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French | Le temps de Rd n'est pas le charme, je suppose vraiment honnêtement ne sais pas pourquoi je poste ici, mais la troisième fois n'était pas un charme que j'avais déjà tenté des temps de suicide dans l'année mon grand-père est décédé et n'a pas pensé à cela pendant longtemps jusqu'à ce que je sois vraiment ivre et que je prenne des pilules en décembre. |
English | Want to live but bad prognosis from chronic illness Worse every day Don't do what I need too Soon will be too weak to even kill myself |
English | I m only and i m about to give up there's so many things wrong my abusive stepfather my absent father my mother who loves me but won't accept me for being myself the fact that I can barely stand to look at myself in a mirror the general stress of school i m breaking down I don't know who to talk to last time I tried to get help I was sent to some Christian counseling thing that didn't help at all I don't know what to do this has been going on for almost years and i m barely holding on |
English | The thoughts of suicide grow bigger every day am years old, and I am living with depression and an eating disorder for over a decade now As bad as it was I never thought of killing myself Except for the last to months It started small, but I can see that the thought of it comes more and more I am scared that it will grow more, and I don't know who to turn to since my therapist doesn't know what to do anymore except for sending me to a clinic and that's not possible because of work I want these thoughts to stop, but I feel so helpless |
English | I'm lost Long story short I have nothing left for me, I m years old I live with my parents I just quit a k year job because after a year of working hour weeks I thought I was going to end it I'm supposed to start a new job on Monday but I don't think i ll make it that long I have people dear to me of them are men both of them are great friends and the third was the girl who I thought I would make my wife She let me know tonight that there's a snowballs chance in hell that's going to happen The thought of me starting a family with her was the ONLY FUCKING THING that kept me going I no longer have that I'm just so fucking lost and don't know what to do I'm sick of this pain SICK OF IT I don't want to cause the few who care about me pain but I don't think I can fucking take anymore myself After the shit i ve seen and done in the military I just fucking can't I guess i m asking for help No Begging I wish I had more options but after so many years those have been exhausted and I just don't see the light anymore |
French | Je suis une femme trans cachée dans le sud, j'avais un épisode de dysphorie de genre et j'ai fait ce que je fais habituellement pour me calmer, j'ai pratiqué l'organe de l'autre côté de mon campus universitaire, l'organe est à peu près à pieds du sol, il fallait des barres très minimales pour protéger l'organiste de tomber. |
French | J'y pense tous les jours Je ne sais pas vraiment pourquoi j'ai créé ce déchet ou pourquoi j'ai posté Je sais les réponses Je vais juste avoir l'enfer J'ai posté sur ce sous-marin positivement quand j'ai senti que j'avais quelque chose à contribuer Voici la chose que j'ai eu dans la trentaine Je suis une petite entreprise et j'emploie quelqu'un je suis quelqu'un je suis stressant |
English | Fiancé is gone Acyclic event eventually has plagued me again The tides of time of repeated themselves and my constant struggle against bipolar disorder has once again ruined any bright spots in my life During my deep bouts of depression I lose what makes me attractive enticing and a pleasure be to around I do not crave success adventure or happiness Instead I become a pile of filth with little redeeming qualities I cannot blame those who I effect around me, I go from an intelligent and hardworking member of society and spiral into the depths of the worst type of sloth self loathing and empty personifications that can be imagined This is the second love I have lost because I have not been able to climb the insurmountable wall of depression that may as well be just two feet tall How many more times to I have to go through this torture I don't feel anything this time grief is, but a passing thought loss is just a memory pain is dull and sedated I just am tired of waking up and going through it all again over and over only to feel the same hollow emptiness when the cycle repeats itself |
English | Stuck pixel on a big screen had dreams of going into space when I was little Now I fantasize about starting up my VR rig and shooting myself while looking at the stars in Elite Dangerous I've been stagnant for over years now People talk about how they change over time but I'm trapped here if you could give my body to anyone else I would Why can't I grow as a god-damn person I don't think I'm capable of being a healthy person any more I want to be able to fall asleep without hating myself |
French | null |
French | La mort n'est qu'espoir Pas forte ou disciplinée Une personnalité addictive ressemble parfois à de la discipline mais c'est souvent juste une incapacité à arrêter de creuser Je me rends compte que j'ai juste été très chanceux deux fois dans ma vie A vécu les échos de cette chance jusqu'à ce que je la baise. |
French | null |
French | La nuit dernière aurait dû être ma dernière Après des années de médicaments rendez-vous avec le médecin thérapie et sérieusement essayer d'être arrivé à un point de désespoir massif, je suis arrivé avec des pensées suicidaires depuis de nombreuses années, mais jamais à la mesure de la nuit dernière, j'ai eu plusieurs plans de la façon dont je prendrais ma vie, mais la nuit dernière mourir ma première tentative réelle, je me suis assis seul dans ma chambre après avoir atteint un point de terreur, la colère |
French | Je ne vais pas mieux. J'ai décidé que ça ne va pas aller mieux. Essayer comme je pourrais, je ne peux pas dépasser ce que j'ai traversé. a me déchire tous les jours. Je ne veux plus ressentir ça. Si j'avais une méthode facile pour le faire. |
French | Je ne veux plus avoir peur de la paranoïa et de l'anxiété avec la dépression Je vis tous les jours dans la peur Je ne peux plus le faire Je me déteste tellement et j'ai toujours peur que l'on me regarde Les gens prennent des photos de moi par derrière Il n'y a pas un moment où je n'ai pas peur ou triste j'ai posté sur ce sous-marin plusieurs fois mais je ne peux plus le faire |
English | This book helped me Last year I was struggling with a form of OCD that came to fruition Apparently I had some seriously unresolved issues for my childhood which I never dealt with About this book and it really helped me start to overcome a lot of the trauma that I had never addressed I'm hoping it can help a few people here too HTTPS smile Amazon com DP ref cm SW r CP APA i TU Ebb CPHX |
English | Need someone to talk to x post with r depression need help Someone to talk to or help me vent something I moved to this new city where I know nobody My wife and I both came here I was already depressed She was literally my world Even now five months after we split I'm desperately in love with her and don't know what to do But I hate her Kind of She had an affair Emotional for sure possibly physical Especially without it played out I believe it was physical I've had a fairly rough life with an abusive stepfather drug addled mother and growing up on my own as a lower class family on welfare I'm doing alright for myself but I know nobody I've always been a loner because I grew up with one friend I confided everything in him and he was all the support I needed Just the one person When I met my wife I joined the military, and we moved away She became everything to me, I didn't need other friends serious ones I had work friends and the casual hang out friend so when we moved away to this new town I once again knew nobody However once we got here we started growing distant She met this guy started hanging out with him and that was it She started going on dates even spent my fucking birthday on a date with him showing up past pm with gifts I specifically said I hadn't wanted Fallout had no interest in game and having bailed on the one thing I wanted that we always did go out to dinner together she ate with him A bunch of other shit happened I finally broke up with her, I was scared desperate and lonely I took too long breaking up with her and she just hurt me more and more I finally had to plan my own break-up because every time I tried previously she d sweet talk me back into staying How it would work out etc. So I actually plan my own break-up Wasn't that a fun fucking weekend Now it s months later and I feel like I'm falling apart I've spent essentially four months completely alone I don't know anybody here I'm not on speaking terms with any of my family I cut ties with that original friend years ago because he took a bad path in life and was a terrible influence I just don't know what to do and I'm scared because I feel like everything is falling apart And it hurts and I'm scared because I can't control myself or my thoughts or anything |
French | Est-ce que j'ai fini, je coupe mes artères radiales avec un couteau de poche, j'ai mangé de l'aspirine et de l'alcool dur, j'espère augmenter mon flux sanguin, c'est peut-être ce que nous sommes censés être des machines auto-conscientes capables de se reconnaître comme défectueuses et auto-destructrices. |
French | Je veux brûler chaque pont Je veux brûler chaque pont Je veux brûler chaque amitié Chaque relation et toute autre raison quelqu'un se soucierait de moi, Je veux devenir une personne ignoble que les gens se réjouiront quand je prends ma propre vie Le problème actuel est trop de gens me manquerait Donc mon idée est que si tout le monde me déteste, alors cela rendra ma mort plus facile. |
English | Things are clearly different for you and me I'm not ugly nor am I mean but there s something wrong with me, it's an urge to die and dance with the empty space beyond |
English | I need peace m done with this life I m and have been suffering from anxiety and OCD attacks for years now My energy and spirit has been sapped and there's nothing I wish to do more than go into a state of deep sleep forever I love my father so much but the pain is starting to exceed that love I'm a broken man and I want to go |
English | don't know where to turn title says it all I feel awful closer and closer to suicide every day I feel like if I say my feelings to someone I can start to get better but i don't know where to turn hence why I'm posting here I have no real relationships my family doesn't care about me and the only thing keeping me here is my job I'm not even and I feel like I'm drowning in negativity and self-hatred I thought I was happy but I'm not and it's my fault I've secluded myself, so people only use me to get substances or give them physical company because they're SO s are far away no one wants me past that though I have no inspiration to do anything anymore painting being bubbly and nice continuing on my recovery even my job which I love more than anything gives me so much anxiety I ruined tonight for my family we were going to have s mores and a good time but my younger brother made me mad we argued and I drove to a park nearby to calm down my mom didn't know where I went neither did her girlfriend nor my brother I was gone for an hour and a half no one called or texted to ask where I was or if I was ok i didn't leave because I wanted to get those worried calls and texts but after sitting at that park for an hour and a half I was like why haven't I have gotten them does no one care and I realized that no one cares at all when I got home no one even said anything to me, I have friends that use me a family that doesn't care and my whole optimistic nihilism philosophy is hard when i don't seem to be enjoyed by people I'm around i don't have a plan to kill myself i really don't even know if this sub is for this kinda stuff I just searched suicide for a place to put my thoughts I JUST HAVE AN OVERWHELMING FEEDING OF DOOM AND ANXIETY A DIMINISHING FEELING OF BEING SECURE IN MYSELF AND MY RELATIONSHIPS AND LESS AND LESS SPIRIT TO CONTINUE ON WITH MY LIFE and I just needed somewhere to talk without being judged by people I know or sent to a mental hospital i don't need replies or votes or anything just to say it thanks for reading this if you do |
French | null |
French | il n'y a aucun moyen de s'en sortir pour moi si quelqu'un peut nommer une chose à part attendre, alors peut-être que je serai plus optimiste, ce n'est la faute de personne, c'est la façon dont mes parents sont émotionnellement et verbalement abusifs et je vole, je ne peux plus le supporter, je suis en neuvième année, donc je devrais attendre plus d'années, même si mes parents me paient entièrement, mais ils refusent d'aller chez un chrétien. |
French | Mon anniversaire vient de passer se demander ce qui se passera quand je serai parti je serai en vedette je suis journal y aura-t-il des articles sur ma mort quelqu'un me mentionner sur les médias sociaux quelqu'un arrêtera-t-il et penser à moi amp x B je n'ai jamais vraiment eu d'importance je voulais juste un jour me sentir comme si j'avais de l'importance |
French | Pourquoi tout le monde obtient le pardon mais pas moi Salut, je suis juste pour que MMM je ne sais pas juste confus pourquoi tout le monde obtient le pardon mais pas moi par exemple, j'ai vraiment aimé une fille alors j'ai fait quelque chose de stupide juste des trucs ivres ne pas la battre juste parler c'est tout ce qui l'a rendue folle et ne m'a jamais parlé depuis alors que cette même fille a été battue par son petit ami |
English | Existing vs living m in a downswing yet again and ruminating about my failures While doing, so I read an article about depression and suicide In it the author spoke about little things in your life things you do that are positive and beneficial to other people How you make the world a brighter place with the smallest things And that's true I can count many things today and yesterday that other people have done to make me smile Despite everything going on I still see kindness and purity in the souls of a few people I try to be that same light or ray of sunshine for others too I could continue to do that indefinitely I could scrap the idea of suicide and continue to live out my unfulfilling life and be the person I became in the wake of my trauma and make people happy I could bring light in that way But it would continue to kill me like it s been killing me for over half a year now bits and pieces of my psyche coming apart a little at a time I had my first ever breakdown a few weeks ago I'm not doing so good I've decided to stop talking about it to the people I care about I can't escape it Back to my point Could I continue to live and make other people happy comfort them help them Yes But for the first time I ask what about me What about MY happiness The only thing I ever wanted I can never have Doing other things is just existing not living I have a need to feel alive and no one understands this Without this thing life is pointless to me, I get no personal satisfaction no joy It's not worth living I look on at those who have this thing, and I am filled with self-hate and disgust and inferiority I cannot take cannot stomach the thought of just existing like this for years I feel like screaming until I lose my voice that is how painful it is |
French | Désolé pour la longueur, mais je lirais les vôtres Cela a pris beaucoup de temps à partager Je n'ai jamais fait ça avant Alors je suis un père d'un an et un vieux je peux être avec ma femme J'ai été avec ma femme J'ai été presque des années Je ne peux pas rester silencieux Je ne peux pas être que j'ai besoin d'aide J'ai besoin d'aide J'ai besoin de quelqu'un |
English | Not sure how much i ll handle this anymore |
French | J'ai une maladie en moi et ça me tue Je suis un soi-disant perfectionniste L'échec n'est pas une option Quand je vois ma famille Je vois une famille riche et parfaite Ils font tout ce qui est parfait Je ne peux pas échouer Le mois prochain sur le Je vais avoir mon examen de conduite Le temps que je décide aujourd'hui que je vais me tuer Peut-être que je vais échouer à nouveau Il n'y a pas de place pour l'échec |
English | Place to talk about suicides there a place to discuss suicide with people rationally I mean without people talking you down I just want a place to have reasonable conversations about suicide where I'm not met with responses like don't do it I checked Reddit, but subs like r opting out and r Hoodie have been removed |
English | I think I'm doing better but the thoughts are still their attempted a short while back I had gotten to a really low place academically and socially where I felt really alone and that it was the only for sure way out of all the stress and pain of the world at the time I couldn't see any light Every day was miserable and I didn't feel like I was even in the world, so I thought I would just take myself out of it I despised law school never truly belonged to any group since I was little and I didn't feel like the rat race of life was worth it I wasn't successful obviously but I still have lingering thoughts angry at myself for not being able to follow through and still wanting in a tiny voice at the back of my head to go through with it The voice says that life is pointless and that I nor anyone really can make any significant contribution or do anything of any real significance because nothing has meaning There's no purpose to existence and since life is only going to bring more pain and sorrow in the future then why not just end it on my own terms now Love emotion family all of those are nothing I am nothing How can I stop thinking this way to prevent an attempt from happening again |
English | My willpower feels like it's being drained Hi this isn't the first time I've posted on here I've sat here deleted and rewritten everything a couple of times now I'm now and am I going to college to be a radiology technician I recently switched majors from IT It has been months since I was dumped and that has really been the trigger to how I feel at the moment I have no real close friends left, and my social anxiety has gotten worse making it very difficult to express how I feel to my family I attempted to take my life back in September but ultimately decided I couldn't do it because the thought of my parents and brothers finding me terrifies me But now I'm starting to feel less and less okay about the idea of living I really cannot find a purpose to keep on if I'm going to remain unhappy forever I can't find a point to slogging on through school work and life in general I've been told change something I just wish I knew what I needed to change I'm too afraid to tell my parents the way I feel I just feel so stuck and unmotivated to even help myself It's pure laziness and I shouldn't even feel this way because I had a good childhood plenty of friends and a loving family I just want to know what the fuck is wrong with me |
English | I've had enough Fuck being me I m bound for the floor I'm a debased another modern waster I just don't get it I can't keep it copacetic I'm just pathetic |
English | Do you wish something from next life I have already given up I am also waiting for my death funny right I have made a clock that tells me how many days I have left to die I am already now and if approx I live I have yrs left So that's around k days left There are little things I want to accomplish before I die but if I can't then hope next life would be sweeter I want to live minimalist life I want to have good desk setup I want to have less health problems and live healthy for once Silly I know What about you guys Is there anything you lost hope this time and waiting for next life that can't be fixed this time |
French | Je continue à chercher le moyen le plus indolore et le plus facile de mettre fin à ma vie. J'ai lutté contre la dépression depuis que je suis enfant. Bien qu'avant, c'était gérable ces dernières années, c'était nettement pire. Plus je vieillis, plus je me demande ce que c'est. |
French | Mon propriétaire a appelé pour l'odeur d'un corps mort Mon propriétaire essaie clairement de me sortir de mon appartement Mes voisins ont été délibérément me garder éveillé J'ai probablement dormi une heure chaque nuit pour Je ne sais même pas combien de nuits plus Le propriétaire avait un appel ou le propriétaire lui-même appelé et a signalé l'odeur de torture de cadavre Aucune odeur n'a été vraiment trouvée par les flics Je suis tellement fatigué Je ne peux pas jouer avec moi, je veux juste quitter cet endroit |
French | Je me suis arrangé quand je suis déjà à l'hôpital pour iv drogue utilisé un putain de stupide ingrat mensonger de merde je suis à l'hôpital depuis des semaines à cause d'une infection j'ai injecté des drogues j'ai causé des années de souffrance émotionnellement et financièrement j'ai eu l'idée brillante de m'asseoir dans ma chaise d'hôpital avec un peu de méthamphétamine et de fentanyl et de m'injecter tout en même |
English | If this was my last year of living what would you suggest me to try something exotic etc |
English | Hotline called cops on me So around week ago I contacted the hotline saying I had a plan to kill my self tomorrow and how I was going to do it after talking with her for hours without my notice she called the police on me This gave everyone in my house a shock especially when the police said they were investigating a suicide Eventually this leads to me being evaluated at a hospital which I lie to them about basically every question they ask me I constantly denied that it was me who said they were suicidal even though they had some sort of solid proof So after lying through an evaluation I m discharged Easy as right Well thing is I'm still suicidal and looking at a bunch of pills that I just want to fucking chug right now Pretty stuck and it s am DK what to do I also don't trust the hotline right now as they might pull the same shit on me so here I am |
French | J'ai essayé de mettre fin à tout cela sur le st je me sens si coupable Encore plus pour ne pas en passer par là, je suis si fatigué et si seul que j'ai toujours ma note que je ne peux pas sembler jeter je continue à penser que je vais en avoir besoin un jour bientôt j'ai trop peur de vivre trop peur de mourir et je me déteste pour ça j'ai tout perdu encore et encore mais pas comme ça |
French | En colère m juste très en colère je n'ai jamais été une personne en colère j'ai toujours été triste et déprimée mais je me rends compte maintenant à quel point je suis en colère et à quel point j'ai peur de tourner ma colère sur moi-même je suis en colère contre mes médecins je suis en colère contre la façon dont j'ai été traité comme un animal à l'hôpital je suis en colère contre les gens qui m'ont blessé |
French | Je pensais que j'étais prêt à me suicider J'ai pris un bain chaud Je me suis coupé le poignet gauche et j'avais l'intention de saigner J'ai pensé que c'était assez esthétique J'ai commencé à regarder l'eau J'ai commencé à couler du sang J'ai commencé à avoir peur J'ai peur Je suis un athée J'accepte qu'il n'y ait rien après la mort J'ai peur |
French | Depuis quelques jours, je visualise ma mort et ce qui se passe après, et d'une manière ou d'une autre, cela me donne un sentiment de paix et de bonheur. |
English | His feel really sad right now anybody up |
English | Nothing works anymore The worst part of being an emotional wreck in high school is that no one cares about you, It's worse when people start making fun of you for it My mom always tells me to focus on thinking about the good things in life and not the bad things It's funny because evolution made sure that more traumatizing memories stick better because they warn us better from potential danger The memory of my mom angrily throwing her wooden chair at me while I cry outside her room or my dad beating me up with a cane until I bled because I didn't want to go shopping with him was always going to be more striking than what my mom made me for breakfast on a certain day I love my parents and are grateful that they are around because they provided me with so much and worked so hard to get to where they are today but I never really have an emotional attachment to them in the same way that other kids have with their parents After all it's hard to really love your parents when they beat you up for watching a cartoon they don't like or not finishing vegetables They even locked my brother in the attic once It's worse when they don't know about what's actually going on with me, They always thought that whatever I am going through is just a phase or just me acting up or me being sad They always tell me to think more positively or be grateful that you're alive or better off than other people As if telling people with the flu to just be less sick is effective My mom even lectured me about how I should think about my parents first and then myself second because I owe them a lot for being born into this world I understand that I should be grateful for them and I am grateful for them but hearing this just makes me feel a little nauseous inside The most traumatizing memory I have is that of my mom pretending to jump out of my bedroom window She was mad that I wouldn't open up to her and let her know what is going on with me, I didn't want to talk to her because I didn't really trust my parents with anything since I knew they were going to use it against me one way or another When my mom got mad she started shouting and soon enough she was walking over to the window and trying to open it I was sobbing silently before all this happened the sight of her doing that led to me trying to muster out a feeble please stop mom please don't go i m sorry and then when she walked away from the window my legs dragged me out of my room as fast as possible while tears started to roll I sat in the closet and cried in the dark but I didn't cry like I normally did I would usually sob and sniff but this time I was yelling and breathing like a year-old throwing a tantrum I couldn't help it My mom eventually assured me that she was only testing me which made me feel worse and my dad told me that he'd listen if I ever needed someone to talk to I couldn't rely on them no matter how much I wanted to because of all those memories They also seemed to forget about what I am going through as when I was feeling rough yesterday my mom yelled at me for not talking to her and brought my dad in who told me that I should listen to my mother Friends don't help either I am the type of person who can't live without meaningful relationships with other people but it's hard to do that when I don't know most of the people here when they were younger since I am new to this town I know a lot of people yes but they don't really care much about me Seeing them enjoying themselves and being so comfortable with each other made me feel like being shot at It was hurting me That's why I deleted Instagram recently but that only made me feel worse I only talk to a few people and I'm pretty sure that they're annoyed at me or getting annoyed I don't really wanna talk about any of my other problems here I want to get into the ways I tried solving them Yes I tried therapy It didn't work My GP referred me to a psychiatrist who was a genuinely nice person and did help me for a while but we only had sessions once a month, and it was too expensive for us After a few months I didn't get better, and we just stopped There's a lady at my school who tries and makes sure we feel good at school but she didn't help me improve my condition despite several referrals by my teacher I talked about my problems with some people who would care but it's not helping I'm too scared to try any creative outlet for my problems because I'm a perfectionist and whenever I do something it's always not good enough for my own standards and I fall into this cycle of self loathing and criticism If we're all ending up at the same destination anyway then what's the point |
French | Est-ce que quelqu'un connaît une ligne de sauvetage internationale de prévention du suicide qui est disponible pour le texte Je vis dans un pays d'Asie du Sud-Est de sorte que les lignes de prévention du suicide sont difficiles à atteindre et même si je ne suis pas à l'aise d'avoir à parler au téléphone, j'ai essayé de texter la ligne de sauvetage de mon pays, mais ils ne répondent pas |
English | I'm the biggest loser I know years old live with mother who is ill dead end job can't drive no money no skills no qualifications stupid no motivation no attention span lazy worthless What is the point in living when my life is like this I am a loser inherently and by execution The worst part is I have a girlfriend who lives me very much We met in a different country a few years ago when I spent up an inheritance and pretended to her, I have a better life We have been together several times since, but she lives in a different country We speak to each other every day, and she has been completely devoted to me, and she is pain being apart from me, She wants to come for me and has been trying to get a visa, but I can't make it work I have lied to her about pretty much everything in the first paragraph except my age I have been trying to stall things but I've ran out of excuses The truth is just too painful to tell her She is the only thing keeping me going, and she has said if I leave her she would kill herself I am a coward, but this has gone on too long and the consequences of the truth being revealed seem very severe If I could just die this miserable existence would be over |
French | null |
English | what's the point I'm this is my last week of senior year and I don't think that I can graduate with my poor grades I went to the same school for most of my life and I had to transfer from a VERY graduating senior class of about small school to a large one graduating class is about It s been very hard and stressful and I've received no help at all and I have no idea who to ask for help and my anxiety prevents me from actually seeking it My mental state has been deteriorating since middle school I used to not feel depressed as often but at this point I'm depressed and cry everyday I've tried to kill myself multiple times in and I've already attempted once this year I have horrible paranoia to the point that I can't sleep at night most of the time and delusions that there's a demon inside of me and that everyone is attempting to kill me or is out to make me struggle I struggle with bad intrusive thoughts of hurting people for no reason with no trigger besides that I get angry sometimes but usually it's unprompted I'm really worried about my boyfriend he struggles with a lot of issues that I have but I'm so worthless I can't even help him I feel like such a burden He supports me and is basically my strength to get out of bed My mother finally put me with a therapist last year and I even have an appointment for a medicine review coming However it feels like at this point I'm a total failure because I'm going to fail senior year and my family already hates me and berates me enough My mom might be understanding but she's going to be disappointed, and I feel like it's going to kill me It just feels so hopeless It feels like the only way I can repent for everything that I am is to kill myself |
French | Se faire dire que le suicide est la chose la plus égoïste que vous puissiez faire est des conneries Maintenir cette existence douloureuse juste pour que vous n'ayez pas à me manquer est égoïste. |
English | Alone am I feeling really alone I barely know what to write but I'm just gonna start to get the thoughts flowing I can't seem to keep it to myself any more I have no friends at all to talk to, so I am here I am year old girl I feel about right now I have a sister who is years younger than me my mom and my husband who is Right now I'm visiting my home my husband and I live in a different country I came home for a while because I really missed everyone, and it brought back so much hurt for some reason I love my sister and my mom, but I feel excluded by them, I have always felt this way really She is spoiled like to imagine a kid asks for anything they want, and she gets two She doesn't care about spending time with her family or anything other than clothes and phones and dumb material things I don't know anyway I get haunting thoughts of suicide every single day Every day I say to my self I know I'm going to kill myself just when What day will I muster the courage and just do it already I hope it will be soon I think about it and I just consider it a good thing I barely sleep maybe hours a day, so I am always tired I feel like if I kill myself I'll finally get some much-needed rest I also think about taking all my belongings and just burning them before I die so it was almost like I never really existed That brings a smile to my face If I die I have no friends to miss me and a family who forgets me easily The only person who might care is my husband He thinks I'm a big bitch though He has said it to me mostly because I am detached from life and I try to keep him satisfied with all the love I can conjure, but I don't think it's enough for him, I am too empty so he finds me boring I don't know what I can do I don't have medical anymore so I can't even go to a doctor without breaking the bank anyway I'm rambling I just want someone to care or listen to me, I just need a friend or something If anyone wants to know more or share anything with me, so I can just talk to anyone that d be cool bye |
French | Quelle est la façon la plus indolore de vous tuer, je pensais que peut-être les pilules avec de l'alcool serait la façon la plus indolore de me tuer, mais peut-être que si je me coupe les veines, je vais m'évanouir et mourir plus vite Opinions |
French | Peut-être que ma dernière semaine de merde est si mauvaise que je ne peux pas prendre et je n'ai personne pour parler à mon meilleur ami s'est tué il y a des années et être tellement plus vieux maintenant que tout le monde a évolué dans sa vie et je n'ai personne à qui je peux vraiment parler ou est dans la même situation que moi. |
French | Je suis tellement dans la douleur que je n'ai personne pour parler à mes amis sont malades de ma merde à ce stade personne IRL écouter sim dans tant de douleur et je veux juste qu'il fin dieu aidez-moi je sais que je viens à la fin |
French | Fuck ITN point en essayant plus |
French | Transgenre boulimique apathique et faux comme merde, je suis invalide essayé tant de fois avant, mais je n'abandonne pas ce soir pour écrire ma note de suicide et passer ce soir |
French | Je ne vois pas d'avenir pour moi Je ne trouverai jamais un emploi Je ne suis pas qualifié pour quoi que ce soit Je suis blessé Je suis une fille de 16 ans Je suis une fille lesbienne Je suis déprimée Je suis déprimée Je suis déprimée Je suis déprimée Je suis déprimée Je suis déprimée Je suis déprimée Je suis déprimée Je suis déprimée Je suis déprimée Je suis déprimée Je suis déprimée Je suis déprimée Je suis déprimée Je suis déprimée |
French | Pas d'amis Pas de famille Pas de jeu d'amour Juste un peu plus longtemps et je suis parti |
French | C'est ma vie n'est-ce pas j'ai parlé à d'autres de mes sentiments suicidaires récemment et quelque chose qui me dérange est que les réponses ne peuvent presque toutes être résumées par la phrase Vous n'avez pas le droit de vous tuer Pourquoi je peux choisir n'importe quel nombre de dépendances légales et je suis dans mes droits Je peux choisir n'importe quel nombre de façons de me ruiner financièrement et je suis dans mes droits |
English | Struggling to find a reason to hang on At this point I feel ready to just throw in the towel and overdose on a drug cocktail I feel like I've lost everything I got broken up with and even though he still wants to be friends I can't get over my feelings But I fear not having him around in my life cause of how much he means to me But, yet I want someone to hold me and cuddle with me and make me feel good physically I feel like I'll never get that again from anyone else Not only was he perfect but he only stopped loving me cause of my Borderline Personality Disorder meltdowns and rages I'd have Not to mention the fact that he broke up with me once in November and then got back together with me only to later say he regretted doing so and felt it was more of an impulse There's also school After missing out on qualifying for my major by one point I'm stuck taking a bunch of electives and three day a week classes I don't care for until my GPA gets brought up And then there's work While everything else for me ought to be changing work is still shitty as ever And I'm about to be double fucked Because of my work schedule my only days off are Tuesday and Wednesday Except I have classes on those days AO no matter what day it is I have some shitty obligation that s going to take up most of my time I have no time for friends video games I don't even have time to watch movies something I love to do and is what I want a career in because I'm too busy focusing on other things that force my time I don't even have time to find a new person to love because I'll be too busy with school and work so It'll be miserable loneliness for me AAAAA So what I ask is there even a reason for me to care anymore To keep going Cause right now I'm not seeing it When your best friend says they'd be fine if you decided to leave them it doesn't do a great job of convincing you that you have a ton of meaning to that person My life over the past few months has been hell and I just want it to end At this point why go on with the struggle Oh and before all you thirsty nice guys say how you'd treat me right let me just say I'm a guy as well SP don't even bother I want actual people to talk to not someone who cares more about his cock than a persons well-being |
English | Please help Meir anyone out there could help I'd really appreciate it |