into the distance, it was clear.

I climbed up on the roof, I looked into the distance, it was cloudy.

I received a text notification letting me know that my credit card payment was due.

I received a text notification letting me know that my credit card payment was past due.

I walked to the corner store to buy some beer. The store had already closed.

I walked to the corner store to buy some beer. While inside, the store was robbed, and so was I.

I adopted all the stray pets I came across. The animals damaged my couch and soiled my furniture, i have nothing to sit on and no money to replace it.

I adopted all the stray pets I came across. The county condemned my house because of the smell they created, rendering me homeless.

I called my state office to apply for welfare. The officer I talked to called me names and warned me not to call again.

I called my state office to apply for welfare. I was turned down because I waited too long to apply, even though it was impossible to get through on their phone systems.

I made cocktails for the party. I spilled the pitcher on the floor.

I made cocktails for the party. I spilled the pitcher on the floor and two people slipped on the mess and got hurt.

My daughter was sick so I went to the pharmacy to get medicine, but it was expensive.

My daughter was sick so I went to the pharmacy to get medicine, but it was closed.

I went to the dentist. I was told I had no issues with my teeth.

I went to the dentist. The dentist said I needed to brush better.

I visited Lake Tahoe last winter.

I visited Lake Tahoe last winter. The water was fouled and filthy.

I dropped my toothbrush into the bathroom sink.

I dropped my toothbrush onto the bathroom floor.

My dog never wants to go outside with me unless it's bright and sunny.

My dog never wants to go outside with me unless it's raining.

I was walking down a dark alley and saw a homeless person peeing.

I was walking down a dark alley and saw a homeless person getting mugged.

My shoulder was not paining me few minutes ago

My shoulder was paining me few minutes ago

I tried to do my hair myself. I saved money by not going to a professional.

I tried to do my hair myself.

I went on Twitter and posted a new recipe I came up with.

I went on Twitter and posted a new recipe I came up with. People didn't like it and posted negative comments.

I was invited to a bingo game. I won a few hundred dollars as winnings.

I was invited to a bingo game. I won a gift card for yelling out bingo.

My wife and I put up a lot of decorations for Halloween. Pictures of it became viral and our house was featured on national TV!

My wife and I put up a lot of decorations for Halloween. It was a hit with the neighborhood.

I laid out a picnic blanket in what turned out to be a patch of clover.

I laid out a picnic blanket in what turned out to be a patch of stinging nettles.

I saw two kangaroos boxing in my backyard and made a video.

I saw two kangaroos boxing in my backyard and got hit by a stray smack.

I went outside to fly a kite. The wind pitched my kite high up into the sky, and I played for hours.

I went outside to fly a kite. The wind wasn't very strong, but I got my kite up in the air.

My new computer is mailed to my house. I put it in my room and start installing my games on the hard drive.

My new computer is mailed to my house.

I went skydiving for the first time. I screamed all the way down and passed out.

I went skydiving for the first time. I hit several tree branches while landing and got many scratches

My dad built a tire swing for me in the back yard with a tractor tire he brought home from work.

My dad built a tire swing for me in the back yard with a tractor tire he brought home from work. One day when I was swinging on it, the branch broke and I fell.

I lost a bet with my father. I was forced to clean out his garage and go to the dump for him.

I lost a bet with my father. I had to repair his wrap around porch, adding railings, at my expense.

Ugh! There are coffee grounds at the bottom of my cup of coffee.

Ugh! There are pepper grounds at the bottom of my cup of coffee.

I went to the nursing home, and saw my grandma.

I went to the nursing home, and it was off limits.

I dragged raced against my friend.

I dragged raced against my friend. We were caught by the police.

I went to a high school reunion. I got a stomach ache and couldnt attend.

I went to a high school reunion. I fell down and broke my leg.

I became determined to find out why the dishwasher doesn't drain.

I became determined to find out why the dishwasher doesn't drain. I checked to see if the main drain was clogged but it wasn't.

I took a walk in the park this afternoon.

I took a walk in the parking lot this afternoon.

My nephew is visiting from England. We sat and spoke for a while to catch up.

My nephew is visiting from England.

I was promoted to assistant manager at the McDonald's. I have to work more hours but I don't get more money.

I was promoted to assistant manager at the McDonald's. .I get shouted at by customers for 60 hours a week for no additional money.

I decided to buy ten tickets at my church's raffle.

I decided to buy ten tickets at my church's raffle. I didn't win anything.

I saw a wild mountain lion while hiking alone. The animal stared at me, staring at my face.

I saw a wild mountain lion while hiking alone. The animal crouched, ready to pounce toward me.

I was waiting for my plane at the airport. My plane was a half hour late.

I was waiting for my plane at the airport. I had gone to the airport on the wrong day.

I started writing a novel.

I started writing a novel. I cant focus well, i have been slacking off.

My car brokedown.

My car brokedown. I had to buy new tires.

At the video arcade, I was able to meet some of my old friends from middle school. We were able to talk about our old experiences together.

At the video arcade, I was able to meet some of my old friends from middle school. However, none of them had a recollection of me.

I took my dog to the beach. We walked and went back home.

I took my dog to the beach.

I rented a beach house last month.

I rented a beach house last month. There were cigarettes in the ashtray when we got there.

my son takes me to a baseball game. Our team pulls ahead of the other team by 7 points.

my son takes me to a baseball game.

I invited everyone over for a nice potluck dinner. There was plenty to eat and everyone had fun.

I invited everyone over for a nice potluck dinner.

I took my dog for a walk. My dog was barking at everyone, he wasn't having a nice time.

I took my dog for a walk. The leash broke and my dog attacked a girl.

I put a scoop of coconut ice cream in my bowl.

I put a scoop of dried apricots in my bowl.

I ate a burrito for dinner.

I ate a burrito for dinner. I didn't feel well afterwards.

I went to walk my dog in the park. My dog made friends with other dogs in the park.

I went to walk my dog in the park.

My girlfriend stayed with me overnight.

My girlfriend stayed with me overnight. I said something stupid and she slapped me.

The teacher called me up the front of the class to introduce myself.

The teacher called me up the front of the class to introduce myself. I got nervous when I saw everyone and I started to stutter.

When I hired the detective to see if my husband was having an affair, he waited in the parking garage while I was out, and saw my husband drive up, park, and shake hands with a well-dressed man carrying a briefcase who walked over as if on cue.

When I hired the detective to see if my husband was having an affair, he waited in the parking garage while I was out, and saw my husband drive up, park, and a woman who might have been an 'escort' got out of the passenger side, dressed in a skin-tight, short dress and carrying a bottle of liquor.

I began to raise turkeys in my yard. I had some delicious meat for dinner.

I began to raise turkeys in my yard.

I made a bird house. I put it outside but there was a storm that knocked it out of the tree.

I made a bird house. I put it outside but the birds were attacked by a stray cat when they went inside.

I went into a rainforest to document the wildlife. I got bit all over by mosquitoes.

I went into a rainforest to document the wildlife. I slipped into a river and ruined all of my equipment.

My dad brought me a set of speakers. The speakers went well with my home entertainment system and new computer.

My dad brought me a set of speakers. The speakers went well with my new computer.

I went for a walk on a bridge. The day was peaceful with no ill events.

I went for a walk on a bridge.

I decided to go on vacation to Australia.

I decided to go on vacation to Australia. The heat was absolutely brutal.

I was playing the guitar on the street. A business owner told me to leave.

I was playing the guitar on the street. I was arrested for loitering on the street.

They built a new bridge near where I live to alleviate traffic, people still take the old route.

They built a new bridge near where I live to alleviate traffic, it made traffic worse by my house.

I was in a car accident today. My car was totaled but I was not hurt.

I was in a car accident today. My friend drove me to the hospital to have my injuries looked at.

My son bought me a cake.

My son bought me a cake. It was a plain cake.

I planted some flowers in the big pot on the front stoop, and are still blooming.

I planted some flowers in the big pot on the front stoop, and the deer ate them.

I've been using a fifteen pound medicine ball to workout for the last month and my cardio has improved noticeably.

I've been using a fifteen pound medicine ball to workout for the last month and I'm not sure I've seen any results.

I read a book by Stephanie Meyer. It was the most god-awful attempt at English prose I've ever seen.

I read a book by Stephanie Meyer. The awful prose and sexism infuriated me so much I sent Stephanie Meyer death threats.

I took my cat to the ve.t I found out there is nothing wrong with his health.

I took my cat to the vet

I was playing basketball with my friends. We entered a tournament and won first place with a cash prize.

I was playing basketball with my friends. We entered a tournament and won first place.

I dropped a heavy iron skillet on my foot.

I dropped a heavy iron skillet on my foot. I was barefoot and cracked a toe bone.

The back seat of the taxi I rode in smelled of leather.

The back seat of the taxi I rode in smelled of cigarettes.

I ordered a new video game online last week on Amazon. It took a month to get to my house despite the promised two day shipping.

I ordered a new video game online last week on Amazon. It got to my house today but when I opened it, it was not the game that was advertised.

The pharmacy made me wait to refill my prescription.

The pharmacy was completely out of my prescription.

I stopped to eat a fast food restaurant.

I stopped to eat a fast food restaurant. My food was a bit too cold.