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[deleted] | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_2zqpyn | my boyfriend started out as romantic, sweet, and caring. Swept me off my feet. I ignored a few red flags because we both like to drink and I figured his behavior was just due to crankiness, or drinking. However, his occasional jerk tendencies turned into outright.... Don't want to call it abuse, but it's not not abuse. Name calling, abrupt personality shifts, belittling.
Most recent Example: pregnancy scare. He is aloof, dismissive and flippant. Blows me off three nights in a row but after blowing me off, texts me or calls at midnight (after blowing me off because he has important stuff to do) for me to come over. Still not addressing my nervousness about pregnancy. Third night he blows me off, texts me at midnight: you can come over. Then he calls and tells me to bring my puppy and ice cream. Hangs up. I call him back and tell him that if he wants to see me he needs to make plans with me, I'm not a booty call, and when he does this he makes me feel like shit about myself. He hangs up. I call him back and he tells me that I need to stop acting like a kid. When I ask him how I'm acting like a kid, he calls me a psycho bitch and tells me to leAve him alone.
Now, obviously I am leaving. But he keeps frequenting the bar that we used to go to, which is right near my house and a block away from my work. I used to work there, I am friends with all the bartenders, and the only people he knows there he met through me. It is nowhere near where he lives or goes to school.
Since the night I just described, he has only called me after midnight, 3 or 4 times each night, but no apology or anything during the day. I haven't answered.
My question is, beyond asking him to respect my space ( which he won't) how much information is appropriate to give to the bartenders and friends that know us both? I don't want to cause drama. But because he is such a "nice" guy to everybody else, I feel lpretty isolated. I have told one of the bartenders who I am close with, but I don't know what to say to people.
"Hey, boyfriend has acted inappropriately and I have asked him not to come to this bar. Please don't be friendly."
I don't know. I guess my question is, how much is too much? Is it ok to say anything? I just want to be able to feel safe and have a drink after work without running into him. I am also extremely depressed and stressed and don't know how to communicate it.
** | jerk ex boyfriend won't stay away from my neighborhood bar, what can I say to the bartenders/friends that go there? |
[deleted] | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_2zu13h | the other day i told him I didn't want to go anywhere with him because I didn't feel like being used bc it seems like he's only interested in me when I'll make out or do sexual things with him.
I regretted it after i said t, even though it's how i feel. Has he taken me out? Twice...to the movies. But he would touch my leg during the movie and bring up how we had plans to do it in a hotel in the future.
I slept with him a week ago, which i regret because i didnt see or hear from him until 2 days after. It obviously didnt register as a big deal to him.
But what's hurting me the most is the fact that he didnt deny it after i told him how i felt about being used. He acted offended and said he was surprised to hear me say something like that.
I dont have a lot of friends right now and over the past couple of months he has become a big part of my life. How i feel is very complicated: for one, i feel hurt, but i also feel like i need closure and at the same time icant stop thinking about him.
He hasnt tried texting or calling me, and i keep wanting to bump into him, but at the same time im upset with him and i want to forget him and move on with my life.
** | how do you move on from a guy you like but dont like anymore, who's no good for you but you can't get him off your mind, who seems to not really care, when you feel like you need closure? :( |
[deleted] | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_2zubvb | Okay. I've been in a very rough mindset for the last week or so. I'm really hoping I can get some solid advice here. I don't want any tricks or stupid pick up artist stuff, I just want a chance.
My girlfriend was married young, it lasted two years. He cheated on her and they separated for 6 months. I met my girlfriend at a wedding last fall, (she was the photographer and is friends with my friends who were getting married) we started talking after that, there was an instant spark that came through right away. Eventually she opened up to me and explained her situation. That she was separated from her husband but not divorced yet. She was filing for divorce however and the two had been "broken up" and apart for months and months at this point.
We kept talking but took it very slow because of the situation and because we actually lived states apart. Eventually in December the spark was too much to wait. (And by then the divorce was underway) she did a very rom-com move and drove 7 hours to nyc to stay with me a few days.
Those were the best days of my life so far. The connection was insane. I truly believe we fell in love that quick, in those few days.
After this we became boyfriend and girlfriend. We never went more than a week without seeing each other. We would take turns making the trips, we went on a romantic winter vacation together in a cottage, spent an amazing Valentine's day together and went to Harry potter world together in Florida for a week!
All of that sounds wonderful, and it was. But she has since pointed out to me what I tried to not notice. I have been an incredibly thoughtful and romantic boyfriend, she knows I love her and would never intentionally hurt her- but I have hurt her. I let past insecurities and heart breaks (been cheated on and dropped for ex boyfriends every relationship I have had) I realized it wasn't fair to start our relationship by projecting these thoughts onto her, we had talked about that and how she was working so hard to have her heart open wide for me and not let her failed marriage affect our relationship as she said what we have is different than she's ever felt. We both agreed we have taught each other that true love DOES exist and have never felt like this before.
Anyway, back to me ruining everything.
I would act moody and stand offish if she told me about a guy friend or her boss. I would ask her too many questions and basically make her feel bad for having friends. I even got mad when she told me she had dated a guy that was friend of a friend years and years ago...I don't know why but this still made me sad and I went in defense mode and we fought. That fight ruined the last night of her latest trip to see me in nyc. The next day before she left we were normal again (so I thougbt) and for the next week after she left things became really good again, in fact very passionate over long distance.
Then, the next week I noticed a change in her texts. We were a couple that texted constantly throughout the day, I would say we didn't need to do that if she was busy or whatever but she always made time and said she loved talking to me always. Anyway this changed. Less emojis. Colder texts. "I'm just so busy and frustrated with my business- I've put off so much work and I'm overwhelmed"
I asked point blank a couple times If there was more than that going on, If there was an issue with us. I did this calmly and just said it's important we communicate. She kept to her story that that wasn't the case but I couldn't shake the feeling.
I was right. Eventually after like a week of that she opened up first on a FaceTime call (then she started crying and ended the call) and then moved it to texting. (Ugh the worst)
She told me about how she couldn't shake the last fight we had and how it just brought to the surface all the times I made her feel bad for things she had done in the past or things she wasn't doing at all. We talked it out for a long time. I stayed calm but I was genuine and honest. I did t want to play any games and pretend she wasn't a big deal to me. Even if that's what the Internet says to do when you feel like you are about to get dumped.
I explained why I acted the way I did, I explained things we should've talked about in person prior to this- how bad my past relationships were, family issues, various things they explain why sometimes I'm a huge idiot.
I didn't blame her at all but wished she would've opened up about this from the very beginning so I could realize what I was doing and put a stop to it.
Another week has past. I gave her space but she would still send a few texts a day. We still said I love you at the end of the night. Up until two days ago, after discussing everything again I noticed she stopped the I love yous.
She hasn't completely broken up with me. I told her we owe it to ourselves to see each other in person and talk this out. I will be back in her state next week. I don't know what to do. I know space could help her forget the negative feelings and remember how good the good times are. I've tried to explain by her communicating she opened my eyes (she genuinely did) instead of being mad over this I am sad. Sad I did those stupid things and hurt her, I realized point blank for the first time the mistakes I made. I realize how petty they are and how I just want another chance with her. A fresh chance. Where I can prove I wont hurt her like that again, where we can build a stronger relationship.
She keeps saying "I'm trying so hard to open back up to you but I'm so scared" "I just don't know what to say because I don't know what to do" "I'm worried you will lash out next time you are mad and hurt me the same way" "Im trying but in having a hard time and I don't know why"
What do I do guys. I love her. I know she loves me. I just need the chance in person to prove it.
I at least need to see her to talk in person, it's been three weeks.
Oh by the way. I'm moving back to the state she lives in on Monday. So this is a horrible bummer of a way to start a new chapter (no I'm not movig back just to be wth her and no that didn't start these issues)
** | my girlfriend didn't communicate something was wrong and instead let it build up in her head every time I was acting like a jealous dick and is now worried I will keep hurting her and can't change. |
Wickedlonely | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_2ebjzs | I met this amazing girl while she was bar tending and she ended up giving me her number...the next weekend we went on a date and were inseparable for the next 3 years. I was 27 and she was 25 we fell hard for each other and fell in love with in 6 months. I was her best friend and she was mine.
After the first year we decided to move into together. I had a better job and no school loans plus great credit so I bought us a house. Things were going great we were talking about kids, looking at wedding venues and talking about how the rest of our lives would go.
She was part of my family. My sisters loved her and she would even go out and hang with my mother if I was busy. This girl was amazing. Yes she had a temper and threw tantrums. But I still loved her. I found out she was 130k in school loan debt so I would have to pay for the wedding myself and she wanted a 5k ring. This put a lot of stress on me and I gained 30 pounds from eating to hide stress. Plus working late hours and eating pizza at the office didn't help.
One weekend we went to a club and I left early to go let our dog out at the hotel. I passed out and when I woke she wasn't next to me. She chose to sleep next to her guy friend in the other room. This hurt a lot and turn my outlook about her. I ended up breaking up with her months later because I couldn't believe she did that.
We found her an apt I paid for her new couch,bed, TV, and TV stand because I thought we would just need some time apart. A week later I find out she is talking to her co worker and dating him. She tells me I am her past and I never made her happy. He is her future and to never contact her again.
It's been a year and I still miss this woman like crazy. I look at her Facebook and she pics of her n him. They look so happy and it's like I was never a part of her life. How can i forget about this woman. I gone to therapy, I work out, I have slept with well over 30 women in the last year and women want to date me but I always end up talking about her. How do I do what my x did and totally forget about that past life. Yes I still live in the house and have ownership of our dog. I almost killed myself because of the pain. I need help and my friends are sick of listening to me. I'm 31 and feel like I will never meet someone as amazing as her.
** | why can't I get over her? What can I do to not love her anymore?! |
am-I_famous-yet-mom | leagueoflegends | t5_2rfxx | t3_2ee14f | From observations 7 of my friends have had a huge improvement when they gained a better computer system which allowed them to have less ping and higher fps. The change seem to be instant I saw them rising through rank by 4-5 divisions in 1 1/2 weeks one even gained plat. I myself upgraded and actually being able to cope in teamfights since of constant high fps, (rather than it being dropped to 10-20) which made me do more for my team. It also seemed to smooth out mechanics well which helped in lane and fastere reaction times.
* | sometimes the system you play on (if you have a bad computer and only reach max 60fps) can cause you to not improve.
Edit: vocabulary and sentence structure |
drugsthrowaway99 | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_2eevl4 | Rant.
A couple years ago my ex broke off our 3 year relationship 3 weeks after my father died. Shitty timing but whatever. 3 weeks later she tells me she's seeing a girl.
This hurt. I hated her with a fiery passion and still do. It caused me to hate and distrust women for a long time. I experimented with men but they were mean too.
Months later my best friend od'd and died and that was it.
I decided all people do is use me, ignore me, hurt me or leave/die.
I stopped even wanting sex and even now I find it gross. Sex is just another way for people to use me. Right afterwards I feel used and ugly and gross even if it is a totally mutual thing with someone I like. I curl up in a ball and don't let them look at me
Everyone just seems so cruel and I hate it.
I hate myself and I've lead a life that a lot of people don't understand so I feel like I have to compartmentalize my life to the point I don't even know who I am anymore.
I want a nice, kind woman that I can slowly open up to but I don't know anymore.
I've been completely alone for years and it's starting to really mess with my life.
I just needed to get that off my chest.
Edit : | ex girlfriend broke my heart. I've got ptsd and intimacy issues. Everyone just seems to use me. Sex seems weird and gross. I'm lonely. |
Grumpypiglet | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_2ej6mp | Help me.
Me [21 F] and my boyfriend [24 M] have been together for almost a year. It's had its problems but was going well until friday. I'm at university which is where I met him which is about an hour from home, it being summer we haven't seen each other as much as normal so Friday I went up with the intention of stay for the week. At first everything was good and the night ended and I fell asleep around 1am, ATM 4.30 he wakes my up accusing me of cheating in him having just gone through my phone. I woke up confused obviously it was 4.30 and he is raging told me to get out that it was over.
Naturally I got my stuff and left, luckily we actually live down the same road and went to mine where he bombarded me with phone calls and texts and I kept repeating I hadn't cheated which I haven't!
Any way this went on and on I was so angry I got all his stuff he had left at mine over the months and took it all round there at around 5.15 am he let me in I gave him the stuff got the rest of my stuff and as I turns to leave he began to call me horrible names (lying bitch, cheating tart ect). So even though I now see it was wrong I slapped him (please don't judge me I know it was wrong). I left he turns up at my house ten minuets later gave me some clothes I forgot he gives me abuse I shout back I slam the door tell him I never want to see him again.
The next morning I decided to drive the hour back to my parents I was upset and didn't want to be alone. He rang me whilst I was on my way home and when I told him I had left he gave me more abuse down the phone. At this point can we bare in mind he broke up with me. So today and yesterday he has been texting and calling one minute all nice saying we can work through it even though I have explained to him that actually he has broken my trust by going through my phone and it's not about him supposedly being ok with what he believes I have done which I haven't.
Then he turns nasty and calls me a slut says he is going to get tested because I have probably given him something ect ect. But in the last couple hours he has been begging for me back and I don't know what to do.
On one hand I love him and want that but on the other hand I don't know if I can trust him, oh and he hasn't actually said he believes I have t cheated which is really getting my back up! I have never ever cheated on my boyfriend and this for me has come totally out of the blue. Do I take him back?
Help | he breached my trust, accused me of cheating made me feel crappy one minute he says he loves me and wants me back next im a alying cheat again help!! Do i get back together with him or not ?---
Edit - He went on to my notes and saw a list of people I had slept with yes I know childish immature to keep that but I made it when I was with the girls one day! Anyway I told him it was a certain number and when he went on it there was an additional person so he assumed that as there was one more on the list it must mean that I had slept with someone whilst we was together.
I hadn't , I actually forgot one when I told him my number at the beginning of the relationship and only made the list last month which is when I relished it was one more than I had told him!
I didn't tell him about it because he had already judge me for the amount I had slept with which really isn't a lot and no where near as many as him! I didn't want to cause a drama over noting so I kept quiet but he doesn't believe that.
Update - He just text me saying "I accept your version of events. I may have jumped to conclusions, or misread your reaction."
is it just me or does that seem like a huge copout? |
Flaxylatikan | relationship_advice | t5_2r0cn | t3_273hrv | The master bedroom is about twice the size of our room and is inhabited by the roommate A who has the apartment and all bills under her name. She is also the one who, when having her bf living with her divided bills by thirds because she said they would be the same amount even if he wasn't there. We found out January and I completely lost her trust; haven't talked to her.
Anyways,I have to put my desk in the living room because our desks (roommate B) don't fit in our small room.
She says we HAVE to pay equal amounts and she feels sorry that I feel she is robbing us of space. I am seriously considering just paying 400~ and leaving the rest to her but I know she will cry and be crazy. She cried when we confronted her about the bills and her secret. she threatened us by saying she'd move out. I don't know what to do but I'm almost sure I will not pay 453 for a dinky room while roommate A remains in a big room. She wants her way and I know it.
[ | one roommate of two is in master bedroom and expects us to pay equal thirds of rent. Our room is tiny! She only says she feels sorry if we feel we are being robbed of space but that she cannot pay all the amount when I can't either. I will be living with 55 dollars for all of June if I pay 453 by tomorrow. |
aliceness | relationship_advice | t5_2r0cn | t3_273nmk | I moved to London last year and moved in the day I arrived with a friend of mine [30/m] and his housemate [aforementioned 30/m] to their spare room. My friend has been great - he's not around much (he's a musician and tours a lot) and he's really relaxed about living arrangements. The other housemate, however, has been one frustrating moment after another.
When I first moved in, he broke up with his girlfriend of a year and started emotionally leaning on me, staying up late with me and having heart to hearts and making me really uncomfortable by asking if we could masturbate together and all the rest. I resisted because I found the whole thing really uncomfortable, and tried to tell him as such. He persisted several times over a few nights and even at one point suggested I have a threesome with him and his girlfriend after they got back together.
After I'd been living there for a while, I started noticing things of mine going missing -- toothpaste, shower gel, stuff I kept in the kitchen, etc. No one had ever said to me that we shared these things - I was under the understanding we shared cleaning products and toilet paper, and milk... but no one had ever told me anything else was communal. I wouldn't mind if it were actually communal, and I was allowed to use his stuff - but he never buys any, and when I have something in the house (like washing powder) he just stops buying his own and unless I remove it from the room or put it away somewhere, he continues to use it.
It would all be fine - if he ever apologised or offered me money. In addition, my alcohol has started going missing, and I'll frequently make us dinner or buy us alcohol and we'll have a night in but he never reciprocates because he spends his money on cocaine, weed, alcohol and tattoos. It's not my fault he doesn't budget properly, why should I be responsible for his irreponsibilities? He even recently flooded our bathroom because he got high and ran a bath and forgot he'd run it. Thankfully the house was mostly fine but it could have been a lot worse.
In addition, he takes it personally when I say I don't want to hang out. He gets moody and assumes I'm mad at him if I don't talk to him for a few days, asking if I'm angry at him. He doesn't seem to understand that my life doesn't revolve around my feelings towards him. It's nothing personal, it's just some nights I want to be on my own and chill out or sleep, and I'm usually his last resort when no one else wants to hang out with him.
Furthermore, he comes into my room when I'm out, because occasionally I've noticed things go missing - and my boyfriend sometimes stays in my room when I go to work and he's walked in on him before.
He denies it whenever I confront him about it, and continues to get annoyed with me for not emptying the bin or leaving the odd dirty dish around (even if I've cooked for him???!?) even though it's him in the house most days of the week (he works from home and I don't really use any other room but my room, the bathroom and maybe 1 day a week the kitchen).
I'm feeling really frustrated and I'd like to move out, but I can't afford to just at the moment. My boyfriend and I are talking about moving in together sometime next year, but in the meantime I probably need to deal with this in some way.
Can someone who's got experience with dealing with difficult housemates? I'd really like to confront this in a way that makes it clear how I'm feeling without him feeling like I'm attacking him.
edit: | my housemate is driving me crazy using my shit all the time and I want to discuss it with him calmly/rationally before I resort to moving out
Edit 2: Despite all original plans not to, my boyfriend and I have decided to move in together in the next three months, so I'm basically just going to keep myself to myself until that time and pray he continues to leave me the fuck alone! Thanks for all your words of advice and validating my fears, I really was worried I was being precious. It's good to know this isn't something I should be putting up with. :) |
sly101s | summonerschool | t5_2t9x3 | t3_275hvs | I was watching nightblue3's stream when he was playing kha. This game he got ahead. And was able to go elder lizard > last whisper directly. He said that since he was far enough ahead and had enough gold, last whisper was a better purchase then a brutalizer. This makes sense.
However, for his third damage item, he still picked up a black cleaver. And I'm wondering why. If he got a brutalizer early, that purchase makes sense. But since he didn't, wouldn't something like a bloodthirster or hydra been a better buy?
Maybe someone here knows LoL math. I'm guessing that once all 5 BC stacks are applied, you may do more damage than BT. But to get there, your BC damage has to ramp up with weaker auto attacks first. And by the time you get 5+ attacks on a target, they'd have likely already been dead with the BT. Plus, Kha wants more burst for those resets.
So | why would you build a BC on kha when you already have a LW + elder lizard, did not purchase a brutalizer, and have the gold to purchase a BT/Hydra outright for more flat AD? |
[deleted] | leagueoflegends | t5_2rfxx | t3_279r0b | I don't know how many times I've said this but here I go again.
Do you like having RP? Does being able to obtain that one skin for your favorite champ brighten up your day? Are you or someone you know a poor bastard like me who can't dump tons off cash onto your computer screen? WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE REWARDED FOR GOOD BEHAVIOR WITH RP? Well, then my friends I've pretty much solved this problem.
Let me be serious now. The only way you can get people to behave better is by showing them the benefits of having a good attitude. Riot has to give people a reason to act better. I'm sorry that's very unfortunate but it's true. I don't know if this new chat restriction thing is working I usually never talk to anyone in soloQ but if it's working, hey that's great. I'm sure it won't fix the problem entirely though. I've been trying to get this idea through were people can be rewarded for having good behavior with RP. Give some meaning to those honors after games. Players can receive RP over a period of time. It can be a small amount but after a while it'll stack. It's just a small incentive for people to stop being so toxic. Oh, also it rewards the players who have been putting up with everyone's bs for so long. Win/win for everyone. I know some people will say; "If Riot gives out free RP they will lose money." like I said before if you were reading, it can be a very small amount over time. If Riot is serious about fixing the community, then rewarding players with RP shouldn't bankrupt a company this big.
Nothing else in this patch matters, this has been | with Blaki...sorry his patch notes videos are just too good. But seriously Riot consider some kind of loyalty program. I think it can make a difference. |
[deleted] | leagueoflegends | t5_2rfxx | t3_27bs3p | I just had the honour of meeting the worst kind of person you could imagine in a videogame. Read the whole thing or you will think it's jsut some noob complaining about his bad teammates.
So here we go; game started really bad with our mid and jungle dying in a lvl 1. Vi died 2 more times before the five minute mark and ragequit. That sucked but it wasn't the bad part. Both our top and mid were heavily losing lanes, only botlane (me as adc and a thresh support) were doing quite well. Yasou got pretty pissed because we were like 2/11 about 8 minutes into the game with the only kills on our team being on me. Since out mid and top already lost heavily their malphite jungle decided to camp our botlane. Around 15 mins into the game yasou decided that he's done with this shit game, sold all his items, bought attack speed items only and just kept pushing lane until he died, over and over. That really sucked but that still wasn't the thing that made this game the worst experience I've ever had playing LoL. So malphite ganked bot pretty much everytime someone was in the lane. For some reason thresh didn't buy wards or sightstone tho. I asked him friendly if he could buy some wards after we alrdy died like 3 times to malphite ganks. His reply: 'that's why you're plat jinx'. ( He was d5..) So. zero wards unless i bought some, he didn't use his trinket either. That's the point where i kind of stopped enjoying the game because it was just 3-4 people dumping on me whenever i tried to farm or even get out of the base. Pretty damn furstrating right? So it was basically a 3v5 right now with insanely fed enemies. As we reached the 20 minute mark yasou started a surrender vote and both the tresh and akali top declined. Yasou got really mad at this point cursing etc. I curiously asked them why they wouldn't surrender given it's a 2.5v5 (akali was something like 0/8/0) they just spammed emotes and thresh said something like #believe. From that point on this game was jsut hell. Thresh and Akali did pretty much everything to stall out the game as long as possible but not trying to take any advantages to actually make us win the game. For example there was that one time where we somehow won a teamfight because the enemy team was just f***ing around, lost 1 person and killed all 5. It was around 35-40 minutes in at that time and we could have ended the game right there with me being a fairly fed jinx( I was the only person on the team who kept getting kills with ult etc.) but instead of pushing tower, getting inhib or even nexus they just stood in base spamming emotes or went to farm sidelanes or jungle. At this point I felt like they enjoyed being that 'troll' and making the game as bad as possible for the 2 other plays left on the team. The enemy team seemingly enjoyed killing everyone all the time and didn't attempt on closing anytime soon (not taking the free open inhib, not damaging turrets etc.) So I was trapped in this game with 1 afk, 1 guy running into turrets, afk pushing lanes and 2 people who tried to stall as hard as possible, occasionally saying things in all chat like: ' Can't carry this noob (insert temmate here). I didn't wanna leave the game for obvious reasons and it ended being an I think it was around 55 minute game that was discustingly exhausting. After the game they made some fun in the post game chat and that was it. I was pretty much 100% sure they're premade but i checked lolnexus and they're in the same ranked team aswell. I've never met guys like those 2 before and it was definately the worst experience I've ever had playing this game and I've seen all kinds of shit playing this game.
My english sucks I'm not a native speaker.
No | read the whole thing you lazy human being. |
[deleted] | relationship_advice | t5_2r0cn | t3_2nar0y | Here's the previous thread](
[Here's the original thread](
The police took a month to find time to see me. The inspector told me I was suspected of assault & battery on my wife's niece. I told her the whole story, as I've told it here. It was 5 pages of testimony and took us 2 hours. I only cried once, when I told them how lovely and sweet my kids were now, and how I didn't want their mother to hurt them ever again.
The inspector was very nice with me and explained carefully what I could do to get custody, and protect the kids. My wife cannot take them out of the country without my permission. She can move them to another home, as can I, unilaterally. She said my best bet is to prove that I'm a competent father, perhaps with school help, and that my wife is not a competent mother.
My wife is trying to be nice, she knows I'm being questioned and she's deathly scared (as far as a psychopath ever knows fear) of what I'm going to tell about her. She doesn't know I've already said enough (if the prosecutor and judges follow through) to put her away for several years.
Just to | the rap sheet: trafficking a minor; passport fraud (multiple counts); kidnapping of a minor; assault & battery on a minor; intimidation of witnesses; obstruction of justice; perjury. |
[deleted] | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_2ncwla | My sister in law used to be fat and she had weight loss surgery in Feb 2014. Ever since she lost weight she goes out drinking most nights and but always come home...though really late.
Over the weekend she didn't come home, my brother in law went crazy looking for her, turns out she left a bar with some guy and stayed at his house. She admitted to kissing and getting naked but no sex.
My brother in law posted on Facebook he was feeling betrayed so everyone assumed she did something since her attitude has changed since the weight loss. He even told us she is going drinking all the time because she never felt comfortable when she was fat.
They are married with 2 kids. My brother in law has done nothing but bash her to us but is now upset we don't want her to come for Thanksgiving. Do we have to accept her if he forgives her? What are our obligations? Is it really fair for him to share such intimate and disgusting details then expect us to go on like nothing happened?
** | brother in law told us details of wife acting like a whore and doesn't want us excluding her from family events. |
Happythrows | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_2nermm | my boyfriend and I have been together for six months. In a very bizarre turn of events unneeded to be explained here, we have spent the entire six months living together.
We Really love each other but at the moment we don't really have a lot of money. What money we have spare is spent on going out with our friends to the pub on weekends to have some fun and socialise, or put into savings for things we want.
When we are at home we cook together, watch a lot of movies and sometimes play games. We are saving up for a ps4, we really want to play multiplayer games together but we only have my PC and my Xbox controller for it recently broke so we've stopped playing games together and it's usually me playing solo games... While he plays on his laptop.
We also walk my dog together as something nice to do that doesn't cost anything and we have amazing scenery. We live in the UK.
My question is (I guess also | what else can we do while spending time together without much cost? We really are happy, but I want to be more inventive with our time and limited budget. I really want to make my man as happy as he makes me - I worry sometimes, as he treats me so well and I want to be much more creative for him. Any ideas?! |
[deleted] | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | t3_1mlt8i | Right, to begin i'm a quite an awkward person when it comes to guys, I've never had a bf, i'm a virgin and have only ever went on 2 dates in my life (which alot of people find surprising- i'm not hideous ha). I find it really difficult being flirty/telling people how i feel.
I have been talking to a guy through FB about a year (had seen him around town quite alot before started talking to him and always thought he was attractive). Since about 2 months ago we text nearly every day, despite never having actually met up. Last week he was out in town 5mins from where i live so casually just invited him over (just frustrated i had never met him and tbh didn't expect him to say yes).
I was shaking because of how nervous i was before he arrived. But the really strange thing for me was how easy and not awkward i found it. Just chatted for a couple of hours, having drinks then started making out and it started getting a bit heavy and I kind of blurted out that i was a virgin and didn't want to sleep with him considering i just met him. Instead everything else just went down (which is still completely out of character for me, yet i just felt comfortable- i know i had just met him but it didn't feel like he was a stranger since i had been speaking to him for so long).
He has been texting me, fb'in, snapchatting me everyday since but has not asked me to do anything /meet up with him and im too awkward to be the one to suggest it. Because this is annoying me i think i realise that i do like him. But tbh i have no idea what he thinks about me, bc he hasn't asked to do anything i'm assuming he's not too bothered about me but why would he be texting me every day like normal?
How do i find out if he likes me? (I know, i know "JUST ASK HIM", but i find it extremely difficult to be so direct).
[ | have been speaking to a guy who i had never met for a while, he came over to my place, everything but sex happened, he's still texting me everyday but i have no idea how to tell if he actually likes me]
don't actually know if my "problem" is worthy of a response lol just wanted to write it out to help me think. |
thrwawy11611 | relationship_advice | t5_2r0cn | t3_1mno8e | I'm 31m on my second marriage to 37f. I have 2 kids from first marriage I cannot see because of said ex-wife. Any time I try to be involved she causes huge fights, usually gets the cops or CPS involved and it just hurts my kids more and more, so I stepped away (this was advised by 3 attorneys as well.) Still doesn't make it right I know...
The mistake - married a woman who seemed like my soulmate after knowing her for 8 months, dating for 4 months.
The good - wife and I have a fairly good life; pay our bills, great sex life, enjoy each other's company, do almost everything together. Get along well with 2 of 3 step-kids, almost like my own kids.
Reasons for staying - I do love the woman, when things are good they are great, when they are bad they are suicidal bad. I am the only solid male her kids have had in their lives in the past 8 years, I hate to put them through another one of her episodes of depression and random guys in and out of thier lives.
The bad - i'm a jealous person, she had a male friend she had known for 5 or so years. They went from talking once a month (when we first married) to talking every 3 minutes through text (after about 9 months of marriage), went out twice a month for drinks and or a movie. The volume of text and them seeing each other lead me to believe they were having an affair, read the text and while 90% were innocent the 10% were not innocent at all and were all started by my wife. Blew a fuse and fight/forbidding occured and she lost her only friend. Obviously we have trust issues and she has a lot of resentment towards me.
She is a habitual liar, retells stories with details changing. I piece together the unfavorable truth eventually.
She is chronically depressed and will not get help or when she does will not follow the treatment correctly, so its pointless.
Every bad decision she makes is my fault. I didnt guide her or protect her from her mistakes.
I hate her son, he is a disgusting person and she acknowledges it but does nothing to help change it.
They are all complete slobs and do nothing without my instigating it to help mitigate the issues. Then she gets pissed at me for making her kids clean up after themselves. I work full time and some overtime, then have to come home and clean house, she gets mad at me for not sitting down and watching tv with her when cat litter is stinking up the whole house or dishes are over-flowing the sink.
I am in the worst financial shape of my entire life, all because of her spending habits and poor decisions. I take blame for not changing things but when you get yelled at for telling someone they spent all of the money, you eventually lose the will to fight. My debt amount increases while she insist on paying her debt off first. We have 0 savings due to said spending habits and her need to save every animal in the world, even if its a lost cause.
Our goals in life do not match. I want to start a business to pay off debt, save, and take vacations. She wants to quit her job, stay home and do nothing, and move to a major city alienating us from all friends and family. I have an amazing job with amazing benefits, she wants to torpedo this for a new location she will hate in 6 months. Whether its a job or a house, the current is always worse than the last, etc etc etc
There is no other person in this scenario, just a miserable husband with a miserable spouse. I want to focus on making myself happy for once and getting financial freedom.
I know the answer but can't pull the trigger, any suggestions on ways to make it work or suck it up and get a divorce?
Sorry if | getting my thoughts together for talking to a counselor by myself at some point. |
[deleted] | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_1mrd5x | My wife and I have been together for 13 years and for a few months now I have suspected she was having a long distance relationship, finally looked for and found proof confirming it 10 days ago.
Last Monday I found dirty texts, tons of nude pics, phone records, and voicemails confirming what I suspected. Once I asked her about it she denied everything and said I was crazy, then only admitted each think as I presented evidence. She said she wanted me and would break it off ASAP. Two days later she got busted again and did the same lying and denying, only admitting what I had proof of. Same thing happened on Sunday night. The most troubling things and the constant lies, that she told him she loves him, and that she said she wasn't telling me how she really feels until I'm across the country. One of her emails said once I'm gone the can finally meet.
What complicates things is that I'd already planned to move across the country, to establish our new home while she puts final touches on her masters thesis. I left Sunday night after busting her a 3rd time. She told me she loves me and just needs some time apart. That's hard for me to believe, based on her own words to the other guy. I told her that if she calls and lets me know that she has killed that other relationship completely and is truly committed to us, then we can start repairing things.
Since I left(3000 mile drive) she has called me every day to tell me she loves me and in have no idea how to react. I'm concerned that she's continuing that other relationship and is just going to string me along as her backup plan, in case that other thing doesn't work out. Not sure how I'll ever truly know until December.
Should I just move on and consider it over? I'm not sure how I can trust her, but I truly love her and want to find a way. If she strings me along for nothing it's going to hurt a lot, after already going through a lot of heartache already...but 13 years is a lot to give up on too easily. Need some advice from someone not so emotionally invested in the situation.
I'm trying to give as much detail as possible, but it's tough on a smartphone.
[ | wife busted cheating on me and lies every time she gets busted. Now I'm across the country and think I'm being kept on the back burner in case the other relationship doesn't work out.
UPDATE
Since its early on the west coast, I sent her a text that says "completely cut ALL ties with him by 5pm or I'm cutting all ties with you. Either we'll be working on our marriage or our new lives tonight". Thanks for the wide range of feedback Reddit. |
Latrodectian | leagueoflegends | t5_2rfxx | t3_3nieze | I've taken all the ward statistics from the match histories of each game played this week and ran some basic statistics on them.
Data:
Wards per minute
[Wards per match](
How to read: Each cell compares the player to other players in the same role . Green = maximum, red = minimum, yellow = median. So for instance, in the wards per minute table, iG KAKAO placed the least wards per minute of all junglers (cell is red), while KOO GorillA and EDG Meiko placed the most wards per minute of all supports (cells are green).
Observations:
Of supports, EDG Meiko placed the most wards per minute (1.519), followed by KOO GorrillA (1.513). However, the least prolific warder, BKT Moss, placed 0.875 wards per minute, a difference of less than a ward per minute.
Overall, KOO GorillA appears to be the most enthusiastic warder , with comparatively high per-minute numbers of wards placed, wards purchased, and pink wards purchased. Also, compared to his teammates, he destroys the most wards.
However, PNG Dioud destroyed the most wards per match (16.3) of all supports. That's 2 wards per match more than the next biggest ward destroyer (LDG Pyl at 14.3 wards destroyed per match).
TSM Lustboy and PNG Dioud purchased the most wards per minute of all supports. This likely means they bought Sightstone later than their compatriots, meaning they prioritize other items over it (a conclusion I'm drawing without consulting the item builds).
EDG PawN and EDG Deft out-warded their fellow mids and ADCs, respectively, at 0.743 and 0.295 wards per minute.
Most ADCs did not purchase stealth wards , meaning all their wards placed were trinkets. The exceptions were KT Arrow, LGD imp, EDG Deft, iG Kid, C9 Sneaky, and ahq AN.
Both per match and per minute, FW Maple places an average amount of wards but destroys more wards, buys more wards, and buys more pink wards, compared to other mids. (The discrepancy between ward placement and ward purchases is due to trinket ward use--it appears from these numbers, without consulting item builds, that he prioritizes Sweeping Lens.)
BKT as a whole appeared to lag behind most other teams in terms of ward numbers per match. Also, PNG brTT and EDG Clearlove don't seem to contribute much warding to their teams, preferring to let their teammates do so.
Notes:
The table colors exaggerate the differences between players, especially in the wards per minute data. Be careful.
Because Worlds matches are played on LAN and not a live server, they can't be queried using the public API. Thus more detailed ward information, like ward placement and timing, is not easily available; the only solution at the moment would be to carefully watch VODs and record each ward placement. (I tried doing this once--lasted about two minutes before I realized it sucked massively.) | no ward heatmaps for you :/
Trinkets are counted as wards placed. I don't believe (correct me if I'm wrong?) that the Rift Scuttler counts as a ward here.
FW Kkramer and FW NL are separated from the rest because they did not play all matches as their teammates did (Kkramer played one match, NL played two). Same with Easyhoon, but he wasn't subbed in this week.
I haven't run the same numbers for teams overall, players overall, roles overall, warding frequency within each team, etc., yet. I have the absolute ward numbers, but not in this rad format at the moment. Eventually I'll port everything to a google doc so you get to laugh at my inefficient spreadsheet techique.
Postscript:
I'm considering starting a subreddit for all analyses, posts, and articles using quantitative data in League of Legends--anything from Oracle's Elixir to gp10 to any of the occasional one-off studies that hit the front page. It would at least be a way to store all analyses in one place, as well as a discussion board for future areas of investigation. Trying to gauge interest--thoughts?
Edits : minor proofreading, trying for less wall-of-text. |
Throwawaybrother0128 | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_3nj4kg | After my mom died, my brother moved to another state far away with a friend. At first they both had jobs and were doing well. His friend got homesick and went back home. My brother was working two jobs and doing really well for a while. He moved to another state, bought a piece of land, and started living In a makeshift house with tarps and walls. He has no water or electricity. He does odd jobs, but doesn't have a stable job or income.
He kept having hopes his friend would come back and they'd start a business and get rich together. His friend kept promising him he'd come back and never did. After several years he finally realized that he is not coming back.
My brother has ran out of his savings. I make sure his phone has minutes and send him money to help out. He is looking for a job. How hard, I am not sure. It has been a month since I last sent him money and he hasn't found anything yet.
Now I do not think he is not finding a job because I send him money. It's not a lot and he knows I have my own bills. I really don't consider him a moocher. He has always helped me out in the past with money when he had it so I feel it more as repaying a favor.
I keep telling him to come move in with me or my dad but he refuses. He says he is staying and not leaving until he becomes successful. He still has dreams of getting a great job and getting rich. I really hate to say this but I don't see it happening. I think he needs family support, electricity, running water.
How do I get him to change his mind? He is absolutely refusing leaving. He says he will never quit.
Do I stop sending him money? I don't want to enable, but I also don't want him starving or in a bad situation.
How can I convince him to come home?
** | brother moved away, isn't succeeding, is stubborn, need advice. |
lordwolfjay | tifu | t5_2to41 | t3_3nld6u | So this happened a few months ago I was in junior ROTC and was getting a ride home from a friend's mom in her big redneck truck we arrived to my house I was so excited to get home I I open the door and get off my foot got stuck where u put your foot to get to on I fall down and my face hits the curb and my legs hit the curb and my right arm hits the lightpost I then shake it off I get inside my house and I check my phone and its all cracked and the touch screen did not want to work | tifu by falling off a truck breaking my nice expensive smart phone now I'm stuck with a crappy smart phone |
twoburritosupremesir | tifu | t5_2to41 | t3_3x8nxr | So like usual this happened about a year ago and not today.
So i woke up it was a normal day. Woke up took a shower and was ready to drive to school. I step out on the back deck and decided I wasn't going to wait to take a piss, why not I live in the country and no one will see me. So I unzip, unleash the mighty wizard and start to drain his power. It just so happened that my parents had scheduled our fence to be built in the early morning before they went to work. So as I was pissing on the fence repair man he yelled and I immediately looked straight down into his eyes. He went from my dick to my eyes at least 3 times before we shared a 10 second stare down. I tried to act like nothing happened and started to waddle back into the house with my pants still unzipped and my bladder half full.
I didn't go to school that day I was terrified to even come out of my room. At least he didn't charge extra for the bath...
New rule never piss anywhere but the toilet or be prepared to face the consequences.
Edit: Also, | asserted my dominance over repair man., Thanks badsinner. |
Mathieson1 | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_341npz | So I kinda had a crush on her at one point and so I texted her "hey" and then I get a phonecall about 3 minutes after sending the message. He just asks who it is and I say my name and he says "well your number keeps poping up on my girlfriends phone so what's going on". I'm really freaked out by this point since I hate confrontation and I say we are friends and not to worry. He says ok and tells me to have a nice day and hangs up. She then texted me "Hey sorry lol". So what should I do. I'm on mobile so sorry for punctuation | girl's scary boyfriend phoned me what do I do |
[deleted] | relationship_advice | t5_2r0cn | t3_1rxg49 | I've been seeing this guy for almost a year now, and it's been wonderful. We have so much in common, we make each other laugh, I've never not enjoyed hanging out with him and on the rare occasions that we do argue, we both discuss things like rational, calm adults. I've never been in a relationship that works this well and it's so refreshing!
That being said, I feel like it's getting to the point where either it becomes more serious or we end it. We've both exchanged the 'I love you's'--not a sentiment that either of us takes lightly--and I would very much like to make it something more official. Nothing would change. I would only ask that we see each other a little more often, or maybe go out on some real dates every once in a while. Or, smallest of things, be able to put up pictures on Facebook without either of us getting uncomfortable about the labels it implies.
He's afraid that he will neglect other parts of his life for me. I've insisted that I wouldn't let him, as I've got my own life and goals and love him as he is--friends, busy schedule and all. He's also had some horrible relationships in the past and I think he's projecting some of those onto what we've got. So, he would rather keep it this casual, unnamed, under-the-table thing.
So I told him I would have to end it, for my own wellness. I really do love him and have for a while, but if there's no future for us then I don't want to be any more emotionally invested. I see it as either we're heartbroken now or we're heartbroken in a year of more stagnation. He himself said that if he wasn't making me happy, then he'd rather see me off finding a relationship with someone who did and to not 'wait for him' if I wanted more. (though he does have a sort of martyr syndrome, so I brushed that off)
Well, that resulted in lots of tears and horribleness on both sides. Neither of us wants to end it. I asked him what future he saw if not a relationship and he sort of darted around the question before mumbling something about not being able to answer that until after more time and maybe living together so we can see if we really can stand each other.
That's the part that froze me. And it's the part that confused me so much that I came to the internet for advice. He doesn't want to move on, but he sees something down the line that's really very... I dunno. Official. The evening ended with us coming to the conclusion that we would still see each other, but maybe cut out the more intimate bits. I dunno. We're going out on Thursday, so I suppose that'll test how we do. It's funny, since all this happened, he's actually made more effort to see me more often and be more a part of my day.
So, my | and my question: He says he doesn't want a relationship, but he doesn't want to end what we have and he sees something more down the line. Is it unfair of me to demand something? Would it be healthier all around to end it? Should we keep on the way we are and bring the issue up again after another year? I've never had a healthy relationship before, so I'm unsure how to proceed without fucking anyone over. :/ |
OmegaForward | sex | t5_2qh3p | t3_1s0oor | It strikes me as so odd that M/F porn is mostly men having real orgasms and women having fake ones. Why do we just accept that as the norm now?
Those few and far between scenes where you know the woman orgasmed seem to me to be way hotter than most of what's out there. Even the fully-clothed "Hysterical Literature" is smoking hot and I've watched a few of them multiple times.
Heck, I'd be happy if the female performers just got visibly aroused. Browsing GoneWild shows us what horny girls really look like -- and it's not what we see in most porn.
So I know people will say "Homemade" is what you have to search for, but that's not really my question. I guess the | is, why can't women in porn come on-camera?
Edit: in case it wasn't clear, I am being deliberately ambiguous with the word can't. So, when I say "can't come on-camera" is it that women
a) are incapable of coming on camera? (but why can men?)
b) aren't asked to actually come on camera? (what, there's no time in the shoot for such foolishness?)
c) wouldn't sell more product if they came on camera? (why would this be?)
d) something else? |
DarkHorseRomeo | relationship_advice | t5_2r0cn | t3_1s0r6q | And no, it's not mine. She got pregnant while we were "taking a break". As bad as that sounds, it's true. She's immature, manipulative, and entirely unwilling to pick up the bucket and help carry water, unless it's her idea (and then it becomes "why aren't you carrying water faster?") I'm exhausted.
The worst part is, I allow it. She makes fun of me all the time in private and in front of people, degrading myself at my core. Standing up and bantering back with equally powerful snipes back at her is wearing me thin, I just don't have an endless capacity for teasing her back, which she says she loves. Asking her to stop gets you nowhere. If I had a magic wand, I'd have a girl who respected me and revered me, who stood with me against the challenges and hard work of creating a family and having a life, someone who would do anything for me as much as I do for her.
Unfortunately, I find myself faced with the "S" word, asking myself if I'm settling.
Her mother tore down her father in the same way, and after 30 years, he says nothing at all. He doesn't even open his mouth when his wife is around. At the Thanksgiving table, only bumping into him reminded us that he was there. He made the potatoes, the side dishes, helped with dinner prep. But silently.
When he is alone, he has opinions and ideas, but only when he's certain that his wife isn't around. I keep hearing this faint voice, "If you want to know what your wife will be like, look at her mother." Part of me wonders if this is somewhat unfair though.
Now I am deep in a relationship with this girl who learned from the best of them, we both get along well, we both have the same sense of humor, we both think somewhat alike - within the realm that "alike" means "in the same ballpark". But something feels horribly wrong. She's pregnant, out of her own carelessness, her own actions. I dumped her because of immature shit a few months before, and she started dating other guys, I was the only guy she had ever dated. And she promptly started sleeping with them.
Why did I go back? The next girl I dated was WORSE, and I made a snap decision. My ex was the lesser of the two evils. And pregnant, and scared. Now that I am back to carrying the water for her though, everything has gone back to how it used to be. God I'm stupid.
As it turns out, it's a girl, and the thought that thunderstruck me this weekend was - "Holy hell, I can't handle two of them. One is more than I can handle, realistically". When I bring up my needs being unmet, she pushes back with things that I get wrong, which is fair. But we're now at a point where I feel like I'm in the middle of a minefield, and not only do I not know where the mines are, they keep shifting in place underneath me.
Do I call a chopper and get airlifted the fuck out of here? I have so many reasons for and against staying or leaving, but the | question is, can someone unlearn a behavior? Can someone learn to change themselves without being encouraged from outside?
I keep telling her what's wrong, giving her the roadmap on how to make things work. Don't poke me, just be nice, I'm courteous, and I'm not very thick skinned. I'm an incredibly simple man, intelligent and thoughtful, but as impulsive and simple to please as a loyal puppy. No matter how many ways I come up with to describe exactly where things are breaking down with us, nothing changes, nothing really clicks in her brain that she has to wake up and put in effort to change herself.
Is it hopeless? |
antidempublicans | politics | t5_2cneq | t3_b6a96 | I troll here every now and then looking for random funny junk that is on the interwebs. (reddit has a decent collection..gj). But you have to admit a FAIR portion of the things on the general reddit homepage are politically related.
other than that, my point is this.
WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU SO GODDAMN DEMOCRAT!? I hate republicans and democrats for generally the same reason. I hate democrats more so because they tend to be extremely self-righteous, hypocrites, yes sometimes even MORE so than republicans. But the kicker is that they have their heads shoved so far up their ass they can't even see the sun! (in general...)
so WHYYYYY.....WHY!? is reddit continually and consistently pushing forth the view that "democrat" is supreme. When in fact, it is JUST AS EQUALLY BAD AND DETRIMENTAL TO A FUNCTIONING GOVERNMENT AS SHOUTING REPUBLICAN! Let alone having a valid argument!
I do not understand this. Reddit seems to praise itself over and over again and believe it is above everything...much like the government now thinks it is above even the law it is supposedly upholding! (let alone trying to rewrite!)
I just don't see why you consider this a "great" community, when it is in fact, not one as a majority.
Literally about .2% of the posts I see related to politics are actually intellectual and thought out, rather than "omg...you can't bash democrats and liberals here, because that's what reddit is" or "fuckin' look at this stupid republican". It makes NO BLOODY sense.
When having a TRUE political debate, I believe it is MUCH more beneficial to abstain from labeling oneself as belonging to a party, because that in itself confirms that you CANNOT and even more frighteningly WILL NOT and CHOOSE to not think for yourself!
so my question is this..."why (other than this IS afterall the internet) does this website consistently destroy itself and undermine its own potential as a considerable possible voice of the masses?"
( | labeling yourself as either democrat or republican is idiotic no matter how you look at it. If you want to have an intellectual and genuine argument/debate, drop your ego/stupidity and think for your own goddamn self = FUCK THE DEMOCRATS, FUCK THE REPUBLICANS and fuck you wannabe intellectuals)
pp.s Also, quit instantly labeling anyone who disagrees with you as a republican, cause chances are...THEY AREN'T. they are just SMARTER THAN YOU |
TheEllimist | relationship_advice | t5_2r0cn | t3_b6fg6 | What's the point? Do you really want people giving you advice if they couldn't be bothered to get up to speed on the entire situation you're in? And if they don't need all that information in the first place, why the hell are you bothering to include it?
Or it is just as I expect and I'm letting my overall hatred of | s cloud my judgement? |
WordyNinja | politics | t5_2cneq | t3_ba2zu | Hey Reddit,
I can't take it anymore. Pretty much everyday I come on here, there's some post up voted to the to the front page, whining about how horrible things (particularly in the U.S.) are, specially that [bitchy best of craigslist poster]( who needs to take the sand out of his vagina and grow up.
Get some perspective: right now, America is the most prosperous country during the most peaceful time in human history that there has ever been. Everyone likes to look back on the past with these rose tinted glasses and moan about “how bad things have gotten.” DO YOU EVEN KNOW HOW FUCKED UP THINGS USED TO BE? Seven years ago, there were laws in this country that regulated what sex acts consenting adults could or couldn’t do in the privacy of their own home. Less than thirty years ago, people were dying horrible painful deaths from an unknown disease and some politicians were actually debating that the government shouldn’t do anything because they got it from sex and intravenous drug use. Fifty years ago, there were places in this country that wouldn’t let you in the door because you were black. And just over ninety years ago, half the population couldn’t vote—because they had vaginas.
Fuck, even the recession isn’t the worst financial crisis. You should hear my grandmother talk about how when she was a little kid during the depression her family had to live in a traveling shantytown because the only job her college educated father could find was on a highway construction crew that moved throughout the state. Oh, and she lost two siblings to influenza…the fucking flu.
I’d rather have large multinational corporations manipulating world politics to their own fiscal advantage than the two only superpowers doing the same thing AND stockpiling nuclear arms for mutually assured destruction. Nuclear holocausts are bad for business—why do you think we’re not in an arms race with China? We buy their shit!
I’d rather have lying politicians and asshole talking heads finger pointing and blaming each other in this asinine two party Red State/Blue State system, than be a Rwandan woman getting gang raped after watching my husband and kids chopped to death with machetes by own countrymen.
And I’d rather pay taxes, then deal with Vikings sailing in every few years and stealing all my shit.
Am I saying that we should just accept things the way they are and be happy with what we have? No, of course not! Never settling is one of the traits that make Americans so resilient. But don’t make like Chicken Little every time there’s an issue and start screaming that the sky is falling. We live in a 24-hour news cycle; shit is ALWAYS going to be happening. And the media is going to go even more global, so soon you’ll hear about the latest crisis in India, Japan, or the U.K. everyday too. Just don’t panic about it. If there’s something you view as an injustice, than by all means work to correct. But understand that in the bigger picture of humanity, things are pretty good.
In closing (not that bullshit “ | this isn’t even 600 words, it won’t take you that long to get through): if you’re bitching on your computer about how unfair bullshit politics are and don't have to worry that the Nazis could kick in your door any minute and drag you off to a concentration camp, you have it pretty easy. Stop being an ass. |
Jalleyfish | wow | t5_2qio8 | t3_26shvt | Here's the background: I've been playing since WotLK. Through WotLK and Cata my primary spec was Resto, but I started playing Feral almost exclusively during MoP.
I'd like to jump back into healing but I'd like to know two things first. 1) what have been some of the key changes to Resto since Cata (patch notes are | for me) and 2) what is the best way to get geared back up at least to LFR.
Thanks for your help! |
ohsocleverhuh | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_386cb5 | My husband (23/M) has no sex drive, and I (21/F) have too much of it. He is always tired and we can go weeks without doing it and his excuse is he's always tired. I know he's not cheating and I seriously don't think he is, I just want some advice on how I can get through the fact that I feel so alone. We have been married for 2 years and I feel like we should be in that doing it multiple times a week phase rather than living like middle aged couple going through a crisis with our 15 year old kid...
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks in advance.
<b> | my husband won't have sex with me and its a real downer on my self-esteem. |
I_wanna_sleep_again | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_3gsr7x | I'm stuck... I really like her. We've know each other for a few years. Her parents know and like me and we recently really connected. She started having issues with her bf, and was talking about dumping him. I didn't push her one way or the other, even though I wanted to. Now they've decided to try and work it out.
All I want is for her to be happy...
bold | fallen for a girl I can't have... |
sad-broken | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_3gv6uo | My husband and I got together during high school and to this day have been each other's one and only relationship. We grew into adults in this world together, and have been through many highs and lows and milestones.
I hope this is the right place to post about this. I'm still quite new to Reddit but am in pretty desperate need to have another human being to use as a sounding board on these issues.
Out of everything we've been through, the biggest struggle we continue to have in our relationship is in matters of the bedroom. My husband has always had more sexual desire than me, and so I do my best to try to keep up. However, as of late I feel like things are getting a bit too much for me to handle and it's wearing me down.
Typically if I want my husband to be patient and understanding (basically, to treat me and anyone else he comes into contact with like a human being) I know that I will have to butter him up with sex to start the day. Well, a big home-cooked breakfast, then sex, and then our day can begin. Otherwise he will spend the entire day tensed up like an elastic band ready to snap, which leaves a palpable cloud of anger and negativity over the whole family.
Yesterday I decided I wanted to take the kids out for a picnic and to the museum. My husband is not really 'into' these sorts of family outings, especially for more than an hour or so, so I don't try to push it. I just wanted to have a relaxing day out so I called up my mother to see if she would accompany me and the kids instead. Before doing so, I made sure my husband had a good breakfast in him and gave him a bj before packing up the kids and heading on our way.
My husband is not too good being left on his own, so while I was out he ended up going over to enjoy some guy time with his dad, eating and watching movies. I watched some tv with my mother that night after she and I had fed and bathed the kids and gotten them both to bed.
By the time my husband got back, it was quite late and I was very ready for bed. I tried my best to make it clear that I wasn't in the mood to give him another bj that night because I'd had such a busy day. (Unfortunately for him my period started, so bjs.) Usually if I let him down gently like this he doesn't blow up and throw a huge fit. But he clearly had it set in his head that this is what he wanted and this is what must happen. That's when things started to get silly.
We were lying down in bed and after some vain attempts at groping me he turns on the tv and puts on one of the movies we had wanted to see. I'm like, "I can't watch all of this right now, it will be like 4am by the time it ends!" He turns off the tv and just glares up at the ceiling. I suggest we could just casually watch regular tv, but he snaps at me and says he's not in the mood to watch tv. And now, because I won't satisfy him, he won't be able to sleep tonight either. I am at a loss.
So we lie there in silence, him stewing in anger and me getting increasingly exhausted and frustrated by the minute. If I just stuffed his penis in my mouth this would all be over with and I could rest. But by that point I'm too upset that this ALWAYS has to be the way. He is always SO hyperfocused on getting to orgasm whenever he needs to that it is overtaking our relationship, our family life.. Everything! I am fed up with feeling like a hole for him to use whenever he pleases - regardless of whether I want to - and yet I still have to be slow and sensual, be on top, take control and act like I enjoy it even if I say I'm not in the mood! Seriously, fuck this.
In our relationship I do make a conscious effort to keep things working between us, specifically to try not to be as sexually 'broken' (defective) as he tells me I am, because I want him to be happy and feel like he is married to a desirable woman. But at this point I'm seriously running out of fucks to give. Sex in our relationship is not enjoyable, it feels more like an obligation, one that is slowly destroying me inside.
My husband ended up telling me to go sleep in bed with our youngest that night if I wasn't going to be using our marital bed for its intended purpose, and so I just left, hoping he'll use this as an opportunity to masterbate and move past this!
He proceeded to spend the next hour trashing the house, slamming doors, listening to a movie really loud, then coming into the room and hovering over me. He ripped the blanket off me and my (thankfully) sleeping son and said that "if I can't sleep neither can you." He eventually left and threw more things, then went back to his movie in the bedroom. I was starting to dose off when he came back and apologized to me and asked me to come back into the bedroom. I asked if he was sure about that just as he left to check on something. I still ended up falling asleep in bed with my son once things quieted down finally.
The | of this I guess would be:
I feel like a human orifice for my husband to pound as he sees fit. We have tried talking through these problems but it always boils down to me not having a decent enough sex drive and I need to put a bit more effort into it. What am I supposed to do?? |
myfirstpunksong | tifu | t5_2to41 | t3_3gxr4k | I had been wanting a nice DSLR camera for quite some time. Finally, after saving up for a month or two I begin searching my local Craigslist for cameras. I find one and quickly fall in love with it. I begin going out in the morning and evening and basically whenever I have free time. After about a week, I begin diving deeper into the hobby and realize I would love to go and shoot the night sky and stars. I learn that I need to buy a tripod to have a steady place to rest the camera for the longer exposures that night photography requires. I had already spent a good chunk of change on the camera, SD card, and strap and this point, so i figure I'll buy the cheapest option available from good ol' Walmart.
I find a black tripod with telescopic legs that extend about 4 feet. Perfect. So I go out and take some pictures of the stars. They turn out beautifully and I'm very happy. As I'm driving home I notice a beautiful church, with its silhouette crisply laid out against the early morning sky - a perfect photo opportunity.
I pull over and take out my gear and set up for my shot. I position the camera, and as I'm about to snap the photo, the camera falls to the ground and lands on the sidewalk with a heartbreaking thud. The top of the tripod had fallen off with the camera, too. I didn't even need to pick the camera up. I knew it was broken. I yelled my choice of expletives, picked up the camera and tripod and walked sullenly back to my car. I noticed a few churchgoers staring at me, which did not help. All the time spent learning how to use this thing, and all the money I had saved up were gone in a second, all because of my dumb decision to buy a cheap Walmart product.
( | decided to be cheap, destroyed camera.. don't use shitty wal-mart tripods) |
kanye_yeast478 | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_3gydvq | hung out with this girl for a while, had the courage to tell her I think she's cute because of all the mixed vibes I get, and she said she just wanted to be friends but we'll still hang out.
What I can't get over is that even after all that I still continue inconsistent vibes from her and it's really hard for me to move on cuz she's going to college and all that. I feel like I'm walking around through the day with a knife in my heart. Is there anyway I can reassure that she still wants to be friends after her telling me she just wanted to be friends like 3 weeks ago? Or is there another way I should go about this
** | is it wise to get reassurance from someone that they just wanna be friends? |
[deleted] | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_1wz24q | Prev post
Since my best friend cut me off the rest of the group stopped talking to me also with no explanation. It's been rough. These were my friends for years and not even a birthday msg from any of them nothing?
One of the girls (very fair skinned and blonde hair, she's known to be bitchy) actually sends constant snap chats to me of all of then hanging out and writes on them "leave you for a white girl" etc which I don't know if they are meant to be direct stabs at me? I got them constantly and I took it and just ignored it for months and months. I stopped even opening them among that was friendship posts with all of them tagged except me.. This has been really hard considering I really really honestly don't see how I did anything to deserve this much? I can see if I slept with her ex or killed her dog or crashed her car or even said something to offend her mum but I didn't do anything to her so why all this?
I don't know why but opening on of the snaps at a low point I think I snapped and I just sent one back saying "please stop being bitchy to me"
Boy did I get it back I got a snap after snap of them sticking their finger up at me (except for my ex best friend) and then I decided enough was enough so I msg the 'bitchy' one on fb and said
Keep in mind these are grown women lol
You's cut me off and you's wanted nothing to do with me and you's didn't really give me a reason and I didn't want that but you's wanted me to leave you alone so I did, so why are you's constantly provoking me? It's hard enough as it is. Just stop. Please.
To which I got back
Emma is the best she is way better then you will ever be she is amazing and wonderful and I never liked you to begin with
I replied, those are really nice things to say to someone.. If you never liked me why did u fake it for so long?
I got this back: I faked it for MY best friend now I we don't have time for this we are having too much fun hahahaha
That's when I just blocked them all off everything and tried to let it go they were being so childish and immature but even though they were it still hurt sooo much I can't even explain the anger I felt. Then I get a call from the guy I was seeing - my ex best friends goes and adds him
I know this might sound stupid to some I'm telling you I see how stupid it is but when you miss your best friend that much and your life isn't the same without the ppl you've built ur whole past with I just .. I just don't understand I really don't they were never like this before and never to me how do ppl change so much? Is it me or is it them ? I just can't understand will someone help me understand ?
** | cont after best friend cut me off |
SonicBoom16 | Fitness | t5_2qhx4 | t3_1wzqwl | I've been pretty good about setting goals and achieving them the past year. At 5'9, I've gone from 190 (~25% bf) and zero (real) strength training experience to a 3x275 squat, 5x320 deadlift, 225x4 bench, 145x4 OHP.
I know I can go further with these but at around 185 and 14%, I'm trying to cut down a bit further so I'm not eating above maintenance even on lifting days. I'm still making slow progress with deads and OHP, but my bench and squat have been stagnating for quite awhile. I'm totally fine with this and know that once I start eating more (can't wait) I can make some more forward progress.
But in the meanwhile, for the next two months or so, I'm looking for some sort of benchmark or challenge to reach. weighted dips/chins are out; with enough weight they inevitably start to wear on my elbows even though I try to be a form nazi. Also, I'm not looking to get huge or anything (strong and lean is what I"m going for) so I'm not interested in switching to a more hypertrophy-oriented program, nor am I particularly interested in Oly lifts. I couldn't give you a great reason why, but there it is.
So, long story short slash | what new exercises should I do, reddit? |
Ehralur | leagueoflegends | t5_2rfxx | t3_1x0cm8 | Lately I've seen tons of posts about people losing promotions to high elo players when their MMR is high but League is low and how this isn't working. People suggest they should be playing people of their own league for promotions and it proves that they dont understand the whole point of MMR.
The philosophy behind MMR is that it makes for fair games. How would u feel if you lose your promotion game because someone on the other team with Diamond MMR is in Silver like you but was forced to play his promotions with silvers?
Ofcourse there is always going to be a chance of smurfs playing at lower MMR, but the system minimizes this as much as possible. On the other hand losing your promo to gold 4 while playing diamonds might not seem fair, but its actually not as bad as you think.
Everyone playing promos has the same chance to win, because you play against players of your own MMR; however, if your MMR is higher than your league this will automatically be compensated by skipping divisions and higher LP gains. In the end MMR is all that matters, and ensures you will get to the league you belong as fast as possible, without negatively affecting other, while the league system gives players that arent racing through the ranks a sense of accomplishment. For instance Starcraft 2 didnt have this and consequently players slowly improving their skill would be stuck in a league for forever without knowing how close they would be to promoting to the next league.
wrote this on my phone. Will format and | later |
[deleted] | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_1x0ioo | My ex(f26) & I (m26) just got our of a rocky 2yr relationshit as I like to call it. As pretty much the title says. I just want those final things so I can let go, move on and let her rot with her new"man"plus they're my things! When I asked for my things back she started saying things like"you will get your stuff back when you pay me back what you owe me blah blah blah" | she thinks I owe her money for when she went to the hospital. any way not to get into details. I just needs advise on getting my things and moving the fuck on! |
FUDU1993 | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_1x249e | So 2 weeks ago my gf decided me and her needed to take a "break". I have her her space. Well after a week she txted me and broke up with me. She said she wasn't happy with me anymore. Her reasons for not being happy with me was because I wasn't manly enough and I was to gushy. She also thought I was cheating on her because she had been having dreams about me cheating (even though everytime I was with her she went through my phone my fb twitter everything). The final reason she broke up with me is because she said she was never satisfied in bed. (Yes her parents knew yes they were ok with it). But she told me she was never satisfied from our sex. But she would never tell me what she liked she was not verbal at all during sex. So how am I supposed to know want to do. Especially since she was my first.
She told me I would be happier with someone else. She told me she still loved me and wanted to be with me if I was different.
So now I'm just sitting here wondering what to do next. I need help. I mean I loved that girl and I want to be with her. Do I wait a while and see if she comes back? Do I try to move on into another relationship? I just need some advice. One thing I would like to do however is find a fwb not really to just have sex but so I can learn what to do. My ex told me I was good at what I did but I just never was able to satisfy her.
Any help or advice would be greatly welcomed. Thanks reddit I look forward to your answers.
** | gf broke up with me. Said I never satisfied her in bed. Looking for advice about what to do now and how to get better at sex. |
mauu5head | leagueoflegends | t5_2rfxx | t3_1x27z5 | Of the 50+ (Yes, I had to stop counting after 50...) UNIQUE (More or less) posts concerning Vel'koz, I got sick of reading the same theories over and over!
Give someone an idea and their creativity goes wild. lol
So
[Here's the simplest | of the OVER 50+ POSTS CONCERNING VEL'KOZ that I could do]( |
MissThrowsaway | TwoXChromosomes | t5_2r2jt | t3_1x67sz | Sorry for the wall of text ahead! I'm also sorry in advance if my language or grammar doesn't make sense at any point. English is not my first language.
So, for the past half year my BF & I have been really stressed out and just haven't had the energy or the time really to have lots of sex like we used to. We both understood that it wasn't loss of attraction to each other or anything of the sort, things were just hectic for the both of us and we were both okay with that and we continued to live together & love each other.
On to this man from my past. His name is James. James is about twice my age and I had met him online when I was only 16(I'm 22 now). I had just started reading the book Lolita at the time for a class & he told me "You can be my Lolita." I didn't read too much into that because I hadn't finished the book at this point. I liked him because he gave me all types of attention that I never got from boys my own age. We talked about life and school and issues I was having, like my problems with self-esteem, cutting and an eating disorder. We generally got along really well.
He eventually convinced me(after I refused a number of times)to agree that he was my 'boyfriend' and that I was his and only his. After that he asked me to send various photos to him (nude, undressing, etc) and I did, even when I didn't want to because he told me that this was what people who were dating did. He sent me photos of himself as well, but I could never bring myself to really look at them. I would immediately delete them and make something up about how I loved the photos. We had phone sex as well. This always ended up being him masturbating and making up how we were having sex and asking me if I liked it, while I sat on the other line saying "Yes." feeling disgusted with myself as he reached his climax. He would also tell me about how he wanted to have me drop everything where I lived and move in with him. He told me I would never have to get a job or anything, that he would pay for everything. I always thought this was him just kidding around. Eventually he told me he had payed for a plane ticket, a hotel room and rental car in the city I lived in. After this weekend he had planned out, he wanted me to leave with him. This absolutely frightened me. When I told him I wasn't going to meet with him and definitely was not leaving with him, he became furious and we stopped talking. I felt horrible that he'd spent his money already, but I was glad that it was over because I didn't know what other way to get out of this..whatever it was, with him.
Since then, he's contacted me sporadically and agreed to be 'friends'.
But each and every single time he has contacted me, he asks how I am, what I am doing. This is all fine and well, as most everyone does this, but when I read these texts I began to realize that he never actually acknowledges my answers, he just moves on to the next question. Then he starts becoming very sexual and eventually starts asking me for photos of myself again. At this point I always say no and he doesn't contact me again for some weeks or months even.
Well, he contacted me again just this past November. This time before he got to ask for photos, having been extremely stressed out at the time, I stupidly said to him "Why do you still talk to me, I'm fucked up and can't deal with this." He then told me "I like you because you're fucked up. (;" and after sending me a picture of his cum all over his hand, proceeded to tell me that he still has all the photos I ever sent him and that he looks at them all the time. I became extremely upset and ended the conversation with him.
Looking back on what we had back when I was 16 I realized that I was being used and that he never really cared for me. Just like in Lolita, he never saw me as my own person. He didn't think about what would happen to me as a result. He saw me as a fetish and reminded me constantly about the fact that I was underage and he was twice my age. He wanted me for sex and god only knows what he had in store for me if I had ever agreed to go with him.
After coming to terms with all this I just felt disgusted with myself. I got myself into all of this from the very beginning, I wanted attention from someone, I went along with it and I sent him photos of myself that I can never take back. I'm so ashamed of myself and I can't help but feel that I'm a big slut. This had been affecting me a lot lately and I'm at my lowest in terms of self-esteem. I can't stand for people to see me, so I haven't spent time with my friends in months & I spend all my time indoors playing games or reading when I'm not working or at school.
Recently my boyfriend & I both had been less stressed out about work and school so we decided that we would start having sex again this past week, but every single time he touches or talks dirty to me, I feel sick. Each time we've attempted to have sex I've asked him to stop. Last night I finally broke down about it, since we'd been trying each night and I told him everything about the whole situation. He held me and told me he loved me and understood and that we could try again whenever I'm ready. I'm very grateful to have such a wonderful boyfriend but I'm just at a huge loss for what to do now. How do I get past this? How do I fix it? I'm absolutely lost and don't know where else to go to help. Can anyone offer any insight on where to go from here?
I cannot | this, I'm sorry.
Edit: Thank you guys so much for your advice and kind words. I have a different phone number & I've blocked him from just about every way I think he could possibly contact me. I feel far more confident than I did earlier about this situation and am looking into getting help through some type of counseling and how to go about possibly reporting him. |
TinUser | leagueoflegends | t5_2rfxx | t3_2ifde5 | Note: This isn't a plea for higher level players to give us all their tips about the game, just on how to improve mechanically because we haven't yet figured out how to properly do so. You are in no way obligated to give your tips if you don't want to, this is purely an educational post for the greater good of lower level players to succeed in League of Legends.
I have a question pertaining to CS'ing. Not so much during laning phase, I can keep just under perfect CS fairly consistently. It's what happens after laning phase, roughly the 20 minute mark.
During LCS or watching higher level streamers, you can't help but notice that throughout the game they are maintaining very high CS no matter how late the game goes. They are always finding time to go back into lane, kill a couple waves, and regroup with the team.
My question is this: When is the proper time to leave the team to go farm outside of laning phase?
When laning phase ends, usually after I destroy their tower I roam to other lanes to help them, control objectives like Baron and Dragon and help push lanes to enemy tower for more global gold. But I just don't know when the proper time to leave the team to go back to my lane is.
Whenever I do leave the team to go farm, it seems like that's when the enemy capitalizes on the 4v5, wins a teamfight, and I get flamed in chat for farming during a fight.
Are there specific ways to make the lane always seem to be pushing towards you? Wouldn't you generally want all of your lanes pushing against the enemy turrets for increased map pressure?
If I ever play a game and I get anything over 300 cs, I feel like a God. Like holy shit look at my cs , yet this is a normal occurrence for a handful of higher level players.
I guess the main | of this post is just: where do you find time to farm as opposed to being with your team outside laning phase?
Thank you in advance to any and all Summoners looking to help out a fellow player. |
[deleted] | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_2in2ei | Original:
So I read the advice posted in the comments and I have to thank everyone for their input.
I talked to her the other day about my concerns. I started the conversation by saying that I really enjoyed playing DOTA with her and that its been a while since we played. She insisted by saying she knows but saying "normal games mean nothing to her and that mmr is more important. (Which makes me feel like shes a sociopath). " I didn't bring up the fact that I know she played with other friends, because I dont wanna seem that I am stalking her.
I then asked her about the "u needy fuck" comment and what ensued the most awkward conversation ever. I asked her that if something needed to be addressed and that if there is an issue it needs to be talked about so we can find a solution (so I can back down) She denies it at first and says that she wouldnt say that. It then evolved into me having an awkward pause and saying "...right" and her trying to play it off by flirting with me.
I asked her then when I would see her again and she just kept saying "I dunno" (shes really indecisive and i have to take lead on datea) which then nailed the coffin in the jar. It become really awkward with a realy long silence to which she tried to recover by giving me dates of when shes free. I pretty much said "well let me know free".
So at this point your like "hey setsailsahoy, why the fuck havent you told her off yet" and the answer is no fucking idea. Im very attractive a d have had chances with some famous people but I stick around for these internet girls because im a fucking retard.
Some other things happened today but I dont really want to get into it because I am fucking suicidal from work and I just want to be fucking sad and alone tonight.
Im going to have one last talk with her. I know it may seem like shes not interested but believe me I just think she has no idea how to be in a relationship. If my concerns get ignored again im bouncing.
** | talked to her about the issues pretends the thing that offended me didnt happen (because of how mean it was) now im fucking miserable from work and I dont want to deal with it.
Edit:typed all of this on my phone and fixednsome formatting |
[deleted] | relationship_advice | t5_2r0cn | t3_2g923s | Hi guys. I didn't know where else to go. I have been a geographic bachelor for a little over two months now, my wife works back in my home state (about 100 miles away). She recently told me she wanted space and that she was contemplating divorce.
I am rather concerned about finances and we had a weird relationship where I paid for the credit card and she helped where she could. I asked her to pay today, and she did what she could. I have to be honest, I bug her sometimes about finances and it gets on her nerves. I don't think she realizes how close we are each month on our bills. Either way, I came home to find an email (Yes, an email) telling me that she wanted to split up for good. She waxed on about still loving me and always having the good times to remember but that she had discovered what was truly important and what was worth fighting for. Truly, she resents me for getting out of the Army and getting my MBA on the GI Bill, while she herself has never been to college. She desperately wants to go but we can't afford it right now. I guess that's another story.
Well...for the last two hours I have been a big messy wreck. I truly love her and love being with her. She makes me happy. Over the last few months I could tell she had grown distant, but I thought it was because I was working elsewhere and things were just tough as we (I guess me mostly) tried to find time for each other.
My | is how do I get her to at least try to fix it before quitting? We have only been married for a little over a year. She doesn't seem to want to try counseling or anything. Should I be worried that she may be cheating?
Please let me know if you need more details or anything. I just need some help right now, none of my friends are around and its a shitty Friday night! Trying to stay occupied and not drink. |
hamoorftw | summonerschool | t5_2t9x3 | t3_2gabyz | Hello everyone. Here a question to experienced Diana main who tried many builds on her and played her top/mid/jungle. Anyone who went adventurous with her builds would chime in I will be grateful (:
So, Diana passive does really incredible amount of damage, even higher than most of her abilities at later stages. So I want to ask about three situational items. Nashor tooth, lich bane and wits end. Before I go any further about these items, I want to ask, is Diana a versatile champion when it comes to her builds? Can she adapt well in different situations and in different roles or is the abbysal+zhonia build the only way to play her ever?
So, the nashor, what do you guys think about it? Especially on Diana top/jungle. She can proc her passive way more often makes her a very deadly duelst in extended fights, sure she lose some burst, but she gain better sustained dps (especially with the %20 cdr where you can not only proc her passive more often due to the attack speed, but also can use the Q+R combo more often) plus her wave/camps clear become much faster which can be usuful on jungle Diana or split push top Diana.
Well now hold on for a minute because I know what you all thinking "but if you want a faster waveclear/split push champion you should be this or that!" True, but like I said, am talking about these three items in specific situations, am not intending to buy these in every Diana mid game where they might not be needed at all.
Secondly is the lich bane, I don't have much to say about it because I don't know how well it might work with her but if you have any experience with it then share it if you don't mind.
And last but not least is a weird choice, the wits end for Diana jungle/top. I tried it in a custom game as Diana jungle along with the nashor, her clearing became unbelievably fast! Hell, with spectral wraith, zhonia nashor and wits, I was able to solo baron really fast and done with him with %60 health!
So | nashor on mid/top/jungle. Lich bane on mid and wits end on jungle/ top Diana, what do you think about these items? Is there any diamond, challenger or pro players who build these items on their Diana?
Plus thoughts, feral flare+ spirit stone bruiser Diana, can it work? :p aaaaand thank you for reading |
Master_Cen | leagueoflegends | t5_2rfxx | t3_2galzt | The thing holding Garen back the most in late game is the ease to block his ultimate damage (Hexdrinker comes to mind which nullifies it completely as example).
His lackluster passive is finally looked into right now on the [PBE]( which aims to increase its usability over time, which is heavily needed! He isn't gonna utilize life steal a lot, nor is spell vamp a solid option for him.
Since i doubt that those are the only changes aimed for him, i want to suggest an old fan favorite, to further carve his niche of a tanky damage bruiser, which has problems getting into the enemy team, but once he manages to get to them, he utilizes abilities exclusively, which can (need to) be improved by critical strike chance.
His biggest issue is his ultime, which is nice in the early and early mid game (or as long as the enemy isn't effectively utilizing against it.), but it being magical damage and a solely from the enemy stats scaling finisher, all it ever requires is penetration. And this is what really holds Garen back in later skirmishes. His ultimate on his own won't really outdamage similar finishers by a large margin, but those usually can be itemized for by its respective champion, without going into exotic/stupid territory item wise.
Being able to get some damage buff to his E from bonus attack speed would be also needed, but that has been requested shortly ago. I will just briefly mention it here!
The | basically arrives now: Make his ultimate receive percentage penetration equal to Garen's critical strike chance, which has an increasing cap, based on the abilities level!
20/30/40% on Demacian Justice level 1/2/3, which is taken directly from his critical strike chance. He can still build more than that of course, but the ability won't use more than that!
Considering other finishers of similar champions, Garen has the best looking, but the overall weakest by far. So this wouldn't really brake him to a point where he becomes a stomping machine, don't worry. It is aimed to help his late game, which usually falls off hard, thanks to heavily restricted kit design decisions and lackluster itemization options. |
[deleted] | leagueoflegends | t5_2rfxx | t3_2gb020 | Recently(2weeks ago) i started with my channel on yt, ofc about league of legends, well i dont have many videos yet on it, but im posting funny videos, and outplays or how should i say.. Like at first i was very exited about it, and nervous, like i hoped i would get more than 200 views or smting.. Well i got a "little" more than that, which is nice, but does it rlly matters, i think that, what matters is the memories i have now, so every now and then i will be able to see what have i done, and laughed and so on... Yeah its all for fun, some of us also take LoL very serius, but i think since i've started posting videos, i enjoy playing more.
I hope its not too long, i suck at | tho xD |
ThereRDozensOfUz | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_2gfde0 | This is weird and I honestly never saw an issue with it. Long story short is that when Im at home, occasionally I'll sleep in the same bed as my mom. My parents have separate bedrooms and she kept the really comfortable (and certainly big enough for separate & private space for 2) mattress which she shares with her dog and sometimes me.
Im a mommas girl and I've always owned up to it. My dad has a gruff demeanor and while I love him, my mom and I bonded more easily. This habit started when I got my wisdom teeth taken out and she made me sleep with her so she could set alarms and administer medicine at night. It was comfortable, I like her dog, and I wake up earlier when she gets up for the day.
Anyway, this came up in passing and I thought it was funny but ny boyfriend put a brakes on the conversation and made me talk about it. "Wait what? Why do you do that?" Etc. He essentially thinks im now emotionally disturbed or like super immature or have daddy issues and untouchable. He used the words "red flag" and implied I was damaged goods. He was really weirded out by it and before we could talk about how ridiculous he was being about it, we just got quiet and he left my house, not in a storm but there was an uncomfortable tension and hed just say hed text me.
Now im pissed that hed act like im a pariah for doing something so innocuous and acting like its a red flag. Im hurt and annoyed and I dont think I did anything wrong and while Im a bit weird, its not a sign of some deepseated issues in me.
- | boyfriend called sleeping in same bed as my mom a red flag and left to reevaluate our relationship.
Is it seriously that uncomfortable for others that I do that? |
Wowforgotbday | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_2sw9fa | I don't give a shit about any gifts. Not for one second, I never have. It's just the fact that she guessed my birthday and it was wrong. I can't believe we've been together this long and she doesn't even know my birthday. I'm so heartbroken... What does this mean?
** | gf of 3 years forgot my birthday. |
[deleted] | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_2syx3l | So my boyfriend and I have been dating for three years, we are each-other's first serious relationship. We're pretty open with our phones so it isn't unusual for me to use his or vice versa, he didn't have a Facebook of Instagram until about a year ago so I noticed that when ever I try to search something on either one of those his ex fling (never official but kind of dated for like a year) ALWAYS pops up in recently searched.
He's very loyal, never has given me any indication that he would cheat and knows that we would be over if he did but I always wondered if he ever really got over her based on the way that he spoke of her.
I have already talked to him about how I understand that it's normal to be curious and check up on what ex's have been up to but I thought it was odd with how often he does. He got embarrassed and avoided the question.
Is this normal?
** | bf always checks his ex's Instagram and Facebook
Edit: sorry about the mistakes, I'm on my phone |
BestNANidalee | leagueoflegends | t5_2rfxx | t3_2t21xq | I apologize in advance for format issues, this is my first full fledged reddit post).
Let's face it: Bot Lane is so broken in gameplay, it's not even remotely fun, its closer to being a chore for both ADC and Support. Since the Bloodthirster Changes, almost ALL ADCs start 1 of the same 2 items: Trinity Force and Infinity Edge.
-Champions Guilty of this: ALL ADC'S!!
-Champions Guilty of IE rush: ALL ADC'S!! (They can all build IE first if they so wish)
-Champions Guilty of Tri-Force Rush: Corki/Ezreal/Lucian
(Keep in mind this is based on popular meta)
Since the power spikes come at different times, even if Trinity is finished at the same time for ADC 1 as IE would for ADC 2, the build paths are still so stale.
To further support this statement, I'll use the IE vs IE ADC build path match-up. It always seems, whichever ADC gets IE first, usually wins the lane, and there isn't much room for the other ADC to itemize efficiently, because he (or she) is already trying to build "meta item 1st IE". In other words, in every other lane, there is a way to build something different against your opponent while maintaining some sort of relevance; Zed has a completely different path than Yasuo, Maokai Top can build differently than Ryze (emphasis on CAN), Each jungler build is different every game. Hell, even a mirror match-up of Syndra vs Syndra has 2 different build paths, regardless of where they are in level or strength.
What I'm trying to stress is that: THERE IS NO ITEMIZATION/DIVERSITY FOR ADCS. AT ALL. THE ROLE IS STALE.
Now you can argue about match-ups where itemization does actually matter or shows diversity for ADCS. I'm looking at match-ups including any of these 4 champions: Lucian/Corki/Ezreal/Vayne. Since their power-spikes occur at different portions of the game based of their builds (for example; Corki's Mid Game Power Spike with Triforce, or Vayne's Late Game Scaling), you can see obvious signs of various build paths. But the problem that still remains is ADCs strength in relation to each other. And again, these are just 4 of many ADCs that have different builds from each other. Only 4. And in most cases, you'll commonly see a Lucian Building IE first as well, which can make the case for this argument only 3 ADCs.
( | there isn't enough item variation in the ADC role of Bot Lane compared to other roles in League of Legends, and it makes ADC the most stale role to play. |
hoodeddumborat | tifu | t5_2to41 | t3_2t3ykw | I'll provide a sentence of backstory so you don't all deem me a monstrosity but I'll keep it brief. I refused food when I was young and survived exclusively on milk, the calcium made my bones, teeth and nails freakishly strong and now at sixteen I still have three baby teeth.
So fuck up time. I was at my sister's for tea and my nephews insisted I ate with them. All was well until they began to refuse their carrots (cheap freezer stuff. The recession hit us hard) so being the valiant aunt that I am I took up the act of demonstrating how delicious the orange stubs were to three staring toddlers. I took the smallest one and bit down only to hear a sound that can only be described as the sound a mountain in a film makes before someone screams 'avalanche!!' This carrot wasn't properly thawed and the ice cracked my baby tooth in half, I let out a scream, assuming it was my adult tooth and began to cry because of the intense pain. At this my nephews could only stare in horror as blood seeped from my mouth before joining my tears and it's easy to say they've never touched a carrot since.
[b] | b] I tried to show my nephews how good carrots are and broke my tooth in half, splashing them with carroty blood. |
throwawayorgasmcry | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_2t4sks | My boyfriebd is a childhood friend. We haven't had sex, mostly as I want to wait and only do it with someone I think I'll spend my life with, but have done things with our hands - as we're in an LDR we don't get to spend that much time tigether in person anyway. We've been together, on and off for 1.5 years.
Anyway, in the times we've spent together, I've been able to make him 'finish', but he's never been able to do that to me. I've tried to direct him based on what I do when I masturbate, but it never really happens.
Anyway, when we last met 2 weeks ago we ended up getting pretty high together, and he was fingering me and I felt like I was getting close - I think in the moment I said I'm gonna cum, abd it felt like I had either come or was almost there. Anyway, I felt really weird about it and suddenly just wanted him to stop, so I said stop and think he did (whole thing is a little blurry in my memory). I lay there and he asked if I was okay and I realised I wanted to cry, and he asked again and I did t respond as I was trying to hold back the tears - which I felt I couldn't so I got up telling him I needed to leave, I was going to the bathroom, to find my clothes so I could go. As he looked and tried to ask if I was okay I freaked out to try to find them/get him to find them so I could go. The crying feeling went and in the end I didn't go - I sat back down with him.
He since said, both jokily and seriously that he was upset that my reaction to him making me cum was to just get up and leave, he thought I'd be happy and sit with him for a bit. He asked why I acted weird and as I didn't know what to say I just tried to make out I wasn't weird.
I want to say something to him, but how? What? Or do I just leave it?
And I don't know what was going on with me either. I haven't ever been sexually abused. I don't know if it's about violating morals or anything as I sometimes feel bad/disgusted after doing sexual things with him, but im not religious or anything and don't come from a family thats forced old fashioned ideals on me or anything.
** | bf made me cum for the 1st time, felt like crying so wanted to leave straight away, he's joked about how it upset him - what do I with him and wtf is wrong with me? |
KidKoma | gaming | t5_2qh03 | t3_3v1meb | Some of the stuff in there uses Eve jargon, if you have any questions, feel free to ask.
But the | is leader of a small-ish group ruse cruses the biggest group in the game expertly. |
tooindependent4boy | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_3v2ajq | I apologize in advance if this post is very rambl-y and kind of all over the place. There's a lot that's been on my mind.
My boyfriend [24/M] and I [21/F] have been dating for about 3 months now. I'm still in school, he works full time. We started our relationship the same time I was starting the busiest and most stressful semester, so I told him that I wouldn't be free/able to see him as often as he would probably like. He was fine with it then. I also mentioned to him that I'm a very independent person who hates it when friends/family get so involved with their SO's that they ignore everyone else around them. I also have about two hours a day where I get to be alone and relax, and these two hours are very precious to me. He has his own things to do which keep him busy as well, but he's the kind of guy that needs to be hanging out with other people, or doing something in order to stay happy. Basically, he's super extroverted and I'm somewhat introverted. I don't mind hanging out with people, but I need my alone time.
He's a great guy, very nice, very sweet, but has this habit of making me feel guilty when I don't spend time with him. He would say things like, "Why do you never ask me to hang out?" which I would respond to by explaining that academics have, and always will, come first to me. Now he literally texts me every day, asking if we can spend time together, or if I can go to his place (an hour away) etc.
Problem is, I am bogged down by group projects and school work and finals to study for, as well as club activities and other prior commitments. He knows I'm a busy person - I made this clear to him when we started dating and throughout the entire time we've been dating. The only time that lines up in both of our schedules falls right in the middle of the alone time I set aside for myself - and this time is super important to me, because it's my recharging time.
He also has lots of quirks and habits that I found endearing at first, but now just find kind of annoying. He's very rambunctious, very, very, very loud and very, very touchy-feely. He always needs to have a hand on my waist, or touching my hair, or touching me in some way. My family has never been super touchy feely, so I'm not used to constant touching. When he's touching my waist, I become hyper aware of it and all it does is make me want to squirm away. When he touches my hair, he's always trying to pull knots out of it too because somehow he thinks he's helping but in fact it actually hurts.
I apologize again for how disorganized and rambl-y and just all around messy this entire post is. But the basic | is:
my boyfriend is a very nice guy, but he has annoying habits and is getting super clingy even though he knows I don't like that and he was okay with me being independent in the beginning, now he gets sad when I mention that I like the precious alone time I have. What do? |
EHtrey5 | relationship_advice | t5_2r0cn | t3_311awg | Hi everyone!
So my girlfriend of a year and a half and I had a long talk tonight. She is depressed and is miserable in her life but is holding out hope that when we move out of her parents house things Wil lbe better. Which they will. And I'm fine with that due to me moving out here shortly. We had a long talk tonight about future though and how she doesn't see herself as a monogamisti(Sorry for spelling) person and wants to bring in another girl. Normally as a guy that'd be awesome woo. But I don't like the idea of having to compete for another for her love. I never saw myself in this situation and now I'm confused. Do I let things play out and see how she'd change and maybe not want to do that? She is still young so she wants to experiment a lot. (She is 19). She has a low libido so my needs would hopefully be met with another women. But I'm terrified of losing her emotionally to someone else? What should I do?
( | girlfriend is depressed. Talked about adding another women to our relationship in the future and not sure how I should handle it. |
oasisbsides | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_3143wm | ive been seeing a girl for the past few months and everything was going great. We were texting everyday, seeing each other and enjoying each other's company.
A few weeks ago we talked about our feelings and what we wanted. We both said we really like each other but she wasn't looking for a relationship right now. I thought ok we can take it slow.
But no. She said she's not even sure if she can take it slow because it will eventually lead to something serious and that scares her
We've been keeping up contact but not like we used to and we agreed to be friends. I've noticed that I've been trying to contact her more than she has and I feel stupid after I put in more effort than her.
She said friends is the bottom line and I was confused by that and didn't ask. Should I ask what this meant?
I am really confused as to what I should be doing in this situation. I really like her and she really likes me but, I have no idea what to do or say. Should I let go and let her come to me?
She did say that she could change her viewpoint in 6 months. She says she has baggage from her previous relationship which she ended 7/8 months which lasted 2.5 years.
This is also the closest I've come to being in a relationship as I've had no luck in the past and it shatters my confidence.
Any advice would be awesome and really helpful. Thank you.
** | we both really like each other but she's not ready for something serious. Can't even take it slow |
Smoke731mcb | gaming | t5_2qh03 | t3_315p4y | To clarify, we've always been a gaming household. Me and my little brother had Atari 2600 and 6 or 7 games if my memory serves me correct. My journey differs from allot of people in that we had no Nintendo consoles until the N64. My mom and dad got a PC instead and we all played on it. My mom was the first to beat Duke Nukem 3d, secret agent man, Duke 1 & 2 and ALL the Commander Keen games, heretic, hexen, doom 1 and 2, Wolfenstein 3d. She still plays now but it's mostly candy crush and angry birds. dad grew attached to rainbow six games and need for speed hot pursuit. He was and somewhat still is a steer with your body racer.
Me and my brother returned to console gaming when my best friend (still to this day) introduced me to final fantasy 7. But my parents just kind of stopped gaming over time. Down the line my dad was diagnosed with COPD and not too long ago had to stop working because of it. He of course like most men of his era went nuts doing nothing all day. On a random whim he decided to play the old rainbow six games he used to play since I got them for him on steam. He played it for a little while but a week later he was bored again. That's when it happened. The moment I had trained all my life for.
"Smoke, is there any of these games in your steam like rainbow six?"
After much discussion he decided on FEAR as his next conquest. A few weeks later he's beaten all the FEAR sequels I have and I'm currently watching him read bulletins on the wall in Postal 2 and laugh.
Feels good to watch.
Edit: | my dad asked for my opinion on what to play, makes me happy he enjoys it. |
a_raptor_dick | relationship_advice | t5_2r0cn | t3_2x9sap | After seeing a few other posts in relationships and the overall positive support you get, I've decided to post something that's troubling me as well.
I'm dating a girl that still currently lives with her ex.
A quick up to speed on how we got to this point: met on Facebook, began dating, her Grandmother died, she became distant, called her one night last Spring only to have her "ex"-boyfriend pick up the phone and explain they've been living together, sleeping together, and that he had no idea I existed. He went on about how he has mental issues, he knows he is using her, but he has nowhere else to go, and deep down, the last thing he mentioned, he still loves her.
This was both a shock and relief because I had sensed something was amiss, and that there was someone else I just never in a million years imagined it was him. We have an hour long phone call, and for the first time in my life, I experienced an overwhelming sense of empathy. I felt worse for this guy, than I did for me. Her and I ceased contact that night.
Few months later, she sends me a text out of the blue, while I'm in another girl's bed, the first time I'd been intimate with anyone since her (perfect timing, of course), telling me how she'll never forgive herself for letting me go and that she hopes I'm happy and if she had a chance to do it all over again she would.
I sat on it for a few days, and eventually she crept her way back into my heart. Not my mind, she had absolutely been there since the day I decided to let go, but now my feelings were flooding back at an almost "broken levee" pace and I knew I had to see her.
I e-mailed her, we set up a dinner date, she begins to tell me how he lied, they hadn't been intimate, about how he's too depressed to even get it up and pretty much I was back in love with her. She told me how he had moved out a few months later, and she had been alone. Red flag #1; I suggested us going back to her place, she said, "Sure, but can we just go to my friend's house first. I want you to meet her, and she wants to have a few drinks." No problem.
As it starts getting later and later, and I make attempts to leave, they both seem to appear as if they are trying their hardest to stall. Finally, I just say, "it's time to go" and we leave. On the way back to my car, she flat out says, "no, I don't want you coming back. I still have some of his things there and pictures that I just don't want you to see."
I've been the other guy before. Knowingly. I'm not proud of it, but you meet a girl who's fed up enough with her relationship that you have no interest in being with, just sleeping with, you do what you do. I've slept with girls with pictures of their Boyfriends everywhere and didn't care, so I definitely wasn't going to care as far as with a girl I plan to be with.
I obliged, and we went our separate ways.
A few red flags later, she cancels lunch out of the blue with me. She says her friend is in dire straights and need her right away. I say no problem. No problem until I see her friend out and about sans my Girlfriend. I don't say anything to her, I just get in my car and I drive to her apartment. Her car is there, also her landlord is in the driveway. I've never met her.
I begin to walk up and she asks me who I am. I identify myself as a friend of her's whom she told to meet her for lunch but never showed. I said I had simply thought I may have misinterpreted what she said and that I was supposed to meet her here. The landlord said she'd go knock from the inside, "it's possible they are sleeping."
They.
She came back out saying there was no answer, "possibly they went for a walk." They. I then asked her if she meant C, her ex, she said "yes" and I thanked her for her time and I went home. I waited for her to finally text me and I told her I knew C was still there, and that he hadn't left. That her landlord seems to be under the impression you two are still together, and that I am deeply hurt.
She apologize profusely, claiming that she wants him to leave but she's afraid he will kill himself. He hasn't had a job in 5 years, refuses to get one, and any time she gathers the guts to tell him to leave, he'll yes her to death until the time approaches and he'll threaten suicide. She sends me pictures of all of his stuff around the couch, blankets and pillows, and swears he sleeps on the couch. I tell her I can't do this, and we cease talking again.
I break, we begin talking. She comes out and admits she doesn't know when she'll be able to get him out. I offer as I do many times before, to come there and remove him myself but she won't let me. She says it's something she has to do herself, and I believe it's because he's going to tell me that they are still very intimate and very in love. Either way, I let her do her, and here we are 2 years total later, 4 months since I've decided to give this a go again, and he's still there.
Two days ago I had an hour long phone conversation with her Mother about our history, where we've been, where we are, and where I feel it's going. She reassures me that she, my Girlfriend, loves me to death. That I'm all she talks about and how excited for the future she is. How C, the ex, is mentally unstable and she fears for her Daughter's safety.
I should pause to tell you she has 3 cats, 2 of which he brought with him into the relationship. She loves these cats more than anything in the World, and she's afraid if she kicks him out, he will take them. She's put $1000s of dollars into these cats as far as vet bills, overall taking care of them, and unfathomable amounts of love. Her father is deathly allergic to cats, and cannot have them in the house, or else she would have moved in with them.
The other thing is, she is exactly her Mother's daughter, and she is afraid that he will harm himself, or her, and she just can't live with that if anything was to happen. They've been working on getting him benefits, Government assistance, but every time it comes time for him to take the reigns, he never does.
Today was the day that I suppose put me in the mood I'm in currently. I'm a Stand-Up Comedian living in Brooklyn, attempting to get my brand off the ground and establish myself in the NYC Comedy Scene. We live about 2 1/2 hours, depending on traffic, apart. She usually comes in every Thursday, unless the weather is particularly bad, which it has been of course on the days we are supposed to hang out, so she cancels a lot. A few times this had lead to useless fights on my end, fueled by my disappointment and how fed up I am with the situation. That I could just take a train out to Long Island and spend the night with her, so no one has to drive, but I can't because her ex still lives with her.
It's Thursday, and she has to go to work. She's a manager in retail and a lot of her employees have been asked to cover other stores. She says she has to go in from 8a-4p, and that she will come straight here after work. About an hour ago she shoots me a text saying she's so tired. We keep chatting, but she keeps driving home the point she's so tired. I tell her to just go home and get some rest then, it's no sense in driving all the way here if you're so exhausted.
This is where it started to irk me; so what? Make the drive. I sold my car to put toward my living expenses here, plus the Subway is so fucking awesome that I don't need one, so I can't drive out to her. Not that it'd matter, I can't stay at her place anyway.
The thing that has me boiling is that she could drive here just to sleep, and I'd be fine with that. I love her, I love her awake, sleeping, crying, smiling, cheating...
I just love her. Plus, she won't stay the night because she doesn't want to have to explain to him why she never came home on account of the fact that she hasn't told him out of fear he might snap. I share the same fear, so I agree with her but at the same time it's frustrating. You can't come sleep here because of your ex.
And that's pretty much where I'm at. I feel so much better having typed this out for strangers to read which is eery to me. I'm not the type to do this. I've been cheated on before and bounced the next day, never having talked to that girl again till years later when I felt it okay for both of us to do so.
I don't know why I'm so hung up on her. I mean I know why, I love her unlike I've ever loved another. We talk about how she's taking her new job so she can move to Queens, and we can move in together. I can pursue Comedy, she can work and we can finally start our lives together, but she won't do it till she knows he is safe and won't kill himself. That's just bugged to me.
Really, really bugged.
Thanks, reddit. I'd | but I clearly don't know how to be short. |
idkanymoredude1 | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_2xcsbt | My gf (33) of almost 3 years has lied to
me (23) at least 4 times all of them being about one of her guy "friends"
The last time she lied was about 4-5 months ago and i still feel the need to check up on her
Does that feeling ever go away....
** | should i just break up with her now and get it over with? |
Tryndamere | leagueoflegends | t5_2rfxx | t3_2xeem3 | Hey guys, wanted to follow up and close the loop on where we landed after a lot of debate about the SpectateFaker issue and the new areas it touches on.
Take a look at the link below to get the full scoop, but as part of the | apologies for muddying the waters with an over-protective tone that didn't reflect this case accurately.
Looking forward to hearing all of your thoughts. |
[deleted] | sex | t5_2qh3p | t3_3i9vrj | So I am a 24 year-old female and I am really rather inexperienced sexually...I have had two partners one of which I was with exclusively for eight years. Now that I am single and dating, I am incredibly nervous about sex.
I am in a poly relationship now and there are three people who I am more or less involved with. Its getting to the point now where sex is probably going to come up very soon. I'm going out of town to meet one of my partners and another will be coming to town to meet me in the next few weeks. I am rather nervous. They are both considerably more experienced than me and waaay more sexually active than I am. So I'm scared. Feeling intimidated by how experienced they are and feeling also rather scared about pregnancy and STD's and things that were not a huge concern in my previous long term monogamous relationship.
I'm curious if people out there ever feel the same way? How do you get over the anxiety of having sex, especially after being in a long term relationship for so long? How can I overcome this anxiety? Or should I listen to this anxiety and hold off? I feel like maybe I am not ready but at the same time I feel I am so inexperienced for my age that it actually makes me feel insecure and bad about myself. How do I deal with logistics of safe sex too? How do I mention condom use? Should I carry condoms with me? How do I bring up STI's with partners? What is the etiquette of having that kind of conversation? Its really important to me to be clean and safe but I am really anxious about bringing that up and about having sex with partners that are so vastly more experienced than myself.
Anywho....maybe this is all | but I would just really like some advice or consolation! Thank you. |
Polominty | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_3ibm3z | I know it's not the kind of problem that can compare to some of the stuff here but I'm heartbroken.
Weve had Hamish for 2 years. We adopted him from a farm and he's been our baby ever since. We've raised him from a tiny feral kitten to a handsome cat.
This morning my neighbour knocked on my door and gently told me Hamish was lying in the road. I have a massive phobia of dead animals so I couldn't even get close to him but it was clear he was dead and had been ran over a few times.
My neighbour very kindly placed him in a bag and he's in his cat carrier outside. My SO doesn't want me to touch him until he gets home (driving from over 4 hours away). My neighbour has gently told me that Hamish is not in a good way but my SO is insistent he wants to see him before we take him to the vets. I think we can get his ashes but I don't even know.1
I just need advice on how to stop hurting. I love my cat so so much- he's helped me through depression, arguments, lonely nights and now he's gone...and I was asleep as he died. I never thought I would feel SO much pain over a cat. My SO is also devastated.
** | poor baby cat has died. How do I deal with this pain |
mj9057 | summonerschool | t5_2t9x3 | t3_3icaeh | Hey guys, last night i managed to hit Gold 5 after several long and painful months of climbing. I finished last season in silver 4, and after going 7-3 in placements in season 5 I thought i was going to get a pretty decent rank. Well, i got bronze 1, which put me on tilt and i ended up falling to bronze 4. At this point in time, i knew something needed to change, i started watching streams, reading guides for my favorite champions, and watching the LCS, really anything i could do that i thought would give me an advantage over my opponents. And 8 months later it paid off, i climbed out (what I consider) low elo, and into gold.
All that being said, i think my next logical goal would be to shoot for platinum. I know that right now as someone who's Gold 5 0lp im not playing at a platinum level.
( | for those of you who have climbed into plat/are in plat, whatre some tips you have for climbing through gold, generally speaking, what is missing from my game that is seen at the platinum level? |
ThatDamnClarkGable | gaming | t5_2qh03 | t3_3id31x | As the title says, I'd love to get into Metal Gear Solid 5, but I've never played any of the other games. Could someone possibly give me a brief rundown or | of the franchise? |
Dryer_Lint | tifu | t5_2to41 | t3_3qcnen | Oh boy.
I've been living on campus at my university for about a month now. For the past month or so now I've been pretty sure my resident assistant has been flirting with me. I'm not very good at reading women so I asked a couple other people who've seen us around each other (even my mom) and they all agreed I wasn't crazy. I never thought of her that way before but she's not a terrible person and she's kind of attractive so I thought hey I'll give it a shot.
Which is why on Friday I went to the flower store, bought her a small bouquet of roses and baby's breath, made sure they were discretely wrapped, and send them to her.
Two days later I hadn't gotten any sort of acknowledgement, so figured either a. I grossly misinterpretted her actions and now she's avoiding me or b. she isn't sure that it was me who sent the flowers.
So I just straight up messaged her, "Hey, did you like the flowers?"
Well, I probably got the worst possible answer. It was as follows. "Please don't post anything more on the group (facebook, where I post a lot) page. You and I will talk in person. I'm in my room until 2pm besides lunch at noonish." So now I'm just stalling in waiting to see her and preparing for the inevitable, "Don't contact me outside of our professional relationship again."
The | moral of the story is: Don't send girls who you think like you flowers, especially if you're socially retarded.
Update 1 :
She told me that what I did was "unprofessional" and made her uncomfortable and said she doesn't want to see me anymore outside our professional dealings. I said, "okay." She was like, "is that all you have to say?" And was like, "Yep, I will do all those things." So there you go.
But on the other hand, if receiving anonymous flowers made her uncomfortable then it probably wouldn't have lasted anyway.
Update 2:
I told this story to someone who's pretty attractive (mentally and physically) and who is all around just pretty cool whom I am in a class work group with, and she said these exact words.
"I wouldn't mind if you sent me flowers. I mean, I love getting flowers!" blush
└(>o< )┘ |
katarinacalavera | sex | t5_2qh3p | t3_3qdaka | I (21/f) have been on a rollercoaster of a year discovering new kinks with my bf (21/m). We've hit an exploratory phase in our relationship and have started trying a little bit of everything, from pegging to consensual non-consensuality to a lot of other stuff. We've been trying to encourage each other to come clean about any fantasy we've been too embarrassed to talk about to this point. Which leads me to the current curveball I'm dealing with.
Last night, boyfriend and I were getting it on, making out, grinding, etc., and he starts talking dirty. He's saying all the usual stuff, calling me names, and I'm super super into it. Suddenly, just as I'm about to go down on him, he asks me if I've ever imagined giving another man a blowjob.
This kind of threw me for a loop. We had talked before about how we felt about swinging (I was okay with him doing another guy, and he was okay with me doing another girl) and he had mentioned that it would be hot if I ever decided to go down on a guy, but I didn't realize he meant in a one-on-one, him-not-there kind of way. And now, literally as I'm blowing him, he's asking me if I've ever dreamed about doing it to someone else, and if I wanted to try it anytime soon.
In the moment, I responded honestly; I said that yes, I did have some fantasies, and he asked me to tell him them right then and there. And from this point forward, we just kept on with foreplay as I told him in detail about the fantasies I had had. I even mentioned a specific person that had expressed interest in having a threesome with us, about how I had fantasized about doing things to him and sending my bf pictures while it happened. This got him extremely hot and bothered, and he was more into it than I ever could have imagined. The sex after that point was pretty rad.
So the advice I'm looking for is this: since my boyfriend seems really turned on by this, and so am I, how do I go about finding someone that's okay with me doing something like this to them? I have difficulty imagining just walking up to someone and saying "hi, you're really attractive, I want to blow you and maybe take pictures for my boyfriend if that's okay" and expecting that to work sans difficulty. Also, how do I make sure that my bf is truly okay with this? Even though I've asked him twice today to make sure he wasn't just wrapped up in the fantasy, he keeps saying that he really was into it and wants me to try it if I want to. How much should I keep him in the loop? Should I tell him if I'm just thinking about it, or only if I'm actually going to do it?
So | boyfriend wants me to give other men blowjobs, unsure of how to approach men for this and still make sure that my bfs feelings aren't hurt. |
NovaBlade119 | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | t3_1m97p1 | There's this extremely cute girl in my advanced production class in college. The thing is, she's super friendly with everyone, but she gives over-encouraging comments on my work(since I know video editing software extremely well) I have contemplated asking her to hang out sometime, but the problem is in college, there usually is a dividing line between Greek and non-Greek people. It doesn't end well. This usually stops most guys and girls from pursuing each other in college.
I guess what I'm asking is should I attempt to ask her to hang out anyways? I've been shut down before in the past and it wasn't great, but I have a year left and I'm trying to push myself out of my "terrified of pretty girls" zone before it's too late for me. Any advice would be helpful!
And I understand if there's a lot of | responses :P |
Backflipking | Fitness | t5_2qhx4 | t3_1mavtw | I've heard mix things about working at GNC. Some say that it's the worst job they had b/c they had to upsell stuff that wasn't great and others say that had a great time w/ the customers that come in and etc.
I have experience upselling (hold some of the top sales for upselling when I worked at Carmike), would like to think I have an upbeat personality and get along with various people. Just a down to Earth guy in need of a job. This is my 7th job so I would like to think I was more than qualified at my age. (in College right now)
I started working a few days ago and only worked 2 shifts. I've closed the store both times and it seems quite easy to do that. I haven't done any register / cashier work but it seems easy enough. I'm hoping that within a week I'll be good to open and close the store.
My issue is I know next to nothing about the products. My manager knew this when he hired me though and told me it was my personality and resume that got me the job despite not knowing about the products since I can learn what each can do.
I'm wondering what are some good tips for the products for someone who is a noob like myself. I would also like to use some of the products, if healthy for someone of my size (I'm skinny and have always been skinny. I have some heart issues (birth defect) and a very fast metabolism and eat very little since I don't get hungry often). I don't want to be what negative reviews say about the job. I know my job is to upsell but I plan on being honest and actually know about the products. I don't plan on selling a teen with small weight issue a bunch of C4 or something. I want to actually learn about the products for my customers but also for myself.
Anyways | just want some help with how the company works, employee experience, but most importantly what each (or just sections) products does and how it affects people.
Thanks to whoever can help! |
[deleted] | relationship_advice | t5_2r0cn | t3_1mcl1l | Throw away because she would KILL me if she found out I talked to one person about our relationship.
<p>My girlfriend and I (20) have been dating for two years now. We're in love with each other and we've been through a lot more than most couples our age go through. Of course we've had our ups and downs, I was an ass in high school a few times, (took her for granted mainly, choosing my friends over her in certain situations) learned from it, and I'm much more mature than I was then, and much more in love with her from realizing things. She has been great through our whole relationship, loving, caring, great girlfriend traits.
<p>Right now my girlfriend is in a "slump," meaning she doesn't like the way she looks, doesn't think she has much going for her, and feels like she's not good enough when she tries new things; she’s told me this via text. She also told me she doesn't want me to feel bad for her and that she's been acting distant and not into our relationship because she's in a slump. Well of course I feel bad for her I would never want her to feel like that for any reason; that sucks. She has been in “slumps” before, mostly in middle school and a few times in high school and she says they always go away, but this has been the worst one yet. I think she’s had these slumps because her friends have been fake and sometimes awful people to her and she’s strayed away from them, a good thing to do, but it gets to her. Also because she’s staying at home and going to community college while a lot of her friends go onto universities. I feel that’s a good probability since I went through somewhat of a “slump” when I went through the same college experience.
<p>That being said, I’m trying my best to help her get out of it while giving her space and being there for her at the same time. We don’t talk as much (possible variable being she’s been busy with 2 jobs), she doesn’t say I love you as much, and we haven’t seen each other in a week, which is rare for us. When we do talk I try and pick her spirits up instead of acting negative, so we actually have had some fun conversations while this has been going on! Oddly.. But, it’s obvious the girl I love isn’t entirely herself. I try to act the same as I always have, saying I love you, being positive, pretty much just trying to interact with her how I always have. I do this because I’m pretty sure I’m not the problem, but it has been REALLY hard having her act like she’s not into our relationship for me, but I’ve been trying to stay strong for the sake of her and our relationship. I’m just not entirely sure if she’s losing feelings for me while also being in a slump. She’s been acting like this for a week now and if she wanted to break up I’m pretty sure it would have happened by now.
<p>I was wondering if Reddit could help me out, what could I do to help the situation? Have any female redditors gone through a slump like this? Anything help’s, thanks!
<p> | p>Girlfriend is in a “slump” and because of her slump she’s been acting distant and not into our relationship. Trying my best to find happy medium with giving her space and being there for her. |
[deleted] | sex | t5_2qh3p | t3_1md0d5 | Throwaway account, apologies, but my lack of confidence in bed extends to the internet right now.
As the title states, I have yet to have sex at 26. Not for lack of desire, mind you; mostly due to shyness in general and especially around women I find attractive (I'm a heterosexual male in case that doesn't make it clear). I attribute this mainly to growing up extremely nerdy, but the reason isn't as important to me as finding solutions to the problems I have now.
I'm very nervous about the prospect of -finally- finding someone with enough in common with me to fall for, having everything work out and fall into place, and then being the worst guy ever in bed. I don't want sex itself to be the hurdle that ruins a relationship for me, but I have no idea how or where I would be able to "get good" at sex outside of the act itself, which, barring prostitution (which has external costs/issues) creates a situation to which I have no solutions.
So the core question, and also | are there any ways (besides having sex) to become better at having sex, for a man? |
[deleted] | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_1zagyu | My [18 F] boyfriend [18 M]of four years is deciding on a college. He does not have his AA degree. I want him to a community college nearby to get his AA, as it will be free (with financial aid etc, everything will be paid for). However he wants to go straight to a private university that charges 40,000 dollars a semester. He had some scholarships and financial aid, where it might cost him 25,000 to 30,000 a semester.
It makes a lot more sense for him to get his AA for free at a community college and then move on to a university. It would save so much money.
I've told him all of this. Yet his parents are pushing him to go to university right away. Both of them went to a big college and they are both unemployed. He won't listen to me, and is making a bad decision.
If he decides to go to this college, we will have to move a few hours away from all our friends and family as well. How can I get him to make the right decision?
Sorry this is long, and I don't really know how to | it. |
[deleted] | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_1zbov7 | I(18m) like a classmate of mine(18f). She's a very good friend, but we don't have many things in common, other than enjoying each others company. We are basically very different people who still like each other.
To clarify, we hang out a lot, have the same friends and are going to be in the same class in college for four years. I haven't had much experience with dating, so need a little help here. Could a relationship between us work?
Edit: | can a relationship between two people who don't have a lot in common work? |
[deleted] | TwoXChromosomes | t5_2r2jt | t3_1zg5jp | Hi! I just wanted to share some amazing news I just got. Backstory: I used to live on the west coast, where I owned a very successful accounting service. A whole bunch of stuff happened (mum's death, divorce, miscarriage, epilepsy diagnosis) & I had kind of a breakdown of sorts. I moved to the east coast & hunkered down on a remote racehorse farm in Maine to lick my wounds. I essentially swung from being bordeline catatonic to white hot rage, those were my main emotions for almost 3 years. I lost everything I had, literally everything - every cent, every plan, every friend, & every hope I'd ever had for my future. Then I had the amazing luck to meet my...(I hate this term so much & don't even really believe in it) soul mate. A man who is so calm, & so reliable, & so safe, that he allowed me to just...start healing. I was like an abused dog that finally got adopted into a loving home, & I wanted to learn how to stop biting everyone's face off & instead jump on them with joy (so to speak). We moved to Boston, & I finally got help (therapy & an excellent neurologist).
I'm just started the therapy, & it's one of the most terrifying things I've ever done, but I can feel that it's the right thing to do. I can feel that this is a good path for me (which of course makes it somewhat painful for me. Fellow fuck ups will recognize this feeling). Part of this new growth towards healing is that I've finally started up the same accounting service I used to run back home. Although I'd been able to work sporadically, my untreated epilepsy had me essentially disabled, & I've also lost all my life savings trying to stay alive (though my SO really deserves the credit. without him I would have been on the street or in a shelter). so, now i've restarted my business, I have one client that's been going well for a couple of months, & finally went after a new one. I just got the word a few minutes ago that they are offering me a contract. It's huge, it's a ton of money, & will lead to many more clients. This is my turning point back into the life I want & deserve. I guess I want to share this because I am so happy & proud, but also to anyone out there that is struggling right now: you can do this. Get help, get help, get help. If the first help doesn't help, try other help. You deserve life. Thanks.
Edit: | there's hope. As long as you are breathing, there is hope.
Edit 2: Thank you so much for the support. Due to all the aforementioned drama, I've been pretty isolated for the last few years, it's nice to feel like I have some sort of community. :) |
[deleted] | Fitness | t5_2qhx4 | t3_1zgsno | I've seen a lot of programs that do 3x5, 3x8, 2x12, etc. Can someone give me the | on why people would do one versus the other? |
IllegalThoughts | Fitness | t5_2qhx4 | t3_2e3kc3 | Overview of the program can be seen [here] (
As of right now I am already in a bulk phase so I am going to finish off this week eating 3500 calories a day and then beginning the 2-week cut portion on monday.
If any of you have done this sort of program before please let me know how you fared, etc.
quick | of the program
Four week cycle
First two weeks: Over-eating
-Body-weight * 12 + 1500 calories (~3500 calories for me)
-Typical strength training reps (3-5)
Second two weeks: Cutting
-Adjust calories to Bodyweight * 8 (~1550 calories here for me)
-Cardio
-Moderate STR training (8-12 reps) |
whatthehellhaveIdone | leagueoflegends | t5_2rfxx | t3_2e5mzo | I see a few posts a day with questions about MMR and LP gains, so I’ve been meaning for a while to write this so I figured I'd throw it up while the server is down. Note that not all of this is confirmed by Riot and some is just inference based on what I’ve seen of the matchmaker in 2000 games as well as enough knowledge of programming to understand the needs of the system. This will also focus on Summoner’s Rift, but the same concepts apply to other queues, including ARAMs and special game modes.
MMR: Matchmaking Rating is the invisible number that the system uses to group you into games. Separate numbers exist for Ranked and Normal queues. This number updates every game, and is unaffected by dodging or inactivity. MMR is hidden deliberately to make abusing it more difficult.
ELO: Not to be confused with MMR, ELO is the previous system used to show relative skill levels. ELO isn’t around anymore, but essentially worked like LP but without divisions and tiers on a single scale from 0-3000ish rather than 0-100 for each division. It was not equal to MMR then, nor would it be if it were re-implemented.
Tiers, Divisions, and League Points: Imagine a yard stick. Each foot on the yard stick is marked out with a big bold line and a number. Each inch is marked with a smaller line and a number. Each half inch is marked with a smaller line, eight inches are smaller still, and sixteenth inches are like grains of rice. The Ranked Ladder is like a giant yard stick. Tiers are like feet, big, bold, and easy to see. Divisions are like inches, more accurate. League points are like those fractions of inches. The whole ranked player base is stacked up on that yard stick somewhere.
When you press “find team”, the system checks the only number that it cares about, MMR. It then begins collecting players that are close to your MMR, with the goal to create two teams with almost exactly the same average MMR. The longer it takes to find players for your game, the more it spreads out its search, to find players further away from your skill level. This is why match making is worst during off-peak hours, like early in the morning.
In the case of premades, it takes the average MMR, and attempts to match to that. Again, the goal is for the average MMR of both teams to be as close as possible, with as close to similar make ups as possible. If one premade brings a Diamond player and a Bronze, the match maker will try to find another similar pair to put on the other team.
Once the two teams are created, your queue pops. If someone declines, you go back to the queue, and the teams may be rearranged to get average MMR to be equal again. When everyone accepts, you go to champion select. Assuming no one dodges, the system ignores the game until it ends.
After the game, the system updates all your numbers. First, it gets the average MMR of the game, and compares that to your MMR. If the average MMR is higher than your personal MMR, and you won, you will gain a larger amount of MMR than if you were higher than the average. If you lost, and you personal MMR was lower than the average, you will lose more than if you were lower to begin with.
Then if the game was ranked, the system takes the difference between your personal MMR and the average MMR of the game. Then it takes your MMR and compares it to where you should be for your LP/Division/Tier. Both of these factors are accounted for in the calculation for LP gains and losses. The highest gains will be seen playing against higher ranked opponents as the lowest MMR in the game. The worst losses will be seen as the highest MMR player against a group of lower ranked opponents.
The biggest question directed at the League system is why use it over the ELO system. The League system offers more obvious rewards (instantaneous recognition when you complete a promotion) and most importantly is less intimidating. Looking at a whole ladder of ELO points seems hopeless, while Leagues make setting simple goals (“I want to climb 1 full division this month”) relatively easy. Leagues were also intended to help eliminate ladder anxiety and in some situations (bottoms of Tiers) they did. Tiers are easy for new players to understand instantly (Silver is better than Bronze, Diamond is the best, Challenger is special because it isn’t a precious stone, etc). The main reason for the League system is the consistency. It takes more consistent play to win promotions than it does to simply climb a ladder.
Long post, but there isn’t a way to | easily. Any suggestions or corrections are welcome, especially regarding formatting. |
hudsoneezy | summonerschool | t5_2t9x3 | t3_2e7lnh | In the last 3 or 4 patches what has changed monumentally, I could do the research and scrutinize over 4 patch notes but I mean, | in the last 8 weeks what has been the largest changes? |
[deleted] | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_2e92r7 | Hi reddit!
Long time lurker here, using a throw away because my girlfriend knows my reddit account.
So my girlfriend of 2 years has always had issues with her body and is generally insecure. This is something that I have been helping her deal with for almost a year. She had made some great progress as far as starting to like her body and the way she looks (or so I thought).
There have been a couple instances where I have noticed her acting strangely around meal times. First of all, she eats an absurd about of food for a woman her size. She then complains about it afterwards and about how sick she feels. In the last couple of months, I have also noticed that whenever we eat cold foods, she has to pace herself because she says that the cold makes her teeth hurt. But the biggest thing that I noticed was that whenever we smoke weed, she has an intense hacking fit immediately after inhaling. This didn't always happen, but I didn't really think much of it.
Well today a good mutual friend of ours told me that he had something he needed to tell me because he feared for her health. He said that she had become a bulimic about a year ago, and confided in him about two months later. He swore up and down that he would never tell a soul, especially mine, and he would be there to help her with it.
Well, it's been 10 months since then and she apparently continues to make herself vomit after almost every meal. It finally got to the point where our friend decided that for her own safety I should know about it. But he made me promise not to tell her that he told me. The only problem with this is that no matter how I bring it up, she will knowbthat he was the one who told me, and it will most likely ruin her relationship with that friend.
So now I'm stuck. I really really want to bring it up with her because I know the danger of eating disorders. I also feel kind of hurt that she kept this from me for so long. It makes me feel like she doesn't trust me to help her through it or she thinks I will judge her or something. But that's not the most important thing right now. I don't want to wait until the next time she slips up because that could be months away.
What do I do guys? How can I help her but not break my promise to my friend?
** | girlfriend is bulimic, just found out |
kursdragon | leagueoflegends | t5_2rfxx | t3_1k0dmy | My friend had the great idea that we should be able to see the other teams chat at the end of the game kind of like the tribunal offense so that we can make a decision on whether we think reporting someone would be justified. People always tell the other team to report someone but unless the person that is being reported said some bad stuff in all chat or intentionally fed or something the team can't know whether to report him or not. This way they can make an educated report when they are able to see the chat of the other team and see how they talked basically like a tribunal but for the guys that were in the game.
Edit: | show chat of both teams at the end game screen so that people can justify a report on someone |
132131541654 | tifu | t5_2to41 | t3_1k221i | So let's just give a bit of background here, I, like a lot of people, watch porn. The thing is, I have this nice sharp 1080p so I'm not going to watch some crappy low quality video. Instead, I am a member of a couple private torrent trackers for porn. This has resulted in me having quite a [big amount]( of porn on my hard drive.
Me and a friend are currently working on a big project, one which involves computers. Now, my porn folder is hidden away quite well. The actual torrent files are not, since people looking around my computer folders is not a regular occurrence. So, I'm navigating to a file and mistakenly click on the folder with torrent files in it. Though the upper half of the screen contained folders like Music and Movies, the lower half was filled with, well, pretty descriptive titles.
It's important to note my friend's character. While most of my friends would laugh at such an incident, this friend is somewhat shy and I feel that such an incident could at least make our relationship somewhat weird. Feeling my heart sink, I clicked away as quickly as humanly possible, hoping that he hadn't managed to read the titles. There was no reaction on his face either.
Skip to a couple hours later, I see something pop up in my lower right corner. Up popped a "finished download" notification, telling me (us) that the download of [ pornstar name pornstar name .... slut .... (I'm trying to not be too specific here). Again, with my heart dropping at the speed of light, I clicked it away in the blink of an eye but the chances of him seeing at least something in either of these incidents are obviously pretty damn big.
** | showed shy friend massive porn collection. Showed him again in case he didn't see it the first time. |
[deleted] | leagueoflegends | t5_2rfxx | t3_1k33w8 | Look we've all had those times where we call adc but the mf whose giving being silent, instalocks which then forces you to A: take another role, B:run duo adc, or C: leave match and wait several minutes.
Sadly all these options sadly hurt the good guy and not the guy at fault, so why not have a simple delay to locking in, say have people wait 15 seconds before locking in?
( | have 15 seconds after the match starts where you cant lock in, so we dont have instalockers) |
[deleted] | leagueoflegends | t5_2rfxx | t3_1k34j4 | Look we've all had those times where we call adc but the mf whose giving being silent, instalocks which then forces you to A: take another role, B:run duo adc, or C: leave match and wait several minutes. Sadly all these options sadly hurt the good guy and not the guy at fault, so why not have a simple delay to locking in, say have people wait 15 seconds before locking in? ( | have 15 seconds after the match starts where you cant lock in, so we dont have instalockers) |
thebaneofmyexistence | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_1k4epe | Sorry in advance for the length here!
I am a 24 year old woman who has been with her 24 year old boyfriend for about 3 1/2 years. We met in college, and graduated over 2 years ago, staying together, even though it meant being long distance, since we both moved back to our respective home towns. We usually see each other twice a month now.
For a variety of reasons, some probably better than others, I have become increasingly unhappy with my boyfriend for the last year or so. I found myself wishing so many things, from wishing he were more socially adept to wishing he were a better sexual partner. I just don't find myself connecting with him very well anymore, and if I try to mention to him that something in our relationship bothers me, he generally just brushes me off. He’s a wonderful, kind, generous person in so many ways, but I just don’t feel like I’m going to marry him someday, and I would honestly like to meet other guys, since he is only my third boyfriend ever. I know part of me is afraid to lose him as a friend, because I know I lose the right to have him in my life if I break up with him.
I am moving to Europe in about 6 weeks to teach English as a Second Language for a year. It's been a dream of mine since I was 16 years old, and I am so thrilled to finally have the chance to do this. I figured when I applied for the position several months ago that if I got in, I would break up with him before I left. It seemed like a sensible and reasonable plan, but now that that time is here, I basically feel like I can't do it. I feel like he will never understand, I feel like he doesn’t feel any of the things wrong in our relationship that I feel. I think he’ll be terribly hurt, since he seems to sort of assume that we’re staying together. He’s already asked me a few times to move in with him, but I’ve always turned him down. Now I’m starting to get the feeling he wants me to move in with him after I get back next year.
I guess I'm posting here because I need general advice on breaking up with someone I've been with this long and someone I care about so much.
1) I have never ended a relationship before in my life, how do I do this??
and
2) How do I end a long distance relationship? I would hate for him to make the trip up here (about a 2 hour drive) for me to break up with him, but I don't go to visit him overnight (he lives at home still, and there would be no extra sleeping space for me). Sometimes he and I will meet for the day at a halfway point between our homes, but that is always a public space, so I feel like that is wrong too. I don't want to break up with him over the internet or on the phone though. What do I do?
So my | is: Please give me advice on ending a long term, long distance relationship with a boyfriend whom I’m pretty sure doesn’t see it coming. I know intellectually it makes sense, but emotionally, I am having a really hard time dealing with this. Thanks! |
nibbl123 | leagueoflegends | t5_2rfxx | t3_1kb258 | This is most likely not gonna reach the people I'm devoting this to, but I'm sure I'm not the only one feeling like this.
So you just queue up for an innocent normal, just playing without the pressure of ranked and the LP. You either meet a couple of people that feel completely the same, or you meet THIS kind of people.
Let me give you an example:
You're in champ select and nothing really big happens. You have a duo in your team which calls bot lane and because you're not a douche you're giving it to them. Beside the premade's rather unconventional picks, the game starts without any flame or anything. The premade, though, had a rough start and got behind very early. But, nothing is lost right? The "support" is gonna pink and the jungler is gonna help them right? No, you're wrong. Instead, they kept fighting with the knowledge of being miles behind. The jungler even asked where the wards are, but all they did was blaming him for losing them the lane (This is not where it's going to, but still an intresting phenomenon.)
So, 18 minutes in, the enemy Graves is 12/0 and our bot lane is 0/12. After suggesting teamrelated objective control or less typing, they proceed to make it even worse and sell all their stuff, buy troll items and stay in base. After pointing that out, one of them said:" idc, it's just a normal" - A Summoner has disconnected. And so did his premade partner. Now, this does not only apply to premade, but it seems to happen more often. Funnily enough, people saying that are unranked most of the times.
Now my point is, why do poeple have SUCH a degrading attitude towards normals? Just because normals doesn't have competition, doesn't mean you're allowed to be a complete toxic douche and literally be that bad on purpose that you don't give a damn what happens. I do approve the opinion that normals are the place to practice stuff that's new for you as in champs you have not played very often or buy certain builds, but I do not approve the people that play normals because all they want is a trolly game to fuck around with while dragging 4 people with them. If you had a stressful day or bad ranked games, don't queue up for normals. Close League and do something to REDUCE your stress.
That's my rather rant- and/or complain sounding post. Sorry for the wall. No | because my english sucks and I don't know how to compress this into 2 sentences. |
smuckle | relationship_advice | t5_2r0cn | t3_1gmcd4 | First of all, english is not my first language, sorry for potential mistakes.
I like this girl [17F] and we have made out a few times before. I want to take this relationship to the next level by making it more serious than the occasional hookup but I have never been in a real relationship. I don't know what I would do in one, do you hang out with her every day? How much do you date? Do I pay for everything?
She has been in a long relationship before and I don't want to disappoint her by being a bad boyfriend because idk what to do.
So yeah | some basic explanation of how a relationship works and what my role would be.
Thanks! |
[deleted] | leagueoflegends | t5_2rfxx | t3_1gn0gr | No one can start a game and just lock in a champ..... even if you're the first to pick in draft mode the number one argument is "this isn't ranked" and you'll most likely get trolled or hated on.
I don't wanna give my two cents on how ones experience as a new player should be or how mine was but I think I'm getting over the 'new to the game' phase and I've accepted everything except this little hump, and I think theres a solution.
In champion select there should be an additional 1-2, where you select what role and what type of champion you like to play. Kind of like how they have champions categorized as pushers etc. You could select "top lane" or "in the jungle" so people can just view that and be like "oh, ok" because I feel you should not have to use the chat box every time you get ready to play. It can be so much more efficient. Above all, I think this would solve the whole "this isn't ranked", "well why not go to blind pick", and "please, you're like the tenth person to do this to me today" problem for new players.
I know most people either play ranked or follow along with this hidden code of conduct but if you practice a lot in normals, blind pick or draft pick, you feel the pain. It makes more sense to go to blind pick, where you can pick champions at the same time as everyone else if you want to be able to just call jungle after someone locked in jarvan with smite ten seconds ago because, thats the hidden rule, you called it, you can be that annoying guy that forces him top. In draft mode, theres a reason why the game was coded that way, and yet still, most people yell at you. They look at you as the guy who just wants to start trouble or stand out or something when you dont really even say anything when this happens to you in blind mode but because you want to pick what you want to pick becuase you PICK FIRST theres something youre doing wrong and everyone either bandwagons you or the person whos role you "took" ends up throwing, or going jungle with you--forcing you to comply--or they just end up doing terrible(which btw having a lot of field experience with this I'm telling you it's not a coincidence that 3/5 peoples whose roles were taken play like absolute crap.
I just typed that up in like 30 seconds so you can see Im very annoyed...
Anyway,
the | is
There are a ton of things you have to get use to about this community when you're new to League of Legends.
There is only one thing you have to get used to about the game, thats really just the nature of moba (if you're new to it), or the way league of legends has made it but it would be a really good idea to have it setup where you can just pick the role too. Blind pick games would look like this, either everyone finds a place, or they disagree and agree to switch things up, and draft pick games would be so if your the one trying to go jungle and the first to pick already checked jungle, its YOU thats starting trouble.
Thank you.
edit: maybe you could also just do this with draft mode idk. |
[deleted] | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_1gpdek | Obviously this shouldn't be a problem, but ever since she told me (I'm one of the few people that know), I've just felt that things are awkward.
I'm really here to ask: How does having a bisexual partner affect a relationship?
She cares for me and I really like her, but again this knowledge makes me subliminally change my view of her and makes things awkward. I don't know how to look past it - it shouldn't bother me, but it puts me off a little bit.
To clarify, I don't consider myself homophobic, but society as a whole has such a weird/negative outlook on any sexuality other than heterosexual that it's worn off on me a bit, and I'm looking to look past that.
Mandatory | my girlfriend told me that she is bisexual and I need advice on how to proceed and/or look past something that shouldn't make me change my opinion of her.
Just a little bit lost, thanks for any advice! |
[deleted] | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_1gqr8l | We have a six year relationship. A 2.5 year old daughter and have been living together for 2 years we have gone through a lot of hardship through out our relationship. At 18 years old he became my first serious relationship and after our first year of dating a co worker and I started flirting he knew I had a bf and we liked each other it progressed to him telling me he liked me and that I should dump my current boyfriend which I proceeded to do, it seemed like a good idea at the time, I was young the relationship with my bf was turning serious which made me freak out because I was so young and scared of being in a vulnerable position and wanted to date around. My bf knew something was going on I must have been acting different towards when I tried breaking up with him he admitted that he had gone ahead and logged in to my myspace profile and found that I had in fact been talking to my co worker, I wanted to break up but my boyfriend talked to me and asked me not to break up with him it was then and there that I knew I was making a mistake when I saw how much I meant to him and was willing to stay with me after he knew what I had done. But from there on our trust issues begun he later went on to check my facebook because he thought there was something going on with a male friend and I, he saw there wasnt anything but admitted to having snooped. From then on I became paranoid and took him snooping as a sign that his snooping was a reflection of him hiding something/ trying to get even for what I had done with my co worker.
Fast forward to now we have a daughter moved in together very happy and thinking that we'd make everything work,it was good for the most part with arguments here and there and then a major moment when we both found we were falling out of love and decided we needed to do something about it go out more, really enjoy each others company and the such for a while I hadnt been this happy with our relationship, but it all came to a screeching halt. I became suspicious because he had recently started talking to a close female friend after they had a fall out. I knew they had a thing for each other and everyone in his circle of friends knows that she is sexually loose to put it nicely, I did it I had his phone and proceeded to look at their conversation my jaw dropped when I found that they had a sexual skype encounter all this when the two of us were momentarily broken up when I was pregnant, so no it was not cheating but it sure felt like I got slapped in the face, I considered not saying anything to him because hey thats what I got for looking right? but I couldnt keep it to myself so I told him from then on all of our trust issues resurfaced and its been up and down with our relationship. I dont like the person I have turned into yeah I already had trust issues with all men because I came from parents who had a marriage with cheating, but then he opened the door to snooping and I kind of felt that since he did it and kept doing it why shouldn't I?
We are now struggling to keep it together I am putting in my best effort to make it work but it all seems one sided. Hes hot and cold but since our last argument I feel like he has distanced himself from me, less affection, texts only when he needs something and honestly just doesnt seem to enjoy the time we spend together. Im at a loss of what to do I want this to work but I dont know how to fix our trust issues and its tearing me apart that he seems to have no interest but yet is reluctant to end things because right now I cant bring myself to do it I still feel there is something to salvage, wishful thinking I guess that things will get better.
( | relationship with trust issues how do we fix this ) |
soccerplayer11 | relationship_advice | t5_2r0cn | t3_1gtpzf | Alright well at the beginning of school this past year I became super good friends with this incoming freshman (I was a sophomore). She played on my sports team and we were seriously such great friends. We both have identical senses of humor (you better believe we sent r/funny links back and fourth) and spent many nights drinking and hanging out. We were honestly best friends, and could confide in each other about like anything. Like, she was super depressed the whole year and I was the only person she would like cry in front of and talk to about it. We had so many inside jokes, I was so happy to have met someone I cliqued with so well.
I think I might be bisexual but she didn't know this, and I always assumed she was straight (she was like the homecoming queen of her high school! Lotsa boyfriends). In fact, she told me a few times about how uncomfortable gay people made her and even though it's not right to discriminate she couldn't help but feel weirded out by it. A month or two into second semester I guess something changed. She drank beers and slept over, which was really normal, but the one time we sorta kissed. And we definitely cuddled in a more than friendly way. I sorta brushed it off and we didn't talk about it but then when she saw me hanging out with my other female friend at a party she sent me all these super passive-aggressive and jealous texts. The next time she came over for beers and stuff, we full-out made out. And she mostly initiated everything. We did this like double digits amounts of times, and we would text all day everyday. She would say how happy she was with me, tell me I was perfect and that she loved me. She'd even say shit like "The whole game today all I could think about was how I wanted to kiss you--it's hard playin like that". But she would occasionally be like "this isn't me. this isn't right, i'm not like this. don't you think this is weird". Then this boy started to like her and she started like, talking to him and going on dates with him while still doing things with me. And said she felt bad for doing that to me and knew she probably wouldn't be as happy with him but that we should just be friends because being with a girl isn't what she wants.
We hooked up one more time after that and then it was finals week. She was super busy and stressed out and I thought she was just distant because of that but it became clear she was just being sorta cold and distant towards me in general. Before this, she told me she would visit me all the time this summer and then the one time she was actually going to she acted weird about it so I told her not to come if she didn't want to. Then we got into fight where she said things are weird now and she doesn't know how to fix it because she can't take back what she did and she wished "none of that shit ever happened" and "it was the biggest mistake of her life" and "she fuckin hates herself for it" (for doing gay things with me, not for messing up our friendship or anything) and now we don't talk at all. Even though I told her we could just be friends and its fine and to move on. Its bullshit because I told her all along just to do what made her happy and I was cool with just being friends but it still kept happening. And now she doesn't even wanna be my friend anymore. I don't know if I should be mad because shes being horrible to me, or sad because shes clearly depressed. I don't know if I should actually give up hope on our friendship and move forward, or keep trying to be patient and understanding because she is struggling. But she has seriously treated me horribly so I just don't know. It's like I never even knew this person. And I have tried to reach out to her so much already and it's like she wants nothing to do with me at all. We seriously had such a good friendship I don't understand how she can just abandon everything so quickly. I have been nothing but wonderful to her.
edit: | my best friend kissed me and we were sorta together for about a month, now she is disgusted by herself, says our friendship can't be repaired despite my efforts, and we have stopped talking entirely. Do I be pissed or patient? |
[deleted] | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_upi0j | My bf (19) and I (female, 20) have been together for a year. We both love each other and we have a pretty fantastic relationship right now. We communicate well, deeply care for each other, have similar interests, and have mind blowing sex like at least once a day...
but...
I don't think I deserve him. The main reason is because in the first six months of our relationship, I was just a terrible girlfriend. I told people he was a bad bf at times... talked to my ex bf a lot.. got jealous of the dumbest things, pushed for sex early on... pushed for more emotional commitment...
The worst thing I ever did was kissed other boys. I'm not good with alcohol and I tend to be very physically affectionate with random people (hell, I've even kissed my sister before) but that is not a valid excuse. I'd tell him every time I kissed someone and we'd talk about it, but this happened with like three boys before I stopped drinking/going to parties.
I feel horrible for those incidents. I almost demanded that my bf break up with me, but he told me that as long as I was committed to him and our relationship, we could and would work it out. We have... and we are happy... but now I never ever ever feel like I deserve him. I was so awful the first few months and he stuck around, and then I cheated on him and he still stuck around. He's amazing. I love him so much. He deserves better. I feel so guilty whenever I get mad at him for something nowadays. Sometimes I feel like I want to make him realize that he can do so much better than me, but I'm too selfish to ever "give him up".
I've had emotional talks with him where I tell him that I'm a bad gf, that he deserves better and that he should break up with me... but he firmly tells me that he loves me and that I'm the one he wants to be with. Of course, I feel horrible for telling him that and freaking out and tell him that even if I don't deserve him, I don't want him to break up with me. Still, my feelings persist, I don't deserve him...he could do so much better, I'm just holding him back from a better girl... I shouldn't have gotten a second chance. He is WAY too good for me. All these thoughts in my head and I don't know what to do. Do I deserve him? Or am I just taking advantage of his amazing understanding and compassion?
I'm rambling now, but basically my | is:
Made some huge mistakes earlier in the relationship (including cheating) do I deserve to be with my bf?
Edit: Thanks to everyone for the comments. They've given me a lot to think about. I think a lot of you are right, the past is the past, I should learn from it but I shouldn't let it burden my present. The real burden for my bf right now is contantly having to reassure me... so I think I will start therapy so that I can work some issues out there rather than having "emotional talks" with my bf. This doesn't mean we won't talk abut our issues, its just obvious that this is an issue that has way more to do with me than him.
I will continue to be the best gf I can be... I'm really happy, he's really happy, and I will strive to make sure that I never hurt him again. Thank you everyone.
I'll probably delte this in about 30 min though, because my bf reads reddit and this story (the details in the comments) is one he'd recognize if he ever stumbled across it >< |
[deleted] | Fitness | t5_2qhx4 | t3_uq5t0 | im 15 years old male 120 5'6, and have been doing a modified starting strength for a little while, but i've kept on stalling.( i only did Squat OHP and Clean due to lack of confidence in my self control for deadlift and lack of equipment) i couldn't figure out why for a while, but now i know. looking at you guys diets, you are almost always at least a 1000 calorie surplus. i have maintaned my diet, because i live with my parents and do not control my diet/can't afford supplements.
so i talked to my dads friend who powerlifted and read some articles by bill star and some more about reg park, and my dad's friend and i put together a little routine, wanted to see what you think. the only thing im unsure of was whether or not i should superset. it said in some stuff by bill star that you could superset squat, clean and OHP but im not sure. it was something like making sure that you put the same effort into all your lifts, rather than being really tired by the time you do cleans.im really bad at formatting, so forgive that, but anyways, here goes
day 1, heavy
Squat, OHP and Power cleans, all following this format
5x60%
5x70%
5x80%
5x90%
5x100%
and then i would do chin ups and push ups, possibly following the routine from the 100 pushups/20 chinups challenge
day 2, light+deadlift
i'm not sure how to do the warm up sets for deadlifts, but i read in SS that you shouldn't do that many because they are really taxing, so advice there would be welcome.
after deadlifts (or maybe before, not sure) i would do squats and cleans, following the same routine
5x40%
5x50%
5x60%
5x70%
5x80%
and then i would do chin ups, push ups, and maybe curls ( i figured that since it is a light day, i will be less tired and could do some more accessories, advice here is welcome as well)
day 3 is medium day
squats OHP and cleans again
5x50%
5x60%
5x7-0%
5x80%
5x90%
an then chin ups and push ups.
no | if you could take the trouble to look through this, i would really appreciate this because ime kind of nervous and want a routine i could stick to for a while
EDIT:a lot of people seem to be misunderstanding what i am saying. this is not something i just pulled out of my head, it is a program that bill star used for younger athletes, all i did was add some light accessories and add deadlifts. i am 15 years old, do not control my diet so starting strength was too taxing. if you are not eating at a fairly large surplus, you cannot lift that heavy. sorry if i was confusing or misleading. |
[deleted] | TwoXChromosomes | t5_2r2jt | t3_uq61w | I've been on a birth control called tri-sprintec for a number of months, and I have started to slowly erode away into an emotionally volatile, anxious, moody individual. It's starting to seriously take its toll on my relationship, and I only realized recently that no, crying every day at the slightest provocation is not normal and no, even though I've always had chronic depression issues this is definitely not me. My boyfriend has to walk on eggshells all the time, and that's not good for either of us. I took a hard look at what changed and realized that I've always been extremely susceptible to small changes in my body chemistry. So I don't know for sure, but my BC seems like a likely cause. I've decided to go off of it and see if things get better.
My brief history with BC is that most of it has worsened my depression; the depo shot in particular made me batshit crazy. I had a terrible experience with getting an IUD, and although I was told that my cervix is too small I have reason to believe that they might not have been entirely honest or competent (that's a whole 'nother story but the | is midwifes at a Mormon maternity hospital), so that might be on the table.
Anyway, for you similarly physiologically sensitive ladies, what kind of birth control works for you besides condoms? I was a broken condom baby and I'm really uncomfortable with the idea of relying on them for the rest of my life, but the way this BC affects me is almost ruining my relationship (I'm pretty sure, we'll see) and I'm getting pretty spooked by the whole putting hormones in my body thing. |
[deleted] | relationship_advice | t5_2r0cn | t3_uqjea | Hey everyone,
I've been going out with this girl for a little over a month. I have never said I love you to a girl before, and I have gone out with girls for longer than a month, easy. This girl, however, I've fallen for.
Problem is, it's long distance. We get along very well, but we can only spend time together by talking at the moment. We've been good together, but this morning she said what you see above. She still wants to be with me, but our conversations seem to be pretty similar each time. We talk about our feelings, or our day.
I can relate with her, but I just don't know what to do. Any advice on how to keep long distance relationships interesting? Anything we can talk about besides how our day has been, or how we feel about each other?
Any help would be greatly appreciated! She means a lot to me..
Thanks.
[EDIT] I've been told | a few too many times here, I've tried to keep it short, but I'll give you a shorter version if you want. |
[deleted] | sex | t5_2qh3p | t3_uvdip | So my girlfriend and I would usually both rather not have sex during her period, but it was one one of those "maybe days" at the end of it, so we decided to go at it anyway. We're about 30 seconds in missionary and...my nose starts bleeding...right on her face. We quickly cleaned up and eventually finished afterwards (of course everything downstairs was fine) and laughed about for a long time. Still one of the funnier things I've experienced in a sexual endeavor.
hahaha | had ironic sex - worried about her period...ended up bleeding on her face |
[deleted] | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_uyvtc | 20/f, daddy issues, family issues, PTSD
I've dated many, many many men and women in the last three years-- people as young as age 16 to as old 30. All of them fail after the "spark" fades and i do think it is due to not having a good exampled structure of a relationship when i was young. (Parents split when i was 5, i witnessed their breakup fight; dad then went to live with woman who i just recently learned is his girlfriend/lover. Mom has had many boyfriends that all fail because they took advantage of her weak will and poor mental health and gullibility.)
So, naturally, i can watch tv and movies and imagine what a good relationship is like, but i can't grasp it in real life.
I know i'm only 20 but, all of my realtionships have crashed and burned.
i usually end up being overly promiscuous when they fail to fill the void. This skews things even further when i beat myself up about it.
I tend to have "burst attraction" to people--strong emotional or sexual attraction that will only last a certain amount of time/ will be very spontaneous. Eg really being attracted to an individual, then not wanting anything to do with them.
I'm kind of a pushover and i go out of my way to help people, and end up staying with people longer than i should even though i don't like them or simply like them but have no sexual attraction to them.
The relationship i'm in now hit its 8 month mark and i've been happy until the last two months or so, where the spark is dying. I'm really unhappy because i legitimately like and respect this man. But the sexual attraction is fading and it's making me miserable.
I know that there is no proprietary "healthy relationship" rules but i am realizing at the ripe age of 20 that i have no idea what i'm looking for or chasing after when i get involved with people. I'm a hopeless romantic and, sometimes, a very sexual person-- dangerous combination.
No | as all details are important. Please read whole post if you want to comment, this is not something to summarize.
Can i have perspective on this?
Is it even worth it to try and persue a normal relationship, if the idea of it was not properly structured in my brain at a younger age? Should i just try to fix myself before i continue on? I'm so fucking lost and i'm sick of making bad choices that affect me for months or even years, and hurting others in the process
Edit: sentence structure |
[deleted] | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_uz5fh | I'm 26/m, shes 25/f
Been together 5 years
Really need some advice. To first point out, I have an amazing girlfriend, we are in love, we never fight, and I would never cheat on her. I went with a few friends drinking , ended up somehow blacking out in 2 hours on a few drinks, and stumbled home. I live downtown so I didn't have far to go. The last thing I remember is vaguely talking with friends outside the bar, then coming home 30 minutes or so later. I couldn't use my keys, and I stumbled in with my pants half undone. When she told me this the next morning I assumed I probably urinated somewhere inappropriate, which is something I shamefully do. Anyway, she kept pressing me who I was with, what i was doing. I vaguely lastly remember talking with a guy acquaintance outside, but didn't know his name, so I drunkly say "I don't know, I don't know his name" After so much pressing I say to her "I screwed some girl, OK? Happy?" I say this in my drunken state coming home.
I have been dwelling on that so much, its been almost 3 weeks. I asked everyone what happened that night with no leads that I acted inappropriately. I think I may have just said it to be a drunken ass, since I know I was actually talking to the guy outside about my girlfriend, since they were both from the same city in a different state. Do I tell her I'm uneasy I may have done something? I'll never know, since I can't even remember. There was one girl I was suspicious of but she acted normal around me, and I even asked her and she said she thinks we vaguely talked sometime during the night but that was it.
I just don't know what to do, I keep thinking and almost believing stories I'm making up in my head about me doing something shitty to my girlfriend. Thing I would never in a million years dream of doing. I have a problem with holding onto ideas like this, so I mean, any advice...
<b> | b> Blacked out, didn't know what I did, or what to tell my girlfriend |
[deleted] | Games | t5_2qhwp | t3_uz5ry | So this is somewhat behind the curve in terms of news, but I'd like to discuss sexism and harassment in the gaming community.
So I heard about the [Tropes vs. Women]( kickstarter a while ago, but only recently went to check it out. I was avoiding it because I don't consider myself a hardcore feminist - I don't have any torches or pickets, I just think we ladyfolks should have the right to vote and all.
The | version is a nice lady wanted funding to make videos talking about sexism in gaming - Princess Peach needs constant saving, jiggle physics in DOA, etc. [And this happened](
So. Yeah.
Do you think the gaming community is less welcoming to women than other communities? And if we are less welcoming, why?
What is it that makes the gaming community so hateful as compared to other mediums/communities/fanbases? |
thr0waway201014 | relationships | t5_2qjvn | t3_2h055l | hi all. so I have been with this amazing guy(24) for 5 years. we have a great relationship, we get along really well, rarely ever fight. end of 2013 we had a son together and moved in together. In the last couple of months I have been dreamig about this guy I knew back in highschool. It all started when, talking to my guy, he said that he'd be ok if I slept with someone else, hes pretty open minded and has a lot of trust in our relationship. he asked who id sleep with if I could sleep with anyone and i immediately thought on "johnny"(26). Now I cant get him off my mind, he shows up in my dreams, I daydream about him...
Background story about Johnny:
guy 2 yrs older than me, met him through family friends. Had a MASSIVE crush on him for all of highschool. I stalked him at school, thought about him constantly, he was aware of this and flirted with me, but it was just for fun for him. I confronted him and said I liked him on MSN (I know, im so cool) and he said it would be weirs because our families are friends. But he kept flirting. Our families drifted apart
** | in committed relationship, got permission to sleep w/other guy. since then I fantasize about past crush. see questions below:
and I never saw him again.
I guess I am asking 2 questions:
should I pursure my guy's suggestion that I could sleep with someone else?
if I did, wpuld it be unwise to pursue johnny? |